杀死波诺（2011）

for Top of the Pops, but I’m sure we can sort that out later.
所以 你愿意签下我们 是吗
So, you do want to sign us, then? Do you?
嗯 看情况
Well, that depends.
要知道 音乐这行是一个无情的行业
See, the music industry is a very fickle business.
就像是一群俊男美女在一间房♥里
It’s like a harem filled with beautiful people
尽情狂欢
all fucking each other’s brains out.
而外面有成千上万丑陋的 无能的失败者
But outside there are thousands of ugly, talentless lepers
张牙舞爪的涌进来 想要分一杯羹
all clawing their way in, trying to get a piece of the action.
你们是哪一类人
Which one are you?
呃
Um…
俊男美女型
The beautiful people.
你们想进这一行
Do you want in to the harem?
是的 拜托了 是的 我想 想啊
Yes, please. Yes, I do. I do.
好吧 那行
Well, OK then.
成功了 赞
Yes. Yes. Yes.
尝试写首歌♥
And try and write a song that doesn’t have kids
不要太深奥
reaching for their dictionaries.
同时 避开强♥奸♥这个范畴
And also, steer clear of the whole rape area.
恶心
It’s a bad area.
还有麦考密克兄弟 改掉你们的名字
And… and The McCormick Brothers. Change your name.
听上去像是乡村歌♥手 可以出去了
You sound like a fucking folk act. Now get out.
预约一下时间 下回来就签约了
Arrange an appointment. We’ll come back and squiggle a contract next time.
走吧
Go!
什么事
What?!
太好了 我就说了在伦敦一切容易多了
Well… I did say it would be easy in London.
那可不 容易得冒烟
That wasn’t easy, that was a big fat piece of easy…
就如捏碎一块柠檬蛋糕一样简单
peasy fucking lemon squeezy cake,
真顺利
given away free, with today’s Easy Times.
来 帅哥 我们签约了
Come here, you beauty! We just got signed.
-我们被签了 -是的
-We got signed. -Yes!
你们得了解我的规矩 这是必须的
You’ll need to know my rules, of course.
不能碰毒品
No drugs.
除非是和房♥东一同分享 用来补贴房♥租
Unless, of course, shared with the landlord to supplement the rent.
呃
Mmm.
还有就是不能有非法性行为
And no outlawed sexual practices.
除非理由同上条所述
Unless ditto the above.
很不错
-Wow. -Yeah, cosy.
非常适合乐队在这练习
Perfect for band practise though.
刚出道的摇滚小子 我就知道
Ah. Budding rock stars. I might have known.
我射过不少像你们这样的帅小伙
I’ve shot a lot of pretty boys like you.
在这座城市里是合法的吗
Is that legal in this country?
摄影的摄啦
In between my fashion work.
-你是摄影师 -曾经是 但现在已经老了
-Oh, you’re a photographer. -Was. Now I’m just growing old.
苟延残喘 为了后代苟活于世
Disgracefully. Pickling myself for posterity.
一件事归一件事 顺便说声 如果你们真想住在这
One party at a time. Oh, if you do take the place, by the way,
你们得学会适应我的聚会
you’ll have to get used to my parties.
告诉我
Tell me…
你们在一起多长时间了
…how long have you two been together?
他们在一起到现在差不多4年了
Well, they’ve been together for about four years, now.
-他们是在学校组建的 所以 -不是U2 你个白♥痴♥
-They formed at school, so… -Not U2, you idiot.
他是问我们俩
Us two. We…
我们我们从小就在一起 卡尔
We’ve… we’ve been together since we were boys, Karl.
-哦 那有蛮长时间了 -是的 显然 我们是
-Yeah, that is a long time. -Yeah, well, obviously. We are…
伊万 乐队会议 现在
Ivan? Band meeting. Now.
我想要这 这很不错 想想我们在这能做些什么
I want it, it’s incredible. Think what we could do with this place.
这什么家具都没有 这只是个烂工厂而已
There’s no furniture. It’s a fucking factory.
而且 他很奇怪 直觉告诉我他想爆我菊花
Plus, I think he’s weird. Plus, I think he wants to stick his thing in me.
-那正好 -什么
-Exactly. -What?
他正在寻找特殊类型的租客
He is looking for a certain type of tenant.
我觉得可行 我们要做的
I can feel a deal here. All we have to do…
什么 做他的娈童 让他降租 不 尼尔
Is what? Is be his rent boy, and he’ll drop the rent? No, Neil.
说真的 如果你这么做 我马上回爱尔兰
Seriously, if you do this, I’m off back to Ireland.
行 行 行
OK, OK, OK, OK.
-我跟他说 我跟他说 -好的 去吧
-I’ll tell him. I will tell him. -OK, do.
嘿 卡尔
Hi, Karl!
嗨 葛罗瑞亚
Oh, hi, Gloria.
这是葛罗瑞亚 住隔壁的
That’s Gloria. Lives next door.
-这儿我们要了 -噢
-We’ll take it. -Oh.
帅哥们
Boys, boys.
噢 瞧瞧你们俩
Oh, well, look at you.
抢劫了史班杜芭蕾合唱团的衣橱了吗
Somebody’s been raiding Spandau Ballet’s closet, haven’t they?
