但我想你可能太多的地窖*.
but I think you might be playing too much Dungeons & Dragons.
千真万确,煎.
You’re absolutely right, Fry.
我快疯了,但这个诚实的说,
I almost went insane, but after this heart-to-heart talk,
我决定辞职.-真的吗?
I’ve decided to quit. – Really?
哇!如释重负我蟾蜍.
Whew! That’s a load off my toad.
现在,失陪.
Now, if you’ll excuse me.
我要去杀死狼人的小妖精山.
I’m off to slay the werewolf of Goblin Mountain.
警惕的,man-wench!
On guard, man-wench!
准备过冰刀.
Prepare to cross blades.
你买♥♥不起的,亲爱的.
You couldn’t afford it, honey.
愚蠢,妖精,我把你的名义的男人.
Foolish leprechaun, I scoop your treasure in the name of the fancy men.
他还堆宝藏在客厅地毯.
He also left a small pile of treasure on the living room rug.
犯规,见到你了.
Foul dragon, meet thy doom.
你想,医生?-谢谢.
Would you like a napkin, Doctor? – Thank you.
满意了吧,zoidberg吗?我和我父母就好了.
Satisfied, Zoidberg? My relationship with my parents is fine.
现在,等等,莉拉.也许这折磨你的项圈.
Now, hold on, Leela. Maybe this torture collar is good for you.
什么?噢!
What? Ow!
它会控制你的情绪.
It’ll control your temper.
男人喜欢一个女人总是很脑袋车门了.
Men like a woman who’s not always slamming their head in the car door.
她是对的.那是最吸引我的母亲.
She’s right. That’s what first attracted me to your mother.
那么,莉拉,我明白你的朋友是个内科医生,
So, Leela, I understand your friend here is a physician,
我没看到戒指他爪.
and I’m not seeing a ring on his claw.
妈妈,他是个蟑螂从外太空.
Mom, he’s a cockroach from outer space.
好,莉拉,愤怒的工作.
Good, Leela, work that anger out.
失陪一下,我和那些人群殴寄生虫.
Excuse me a moment, I’m swarming with parasites.
嘿,这是谁的表面.
Hey, it’s what’s-his-name from the surface.
那bi-clops的.
The bi-clops.
你看见班德?他疯了.还有,闻闻牛奶.
Have you seen Bender? He’s gone nuts. Also, smell this milk.
准备突袭的.
Prepare for a surprise attack.
有人做.
Someone do something.
我会的,但是…噢!带我去.
I would, but… Ow! Take my collar off.
我不能,我还在吃.
I can’t, I’m still eating.
帮我,莉拉.
Help me, Leela.
我在你的魔法火球!
I cast upon thee a spell of fireball!
不.
No.
不是spork的.
Not the spork.
beholdeth,titanius,我是冻结雷你.
Beholdeth, Titanius, I cast a freeze ray upon you.
太荒谬了.没有这种冻结雷.
That’s ridiculous. There’s no such thing as a freeze ray.
什么,你是说在寒冷吗?-是的,那个.
What, you mean a cone of coldness? – Yeah, that.
不!不!反对的人也在寒冷的.
No! No! Fancy men are defenseless against cone of coldness.
我好冷…什么?
I’m freezing… What?
班德,不.
Bender, no.
年轻的时候学地窖&龙
When will young people learn that Dungeons & Dragons
不会让你很酷吗?
won’t make you cool?
放松,煎.我是个医生.
Relax, Fry. I’m a doctor.
我肯定机器人会好一点.
I’m sure the robot will be just fine with a little help.
帮助,帮助.
Help, help.
救命!
Help!
请,让病人.
Please, send in the patient.
是的,医生.
Yes, Doctor.
那么,班德,我知道你很难把幻想和现实.
So, Bender, I understand you’re having trouble separating fantasy from reality.
谁说的?是那个怪物吗?
Says who? Was it the bugbear?
他是在说我吗?-我明白了.
Is he talking about me again? – I understand.
开始治疗.
Commence therapy.
告诉我你的感觉.
Tell me about your feelings.
可怜的.
Poor Bender.
这里说告诉他朋友他在温泉.
Says here to tell his friends he’s at a spa.
发生了什么事班德?-他在温泉.
So what happened to Bender? – He’s at a spa.
哇,有个温泉坚果吗?
Wow, there’s a spa in the nut house?
朋友,朋友,阻止一切.有的搅拌器.
Friends, friends, stop everything. There’s food in this shaker.
噢!
Ow!
够了!你能把它的项圈?
Enough already! Can you please remove this anger collar?
你还在生气呢?-没有.噢!
Are you still angry? – No. Ow!
也打击你撒谎.
It also shocks you when you lie.
安静,各位.网络新闻了.
Quiet, everyone. The network news is on.
如果我,一个165-year-old伙计,不小心,谁会?
And if I, a 165-year-old man, don’t watch it, who will?
谢天谢地,他说马是获救了
Thankfully, the amazing talking horse was rescued
和安全返回肉的.
and safely returned to the meat department.
