蠢蛋搞怪秀3D

…两部电影 因为
…two movies, because
我从来没这样搞过
I never really did squats or anything then,
现在才发现我的屁♥股♥跟大腿是用来…
but now I’ve been really working out my butt and legs,
给狗咬的…
and it gave the dog something to bite on.
如果你问我的话 被咬的感觉还不赖啊
Pretty good something to bite on, if you ask me.
耶
Yeah.
我是 克里斯·庞修斯 这是Helicockter
I’m Chris Pontius, and this is the Helicockter.
喔不 飞起来了
Oh, no, you’re flying it.
耶
Yeah!
-减速啊 减速啊 -减速啊
-Throttle back, throttle back! -Throttle back!
减速啊 减速啊
Throttle back. Throttle back.
喔天啊
Oh, God!
好吧 为了我的航♥空♥事业
Well, so much for my aviation career.
喔天啊 为了我的生活
Oh, God. So much for my love life.
唷 诺瓦克
Yo, Novak.
-喔 我的天啊 -干♥你♥娘♥哩
-Oh, my God! -Holy fuck!
喔 我的天啊
Oh, my God!
-你还好吧 -喔 我的天啊
-Are you all right? -Oh, my God!
刚那下实在是爽到出水
Dude, you have no idea how fucking perfect that was.
拉我一下 不 不是那样
Help me up. No, not that way.
老兄 我们来看看
Dude, we gotta see that shit.
刚那下实在有够猛 我的脸…
Dude, it hit so fucking hard, my face…
-这是煞车制动器 -看看这焊接
-That’s the brake. -Look at the weld.
-希望它够坚固 -速度快吗
-I’ve had stronger silverware. -How fast does it go?
这老古董蛮快的
It’s kind of fast for being as cruddy as they are.
-你们觉得他能办到 -他一定能办到啦
-So you’re saying he might make it. -He’ll definitely make it.
-老兄 你真给力 -这没啥
-Dude, you got this. -Nothing.
没啥啦
Nothing.
摩托车飞人特技 你最远飞过多远
What’s the furthest you’ve jumped a motorcycle before?
我没玩过摩托车飞人…
I haven’t jumped a motorcycle.
-那这将是你的纪录 -耶 我快打破纪录了
-So this will be your record. -Yeah. I’m breaking records.
这是充满希望的 斯内克河的救赎
I’m doing the Snake River Redemption and, hopefully,
如果按计划进行 这里将有一道彩虹
if all goes as planned, I will create a perfect rainbow,
最后还有小子的金壶
ending up in Wee Man’s pot of gold.
或许没有小子
Or on Wee Man.
不管怎样
-Either way. -Either way works.
至少你飞起来时像一片微坡培根
At least your run-up ramp looks like a piece of microwave bacon.
上坡
Uphill!
一片很爱国的…微坡培根
A very patriotic, microwave bacon.
瞄准那只该死的小妖精
Just aim for the fucking leprechaun.
我会试着搞定小妖精的
I’m gonna try and take out the leprechaun.
-降落在他的金壶 -偷光他的金子
-Land in the gold. -Steal his gold.
随便啦 让我们来干个翻天地覆吧
Whatever. Let’s fucking get it over with and go have some fucking tacos!
操
Shit!
-干 耶 -你还好吧
-Fuck yeah! -You all right?
没事吧
You OK?
邓恩摔倒了
We got a Dunn down!
做得好啊
You done good!
干♥他♥妈的真猛
That was fucking awesome.
赞啊 邓恩
That was awesome, Dunn!
老兄 刚那下实在是有够疯狂的
Dude, that thing is squirrelly as shit!
超炫的啦
That was so amazing!
这时应该要来个慢动作重播的
I think it’s time for a Wee Man’s Chronic Taco replay.
出来跑的总是要还的
Redemption is made!
我是 普雷斯顿·莱西 这是APple of My Ass
I’m Preston Lacy, and this is the Apple of My Ass.
-要我把他塞进去吗 -塞进去啦
-Want me to put it in, P? -Put her in.
帮我一下
Help me out, O.
-苹果勒 -在我这
-What about the apple? -I got it.
-塞在里面好吗 -我觉得不错啊
-Is it in there pretty good? -I think so. I think so.
-再深点儿 -找方法弄好点
-A little deeper. -I can make it fit way better.
-再深点 -啥
-A little deeper. -What?
-打开 我把它塞进去 -就是这样 爽啊
-Hold it open, I’ll put it in. -There we go. That’s in good.
-喔 斯蒂沃 -我的卵蛋
-Oh, Steve-O. -My balls.
撑着点
Hold on.
你不喜欢苹果屁♥股♥或花生屁♥股♥
You don’t like apple and peanut butter?
-鲍勃拿来吧 -来吧 鲍勃
-Bring in Bob. -Come on, Bob!
