猪头逛大街（2004）

Okay, it’s official. We’ve entered the Twilight Zone.
这个很正式啊 我们已经迷失了
Dude, Liane is fucking hot. She’s not ugly.
帅哥 利安太他妈的火爆了 她一点也不丑
Here you go, boys.
这个给你们
Thank you. Thanks a lot.
谢谢你 非常谢谢
Liane, how are things between you and Freakshow presently?
利安 你现在和富莱克舍尔关系怎么样?
Oh! They’ve never been better. We love each other so much.
哦! 没有比现在更好的了 我们是如此的深爱着对方
I was just wondering, how does a guy like Freakshow…
我刚才一直在想 一个长得像富莱克舍尔这样的人怎么会…
…end up with a girl like you?
…和像你这样的女孩结合在一切呢?
Well, we met at choir practice about four years ago.
哦 我们大概是四年前在 唱诗培训班认识的
Freakshow was really shy back then, you know,
富莱克舍尔 那时候非常的害羞 你们知道的
’cause of all his hideous boils on his face and neck.
就是因为他那些长在脸上 和脖子上的可怕的疖子
Sure, sure.
当然 那当然
But he had the most amazing voice,
但是他有最不可思议的声音
Iike a baby canary.
Iike a baby canary. 就像一只小金丝雀一般
The devil is everywhere
The devil is everywhere
Hey, Randy, what, the devil, huh
Hey Randy what the devil huh
The devil is everywhere
The devil is everywhere
Hey, Randy, what
Hey Randy what
After Easter service one day, I told him how much I loved his solo
复活节那天 我告诉他我很喜欢听他唱歌♥
and he finally mustered up the courage to ask me out.
之后他终于鼓起了勇气约我出去
We’ve been in love ever since.
从那以后我就相爱了
So, are you boys gonna fuck me now or what?
那么 你们俩打算操♥我♥还是?
Rock, paper, scissors to see who goes first. Ready?
石头 剪刀 布来决定谁先 准备好了?
Rock, paper Wait a second.
石头 剪刀 等一下
What about Freakshow?
富莱克舍尔怎么办?
What? You assume we don’t know how to have a good time?
什么?你是说我们不知道怎么玩?
I just…
我只是…
Never mind. Rock, paper, scissors.
别介意.石头 剪刀 布
Sorry, but if you boys want me, you have to do me at the same time.
抱歉 如果你们想要我 你们一定要同时干我
Huh? Come on, give me the double stuff.
是吗? 来吧 两个都给我
I’m not sure we quite understand, Liane.
我想我们不是非常明白 莉安
I want you both inside me simultaneously.
我想你们两个同时进入我的身体
One hole or two? Whatever you want.
一个洞还是两个洞? 随便你们
Sorry. No, thank you. No, thank you.
抱歉.不行 谢谢 不行.谢谢
Dude, if it’s two holes,
哥们 如果是两个洞的话也许不会很糟
Shotgun anus. Forget it!
肛♥门♥鸟枪. 别提了!
I don’t want our balls rubbing against each other.
我不想我们两个的蛋蛋之间蹭来蹭去的
What, are you kidding? No way! Forget it.
什么?你在开玩笑? 不行!别提了.
How about blow jobs? Can we have blow jobs?
吹♥箫♥怎么样? 可以吹♥箫♥吗?
Well, okay.
呃 可以
Come here.
来吧
Okay. I’m going up there.
好吧 我去了
I wanna come, too.
我也想去
Think you could help me with this? You need help?
我想你可以帮我解决这个 你要帮忙?
Okay, yeah. It’s a little sticky there.
好的 有点紧
You can do it. Okay.
你行的 好吧
I can do it. I can do it.
我能做到的 我能做到的
Do you wanna play with them?
你想玩他们吗?
Play with them.
玩他们
Yeah, let’s do that.
是的 我们开始玩 好的
Let’s do that.
我们开始玩
Well, boys, I fixed your tire.
孩子们 我修好了你们的轮胎
Hi, honey.
嗨 宝贝.
What in the hell are you doing with my wife?
你们到底在对我老婆做什么?
You said outside that we could have sex with her.
你刚才在外面说我们可以和他性♥交♥.
Shit! Shit!
狗屁!狗屁!
I most certainly did not. Yeah, you did.
我肯定没有说过 你有说过
I did not! You did.
我没有! 你有.
Oh, no, I didn’t!
不 我没有 你说了 你说了.
You sure? You said it.
你确信? 你说过的.
My mistake!
我的错!
Freakshow.
富莱克舍尔
Well, since we’re all here…
呃 既然我们都在这里…
…how about a foursome?
玩4P如何?
Who wants the first reach-around?
谁想第一个和我互爽的?
Okay, let’s agree to never talk about what just happened.
好吧 我们约定永远不提刚才发生的事
Agreed.
同意
That’s a very good idea.
这个想法真不错
Dude, I have no idea
哥们 我不知道我们到底在那.
What?
什么?
Is that a hitchhiker? What the hell?
那是搭便车的吗? 见鬼 什么?
