最后的维加斯

是这样的
Thing is…
昨晚
last night…
我尿床了
I peed myself.
爸 我很抱歉
Oh, Pop, I’m sorry.
这只是一个男人 必须处理的事之一 独自处理
It’s just one of those things a man has to deal with, alone.
好的
Okay, all right.
我去教堂会所那里 没事 那里人很好 星期一回来 爸
山姆 他妈的行李箱打开
Open the damn trunk, Sam.
等等 这租来的 我不知道怎么开
Wait, it’s a rental! I don’t know where the thing is!
等着 等着 找到了
Hang on, hang on! There it is.
开了
It’s open!
-扳门把呀 -山姆 开锁
-Let go of the handle. -Sam, unlock the door.
快扳呀 扳门把呀
Let go of it. Let go of the handle!
-啥 -后退就是了
-What? -Just step back!
冲 冲 冲
Go, go, go.
安全带 系上安全带
Seat belt, seat belt.
-阿奇柏尔德 -嗨 山姆
-Archibald. -Hey, Sam.
你看来不错
You look good.
你说谎功夫不错
You lie good.
到了
Yeah.
就是这儿
There it is.
-来赌一把吧 -赌啥
-Let’s start the gambling early. -What?
赌100元 帕迪不会来
Hundred dollars says Paddy will not come.
不 不 他必须要来
No, no, he’s got to come.
比利不知拜托我们几次了
Billy’s come through for us more times than I can count.
该我们行动了
It’s our turn.
痞子
Prick
混♥蛋♥
Asshole.
见到你真高兴
Hey. Good to see you.
来布鲁克林做什么
What the hell are you doing in Brooklyn?
听说这有浴衣派对
I heard there was a bathrobe convention.
-是这没错吧 -别耍嘴皮子
-Have I come to the right spot? -Don’t be a smart-ass.
-进来吧 -阿奇也来了
-Come on in. -Archie’s here too.
他待在车上 因为
He’s out in the car. He couldn’t make the…
他的状况 没办法爬这么多楼梯
All the flights of stairs in his condition.
-阿奇来了 -是呀
-Archie’s here? -Yeah.
-在车上 -怎回事
-In the car. -What’s going on?
因为我们三个
Well, the three of us
去拉斯维加斯度周末
are gonna go to Las Vegas for the weekend.
为什么我要去拉斯维加斯
Why on earth would I ever want to go to Vegas?
找乐子呀 还记得找乐子吗
For fun! Remember fun?
在你这变成这付结屎脸前 我们常做的啊
That thing you used to have before the permanent scowl set in?
胡说 我才没有结屎脸
Come on, I don’t have a permanent scowl.
-用结屎脸说没有结屎 -就说我没结
-He said with a scowl. -I don’t!
好吧 不是屎脸 是天生丑脸
Okay, it’s not a scowl, you’re just ugly.
来吧 赶快随便包一包 几个小时就飞到了
Look, just throw some things in a bag. The flight leaves in a couple of hours.
快 你不去 我们就不走
Come on! We’re not leaving without you.
你要么跟我们走 要么我们就搬进来跟你耗
Either you come with us, or we move in.
等等 你们突然冒出来
Hold on, hold on. You show up out of nowhere,
然后就说要去拉斯维加斯 你知道吗
you say we’re going to Vegas. You know what?
-这有点比利·葛森的感觉 -帕迪 比利 葛
-This smells of Billy Gherson. -Oh, Paddy, Billy Gher…?
这 这跟他无
This…This has nothing to…
比利 当然我们也希望他来 但
Billy, we want him to come, of course.
他 那个 你知道他有重要的事
But then he…You know, he’s got a big
-他有要事要做 -想当然了
-important thing he has to do. -Of course.
他每次都有要事要办
He always has something important.
问题在此 每次都提他如何如何
That’s the problem. It’s always about him, him, him.
-每次都讲他干嘛 -不过是比利而已 别再想了
-What’s that about? -That’s just Billy! Put it behind you!
没错 他有要事要办
That’s right, he’s got more important things to do.
我这儿也有要事要办
I have more important things to do right here.
跟苏菲的合照 四处都是
What’s with the pictures of Sophie? They’re everywhere.
我转个身 放眼望去都是苏菲
Everywhere I turn, that’s all I see: Sophie!
你不觉得这有点病态了吗
It’s getting a little morbid, don’t you think?
别乱碰
Don’t…Don’t touch those.
-拜托 -好 抱歉
-Jesus. -Okay, sorry.
-我喜欢看着她 -好
-I like looking at her. -Okay.
