Monica: No. No. Not after what happened with Steve.
不，从史蒂夫那次后，就再无可能了。
Chandler: What are you talking about? We love Schhteve! Schhteve was schhexy! ..
你在说什么？我们都爱Schhteve，Schhteve很性感！
Chandler: Sorry.
抱歉。
Monica: Look, I don’t even know how I feel about him yet. Just give me a chance to figure that out.
各位，我连自己对他有什么感觉都还不知道，给我点时间想清楚。
Rachel: Well, then can we meet him?
到时候我们能见见他了？
Monica: Nope. Schhorry.
不。抱—歉！
Ross: Joey, Joey, let it go.
乔伊，别再想了。
Monica: Why should I let them meet him? I mean, I bring a guy home, and within five minutes they’re all over him.
为什么我要让他们认识他？我意思是，我带个人回家，他们会在五分钟内蜂拥而上围住他。
Monica: They’re like coyotes, picking off the weak members of the herd.
coyote：土狼。
他们就像土狼一样专找牧群中的弱小下手。
Paula: Listen. As someone who’s seen more than her fair share of bad beef, I’ll tell you: that is not such a terrible thing.
听着，作为一个看过比自己的坏牛肉份额还多的人，我要告诉你：这不是一件那么糟糕的事情。
Paula: Come on, Mon, they’re your friends, they’re just looking out after you.
我的意思是，他们是你的朋友，他们只是在旁边替你留神。
Monica: I know. I just wish that once, I’d bring a guy home that they actually liked.
这我知道。我只是希望带一个他们真正满意的男人回家。
Paula: Well, you do realize the odds of that happening are a little slimmer if they never get to meet the guy.
odds：机会。
你确定知道这种事情发生的机会会更渺茫的…… 如果他们根本就没见过这小伙。
Monica: I know. I know. Mind if I whimper a little bit?
我知道，我知道。能让我小声的哭一下吗？
Paula: Whimper.
哭吧。
Monica: Okay, I’m done.
好，哭完了。
Joey: Let it go, Ross.
让这事过去吧，罗斯。
Ross: Yeah, well, you didn’t know Chi Chi.
是啊，可你不了解Chi Chi。
Monica: Do you all promise?
你们都保证？
All: Yeah! We promise! We’ll be good!
对，我们保证，我们会很好！
Monica: Chandler? Do you promise to be good?
钱德勒？你答应会很好？
Joey: You can come in, but your filter-tipped little buddy has to stay outside!
你可以进来了，但是你的烟头小朋友得呆在外面。
Ross: Hey, Pheebs.
喂，Pheebs。
Phoebe: “Dear Ms. Buffay. Thank you for calling attention to our error. We have credited your account with five hundred dollars. We’re sorry for the inconvenience, and hope you’ll accept this football phone…as our free gift.” Do you believe this? ! Now I have a thousand dollars, and a football phone!
亲爱的Buffay女士，谢谢你指出我们的错误。我们已将五百元存入你的户头，造成不便之处请多包涵。请接受这个足球电话，做为礼物。你们相信吗？现在我多了一千元和一个足球电话。
Rachel: What bank is this?
这是哪家银行？
Monica: Hey. It’s him. Who is it?
嗨，他来了。哪位？
Alan: It’s Alan.
艾伦。
Joey: Chandler! He’s here!
钱德勒！他来了！
Monica: Do I look okay?
我看起来怎么样？
Ross: One more button.
最好（再扣上）一颗扣子。
-Monica: Okay.
好吧。
Ross: Closed! How about closed?
我是说扣上！扣上怎么样？
Monica: I didn’t know.
我不太清楚。
Ross: Yeah.
好吧。
Monica: Please be good, Okay, Just remember how much you all like me.
友善一些哈，求你们了。想想你们大家有多么爱我。
Monica: Hi. Alan, this is everybody. Everybody, this is Alan.
嗨，艾伦，这是大家。各位，这位是艾伦。
Alan: Hi.
嗨。
All: Hi, Alan.
嗨，艾伦。
Alan: I’ve heard schho much about all you guyschh!
各位的大名如雷贯耳啊！
Monica: I’ll call you tomorrow. Thank you. Okay. Okay, let’s let the Alan-bashing begin.
bash：猛击、痛击。
我明天再打电话给你，谢谢，开始围攻艾伦吧。
Monica: Who’s gonna take the first shot, hmm? Come on!
谁先开始？来呀！
Ross:…I’ll go.
。。。我来。
Ross: Let’s start with the way he kept picking at no, I’m sorry, I can’t do this. We loved him.
我们就从他不停剔。。。开始，抱歉，我办不到。我们爱他。
All: We loved him! Yeah! He’s great!
