飞出个未来大电影1：班德大行动（2007）

星际快递点名时间到!
Planet Express delivery company roll call!
船长图安佳·莉拉! 到!
Captain Turanga Leela! Here!
王牌投递员 菲利普 J·弗莱
Delivery boy, first class, Philip J. Fry!
到!
Here!
销♥售♥副经理 班德·班丁·罗德里格斯!
Assistant Manager of Sales, Bender Bending Rodriguez!
到!
Here!
再给我一瓶啤酒
Cerveza, por favor.
长♥期♥实习生 艾米·王
Long-term intern, Amy Wong.
到!
Here!
公♥司♥医生 约翰 A·佐艾伯格
Company physician, Dr. John A. Zoidberg.
我以为这是我的
I thought it was mine.
公♥司♥官僚 赫米斯·康拉德
Bureaucrat Grade 34, Hermes Conrad
就是我
is who I am.
接下来介绍创立星际快递的头
And now I am proud to present the owner and founder of Planet Express,
休伯特·法兹沃斯教授!
Professor Hubert J. Farnsworth!
你们都被解雇了
You’re all fired.
不是开玩笑吧!
Sweet bongo of the Congo!
事实上 你们两年前就丢了饭碗
In fact, you were fired two years ago.
在那时我们的业务已被投递公♥司♥关闭
That’s when we were shut down by the delivery network.
没错 经营公♥司♥的那些白♥痴♥
Yes, I’m afraid the brainless drones who run the network
取消了我们的营业执照
canceled our license.
我们被取消执照了?
We were canceled?
是啊 很糟糕 糟透了
Oh, it’s terrible. Just terrible.
现在 收拾东西走人吧 抓紧时间
Well, clear out your desks and move along. Chop-chop.
你好? 明白了
Yes? I see.
各位 好消息!
Good news, everyone!
取消我们执照的那些低能儿因为无能被解雇了
Those asinine morons who canceled us were themselves fired for incompetence.
不仅被解雇 还被揍了一顿 伤的不轻
And not just fired, but beaten up, too. And pretty badly.
其实 他们大部分都因伤势过重而死
In fact, most of them died from their injuries.
然后被制成了一种粉红色的粉末
And then they were ground up into a fine pink powder.
什么? 一种万能粉末
Why? Oh, it’s got a million and one uses.
还可以降火
That soothes the fire.
这对我们和众多粉丝又意味着什么?
So what does this mean for us and our many fans?
意味着我们又回到太空中了
It means we’re back on the air!
没错 乘着我们巨大的飞船
Yes, flying on the air in our mighty spaceship.
宝贝 我们回来了!
We’re back, baby!
狂欢吧!
Party!
加油 加油 加油!
Go, go, go!
低点 割草机!
Lower, lawn mower!
怎么了 机器人? 你的背就这么僵硬?
What’s the matter, robot? You got a rod up your spine?
是的 我就是这么构造的
Yes, I do. That’s how I’m built.
漂亮 还能再低!
Hooray. Way to bend it!
你是最棒的 班德!
You’re the greatest, Bender!
在牙买♥♥加 这种难度就是小菜一碟
In Jamaica, we got 10-story office buildings lower than that.
你来试试 牙买♥♥加人
Let’s see you beat it, Rasta man.
玩点刺♥激♥的 拿把马刀过来
Let’s make it interesting. Fetch down one of them sabers.
很有弹性 用这个改造我的背倒不错
Oh, flexible. That would go good up my spine.
再低点
Lower.
胖子赢了!
The fat guy wins!
太棒了 赫米斯!
Go, Hermes!
这就是他们叫我”11英寸康拉德”的原因
That’s why they call me 11-inch Conrad.
哦 不
Oh, no.
飞出个未来 永无宁日!
头颅陈列馆 “教父”中的马头
能救救赫米斯吗 性感医生?
Can you save Hermes, Dr. Goodensexy?
我都说过了 我叫卡希尔医生
I told you, my name is Dr. Cahill.
我大概就是这个金发荡♥妇♥值班时被砍的
Figures I’d get mangled while the blond bimbo’s on duty.
先生 我是个医生
I’m a doctor, sir.
金发碧眼 磁性的嗓音 欲望的双唇
The mere fact that I’m blond and have a breathy voice,
和丰满的身材并不意味着我就是个荡♥妇♥
full sensual lips and a steaming hot body doesn’t make me a bimbo.
我们聊聊
Tell me about it.
我想什么是性感 我们都很了解了
I think we’ve all learned a thing or two about sexual stereotypes
可我的头再不放到罐子里就完了 你这个荡♥妇♥!
while my head’s slowly dying ’cause I’m not in a jar yet, you bimbo!
哦 对了 差点忘了!
Oh, right. Ditzy-witzy!
拉尔斯 又有活了!
Lars, got another jar job!
抱歉 医生 我正在给科特妮·洛芙消毒…
Oh, sorry, Doctor. I was disinfecting Courtney Love…
哦 你好
Oh, hello.
