朱诺

My stepmom, Bren, makes me eat super healthy, you know?
我不能站在微波炉前面
I can’t stand in front of the microwave,
不能吃巧克力豆
and no red M&Ms.
希望你准备好了
I hope you’re ready.
你听到了吗
Do you hear that?
什么
What?
这首是我的最爱
This is my favorite song.
这是音速青年翻唱卡朋特的《超级巨星》
This is Sonic Youth doing “Superstar” by the Carpenters.
对 对 我知道卡朋特乐队
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I know the Carpenters.
女鼓手 怪男人
Chick drummer, freaky dude,
跟白色条纹乐队差不多
not unlike the White Stripes.
你从没听过这样的卡朋特
You haven’t heard the Carpenters like this.
听就是了
Just listen.
你的吉他
Your guitar
-听起来甜美干净 -对 这我喜欢
– It sounds so sweet and clear – Yeah. Yeah, I like this.
你说你最爱的乐队是哪个
What… what did you say your favorite band was?
没有最爱 就觉得傀儡乐队
Didn’t. It’s a three-way tie between
佩蒂·史密斯和逃亡乐队都很不错
the Stooges, Patti Smith and the Runaways.
趁孩子还没出来
I am definitely making you some CDs,
我得混几张CD给你
at least while my kid’s in there.
还记得你说过你爱我吗 宝贝
Don’t you remember you told me you love me, baby
《血腥魔法师》
The Wizard of Gore?
那是赫舍尔·戈登·刘易斯的作品
That is Herschell Gordon Lewis.
他是终极恐怖大♥师♥
He’s the ultimate master of horror.
拜托
Please!
达里欧·阿基多才是终极恐怖大♥师♥
Dario Argento is so the ultimate master of horror.
阿基多 他还好
Argento? He’s… he’s all right.
刘易斯才是超级强
But Lewis is completely demented.
那一桶桶的粘稠物
Okay? We’re talking about buckets of goo.
到处都是红色的玉米糖浆
I mean, there’s red corn syrup all over the place.
太极图里飞出大脑来
There’s fake brains coming out the yin-yang.
老实说 这看起来有点蠢
Quite frankly, this looks a little stupid.
给我带子
Give me the tape.
这片子比《阴风阵阵》还赞
This is even better than Suspiria.
我说什么来着
What’d I tell you?
牛逼啊
Kudos.
你对血腥片的品味不错啊
You have decent taste in slasher movies.
看来我俩趣味相投
Here’s to dovetailing interests.
你们考虑给孩子起什么名字了吗
Have you guys thought of any names for the baby yet?
想了点
Sort of, yes.
要是女孩 瓦妮莎想叫麦迪生
Vanessa likes Madison for a girl.
麦迪生
Madison?
等等
Wait, hold on.
你不觉得有点基吗
Isn’t that, like, a little… gay?
口气挺狂啊
Pretentious much?
难不成叫朱诺那种神话名字吗
Should everyone just have a mysterious name like Juno?
不是那样的
No.
那是我老爸为了
you see, my dad went through
把他对罗马和希腊神话的着迷贯彻到底
this huge obsession with Roman and Greek mythology.
于是就给我起了个宙斯老婆的名字[其实不是]So he decided to name me after Zeus’ wife.
宙斯炮♥友♥遍天下
Zeus, like, he had tons of lays,
但朱诺是他唯一的妻子
but I’m pretty sure Juno was his only wife.
这个妻子
And she was supposed to be,
貌美腹黑
like, really beautiful, but really mean.
就像黛安娜·罗斯
Like Diana Ross.
挺适合你
That suits you.
我该谢谢你吗
Thanks?
你的确与众不同
You are something else.
瓦妮莎回来了 你还是走吧
There’s Vanessa. You’d better go.
怎么了
What? Why?
她讨厌我光坐着看电影
She hates when I sit around and I watch movies
却不干活
and I don’t contribute.
交给我吧
No, I’ll handle this.
我最擅长扑灭老妈的怒火了
I’m really good at defusing mom-type rage.
别 别 朱诺
No, no, Juno.