-葛罗瑞亚 -嗨 卡尔
-Gloria? -Hi, Karl.
过来认识一下你的邻居
Come and meet your neighbours.
-你们好 邻居 -噢 你是美国人
-Hello, neighbours. -Oh, you’re American.
你怎么猜到的 是因为我的口音吗
How did you guess? Was it my accent?
抱歉 这是伊万 他总显得没见过世面似的
Sorry, this is Ivan. Sometimes he acts like he lives in a field.
哦 这是尼尔 他总觉得自己什么都知道
Oh, and this is Neil. Sometimes he acts like a massive nobhead.
葛罗瑞亚以前跟你们一样
Gloria used to be in your game.
-是原创朋克乐手 -酷
-That’s the original punk rocker. -Cool.
-这么说你们是个乐团 -是的
-So you boys are in a band? -Yeah.
噢 难怪 我想我知道为什么你们穿成这样了
Oh, good. I guess that would explain the costumes.
-这不是演出服 -不是 我们平常就这么穿的
-These aren’t costumes. -No, we always dress like this.
嘿 伊万 为什么你不去拿点啤酒来
Hey, Ivan. Why don’t you go and get us some beers?
对啊 猛♥男♥ 走
Yes. Come along, tiger.
我带你去见识见识
Let’s get you socially lubricated.
就是 去 猛♥男♥
Yeah, go on, tiger.
嘿 伙计们 我跟你们介绍伊万
Hi, guys. I want you to meet Ivan.
嗨 美女们 感觉怎么样
Hiya, girls. How’s it going?
伊万 别理这些女孩们 去见见帅哥们
Ivan, never mind the girls. Meet the boys.
这是默文 约书亚 还有拉斐尔
This is Mervin and Joshua and Raphael.
哦 你以前见过他 格温 亲爱的
Oh, you’ve met him before. Gwen, love.
这么说 你是朋克
So, you’re a punk?
我吗
Am I?
对 是卡尔说的
Well, that’s what Karl said.
还有 之前我见过你的T恤
Plus, before, I saw your… t-shirt.
不是现在 是之前 莱蒙斯 真好 很不错
Not now, before. The Ramones. Good choice. Good choice.
很抱歉 是不是觉得有点
Sorry. Is that a bit…
有点怪 我能记得这些 像个追踪狂似的
…a bit creepy, me remembering that? A bit too stalker?
-是的 -那好吧
-Yep. -Right.
好吧
Right.
-来一点 亲爱的 -呃
-Fancy a toot, love? -Oh.
多谢
Thanks, love.
-很过瘾吧 -嗯
-That hit the spot? -Uh-huh.
葛罗瑞亚
Gloria.
别霸着他 他应该自己去转转
Don’t hog the boy. He’s got to spread himself around.
我告诉大家他们将会是下一个U2
I’m telling people they’re the next U2.
不仅长得好看
Only better looking.
还是基佬
And gay.
基佬U2 这名字不错 你不这么认为吗 尼尔
Oh, the gay U2. Has a certain ring to it. Don’t you think, Neil?
好了 卡尔 他们交给你了 我先走 还有演出
It’s OK, Karl. He’s all yours. I was just leaving, I have a play to go to.
-拜 -葛罗瑞亚
-Bye. -Gloria.
我就让你自个呆了5分钟 你就给我吸毒
I leave you alone for five minutes and you’re snorting drugs at a gay party.
-老妈会怎么说 -我知道
-What would mam say? -I know.
-还有么 -是的
-Has he got any more, do you think? -Yeah, yeah.
我们很快就会进录音室 准备拍MV
And we’re gonna be in the studio soon. We’re gonna be doing a music video.
就像那些大牌 在雪地里的冰雪宫殿
Like those big fuck off, snow white palace in all the snow, like.
要不裸体 要不♥穿♥貂皮大衣
Except for we’re naked. Except for we’re wearing fur.
所有人都在跳舞 每个人都在幻想
And everybody’s dancing, everybody’s thinking about
与其他人做♥爱♥ 不对 等等
having sex with each other. But no, wait.
实际上每个人都在做♥爱♥
Everybody is actually having sex with each other.
你 我 在片中的所有人 雪地里的每个人
You, me, everyone in the whole video, all up in Iceland and stuff.
靠 看哪 他在亲那鸟人 放开她
Fucking hell, look, he’s snogging that bird now. Get off her!
天哪 噢 该死
Jesus. Oh, shit.
你不介意我关灯吧
Would you mind if we did it with the lights off?
希望昨晚胡搞是值得的 因为我们已经过了签约时间了
I hope that shag was worth it, ’cause we’re late for signing our contract.
我有点心痛 我担心是因为那些可♥卡♥因♥
Maybe I’m getting heartache. I’m feeling a bit worried ’cause of the coke.
-我感觉又紧张又亢奋 -你闭嘴好吗
-I think I’m feeling a bit hyper. -Will you shut up?
你好
Hello.
哈蒙德在哪
Hi, where is Hammond?
-你是新来的跑腿 -不是
-Are you the new runners? -No.
不 我们不是跑腿的 我们是麦考密克兄弟