最后的维加斯

只是暂时的
Yeah, this is just a temporary one.
-超感心 -会再买♥♥个真的
-So sweet. -Until we get the real thing.
-是呀 -他应该是指店里最大颗的
-Yeah. -By which he means the biggest one.
你好 比利
Hello, Billy.
嗨 尼尔
Hey, Neil.
还算快吧 我跟你女儿的订婚派对
Your daughter got this engagement party together pretty fast, huh?
深思熟虑后 她大概不想浪费时间吧
Yeah, she probably didn’t want to waste a lot of time, considering.
是呀 是吧
Yeah. Yeah.
不好意思 等一下
Excuse me one minute, please.
那个 这瓶你从哪拿来的
Where…Where’d you get that bottle?
威士忌没了 从后面那箱子找到的
Ran out of Scotch, found this in the back of that cabinet.
不 不可以 你 你不可以动它
No, no, no. You…You don’t want to open that.
绝对不可以
No, no.
你好
Hello?
我找药罐人
Hey, is this the bionic man?
比利 怎么啦 有啥事
Hey, Billy, how you doing? What’s going on?
-干嘛压低声音说话 -米莉安拖我来
-What are you whispering about? -Oh, Miriam dragged me
一个烂人派对
to a hideous dinner party.
我正在药柜里找找
I’m just going through someone named Abraham Rosenbaum’s
看样子有个 亚伯医生 牌
medicine cabinet.
似乎有些致命的玩意儿 让我死了算
He’s got some very deadly shit here.
-等等 我找阿奇三方通话 -好
-Hang on, let me patch in Archie. -Okay.
他们 你疯了吗
…all these guys? Are you insane?
-至少我结婚了 -谁管你
-At least I have a husband. -Oh, whatev…
-这是克莱顿家 -怎么啦 阿奇
-Clayton residence. -How you feeling, Arch?
比利 近来如何
Billy, hey, hey! How you doing?
我正在看婆婆妈妈肥皂剧
I’m just sitting here watching this Housewives thing.
太可怕了 真的是
Horrible people, horrible.
-嗨 阿奇 -嗨 山姆
-Hey, Arch. -Hey, Sam.
-你的钛屁♥股♥如何啊 -那是去年的事了
-How’s the titanium hip, man? -No, the hip was last year.
现在是钛膝盖 状况良好 还不错
It’s my knee. It’s great, yeah.
我想下次应该是去做钛睾丸了
I’m thinking about having my balls done next.
好了大伙儿 听我说我有重要的事
All right, listen, guys. I got something important here, all right?
-不会吧 比利 -心脏病还是癌症
-Oh, shit, Billy. -Heart or cancer?
前列腺 还是什么的
Prostate? What?
为什么电♥话♥一响 你们就觉得有人快挂了
Why every time the phone rings, you think somebody’s dying?
我们佛罗里达这儿 通常电♥话♥响
I live in Florida now. Usually, when the phone rings,
-就是有人死了 -我要结婚了
-somebody is dying. -No, I’m getting married.
啥
What?
跟那个你一半年纪的女生
To that lady who’s half your age?
-她快32岁了 -我的痔疮也差不多32岁
-She’s almost 32. -I have a hemorrhoid that’s almost 32.
阿奇 当她到我这年纪时
Now, look, Archie, by the time she’s my age,
那时我
okay, I’ll be…
死了 你早就死很久了 比利
Dead. You’ll be dead, Billy.
比利 比利 比利
Billy, Billy, Billy.
这儿已经有活生生的例子
You’ve got your whole what’s left of your life ahead of you.
我的意思是 看看阿奇
I mean, you know. Look at Archie.
离婚 悲惨生活
He’s divorced and miserable.
我则结婚40年了
I’ve been married almost 40 years,
而我 宁可像阿奇一样悲惨
and I wish I was as miserable as Archie.
难道你们这些朋友 就不能支持我一下吗
Can you guys maybe give me a little support as my dearest friends?
-怎么样 -抱歉 你说的对 我失言
-How about it? -Sorry, you’re right, sorry.
很好 结婚是好消息
Yes, good…It’s good news.
听到你要结婚 我们都很高兴
We’re happy you’re getting married.
是吧 好吧 你怎会突然想到要结婚
Right. So…So how’d you pop the question?
你记得我朋友罗尼吗
You remember my friend Ronnie,
我同事 我的前辈
the guy I worked with, who trained me?
-记得 记得 不错的家伙 -他不错
-Yeah, yeah, love that guy. -Good guy.
他死了 我
Yeah, well, he died. I…
我在葬礼上求婚的
I proposed at the funeral.
我听不懂 阿奇
I got nothing. Arch?
所以 丽莎 她不想劳师动众盛大举办
So, Lisa, she doesn’t want a big wedding or anything,
所以 我们想在这周末 到拉斯维加斯办一办算了
so we’re gonna get married in Vegas this weekend.
要在拉斯维加斯办告别单身派对咯
So we’re gonna have a bachelor party in Vegas.
