蠢蛋搞怪秀3D

No, you’re not, Grandpa. You’re the best.
-欧文 -对不起宝贝
-Irving! -Sorry, baby.
抱歉
Sorry.
对不起 老兄 对不起
Sorry, man, sorry.
不好意思 阿宅 可以帮我们拍张照吗
Excuse me, homeboy, can you take our picture?
-不好意思打扰了 -没关系
-I’m sorry to bother you. -No problem.
实在是…
I’m so…
不好意思 谢谢 老兄Ok
Sorry. Thank you, buddy. OK?
-知道吗 我会试着无视的 -你只要按那个按钮就好
-You know what? I’m gonna pass. -You just hit the button there.
我会试着当作没看见的 你是不是未成年
I’m going to pass on that. Are you underage?
不 她是我的孙女 她已经成年了 19岁
No. This is my granddaughter. She’s of age. She’s 19.
先生 你不该那样亲你的孙女
Sir, you shouldn’t be kissing your granddaughter,
还有那样拍你孙女的屁♥股♥
slapping your granddaughter’s ass like that, sir.
-她成年了啦 -你可以在牢里再干那些事
-She’s of age. -You can go to jail for that.
我没有…我试着…你应该为自己感到羞愧
I don’t… I’m trying. You ought to be ashamed of yourself.
你不该对你的孙女这样做
You shouldn’t be doing that to your granddaughter.
-你在做什么啊 -老婆 我根本就不认识他啊
-What are you doing? -Honey, I don’t even know this man.
我才不管哩 你上了你的孙女耶 糟糕透顶
I don’t care. You’re with your granddaughter. That’s terrible!
-我从来没看过这种事…-这是我老婆
-I’ve never seen anything like it… -This is my wife.
-这是你老婆 -是的 老婆 我对不起你
-This is your wife? -Yes. Honey, I’m sorry.
别吵了 今晚回家再说 Ok 别吵了
Don’t bother coming home tonight! OK? Don’t bother.
老婆 夭寿 天啊
Honey! God. Jesus.
-你怎么会…-别跟她讲话
-Why would you…? -Go talk to her.
不好意思 这是我自己的问题
Excuse me. I have my own problems.
老婆啊
Honey!
现在是来看看音乐能否安抚野兽的时候了
It’s time to find out if music calms the wild beast.
我是 赖安·邓恩 这是 拉姆·詹姆斯
I’m Ryan Dunn, and this is the Ram Jam.
安抚
Soothing?
喔天啊 喔天啊
Oh, boy. Oh, boy.
它已经盯着我了耶
He’s already looking at me.
你可以先去那里 等我进去那吗 老兄 天啊
Can you just go over there until I get in here, buddy? Jesus.
最好快点 它盯着我…
You better hurry up. He’s looking at me.
它看起来颇陶醉啊
He looks beguiled.
它应该是在想”这些人是智障吗”
He’s like, “Are these guys stupid?”
-它不太喜欢现在看到的 -嘿 小宝贝儿
-He doesn’t like what he sees, though. -Hey, little baby.
赞啦
That was good.
-演奏些音乐 演奏些音乐 -你就完了
-Play some music! Play some music! -You’re toast.
-斯蒂沃 帮帮他啦 -吹点啥的出来啊
-Steve-O, help him! -Play some music!
斯蒂沃 帮帮他啊
Steve-O, help him!
引过来啊 邓恩
Get it over here, Dunn!
帮他 斯蒂沃
Go help him, Steve-O!
-救救你的兄弟 -帮他 斯蒂沃
-Save your bro! -Help him, Steve-O!
-吹啊 -斯蒂沃
-Play! -Steve-O!
吹♥喇♥叭♥
Play the trumpet!
-耶 就是这样 -剩你了 斯蒂沃
-Yeah, there you go. -Just you, Steve-O.
说不定我们用错乐器了
Maybe we used the wrong instruments.
那你认为音乐可以安抚野兽吗
So you think music calmed the wild beast?
完全不行啊 老兄 完全不行
Not at all, man, not at all.
我也觉得不行
I don’t think so, either.
开始吧
Here we go.
你们看起来像白♥痴♥
You guys look like idiots.
好了吗
Ready?
前面当心噜
Fore!
-你还好吧 -嗯
-You all right? -Yeah.
-打中脖子吗 -嗯
-Did you take it in the neck? -Yeah.
喔 我的天啊 老兄
Oh, my God, dude!
你打中了喉结
You took it in the Adam’s apple.
-嗨 斯派克 -厄尔文·麦克格海伊 特拉维斯
-Hi, Spike. -Ehren McGhehey. Travis Bickle.
-他有颗我们需要的牙齿 -我需要它
-He’s got a tooth that we need out. -I need it out.
我需要它是因为你需要它 而你需要的我都需要
I need it because you need it. Whatever you need, I need.
来拔牙齿吧 把它弄出来
-Let’s get it out. -We need it together.
不是说说而已 要说到做到啦
You wanna walk the walk, you gotta talk the talk,
不然没人会把你当一回事
or no one will take you seriously.
