蠢蛋搞怪秀3D

he’s a good boy.
尽量避免任何突然的动作
Just don’t make any sudden movements.
避免跟它的眼神接触 萨姆森…
Don’t make eye contact with him. Samson…
我得拿我的鞭子
I’m getting my whip!
-喔 我的天啊 喔 我的天啊 -赶快逃啊
-Oh, my God! Oh, my God! -Get out of here!
-喔 我的天啊 喔 我的天啊 -快离开这
-Oh, my God! Oh, my God! -Get out of here!
喔天啊 喔 我的天啊 喔 我的天啊
Oh, God! Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
呜啊 呜啊 呜啊 萨姆森
Whoa, whoa, whoa, Samson!
天啊 刚那是啥
Jesus Christ. What the hell was that?
-那是驯兽师…-它来了 它出来了
-There’s a trainer… -It’s out! It’s out!
菲尔怎么了
What happened to Phil?
-驯兽师说会搞定的 -他说安静点
-The trainer will get him. -He said be quiet.
山姆 山姆
Sam, Sam…
喔 我的天啊 我从来没看过大猩猩
Oh, my God. I never saw a gorilla before.
-它是被驯服过的 -只是刚毁了整个房♥间
-He’s tame. -He just wrecked the whole room.
-有个天杀的驯兽师 -没啥大不了的
-There’s a fucking trainer. -Big deal!
-是不是有搞错什么啊 -可能喔
-Did this go wrong or something? -Kind of.
不然该怎样
What was supposed to happen?
-他像是一个训兽师…-喔 又怎样
-He’s like the trainer… -Oh, so what?
他看起来没事
He seems all right now.
这算是可以开玩笑的事吗
Was this supposed to be just fun or something?
他想回去那房♥间 你有那房♥间的钥匙吗
He wants to go back in the room. Do you have the key to that room?
-嗯 -钥匙给我
-Yeah. -Give me the key.
-给我钥匙 -我老公在里面耶
-Give me the key. -My husband’s in there somewhere.
菲尔还好吗 菲尔出来了吗
Is Phil OK? Is Phil out here?
-我勒操 -什么 他在哪
-I shit myself! -What? Where is he?
-我必须采取些手段了 干 -有只大猩猩耶
-I had to take a mean shit. -There’s a gorilla.
我知道 我必须采取些手段了 操 它跑了出来
I know. I had to take a mean shit. It was coming out.
听见吗 都是水水的 我必须大一下
Hear it? It’s all juicy. I had to do it.
-菲尔 你实在是很鸟耶 -我知道啦 没办法啊
-Phil, you are mingin’. -I know. I had to.
我需要这个 我不能呼吸 我需要这个
I need this thing off. I can’t breathe. I need this off.
那是一个人吗 干♥他♥♥娘♥的♥是人扮的
Is that a person? That’s a frickin’ person.
-是庞修斯啦 我♥操♥ -是人扮的吗
-It’s Pontius, dipshit! -Is that a person?
那是个…
Is that a…
喔 我的天啊 无法相信
Oh, my God! I can’t believe it!
你差点心脏病发吗
Did you almost have a heart attack?
喔 我的天啊
Oh, my God.
-真高兴你是假的 -欢迎来洛杉矶啊
-I’m so glad you’re fake. -Welcome to L.A.
菲尔在那拉屎啦
Phil’s in there shittin’.
-出…-刚把菲尔吓到拉屎
-Get… -It scared the shit out of Phil.
好啦
All right.
-赞喔 -接好 上 上
-That’s a good one. -Get it! Go! Go!
操♥他♥妈♥的勒
Holy shit!
哈啰 我是 约翰尼·诺克斯维尔
Hello, my name is Johnny Knoxville,
今天我是个隐形人
and today I’m an Invisible Man.
好了吗
You ready?
好了
OK.
再绕一圈啦
Take him around again.
我还是隐形的吗
Am I still invisible?
我不喜欢他们这样做
I hate when they do that.
干我的勒
Fuck me.
诺克斯维尔去哪啦
Where’d Knoxville go?
在前面啊
He’s up ahead.
距离近吗 喔干
Is he close? Oh, fuck!
打开闸门
Open the gate!
这真是他妈的疯了
That was fucking insane.
-他跌惨了 -他刚刚真的有摔了一下
-No, he landed bad. -He really fell a little bit there.
-喔天啊 -还好吧 约翰尼
-Oh, Jesus. -You OK, Johnny?
老兄 刚那下完全的摔在脖子上
Dude, that was a total neck-breaker.
我觉得他的头碰了一声
I think it jarred his head.
-有拍道吗 -喔有啦 老兄
-Get the money shot? -Oh, yeah, dude.
看看在树上的脚痕
Look at the feet mark on top of the tree.
耶 看一下…
Yeah, look it…
-我飞了起来 喔耶 -嗯 你有
-I got ups. Oh, yeah. -Yeah, you did.
-你飞过了彩虹 -我飞过了彩虹
-You were over the rainbow. -I was over the rainbow.