-不 不 别闹了 -不 我们要办
-No, no, come on, forget it. -No, no, no, yes, we are.
-一定要办 -这可是你第一次结婚
-We are. -It’s your first wedding.
你帮我们都办了派对呢
You threw all of our bachelor parties for us.
-我还办2次 -但时间紧迫
-Two for me. -Yeah, but we got no time.
-星期天就是婚礼了 -比利
-We’re getting married on Sunday. -Billy.
所以 可以的 我们坐周五的飞机到
So we…No, it’s fine. We fly in on Friday,
周六时 给你最棒的告别单身派对
Saturday we give…We give you the best bachelor party
保证绝无仅有
in the history of mankind,
礼拜天 你的伴娘才到 我们
and then on Sunday your child-bride flies in and…
说真的
Are you serious?
-当然 -当然 兄弟
-Yeah. -Yeah, man.
比利 现在是下午4:15
Billy, it is 4: 15 in the afternoon,
我正在午餐派对
and I’m at a dinner party.
我再不离开
If I don’t get out of here soon,
可能会把所有罐子打开 吞药自杀
I’m gonna swallow all of Abe Rosenbaum’s pills at once.
-你呢 阿奇 -我儿子不准
-What about you, Arch? -My son won’t let me go.
不能抽烟 喝酒 吃太咸
I can’t smoke, drink, eat salt,
晚上9点就要上♥床♥ 但我
or stay out past 9:00, but…
-阿奇没问题了 -太棒了 真的是 我太高兴了
-Archie’s in. -All right, all right! No, I love this.
-真是太棒了 兄弟 -我们是最棒的兄弟
-This is great, man. -We’re invincible, baby.
福拉布许4人组再显威风
Flatbush Four, we ride again.
福拉布许4人组 没错
The Flatbush Four, yes.
好啦 那谁要通知 阳光船长
Yeah, so who’s gonna call Captain Sunshine?
-比利 -听着 伙计们
-Billy. -Look, guys…
我知道他恨我 可是他也要到场才行
I know he hates me now, but he’s got to be there.
你们清楚 我也清楚
You know it, I know it,
帮我个忙 你们处理一下
so do me a favor. You guys figure it out, all right?
-我要忙了 我挂线了 -等等 比利 比利
-I got to go now, I’m hanging up. -Wait, wait, Billy, Billy.
好了 我去说谎骗儿子 你去报告老婆大人
All right, I’ll lie to my son, you tell your wife.
好
Okay.
租车及地图的资料在包包里
So your rental car confirmation is in your bag.
到纽约时
And when you get to New York,
跟着指示就能到阿奇家了
just follow the directions to Archie’s house.
-很好 -开心吗
-Good. -You getting excited?
当然 肯定是
Oh, yeah, sure. Yeah.
拉斯维加斯告别单身派对 和一堆老骨头们
Bachelor party in Vegas with a bunch of old fogies. I…
-是吧 -你在生气
-Oh, come on. -You’re angry at me,
-要是不想我去 我就不去 -不 我没生气
-you don’t want me to go. I’ll stay. -No, I’m not angry.
别乱想 只是
No, don’t. Just…
到拉斯维加斯再打开
Don’t open it until you get to Las Vegas.
-这是什么 -亲爱的 别打开
-What is it? -No, honey, just leave it until you…
好 想开就开吧
Okay, or now, if you want to open it now.
拉斯维加斯必备
“What happens in Vegas stays in Vegas”?
保险套 威而刚
A condom and a Viagra?
-你哪来的保险套 -你傻了
-Where did you get a condom? -That’s your reaction?
我一个月有30天都在药局 拿个保险套
I’m at the pharmacy 30 times a day, I can get a condom.
亲爱的 你看起来不快乐
Sweetheart, you’re unhappy.
像眼中失去光彩
It’s like the light has gone out of your eyes.
像佛罗里达的笑话说 吃腻了
And the Florida jokes, they’re…They’re getting tired.
我想要昔日那个男人回来
And I…I want my guy back.
所以 我猜只要你
So I…I thought, if…If you…
我也不想知道过程
I don’t want to know what you do.
别告诉我 我们以后也不再提起
Don’t tell me about it, and we will never bring it up again.
这是 什么恶作剧吗 还是
You…Is this some kind of trick? What…
-我该下车了 -下车吧
-I’m afraid to get out of the car. -Get out of the car.
-你没事吧 -下车
-Are you…-Get out of the car.
好 爱你
Okay, love you.
爱你
Love you.
埃兹拉
Ezra!
-我以为你上班了 -我打几个电♥话♥就出门
-I thought you left for work. -I had to make some phone calls.
-要起床了吗 -不
-Are you gonna get out of bed? -No.
冷 会冷
Cold. Cold.
爸 这还温温的呢
Pop, it…It’s sweltering in here.
-是吗 -是
-Is it? -Yeah.
也许我应该留在家
Listen, maybe I should stay home today.
不用 你不用
No. You…You don’t have to do that.