-说真的 -马克 你在哪
– Hey, seriously… – Hey, Mark, where are you?!
-我买♥♥了些东西 -瓦妮莎
– I got some stuff… – Hey, Vanessa.
-朱诺 出什么事了 -没事
– Juno. What’s going on? – Oh, nothing.
你怎么来了 出事了吗
What are you doing here? What’s wrong?
我今天去看医生了
I went to the doctor today.
孩子出事了吗
Is something wrong with the baby?
孩子很健康
The baby’s great.
一切正常
It’s the right size and everything.
我还看到手和脚了
I even saw its phalanges today.
你看
Here.
孩子在这
It’s a baby.
是你的孩子
It’s your baby.
就像在挥手呢
Kind of looks like it’s waving, you know.
好像在说
Like it’s saying,
“瓦妮莎 你愿意当我的妈妈吗”
“Hey, Vanessa, will you be my mom?”
的确有这种感觉
Oh, it kind of does.
你看吧
Right?
朱诺好心地把照片拿给我们看
Juno was nice enough to bring that over for us today.
肚皮上那玩意一擦干净我就赶来了
Yeah, I came as soon as I got that ultrasound goo off my pelvis.
说起来都觉得疯狂
It was crazy actually.
我继母奚落了那个超声技师
My stepmom verbally abused the ultrasound tech
我们就被赶出来了
and we got escorted off the premises.
你去洗劫商场了吗
What kind of swag did you score?
买♥♥上瘾了吧
Mall madness?
我不过是给孩子买♥♥了点东西
It’s just some stuff I picked up for the baby.
这些东西在庆生会上不是都会收到吗
Don’t you usually get all that stuff at like a baby shower?
我继母怀我妹妹的时候
‘Cause my stepmom, she was pregnant with my little sister,
就收到了一大堆礼物
and she got a million gifts, you know?
我不嫉妒
But I wasn’t jealous,
因为那些东西逊毙了
’cause they all super lame.
估计没人给我们办庆生会
I doubt anyone’s going to throw us a shower.
为什么他们不给你们办
Why wouldn’t they throw you a baby shower?
这种情况下
I don’t think people know
不知别人该作何感想
how to feel about the situation,
因为还没有最终定下来
because it’s not set in stone.
没定下来什么
What isn’t set?
不是吧 不是吧
No, no, no, no, no.
你不会以为我会临阵变卦吧
You don’t think that I’m going to flake out on you?
我没有 朱诺
No, I don’t, Juno.
只是我们之前经历过一次
We went through a situation before
最终没能成功
where it didn’t work out.
临阵退缩了
Yeah, cold feet.
你们真该去趟中国
You should have gone to China.
我听说那里送孩子跟玩似的
You know, ’cause I hear they give away babies like free iPods.
像T恤似的
You know,
比赛的时候放在枪里
they pretty much just put them in those T-shirt guns
朝观众席乱射
and shoot them out at sporting events.
你再不回家父母该担心了
Your parents are probably wondering where you are.
不会的 我都怀孕了
Nah. I mean, I’m already pregnant,
还能跟人乱搞不成
so what other kind of shenanigans could I get into?
但我也该走了
Though, I should… I should probably bounce.
别忘了你的包
Hey, don’t forget your bag.
对了 包
Oh, bag.
谢谢
Thank you.
保重
Okay, take care.
你去哪了 朱诺
Where the hell have you been, June bug?
我去了趟圣克芬德
I just drove to St. Cloud
给马克和瓦妮莎看超声照片
to show Mark and Vanessa the ultrasound.
在那待了几小时
I ended up staying for a couple hours.
几个小时
A couple hours?!
你怎么会想到那去
What are you going over there in the first place?
他们想多了解了解
Oh, they just… you know, they wanted to know about the stuff,
我答应会常联♥系♥ 就去了
and I said I’d keep them updated, so I did.
寄给他们不就行了
Well, you could have mailed it to them.
干嘛要开一个小时车去个偏远地方
Why would you drive an hour out to East Jesus Nowhere?
去都去了
I just did.