庞修斯医生 邓恩医生
Dr. Pontius? Dr. Dunn?
-我们真的能这样做吗 -终于啊
-Can we do this? -Finally!
把他绑好 上吧
Tie him up and let’s do it.
坐下
Sit down.
轻松点
Relax.
-放松点 -放轻松
-Take it easy. -Relax.
你知道这是怎么一回事吗
You know why this happened.
好好使用牙线跟刷牙是一样重要的
Flossing is just as important as brushing.
所以我们现在要把厄尔文的烂牙给搞好
So what we’re going to do is extract Ehren’s crooked tooth
然后重新把它植好 像大树一样
and then we’re gonna replant it, just like you would a tree.
-直直直 -超级直
-But straight. -But straight.
我是 危险的厄尔文 这是 兰博基尼拉齿
I’m Danger Ehren, and this is the Lamborghini Tooth Pull.
好消息是 你正在搞的十分愚蠢
Here’s the good news: What you’re doing is stupid.
所以你只能继续弄下去
So you got that going.
上去那辆蓝宝坚尼啦 傻屌♥
Get in the Lambo, shitbird!
这应该会很烂
This is gonna suck.
这主意是你的理发师告诉你的吗
Did your barber tell you to do this?
他看起来一定像獐头鼠目
He seems like he’s full of bad ideas.
你还在火上加油
Are you stoked?
这是蓝宝坚尼耶
It’s a Lamborghini.
听看看这声音
Listen to that thing.
-张大你的双眼 -看看它性感的尾椎
-Open your eyes wide. -Look at that bad-ass Lamborghini.
耶
Yeah!
天啊
God!
-准备冲了喔 -干看到鬼
-Way to go! -Fuckin’ deuce!
胜利啊
Victory.
我可以说刚那下没很烂
I wish I could say that didn’t suck.
-喔 我的天啊 -你看起来糟透了
-Oh, my God! -You look terrible!
这样够了吗 够了吗 痛死我也
Is it gone? Is it gone? It hurt!
-喔 我的天啊 -你干的不错啊
-Oh, my God! -You did good.
干的不错 还不赖啦
You did good. You did good.
干 说真的实在有够痛
Man, that hurt me. Not really.
让我看看 厄尔文
Let me see, Ehren.
-现在有什么感觉 -我痛得像…
-What’d it feel like? -It hurt like a…
-像啥 -不知道
-What was that? -I don’t know.
啥啊…你在哭吗
What… Are you crying?
你们”正在”拔了我的牙…
You’re pulling my tooth.
我们是”已经拔过”你的牙 而不是”正在拔了”你的牙
We already pulled your tooth. We’re not “pulling” your tooth.
我们是”已经拔过”你的牙 而不是”正在拔了”你的牙
We already pulled your tooth. We’re not “pulling” your tooth.
牙已经被拔掉噜
The tooth is officially pulled.
厄尔文 记得我说过要帮你重新植牙吗
Ehren, remember how I said I could replant the tooth?
-嗯 -我唬烂你的
-Yeah. -That story wasn’t true.
抱歉啊
I’m sorry.
-喔 我的天啊 -就只是唬你的
-Oh, my God. -It was a story.
我们只是试图让你建立点信心
We were trying to build up your confidence.
好痛啊
That hurts.
这里这么多医生…牙医…
A lot of doctors… dentists…
我不认为他们是真的医生耶
I don’t really consider them real doctors.
他们以为自己是神 你知道吗 不是我
They think they’re God, you know? Not me.
撒旦
Satan.
耶 他湿了
Yeah, he’s soaked.
我♥干♥♥你♥个…
You fucking…
你到底有多少尿啊
How much piss do you have?!
兄弟们 我说过我喝了一整打耶
Dudes, I’m telling you, I drank a dozen of them things.
我必须说是屈里曼要我这么做的
All I got to say is, Tremaine told me to do this.
AP和菲尔刚到达洛杉矶
Ap and Phil just arrived in Los Angeles.
只要他们一办好住宿登记
As soon as they check in their hotel room,
将会有一只大猩猩等着他们 又名 克里斯·庞修斯
there’s gonna be a gorilla in there, aka Chris Pontius,
旁边是驯兽师威尔 会试着驯服它
and the trainer here, Will, who’s gonna try to tame him
但会出现严重事态
but it’s gonna go horribly wrong.
基本上 啥鸟事情都可能会发生
Basically, all hell’s gonna break loose.
将会是一场血腥的狂欢派对
It’s gonna be a blood orgy.
我的老天
My goodness.
喔 我的天啊 喔 我的天啊
Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
不 不 不 不 没关系的 这是萨姆森
No, no, no, no! It’s OK! This is Samson.
尽量跟它避开眼神接触 萨姆森 坐下 安静
Just don’t make eye contact. Samson, down. Be quiet.
它是一个好男孩 如果它想当个好男孩
He’s a good boy. If he wants to be a good boy,
它是一个好男孩