我们爱他，他太棒了！
Monica: Wait a minute! We’re talking about someone that I’m going out with?
等等，我们谈的是我约会的对象吗？
All: Yeah!
是的。
Rachel: That pimento trick!
pimento： 西班牙甘椒。
那个甘椒的小把戏。
Chandler: I’ll never look at an olive the same way again.
我绝不会再以同样的方式看橄榄了。
Rachel: And did you notice…?
你们都有注意到。。。？
The Guys: Yeah.
是的。
Joey: You know what was great? The way his smile was kinda crooked.
crooked：扭曲的。
知道什么是很棒吗？他的微笑有点扭曲。
Phoebe: Yes, yes! Like the man in the shoe!
对，就像是鞋里的男人。
Ross: What shoe?
什么鞋？
Phoebe: From the nursery rhyme. ‘There was a crooked man, Who had a crooked smile, Who lived in a shoe, For a…while…’
童谣里的，有个驼背的人有着扭曲的微笑，他住在鞋子里，有一阵子。
Ross: So I think Alan…will become the yardstick against which all future boyfriends will be measured.
yardstick：标准。
我想艾伦……将应成为未来男朋友的标准。
Rachel: What future boyfriends? No no, I th I think this could be, you know, it.
什么未来男朋友？不，我想他就是了。
Monica: Really?
真的？
Chandler: Oh, yeah. I’d marry him just for his David Hasselholf of impression alone.
David Hasselholf：著名影视偶像，曾主演过《霹雳游侠》（Knight Rider）。
是的，光凭他学David Hasselholf的样子，我就想嫁给他了。
Chandler:You know I’m gonna be doing that at parties, right?
你知道嘛，我也要在派对上这么做。
Ross: You know what I like most about him, though?
知道我最喜欢他哪一点？
All: What?
哪一点？
Ross: The way he makes me feel about myself.
他让我对自己的感觉。
Monica: Hi. how was the game?
嗨，比赛怎么样？
Ross: Well…
怎么说呢
All: We won! ! Thank you! Yes!
我们赢了！谢谢你！我们赢了！
Monica: Fantastic! I have one question: How is that possible?
太棒了！我有个问题：这怎么可能？
Joey: Alan.
艾伦。
Ross: He was unbelievable. He was like that, that, that Bugs Bunny cartoon where Bugs is playing all the positions, right, but instead of Bugs it was first base Alan, second base Alan, third base…
Bugs Bunny：动画片《兔八哥》。
他真是太不可思议了，他就像兔巴哥卡通片中的兔巴哥一样守着每个位置。我们没有兔巴哥，但我们有一垒艾伦，二垒艾伦，三垒艾伦……
Rachel: I mean, it it was like, it was like he made us into a team.
我意思是，就像，他使我们成了一个团队。
Chandler: Yep, we sure showed those Hassidic jewellers a thing or two about softball.
Hassidic jewellers：哈西德珠宝商。Hassidism/Hasidism是犹太教正统派的一个分支。
是的，我们让哈西德珠宝商队见识了什么叫垒球。
Monica: Can I ask you guys a question? Do you ever think that Alan is maybe. . sometimes…
能问你们一个问题吗？你们是否认为艾伦可能有时……
Ross: What?
怎样？
Monica:…I don’t know, a little too Alan?
我说不上来，有点太艾伦了？
Rachel: Well, no. That’s impossible. You can never be too Alan.
怎么会，不可能的。你永远不可能太艾伦。
Ross: Yeah, it’s his, uh, innate Alanness that, that, that we adore.
没错，我们喜爱的就是艾伦那种内在的性格。
Chandler: I personally could have a gallon of Alan.
我一个人可以喝下一加仑的艾伦。
Phoebe: Hey, Lizzie.
嘿，Lizzie。
Lizzie: Hey, Weird Girl.
嘿，古怪女孩。
Phoebe: I brought you alphabet soup.
我带字母汤来给你。
Lizzie: Did you pick out the vowels?
你挑出有元音了吗？
Phoebe: Yes. But I left in the Ys. ‘Cause, you know, “sometimes y”. Uh, I also have something else for you.
但我把”Y”留下来了，因为，你懂的，“有时候（会问）问什么”，我还带了其他东西给你。
Lizzie: Saltines?
saltine：撒盐饼干，咸饼干。
咸饼干吗？
Phoebe: No, but would you like a thousand dollars and a football phone?
不对，你想要一千美元和足球电话吗？
Lizzie: What? Oh, my God! Oh my God, there’s really money in here.
什么？天啊，这里真的有钱。
Phoebe: I know.
我知道。
Lizzie: Weird Girl, what are you doing?
怪女孩，你在干什么？
Phoebe: No, I want you to have it. I don’t want it.