你看哪儿呢? 我的眼睛?
What are you looking at? Is it the eye?
对极了
Guilty as charged.
你的眼睛很漂亮 脉脉含情
It’s a nice looking eye, and there’s plenty of it.
哦 我认识你吗? 显然不认识
Oh. Do I know you? Apparently not.
嗨 我叫拉尔斯 我叫莉拉
Hi. I’m Lars. Oh. I’m Leela.
很高兴见到你 很高兴被你见到
Nice to meet you. Nice to be met.
要泡妞找别的时间 你个光头色鬼
Pick up ladies on your own time, you shiny-headed goat.
先生 你快死了所以有点冒火 马上就好!
Sir, you’re just a little enraged ’cause you’re dying. Up and away!
拉尔斯在挑逗你
Lars is so flirting with you.
才没有 他只是很礼貌
He is so not. He’s just being polite.
他以为自己是什么人? 对你礼貌?
Who does he think he is, being polite to you?
要我揍他一顿吗? 不 别这么不成熟
You want me to beat him up? No. Stop being so immature.
我会让你知道是谁不成熟
I’ll show her who’s immature.
“戴高乐将军”? 没听说过
“Charles de Gaulle”? Never heard of you.
我从纳粹手中解放了法国…
I freed France from the Nazis and…
嗨 莉拉 我是个法国人了
Hey, Leela. I’m some French guy.
你吓到这个法国人了 伙计!
Rock that Frenchman, baby!
哦 我可怜的小加勒比海盗
Oh, my poor little love pirate of the Caribbean.
好了 老婆 一切都会…
There, there, wife. Everything will be all…
听着 赫米斯 你得替孩子想想
Okay, look, Hermes, we got to think of the boy.
他需要一个爸爸 他有爸爸
He needs a daddy. He has a daddy.
不 他只有两个半个的爸爸
No, he got two half-daddies.
他的身体会痊愈吗? 是的 但得过几天
Will his body be all right? Yes, but it may take a few days.
不 等不了了
No, not soon enough.
走 德怀特 去给你找个英俊的新爸爸
Come, Dwight, let’s find you a handsome new father.
勒芭芭拉 不!
LaBarbara, no!
没关系 赫米斯 你还有我们
It’s okay, Hermes. We’re all here for you.
好消息 各位!
Good news, everyone!
我们要送货去裸体星球
We’ve got a delivery to the nude beach planet.
再见 混♥蛋♥
So long, jerk.
过了漫长的两年又来掌舵感觉真好
It feels great to be back at the wheel after two long years.
那不是舵
That’s not the wheel.
外面感觉不错
It’s nice out.
“你至少得裸到这样”?
“You must be at least this naked”?
还能怎么裸?
How much nakeder could you be?
看好了
Watch and learn.
我说 你太逗了 什么?
You know, it’s funny. What?
你那根小香肠啊!
Your wiener!
我要下水息息火再上来招摇
Well, I’m going in the water to prune up a bit before I strut.
谁跟我一起来? 我去!
Who’s with me? I’m in!
我去 我去
I’m in. Yeah, I’ll go.
你们先去吧
You guys go ahead.
我得找到酒保给他这盒酒吧高脚凳软化剂
I gotta find the bartender and deliver this box of barstool softener.
先生 这是您的包裹
Here’s your package, sir.
你干吗对着我老二说话? 哦 抱歉 请在这儿签字
Why are you talking to my penis? Oh, sorry. Sign here.
能用一下你的笔吗? 不过 那不是…
Mind if I use your pen? Well, that’s not a…
名字首字母写这儿
And initial here.
感谢您选择星际快递
Thank you for using Planet Express.
嗨 弗莱 你屁♥股♥上居然有班德的纹身
Hey, Fry, I didn’t know you had a tattoo of Bender on your ass.
我 没啊
Me, neither.
你有我的纹身?
You got a tattoo of me?
不错啊 就像对着一面臭哄哄的镜子
Neat. It’s like looking in a smelly mirror.
只是一小点 没什么好大惊小怪的
So he’s got a little ink. Big whoop.
多好的阳光
Sweet photons.
不管光是波还是粒子 照在身上总是那么柔和
I don’t know if you’re waves or particles, but you go down smooth.
先生 能在我们的请♥愿♥书上签个字吗?
Sir, would you care to sign our petition?
我也反对很多事情 但还没到想写诉状的程度
I support and oppose many things, but not strongly enough to pick up a pen.
那些反对
That’s just what the guys
你所支持事务的人最好你这样了
who oppose the things you support want you to do.
真的? 让那些人见鬼去吧!
Really? Down with those guys!
还有你的e-mail地址
And we’ll need your e-mail address.
可e-mail地址是一个人的隐私
They say you shouldn’t give out your e-mail address.
是啊 那些家伙也这么说
Right. That’s just what those same guys say.
又是那些人?
Them again?