喔 鲍勃别拿进来
Oh, don’t bring in Bob.
-上啊 鲍勃 -喔 我的天啊
-Come on, Bob. -Oh, my God.
-就这样给它乔下去 -来啊 鲍勃
-Make him work for it. -Come on, Bob.
-可怜的 鲍勃 -上啊 鲍勃
-Poor Bob. -Come on, Bob.
-去啊 鲍勃 -它在闻耶
-Get it, Bob. -He smells.
来啊 鲍比 鲍勃-鲍勃 鲍勃-鲍勃
Come on, Bobby. Bob-Bob. Bob-Bob.
-禁忌的果实 -上啊 鲍勃
-The old forbidden fruit. -Come on, Bob.
-在庭院用餐 -来啊 鲍勃
-The Garden of Eatin’. -Come on, Bob!
咬紧 咬紧
Grip it, grip it.
鲍勃．
Bob.
它真的从屁♥眼♥进去耶
He really got in there.
喔 想再来一次
Oh, he’s going back for more.
别动 再来一次
Don’t move. He’s going back for more.
赞啊 宝贝
Good, baby.
放进去好吗 Ok
Put it back in there? OK.
-那是鲍勃 -喔老兄
-Is that Bob? -Oh, man.
进去了
It’s in there!
那东西还在里面啊 再去趴好
It’s still in there! Get back down there!
回去趴好 还在里面啊
Get back down. It’s still in.
喔不 喔不 喔不
Oh, no! Oh, no! Oh, no!
-可以拿掉吗 -那颗苹果还在你屁♥眼♥里吗
-Can I move this? -Still have an apple in your ass?
拿出来吧
Got it out.
为啥你要那样做杰夫
Why did you do that, Jeff?
看吧鲍勃 我告诉过你参与电影拍摄没那么难
See, Bob? I told you it’s not that hard to get into a movie.
-有拍到吗 -喔不
-You got it? -Oh, no!
我在整理我的新发型耶
I was checking out my new haircut in the mirror.
我在跟小子聊天 然后就听到…
I was talking to Wee Man over there, then I heard a…
我是指”发生啥事””我当然知道刚发生啥事”
I’m like, “What was that?” “I know what that was.”
我的鼻子好像受伤了
Kinda hurt my nose.
像是一种感觉 一种直冲脑门的感觉
It’s like way, way up in my brain.
我们正在进行 猎鸭
Me and the boys are about to do a little Duck Hunting.
-放 -喔 操
-Pull! -Oh, shit!
你们还好吧
You guys all right?
-安迪怎么了 -他整个被♥干♥翻了
-What did Andy do? -He got fucked up.
-结束了 -不知道耶 当我们跳起来…
-Our timing was off. -I don’t know. When we jumped,
我在他下面 他在我上面 然后他就降落在我身上了
somehow I got under him, he got on top of me, and he landed on me.
他的头撞了我一下
His head smashed me.
-我在发抖 -好痛啊
-I’m shaking. -It hurt so bad.
-我也被击中了 -看起来有够白♥痴♥
-Got hit too. -That looked hilarious.
现在换帕克斯上了
Now it’s Parks’s turn,
这只鸭子似乎很肥耶
and this duck’s got a little more meat on him.
放
Pull!
我们干翻他了 喔 我的天啊
We lit him the fuck up. Oh, my God!
我受伤了
I got welted.
就像直接掉进蜂巢里
It’s like fuckin’ falling into a bees’nest.
-天啊 -我们杀了鸭鸭
-Holy crap! -We killed Quack Quack.
-我背上整个都刺刺的 -真的吗
-My whole back stings. -Does it?
嗯 大概十 十一处吧 还有那里
Yeah, ten, 11 right there, and that one.
好吧我们重新上膛 换邓恩上阵
All right. So let’s reload. Get Dunn on there.
下一轮似乎是邓恩 准备好了吗
Looks like Dunn’s up next. Ready, C-sucker?
这次铁定很惨烈
This one’s a gobbler for sure.
放
Pull!
干 神啊
Good fucking God!
不得不说 保罗·班扬这个四十尺翻滚实在有够赞
I gotta give it to Paul Bunyan’s 40-foot fucking cartwheel.
巴克为经典科幻影集主角
看起来像巴克穿越了时空啊
You look like Buck Rogers going through time, you know.
感觉像在空中飞了两星期那么久
Yeah, I felt like I was in the air for a fortnight.
喔 我的天啊
Oh, my God.
跳起来
Jump out!
我告诉过你 我会搞定它
I told you I was gonna fucking clear it.
刚就是这样了 不是吗
That fucking just happened, didn’t it?
哈啰 我是欧文·齐斯曼
Hello. My name is Irving Zisman.
这是我妻子与孙女
This is my wife and granddaughter,
今天我是一个坏爷爷
and today I’m a Really Bad Grandpa.
不是啦 你是最赞的爷爷