Friends Season 1 Episode 21 : The one with the Ick Factor.

注释：ick：呕（非正式，表示恶心或不舒服），icky指讨厌的，过分甜的，粘得讨厌的。

老友记第1季第21集: 让人厌恶的因素。

Phoebe: Tell him.
告诉他嘛 就给他说吧，
Monica: Just, please.
求你了。
Rachel: Come on, shut up.
拜托，闭嘴。
Chandler: Tell me what?
告诉我什么？
Monica: Look at you. You won’t even look at him.
你看你，你都不好意思正眼看他了。
Chandler: Oh, c’mon, tell me. I could use another reason why women won’t look at me.
拜托，告诉我。下回小妞不看我时，我就有安慰自己的新借口了。
Rachel: All right. All right. All right. Last night, I had a dream…that, uh, you and I…were
好吧，好，好。昨晚我梦到……你和我…… 在
Phoebe: Doing it on this table.
在这张桌子上做♥爱。
Joey: Wow, excellent dream score.
在梦里你还挺猛的哈。
Ross: Why would you dream that?
你怎么会梦到那个？
Chandler: More importantly…was I any good?
更重要的是，我活儿好不好？
Rachel: Well, you were pretty damn any good.
哦，你的活儿太他妈的好了。
Chandler: Interesting. ‘Cause in my dreams, I’m surprisingly inadequate.
有意思。因为在我的梦里，我怎么都硬不起来。
Rachel: Well, last night, you seemed to know your way around the table.
昨晚，你表现可是很好哦。
Ross: I love it when we share.
咱们分享性事时，我总是很喜欢。
Chandler: You okay there?
你没事吧？
Ross: I can’t believe you two had sex in her dream.
我真不敢相信你和她竟然在她的梦里做♥爱。
Chandler: I’m sorry, it was a onetime thing. I was very drunk, and it was someone else’s subconscious. Hello, Rachel.
对不起，不会有下次了。我当时已经醉的不行了，而且这是发生在别人的潜意识的事阿。你好啊，瑞秋。
Rachel: Get off.
上一边儿去。
Phoebe: Oh, oh, give me. Can you see me operating a drill press?
给我，你们能想像在操作钻床的我吗？
Joey: I don’t know. What are you wearing?
这不好说。你当时穿的啥？
Ross: Why would you want to operating a drill press?
你怎么会想着去操作钻床呢？
Phoebe: Just for some short term work. You know, until I get back some of my massage clients.
只是暂时的工作，直到我找回一部分我的按♥摩客源为止。
Chandler: Pirates again?
又是海盗？
Phoebe: No. Nothing like that. I’m just such a dummy. I taught this “Massage Yourself at Home” workshop. And they are.
不，绝对不会。我就一蠢货。我教授一个”居家自助按♥摩”学习班，结果他们就真的都居家自助按♥摩了。
Joey: Hey, hey, Chan, she could work for you.
嘿，小钱，她可以给你工作。
Chandler: Thanks, Joey. That’s a good idea.
多谢，乔伊，这是个好主意。
Phoebe: I could. I could do it. What is it?
我行。我能行。是什么工作？
Chandler: Well, my secretary’s gonna be out for a couple of weeks. She’s having one of her boobs reduced. It’s a whole big boob story.
我的秘书这几周都不会来上班。她要去切掉她的一个咪♥咪。那个咪♥咪背后还有段一言难尽的故事哦。
Phoebe: I could be a secretary.
我能当一名秘书。
Chandler: Well, you know, Pheebs. I don’t know if it’s your kinda thing, because it involves a lot of being normal, for a large portion of the day.
额，这个，恐怕你不太适合这份工作。因为这份工作要求你表现的很正常，至少一天中的大部分时间要”正常”。
Phoebe: I could do that.
我做得到。
Rachel: What’re you playing with?
你在玩什么？
Ross: Oh, it’s My new beeper.
我的新BP机。
Joey: What the hell does a paleontologist need a beeper for?
你一个古生物学家要BP机干嘛？
Monica: Is it, like, for dinosaur emergencies? Help. Come quick. They’re still extinct.
是用来应付恐龙紧急事件的吗？救命，快来。他们还是绝种了。
Ross: No. It’s for when Carol goes into labor. She can get me wherever I am. All she has to do is dial 55JIMBO.
不，这是为了凯洛生孩子用的。不管我在哪，她都能联♥系到我。她只要拨打55JIMBO就行了。
Chandler: A cool phone number and a possible name for the kid.
这号码真酷，还能当孩子的名字。
Monica: I’ll see you guys later.
各位回见啦。
Rachel: Off to see young Ethan?
去见小伊森吗？
Monica: Thank you.
谢谢。
Joey: How young is young Ethan? Young?
小伊森到底有多小？很小吗？
Monica: He’s our age.
他和我们年纪相仿。
Chandler: When we were….