在这台拖车里 有一层假的地板
So, in this trailer, we have a false floor
还有我们挖的一英尺深的坑
with an 1 1-foot-deep pit we dug
里面塞了几只橡胶蛇
and filled with rubber snakes.
巴姆觉得自己会阴了杰夫
And Bam thinks he’s gonna be doing a prank on Jeff,
他坐在拖车前
who’s sitting in front of the trailer.
当他阴了杰夫时 他将掉进那个坑 而且…
But he’s gonna be falling into that pit, and when he does,
戴维·韦瑟斯先生…
Mr. David Weathers…
…会拿出几百只活生生的蛇丢进那个坑里
…has a few hundred live snakes we’re gonna throw in there with him.
巴姆真的很讨厌蛇
Bam really hates snakes, too.
巴姆很有可能会第一次在电影里哭出来
This may be the first time Bam cries in the film.
-准备好了吗 -嗯
-You ready? -Yeah.
-好滴 -你要…
-All right. -You want to…?
屈里曼在一个很难防守的地方
Tremaine’s in a very vulnerable spot.
现在是进行”洛基(罗基)”的好时机
I think it’s time for Rocky.
我相信这将是 洛基4
I think it’s Rocky 4, I believe.
不管怎样 他的脸即将挨揍了
Either way, he’s getting punched in the face.
安静点
Be quiet.
喔干
Oh, fuck!
干 操的勒
Fucking fuck.
不
No!
它们是真的吗 干♥你♥妈♥的把我弄出去
Are they real? Get me the fuck out of here.
干♥你♥妈♥的 老兄 把我弄出去
You cocksuckers. Dude, get me out, man.
-这又不是真的 老兄 -发生啥事
-They’re not real, dude. -What happened?
-我想出去啦 -巴姆 巴姆
-I want out, man. -Bam. Bam.
什么 什么 别这样搞我啊
What, what?! Don’t do this to me!
唷 真的啦 把我弄出去
Yo, seriously, get me out!
干♥你♥妈♥的现在把我给弄出去
Get me the fuck out now!
现在 把我给弄出去
Now! Get me out now!
老兄 停 停 停
Dude, stop, stop, stop!
喔 天啊 这次我认输了
Oh, Jesus. I’m stepping back for this one.
老兄 别再搞我了
Dude, stop fucking with me!
-嘿 巴姆 -我♥操♥你♥妈♥的♥恨透你们
-Hey, Bam. -Dude, I fucking hate you guys.
-迪米特里 拜托 拜托啦 -他哭了吗
-Dimitry, please! Please! -Is he crying?
-拜托 拜托啦 -他真的哭了出来
-Please! Please! -He’s really crying.
屈里曼 我勒干♥你♥娘♥ 把我弄出来
Tremaine, you motherfucker! Get me out now!
不好玩啦 这又不好玩
It’s not funny. It’s not funny!
不好玩 这次我会跟你闹翻 巴姆
It’s not funny? I’m gonna argue with you on that one, Bam.
你们这些屎人
You fucking assholes!
-把他弄出来 -弄我出来
-Get him out. -Get me out.
把我弄出来
Get me out.
你不能这样对我
You can’t do that to me, man.
抱歉啦 兄弟
Sorry, bud.
老兄 这是我能想像最恐怖的
Dude, that is the worst fear I could ever imagine.
干♥你♥娘♥ 我♥操♥你♥妈♥的♥B 干♥你♥个屎蛋
You fucking, dick-sucking, fucking, asshole
干♥你♥娘♥ 你这样弄我
motherfuckers just did that to me.
有只蛇在他背上
Look at the snake tracks on his back.
你背上有个蛇的标记耶
You have snake marks on your back.
-喔 我的天啊 -那只好大
-Oh, my God. -That one is so big!
那里像是地狱
That looks like hell in there.
真是干♥他♥妈的恐怖 我无法想像有什么…
That was fucking terrifying. I can’t think of anything more terrifying
…比这更恐怖 刚就这样发生了
than that, that just happened right now.
不客气啦
Well, you’re welcome, man.
操♥你♥妈♥的
Fucking cocksucker.
你的声音绝对变得不太一样
Your voice definitely did have different nuances to it
当你失控的喊出”把我弄出去”
when you were hollering out for… getting out of there.
别弄了
Stop it, man!
干 你差点让我心脏病发…说真的…
Fuck, man! You’re gonna make me have heart… Seriously…
感谢神 三点我就可以走了 我还在倒数计时呢
Thank God I’m leaving at three today. I am counting down the minutes.
说真的 干♥他♥妈的戴维·韦瑟斯
Seriously. With fucking David Weathers around.
我来看看有没有早一个小时的航♥班♥
I’m gonna see if there’s a one-hour-earlier flight.
大多数人不喜欢这烂主意
Most people don’t like the idea of being covered in dog shit,
但这并不会比下面那些还令人讨厌 例如…
but that doesn’t bother me nearly as much as, like,
云霄飞车 及 高空弹跳
rollercoasters and bungee jumping.
我就是无法干那些事
I just can’t do that shit, man.
所以接下来应该会非常的…美妙
That’s why this is gonna be fantastic.
基本上这像是在坐带着屎尿的云霄飞车