转到更愚蠢的一部分,
Turning to the less stupid portion of our broadcast,
燃料价格打个最高今天是正在暗物质不足的.
fuel prices hit an all-time high today due to the ongoing dark matter shortage.
之前,我们的morbo坐在和妈妈,
Earlier, our own Morbo sat down with Mom,
是妈妈的跨国公♥司♥的能量砾岩.
CEO of Mom ‘s Friendly Multinational Energy Conglomerate.
哦!你好,morbo的歼灭者,这里,
Oh! Hello, Morbo the Annihilator, here,
要茶在客厅太假了.
sitting down to a delightful tea in this fake living room set.
谢谢收看,妈妈.
Thank you for joining us, Mom.
我的荣幸,甜言蜜语的.
My pleasure, sugarplum.
妈妈,你控制世界只有黑暗的事.
Mom, you control the world’s only dark matter mine.
告诉我们,为什么燃料价格太高?
Tell us, why are fuel prices so high?
哦!太可怕了,不是吗?
Oh! It’s terrible, isn’t it?
暗物质是很少见的,
Dark matter is just so rare nowadays,
但我们会把一条面包然后从地球的,
but we’ll keep pinching loaf after loaf from the bowels of the earth,
即使我输了记录.
even if I lose money on every log.
如果你输了钱,你怎么柱记录利润下弦月吗?
If you are losing money, how did you post record profits last quarter?
你瘦了,照顾我的山核桃簇吗?
You look thin, care for one of my famous pecan clusters?
morbo不该会去morbo是巨大的额头.
Morbo shouldn’t. It will go straight to Morbo’s gargantuan forehead.
哦,什么?我想我可以摧毁一个或两个.
Oh, what the heck? I guess I could destroy one or two of them.
人们关心到钻暗物质
Do people care enough to drill for dark matter
即使在阿♥拉♥斯加野生动物避难所吗?
even in an Alaskan wildlife refuge?
人们的.
People do.
贪婪的老巫婆,尝到我的拖鞋.
Greedy old hag, taste the wrath of my fuzzy slipper.
教授,你为什么这么热和dusty在暗物质不足吗?
Professor, why are you so hot and dusty over this dark matter shortage?
我打赌你想知道.我打赌你想知道,没错.
I bet you’d like to know. I bet you’d like to know, indeed.
你好,妈妈.怎么面试怎么样?
Hello, Mother. How did the interview go?
让我想吐我脸.
It made me want to puke my face off.
我的大腿冲击波吗?-,妈妈.
Where’s my Thigh Blaster? – Right here, Mom.
闭嘴!-好吧,谢谢.
Shut up! – Okay, thank you.
燃烧,你的大腿.烧!
Burn, you damn thighs. Burn!
妈妈,你难过的暗物质不足吗?
Mommy, are you upset ’cause of the dark matter shortage?
没有了,你蠢ass-brain!
There is no shortage, you moronic ass-brain!
没有吗?但是你说…
There’s not? But you said…
让我解释.想手代表电流储备的暗物质
Allow me to explain. Suppose this hand represents current reserves of dark matter
这个手代表消费者需求.
and this hand represents consumer demand.
嗯.
Uh-huh.
我打赌你想知道为什么我很生气
I just bet you’d like to know why I’m so angry
这个暗物质不足的.
about this dark matter shortage.
我非常感谢你.
I bet very much you’d like to know.
你是对的,教授.我们想知道.
You’re right, Professor. We would like to know.
真的吗?我想没人有兴趣.
Really? I didn’t think anyone was interested.
开始30-odd年前.
It all started 30-odd years ago.
我在妈妈的实验室第三次
I was working in Mom ‘s laboratories for the third time
追到她以前多么邪恶
after twice before realizing how evil she was
而且发誓要对她没上班.
and vowing never to work for her again.
但是富人,错的她瘦骨嶙峋的魅力
But somehow the rich, wrong stench of her boney charms
我回来了.
kept calling me back.
别停下,教授.我清醒了.
Don’t stop, Professor. I’m getting aroused.
在那些日子里,暗物质只是好奇的惰性,
Back in those days, dark matter was just a worthless inert curiosity,
我砸个粒子加速器,
and I was smashing it in a particle accelerator,
在不够周密试图创造一个更持久的大键琴蜡.
in an ill-conceived attempt to create a more durable harpsichord wax.
但是,作为deepakchopra教我们的,量子物理意味着
But, as Deepak Chopra taught us, quantum physics means
什么事都没有了.
anything can happen at any time for no reason.
还有,吃很多麦片,
Also, eat plenty of oatmeal,
还有动物没有战争.
and animals never had a war.
谁是真正的动物?
Who’s the real animals?
因此,反对他们,这事.
And thus against all probabilities, it happened.
该死!
Dang!
我不需要解释了所有黑暗宇宙
I’m sure I don’t need to explain that all dark matter in the universe
相连的形式一个non-localmeta-particle的.
is linked in the form of a single non-local meta-particle.
别烦我们.
Stop patronizing us.
那么,在一瞬间,我把所有事都黑了
So, in one instant, I had transformed all dark matter everywhere
到新晶形的…
into a new crystalline form…
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