老友记 第二季 第八集

Ross: I don’t know what I’m gonna do. What am I gonna do? I mean, this is like a complete nightmare!
我不知道该怎么办？我该怎么办？这简直是一场恶梦。
Chandler: I know. This must be so hard. “Oh, no! Two women love me! They’re both gorgeous and sexy, my wallet’s too small for my 50s…and my diamond shoes are too tight!”
我知道，这一定很难受。“不，两个女人都爱我！她们都那么优秀，我的钱太多，皮包装不下……我的钻石鞋太紧了。”
Joey: Here’s a thought, Ross. -Chandler: Don’t touch the computer. Don’t ever touch the computer.
我有一个办法，罗斯。-别碰我的电脑，永远都别碰电脑。
Joey: Ross, listen. I got two words for you: Threesome.
罗斯，听着，我送你五个字：三人行（3P）。
Chandler: Okay. All right. Look. Let’s get logical about this. Okay. We’ll make a list. “Rachel and Julie: Pros and Cons.”
我们用理性来分析，好吗？我们来列个单子。“瑞秋和茱莉，优缺点”。
Chandler: We’ll put their names in bold, with different fonts, and I can use different colors for each column.
她俩的名字用不同字体的粗体字，我可以给每一栏用不同的颜色（来写上）。
Ross: Can’t we just use a pen? -Chandler: No, Amish boy.
不能够用笔就好了吗？-不可以，阿们宗派男孩（17世纪成立）。
Joey: All right. Let’s start with the cons, ’cause they’re more fun. Rachel first.
我们就先从缺点开始，那比较好玩一点。先列瑞秋。
Ross: I don’t know. I mean…. All right, I guess you can say she’s a little spoiled sometimes.
我不知道，我是说……好吧，我想你可以说她有时候有一点娇纵。
Joey: You could say that.
可以这么说。
Ross: I guess, you know, sometimes she’s a little ditzy, you know? And I’ve seen her be a little too into her looks.
有时候……她有点像没头脑。我觉得她有点太注重她的外表。
Ross: And oh, and Julie and I, we have a lot in common ’cause we’re both paleontologists, right? But Rachel’s just a waitress.
茱莉跟我有很多共同点，因为我们都是古生物学家。但是瑞秋她只是个女服务生。
Chandler: Waitress. Got it. You guys wanna play Doom? Or we could keep doing this. What else?
女服务生。好了，你们想玩“毁灭战士”（著名的射击游戏）吗？我们也可以继续。还有呢？
Ross: I don’t know.
我不知道。
Joey: Oh! Her ankles are a little chubby.
噢，她的脚踝有一点胖。
Chandler: Okay, let’s do Julie. What’s wrong with her?
换茱莉了。她有什么不好的？
Ross: She’s not Rachel.
她不是瑞秋。
Monica: Okay, this is pumpkin pie with a Macholate cookie crumb crust.
好了，这是麻克力饼屑南瓜馅饼。
Monica: This is Macholate cranberry cake, and these are Macholate-chip cookies. Just like the lndians served.
这个是麻克力红莓蛋糕，而这些是麻克力饼干。跟印第安人的一样。
Rachel: Oh, my God! -Monica:”Oh, my God” good?
天啊。-“天啊”很好？
Rachel: Oh, my God! I can’t believe you let me put this in my mouth.
天啊，我不敢相信你给我吃这个。
Phoebe: Oh! Sweet Lord! This is what evil must taste like!
噢，上帝啊！这一定是恶魔的味道。
Chandler: I’m telling you, this thing won’t print.
我说这个玩意儿不能打印。
Chandler: Yes, I pressed that button, like, 100 times. You know for a hotline, you’re not so hot.
对，那个按钮我按了一百次了。就热线而言，你一点都不热情。
Chandler: What is that in the background? Are you watching Star Trek?
你那边是什么声音？你在看《星际迷航》？
Joey: Hey, so how did go with Julie? Did you break her heart?
你和朱莉怎么样了？你让茱莉心碎了吗？
Ross: Yes. It was horrible. She cried, I cried. She threw things, they hit me. I did the right thing.
是啊，好可怕，她哭，我也哭，她丢东西，打到了我。我这么做是对的。
Chandler: So, Spock actually hugs his father?
史波克（《星际迷航》中的角色）真的拥抱了他爸爸吗？
Rachel: Hey, do you guys have… Hi!
你们有没……嗨！
Rachel: Where you going? -Ross: I just got back…from…from Julie’s.
你去哪儿了？-我刚刚……从茱莉那边回来。
Rachel: Oh. -Ross: No, no. It’s not what you think. It’s the other thing.
哦。-不……不是你想的那样，是别的事。
Rachel: Well, what’s the other thing? What do I think? -Ross: Well…. -Joey: He broke up with Julie!