Should we pick him up? And get chopped to bits? Are you crazy?
我们该搭他上来吗? 然后把我们砍成碎片? 你疯了?
You know what? We’re lost. He may know how to get back on the highway.
你知道吗?我们迷路了. 他或许知道怎么回到高速公路.
Get back on the road. This is my car.
回到公路上.这是我的车.
We are not picking up a hitchhiker, man.
我们不能载一个搭便车的人.
Hey, guys, thanks for picking me up.
嗨 伙计 谢谢你搭我上车
Excuse me,
抱歉 你是尼尔·帕特里克·哈里斯?
Yep.
没错
Oh, my God, what are you doing here? Holy shit.
哦 我的上帝 你在这做什么? 见鬼
Dude, Doogie Howser M.D. was, like, my favorite show growing up.
哥们 妙手少年是我成长中最喜欢的电视剧
You were my idol.
你是我的偶像
That’s great. Could we get going? I’m bored as shit back here.
很好.我们可以走了吗? 我已经郁闷的快臭了
Go, go. Let’s go. This is a frickin’ boring spot.
开路 开路 我们走 这地方真♥他♥妈♥的郁闷
So I gotta ask you, Neil,
尼尔 我想问你
did you ever get it on with Wanda off the set?
你和旺达在现实中有过性关系吗?
Dude, I humped every piece of ass ever on that show.
哥们 那部电视剧里面的每个妞我都干过
Even the chick who played the hot nurse?
那个很性感的护士也包括?
No. I didn’t go all the way with her.
不 我和她关系没那么深
Neil, you wouldn’t happen to know
尼尔 你不会不知道…
how to get on the highway from here, would you?
…怎么进入高速公路 对吗?
Dude, I don’t even know
哥们 我甚至不知道我他妈的在什么地方
I was at this party earlier tonight
今晚我本是去参加派对的
and some guy hooked me up with this incredible X.
结果一些家伙让我陷入了这难以置信的幻觉中
The next thing I know, I’m being thrown out of a moving car.
我只知道 我被扔出了一辆行驶中的汽车
I’ve been tripping balls ever since. That’s crazy, dude.
然后我就在幻觉中的舞会活到现在 那真疯狂 哥们
We’ve been having a pretty crazy night, too.
我们今晚也同样很疯狂.
We’ve just been driving around looking for White Castle,
我们只是为了开车去找白色城♥堡♥
but we keep getting sidetracked.
但我们总是碰到其他事情
Yeah, dude, you fascinate me.
哥们 你让我着迷了
Forget White Castle. Let’s go get some pussy.
别提白色城♥堡♥了 我去找些妞
Huh? It’s a fuckin’ sausagefest in here.
是吗? 那他妈的有香肠节
Let’s get us some poontang. Then we’ll go to White Castle.
让我们去找些小B 然后我们再去白色城♥堡♥
No, Neil, you don’t understand.
不 尼尔 你无法明白的
We’ve been craving these burgers all night.
我们整晚都在想这些夹肉饼
Yeah, I’ve been craving burgers, too–fur burgers.
是的 我也一直都在想肉饼–带皮的那种
Come on, dudes, let’s pick up some trim at a strip club.
来吧 哥们 我们去脱衣舞俱乐部 找些漂亮的小B
The Doogie line always works on strippers.
聪明鼠的诗句大都与脱衣舞有关
Lap dance.
腿上舞蹈
There’s a gas station. I’m gonna see if we can get directions.
这有个加油站 我打算去看看 能不能了解到方位
We don’t need…
我们不必…
Hurry up, dudes, hurry up. I’m losing wood.
快点 哥们 快点. 我兴奋的小♥弟♥弟♥要离我而去了
Hurry, hurry, hurry, hurry, hurry, hurry.
快点 快点 快点 快点
Chill. We’ll be right back, Neil.
冷静些 我们马上回来 尼尔
We’ll be back.
我们会回来的
What’s the deal with Neil Patrick Harris? Why is he so horny?
尼尔·帕特里克·哈里斯怎么回事? 他怎么会那么性冲动?
I don’t know, but we can’t
我不知道 但是我们不能让他 妨碍了我们的需求
Oh, God.
哦 上帝 狗屎 又是这些阿飞
Late-night Math League meeting, homos?
深夜数学♥联♥盟? 同志?
Extreme!
高难度!
Let’s go.
开路
No, no.
别 别. 钱 钱–不要
Dude, what is that?
哥们 那是什么? 翼龙?
I do not knowwhat that is.
我不知道那是什么
That was extreme, dude!
那可是高难度 哥们!
Excuse me, can you tell us how to get to the highway from here?
抱歉 能告诉我们怎么去高速公路吗?
Dude, I got this.
哥们 我知道了
Dude, who knew learning Hindi would actually pay off?
哥们 谁知道学北印度方言会这么有用?
Guy says the highway is, like, a couple traffic lights from here.
这家伙说高速公路过几个红绿灯就到了.
We should be in Cherry Hill in ten minutes.
我们10分钟后就能到切瑞山
Ready? One, two, three! No. No.
准备好了? 一 二 三! 不 不要