当我们还是……
Monica: OK, he’s a senior in college.
好吧，他是个大四的学生。
Ross: College? Wow…
大学？哇哦。
Joey: Rob that cradle.
老牛吃嫩草喽。
Monica: He’s smart, and, and mature, and grownup.
他聪明，而且成熟，而且他还成年了。
Ross: Mature and grownup, he’s a big boy.
成熟而且成年，他就是个大孩子嘛。
Chandler: And this manchild has no problem with how old you are?
这位小大人就不在乎你多大吗？
Monica: No, of course not. It’s not even an issue… ’cause I told him I was 22.
不，当然不在乎。这都不是个事儿。因为我告诉他我才22岁。
Chandler: What?
啥？
Monica: Oh, I can’t pass for 22?
我不像22的吗？
Phoebe: Well, maybe 25,26.
25，26还凑合说的过去。
Monica: I am 26.
我就是26岁。
Phoebe: There you go.
这就对了。
Chandler: Can you hear that?
能听到吗？
Phoebe: Yeah.
能。
Chandler: See, that’ll stop when you pick up the phone.
你把电话拿起来它就不响了。
Phoebe: Oh, I’m on.
我来。
Chandler: Okay.
好。
Phoebe: Mr. Bing’s office. No, I’m sorry, he’s in a meeting right now.
宾先生办公室。不，抱歉，他正在开会。
Chandler: I’m not in a meeting. I’m…
我没在开会，我在……
Phoebe: Will he know what this is in reference to? And he has your number? I’ll see that he gets the message. Byebye. Ross says hi. So fun. What do we do now?
他知道这件事指的是什么吗？他有你的号码？好，我会转告他的，再见。罗斯打的。真好玩。现在干什么？
Chandler: Well, now I actually have to get to work.
现在我得工作了。
Phoebe: “Most likely.” Okay, I’m gonna be out there. All right. Byebye.
“应该是”。我就在外面。好的，拜拜。
Chandler: Byebye.
拜拜。
Phoebe: Yes? What you doing?
又咋了？你干嘛呢？
Monica: Okay, windows are clean. Candles are lit. Belt’s too tight. Gotta change the belt. Did I turn the fish? Nope, because I made lasagna. Am I out of control?
窗户擦的明亮亮，蜡烛点的亮堂堂。就是皮带太紧，我得换一条去。鱼翻过了没？没，因为我做的是意大利千层面。我是不是有点走火人魔了？
Rachel: Just a touch. Mon, I don’t understand. You’ve been dating this guy since like…what, his midterms. Why, all of a sudden, are you so…?
有点。莫妮，我搞不懂。你从……额……他期中考就开始约会他了。为什么，你突然间如此……
Monica: What?
咋了？
Rachel: Could tonight be the night?
今夜就要过夜吗？
Monica: I don’t know. Look, he’s a great guy… and I love being with him. But, you know… things happen when they happen. You don’t plan these things.
我不知道。他是个好男人。我喜欢和他在一起，但是…世事难料。这种事无法事先计划好。
Rachel: So, did you shave your legs?
腿毛刮了没？
Monica: Yeah.
刮了。
Joey: Would you let it go, Ross? It was just a dream. It doesn’t mean…
罗斯，咱能别这样了吗？这只是个梦而已。这并不代表……
Ross: Oh, This is it. Oh, my God. It’s baby time!
这就是了！天哪！宝宝要出生了！
Joey: Relax, relax, relax. Be cool, be cool.
放轻松，放轻松。冷静，冷静。
Ross: Yeah, hi. I was just beeped. No, Andre is not here. Third time today. Yes, I am sure. No, sir. I do not perform those kind of services.
是，你好。刚刚有人呼我。不，安德烈不在这儿。今天已是第三次了。对，我确定。不，先生。我不提供那种服务。
Joey: Services? Oh, services.
服务？哦，服务。
Ross: Yeah, you want 55JUMBO. Yeah, that’s right. That’s right. JUMBO with a “U,” sir. No, believe me. You don’t want me. Judging by his number, I’d be a huge disappointment. Alrighty, byebye.
对，你要打的是55JUMB0。对，没错。没错，先生。有U的JUMB0。不，先生，相信我。你想呼的那个人不是我。从他的号码看来，你看到我会失望的。好滴，再见。
Joey: Hey, hey. How was the first day?
嘿，嘿。第一天上班感觉如何？
Phoebe: Excellent. Everyone was so, so nice.
太棒了。每个人都是这么，这么的友好。
Chandler: See? It pays to know the man who wears my shoes. Me.
看到了吧？了解谁站在自己立场是(对自己)有好处的。就是在下。
Phoebe: No, I didn’t tell anybody that I knew you.
不，我没告诉任何人我认识你。
Chandler: Why not?
为什么不？
Phoebe: Well, because, you know… They don’t like you.
因为，这个……他们不喜欢你。

老友记.本章节注释

注释：ick：呕（非正式，表示恶心或不舒服），icky指讨厌的，过分甜的，粘得讨厌的。