没什么，我想给你。我不想要。
Lizzie: No, no, I ha…I have to give you something.
不，不。我得-我得给你点什么东西。
Phoebe: No, that’s fine, you don’t…
不。不用了。
Lizzie: You want my tin foil hat?
foil：箔，金属薄片。
你要我的锡箔纸帽子吗？
Phoebe: No. ‘Cause you need that.
不用。因为你需要它。
Phoebe: No, it’s okay, thanks.
不用了，就这样，谢谢。
Lizzie: Please, let me do something.
求你，请让我做点什么。
Phoebe: Okay, alright, I’ll tell you what. you buy me a soda, and then we’re even. Okay?
好吧，给我买一听苏打水，我们就扯平，好不好？
Lizzie: Okay?
好吧。
Phoebe: Okay.
好吧。
Lizzie: Keep the change.
不用找了。
Phoebe: Thanks, Lizzie.
谢谢你，Lizzie。
Lizzie: Sure you don’t wanna pretzel?
pretzel：椒盐卷饼，也有人称它为蝴蝶脆饼，来源于德国或法国阿尔萨斯。它通常是蝴蝶形的，用小麦粉制成，口味是咸的。也有的翻译成德国结，迷你饼干圈，扭结饼，椒盐卷饼等。
你真的不要椒盐卷饼？
Phoebe: No, I’m fine. Thanks.
不，不用了。
Lizzie: See ya.
再见。
Ross: A thumb? !
一个拇指？
All: Eww!
恶心！
Phoebe: I know! I know, I opened it up and there it was, just floating in there, like this tiny little hitchhiker!
hitchhiker：搭便车的旅行者。
我知道，我打开瓶罐，就看见它，它浮在上面，就像小小的搭便车的人。
Chandler: Well, maybe it’s a contest, you know? Like, collect all five?
或者这是一场竞赛，你知道，比如集满五只手指有奖？
Phoebe: Does, um, anyone wanna see?
你们想看看吗？
All: No! Thanks.
不用了，谢谢。
All: Oh, hey, don’t do that! Cut it out!
噢，嗨，别那样！灭了它！
Rachel: It’s worse than the thumb!
这比姆指还糟糕。
Chandler: Hey, this is so unfair!
嗨，这太不公平了吧！
Monica: Oh, why is it unfair?
为什么不公平？
Chandler: So I have a flaw! Big deal!
我是有缺点！什么大不了的！
Chandler: Like Joey’s constant knuckle-cracking isn’t annoying?
knuckle-cracking：扳响指关节。
像Joey经常扳响指关节就不惹人厌吗？
Chandler: And Ross, with his over-pronouncing every single word.
还有罗斯，把每个字都过度发音。
Chandler: And Monica, with that snort when she laughs? I mean, what the hell is that thing?
snort：鼻子发哼声。
还有莫妮卡，笑时发出的猪叫声，我意思是，那到底是什么东西？
Chandler: I accept all those flaws, why can’t you accept me for this?
我接受大家所有的这些缺点，为何大家就不能接受我这一点呢？
Joey: Does the knuckle-cracking bother everybody?
扳响指关节真的烦到大家了？
Rachel: Well, I,I could live without it.
嗯，没有它我也能活。
Joey: Well, is it, like, a little annoying, or is it like when Phoebe chews her hair?
是吗，是这个有点儿烦，还是像菲比嚼她的头发惹人烦？
Ross: Oh, now, don’t listen to him, Pheebs, I think it’s endearing.
别听他的，Pheebs，我觉得很可爱。
Joey: Oh, “you do, do you”?
噢，”真的，是吗？”
Ross: You know, there’s nothing wrong with speaking correctly.
你知道，咬字清楚没什么不对。
Rachel: “Indeed there isn’t”…
“的确没错”……
Rachel: I should really get back to work.
我真的要去工作了。

老友记.本章节注释

coyote：土狼。
odds：机会。
bash：猛击、痛击。
pimento： 西班牙甘椒。
crooked：扭曲的。
yardstick：标准。
David Hasselholf：著名影视偶像，曾主演过《霹雳游侠》（Knight Rider）。
Bugs Bunny：动画片《兔八哥》。
Hassidic jewellers：哈西德珠宝商。Hassidism/Hasidism是犹太教正统派的一个分支。
saltine：撒盐饼干，咸饼干。
foil：箔，金属薄片。
pretzel：椒盐卷饼，也有人称它为蝴蝶脆饼，来源于德国或法国阿尔萨斯。它通常是蝴蝶形的，用小麦粉制成，口味是咸的。也有的翻译成德国结，迷你饼干圈，扭结饼，椒盐卷饼等。
hitchhiker：搭便车的旅行者。
knuckle-cracking：扳响指关节。
snort：鼻子发哼声。