那个在那边 这个放这边
That stays there, this stays here.
好 但我们要一起去拉斯维加斯
Okay. But you come with me to Vegas.
帕迪 你要跟我们一起去拉斯维加斯
Paddy, you have got to come with us to Las Vegas.
如果你以为我会离开这房♥子
If you think I’m leaving this apartment,
那你比你那顶帽子还蠢
you’re dumber than that hat.
你可以笑我 但不可以笑我的帽子
Say what you want to me, but leave my hat out of this, okay?
帽子没得罪你
My hat has never done a thing to you.
-我不去拉斯维加斯 -帕迪
-I’m not going to Vegas! -Paddy!
你干嘛上来 你疯了吗
What, are you…? Are you nuts?
想再中风一次吗
You’re gonna give yourself another stroke!
阿奇 还好吗
Archie, you okay?
-他是 -楼梯 帕迪
-Is he…? -The stairs. Paddy.
你要来
You got to come.
你要跟我们去拉斯维加斯
You got to come to Vegas with us.
-拜托 帕迪 -好 好
-Please, Paddy. -Okay. Okay.
好 我去 总行了吧
Okay! All right, I’ll go!
我去 我去 总行了吧
I’ll go! I’m going! I’m going, okay?
-好极了 -我打包一下
-Great. -I got to pack.
-痞子 -混♥蛋♥
-Prick. -Asshole.
演的真好
That was well done.
所以比利太忙
So Billy was so busy,
没办法跟他在这世上 交情最久的三个朋友过周末
he couldn’t spend the weekend with his three oldest friends in the world.
真像他
Typical.
一日自私 终身自私的混♥蛋♥
Once a selfish bastard, always a selfish bastard.
不会变的 从不会变得
Never changes. Never, never changes.
你也了解 他就是我行我素
You know, that’s the thing about him, he’s just the way he is.
什么事会比老兄弟重聚重要
What was so important that he couldn’t spend it with us?
那么重要
So important?
帕迪 我同意你
I agree with everything you’ve said, Paddy.
刚刚所有说的
For the last four hours.
他呀 他呀 甚至连通电♥话♥也没
Him, him, him. He didn’t even call.
你说 真让人失望 连通电♥话♥
You know, he…A disappointment. He didn’t…
也没打 我只能说要是
He didn’t even call. All I can say is, if I ever,
让我在遇到这混♥蛋♥ 这烂痞子 我
ever run into that son of a bitch again, that prick, I’ll…
别说了
Forget it.
会让他后悔莫及
He’ll regret the day…
惊喜
Surprise!
阿奇 怎么啦 山姆
Hey, Archie, how you doing? Sam.
爽
Hey! Fun. Fun!
那发色是怎地
Hey, hey, what’s that hair color?
-榛子色 -你去植发了
-Hazelnut? -Have you got more hair
头毛比以前多
than you used to have?
-别闹了 你们 -头毛真的比以前多
-Oh, stop it, will you? -You’ve got more hair than…
多的头毛从哪来的
Where’d you get the extra hair?
屁♥眼♥吧
His ass.
派特 别生他们的气
Hey, look, don’t be upset with them, Pat.
-他们没错 -我要回家
-It wasn’t their fault. -I’m going home.
帕迪 我要结婚了 知道吗
Paddy, look, I’m getting married, okay?
这是结束单身派对 我需要你在这儿
This is a bachelor party, I needed you here.
-我要回家 -都多久了
-I’m going home. -How many times
我还要道歉多久
do I got to tell you I’m sorry?
永远都不够 永远都嫌不够
You can’t say it enough, my friend. You can’t say it enough.
我们每次见面 都要老调重弹
Every time I see you, we go through this shit.
再废话 我就海扁你一顿 像五年级那时一样
One more word, I’m gonna knock your block off like I did in fifth grade.
好了 好了 消停一会儿
All right, all right, all right. Hey, hey, hey! Knock this shit off!
你们俩他妈的是怎么了
The hell’s the matter with you?
现在我们同聚一堂 4人组一同
Now we’re here together, the four of us.
我们要一同庆祝比利娶了个儿童
We’re here to celebrate Billy marrying an infant.
-她才不是儿童 -闭嘴 比利
-She’s not an infant. -Shut up, Billy!
阿奇 注意血压
Archie, blood pressure?
我需要
I need this.
山姆需要
Sam needs this.
相信我 你们俩混球更需要
And believe it or not, you two jerk-offs need it most of all.
要么俩人和好
Now, either you’ll manage to be civil with each other,
要么我教训你俩一顿