什么是别的事？我会怎么想？-这个嘛…… -他跟茱莉分手了。
Joey: Well, go hug her, for God’s sakes!
看在老天的份上，去抱抱她呀。
Rachel: Really? -Ross: Really. It’s always been you, Rach.
真的？-真的，我爱的一直是你。
Rachel: Oh, God. Oh, this is good. This is really good. -Ross: I know. I know. It’s almost….
天啊。这真好，这真的很好。-我知道……几乎……
Ross: What do you say we go take a walk? Just us. Not them.
我们出去走一走怎么样？就我们两个人，没有他们。
Rachel: Okay, let me get my coat. -Ross: Okay. No, hey! Whoa. Whoa. I’ll get your coat. -Rachel: Okay.
好，我去拿外套。-好，不……我帮你拿 -好。
Rachel: He’s going to get my coat. He’s going to get my coat, Joey!
他去帮我拿外套，他去帮我拿外套，乔伊。
Rachel: Joey, I can’t believe this! This is unbelievable!
乔伊，我不敢相信这个！我真不敢相信！
Rachel: What’s that? -Chandler: What? Nothing!
那是什么？-什么？没什么。
Rachel: I saw my name. What is it? -Chandler: No, no, see? See?
我看到我的名字，是什么？-不，不，你看……
Chandler: Hey. It’s printing! Hey, it’s printing!
在印了在印了！
Rachel: What is it? Let me see!
那是什么嘛？给我看。
Ross: Hey, someone order a coat?
有人订了件外套吗？
Rachel: Ross, Chandler wrote something about me on hie computer and he won’t let me see.
罗斯，钱德在电脑上写了关于我的事还不让我看。
Ross: He won’t? He won’t!
他有吗？他没有！
Ross: Because isn’t that…the short story you were writing? -Chandler: Yes, it is a short story, that I was writing.
因为那是不是……你正在写的短篇故事。-对，那是一篇我正在写的……短篇故事。
Rachel: And I’m in it? Let me read it. -All: No!
里面有我？那让我看啊。-不！
Rachel: Come on! -Joey: Hey, why don’t you read it to her? -Chandler: All right.
好啦。-干脆你念给她听好了。-好吧。
Chandler:”It was summer. And it was hot. Rachel was there. A lonely gray couch. ‘Oh, look!’ cried Ned. And the kingdom was his forever. The end!”
那个时候是夏天，天气很热。瑞秋在那里。寂寞的灰沙发。奈德大叫“看啊”，然后他就是永远的国王了，剧终。
Ross: That’s it? That’s all you wrote? You’re the worst writer in the whole world!
就这样？你只写了这样？你是全世界最烂的作家！
Rachel: All right, you know what? This isn’t funny anymore. There’s something about me on that piece of paper, and I want to see it.
好了，我不再觉得好玩了。那张纸上写了关于我的事情，而我想要看一看。
Chandler: No, you don’t.
不，不可以。
Rachel: All right, you know what? Fine. If you guys want to be children about this, that’s fine. I do not need to see it!
好吧，你们要这么孩子气的话，没关系，我根本就不需要看。
Rachel: What is this? -Chandler: That is….
这是什么？-这是……
Ross: Ross, what is this?
罗斯，这是什么？
Chandler: Thank you. -Joey: Good luck.
谢谢。-祝你好运。
Ross: Okay. Just remember how crazy I am about you, okay?
你只要记得我多为你疯狂。
Rachel: “Kind of ditzy”? “Too into her looks”? “Spoiled”? -Ross: Now that’s a little spoiled. He was supposed to type “little”, the idiot!
“有点没头脑”？“太注重外表”？“娇纵”？-是有一点娇纵，他应该加上“有一点”才对，那个笨蛋。
Rachel: “Just a waitress”? -Ross: Now that was…. I mean, as opposed to…. Okay, is this over yet? Rach?
“只是个女服务生” -那是……我是说，相对于……你念完了没有，瑞秋？
Rachel: I do not have chubby ankles! -Ross: No! No, Rachel… Okay, look at the other side. Look at Julie’s column.
我的脚踝一点都不肥。-不，瑞秋……好你……看另一边嘛，你看看茱莉那一栏。
Rachel: Wha…”She’s not Rachem”? What the hell’s a Rachem?
“她不是瑞琪”？瑞琪是什么东西啊？
Rachel: Is that some stupid paleontology word that I wouldn’t know because I’m just a waitress?
那是什么？是因为我是女服务生而不懂的愚蠢古生物用语吗？
Ross: Rach, come on! Rach. NO no… It’s “She’s not Rachel”! She’s not…. Ra… Rachel?
不，瑞秋，你不要这样，是“她不是瑞秋”。她不是…瑞…瑞秋？