徒手攀岩

我不知道 我都有点神经质了
I don’t know. I’m starting to get kind of psyched.
放手去做这件事的一刻
The moment of just letting go to it
大概是最安宁的一刻了
is in some ways the most peaceful because
因为你就是在做你自己的事情
then it’s like you just do your thing.
压力也没有了 焦虑也没有了
There’s no more stress, there’s no more anxiety,
恐惧也没有了 无论如何 你去做就可以了
there’s no fear, whatever, you just go up and do it.
我今天穿了勒紧的鞋 太爽了
I put on my tight shoes today, it’s like very exciting.
就像是
It would be, like,
就像武士拔出自己最爱的剑一样
it would be like a samurai pulling out his favorite sword,
就像
you know like,
天啊 就是 现在我就是
“Oh, my gosh,” you know, and now I’m like,
该是我宝剑出鞘的时候了
“Oh, time for the, the finely crafted blade.”
太激动了 我要迷醉了
So stoked. I like sinking into it.
感觉自己像是绝地武士 有了光剑一样
It’s, it goes with the Jedi thing, the samurai with the,
我刚开始服镇痛药
and then I just started taking Ibuprofen.
我在做冰敷了
I’ve been, like, icing a bunch and, like,
我想我的脚很快就能恢复
I think my foot’s gonna be pretty good.
你跟萨尼说这件事的时候她说了什么
what does Sanni say when you talk to her about it?
我其实没跟她说太多
Um, I mean I haven’t talked to her that much.
她一直 问我很多问题
She’s been, like, asking a lot of questions like,
怎么样
“Oh, you know, how’s it?”
我呢 我就没有过 我就是
And I’m, I just haven’t really like, I’m just like,
到时候就知道了 到时候就知道了
“Oh, we’ll see, we’ll see.”
其实越少人知道越好
You know, the fewer people know anything, the better really.
我做了个梦 梦到你一瘸一拐的 你就是
I had a dream and you were limping and you were like,
就又像上次一样摔下去了
had caught, had like made the exact same fall
你的脚踝又像这次一样摔伤
and fallen on your ankle in the exact same way.
这么想很不错啊 萨萨
That’s really nice, San San.
那太悲剧了
It was like tragic.
我喜欢听那样的故事
I love hearing stories about that.
我醒了之后想 天啊 要是没发生就好了
I woke up, like, “Oh my gosh. I hope that didn’t happen.”
那 那真不错
That’s, that’s really nice.
你那个小背包是干嘛用的
Um, what is your, is your daypack?
他们是给你和彼得带的吗
They’re bringing it up there for you and Peter?
不是
Um, no.
应该是给我明天用的吧
For me tomorrow, probably.
给你爬山用的吗
For on the mountain?
登顶用的 对
Um, for the summit, yeah.
你和彼得要试试爬完整座山吗
Hmm, you and Peter are gonna try and do the whole thing?
不是 彼得不会在这待多久
Uh, no, Peter won’t be here for a couple of days probably.
那你明天跟谁一起爬呢
Oh, who are you climbing with tomorrow?
明天就知道了
Um, yeah, we’ll just see.
那 好吧 好吧
Oh, okay, okay.
等等 那你是想着明天要单独去爬
Wait, so are you thinking of soloing it tomorrow,
所以才不告诉我你明天跟谁一起爬的吗
is that why you’re not telling me who you’re climbing with?
我不是不告诉你 但是你说的对
Um, well, I’m not like not telling you, but yeah.
亚历克斯
Whoa, Alex.
感觉如何
How do you feel?
我 你知道 我 我很激动
I’m, you know, I mean, excited.
这真的很让人激动 那种感觉是你在
That’s really exciting. Is it that feeling when you’re like…
特别兴奋 我又能做攀岩笔记了
So exciting I’m gonna go right back to my book.
你准备在哪 不 我不要看
Where you’re like, no, I’m not reading it.
你什么时候决定的
When did you decide?
-你什么时候决定明天就去的 -就昨天
– When did you decide to do it tomorrow? – No, just, you know,
要么就前天 就是这几天
yesterday or the day before or something.
我在消化这新消息
I’m processing.
在宏观上 我希望
I wanna, like I wanna have this more, like,
在你怀着那种心态
holistic approach that you have where
“人终有一死”
you’re like “Well, we’re all gonna die,
“在有生之年做自己想做的事”
like might as well do what we wanna do while we’re here and
“虽死无憾”时
it’s okay when people die,”
与我蓦然相遇
but I feel like I want you to meet me halfway
这样你徒手攀岩时将我也纳入想做的事中
and when you solo to take me into the equation
然后我想起你说过
and then I think you said…
-你是要提问吗 -提几个
– Is there a question? – Some,
-肯定要问的 -好吧
– there’s going to be. – Okay.
把我纳入其中会对你有所改变吗
would putting me into the equation actually ever change anything?
你会因此作出不同的决定吗
Would you actually make decisions differently?
如果我有某种尽可能活下去的义务
If I had some kind of obligation to maximize my lifespan,
那么我肯定应该放弃徒手攀岩
then like yeah, obviously I’d have to give up soloing and.
我现在对你的提问 唤醒你的这种义务了吗
Was me asking you, do you see that as an obligation now?
不 不
Uh, no, no.
但我很感谢你的关心 而且我非常在乎
No, but I appreciate your concerns and I, you know, I respect that,
但并没有感觉有这种义务
but, but I, in no way, feel obligated, no.
-尽可能活下去 -不 我也说不准
– To maximize lifetime? – No,I don’t know.
当你说”尽可能安全”时
Um, but I mean like you saying, “Be safer,”
我是 怎么说呢 办不到
I’m kinda like well, I mean I can’t.
我已经尽自己最大努力了
You know, I’m already doing my best.
所以我也可以不去攀岩了
So I could just, like, not do certain things,
但心中一定会忿忿不平
but then you have, like, weird simmering resentment
那就像生命中挚爱的事业破灭了
because it’s things that you love most in life have now been squashed.
懂我意思吧
You know what I mean?
-现在几点了 -凌晨三点三十
– What time is it? – 3:30.
闹钟响的前一分钟我就醒了
I just woke up one minute before my alarm.
你是醒早了还是醒晚了
Yeah, you woke up before or after?
醒早了一分钟
One minute before.
一心追求卓越和完美
It’s like always about, like, excellence and perfection.
我就是这样长大的
And I was certainly raised that way,
你需要好好表现
you know, that you need to, you need to perform.
同样 这也很酷
It’s also just like kind of rad
因为你正在做人类历史上
because you’re doing something for the first time
前无古人的事情
in human history.
希望今天运气不错
Let’s hope it’s a low gravity day.
再见 赫克 山下见
Bye, Huck, see you at the ground.
-山下见 -再见了兄弟
– Meet you in the ground. – See you, buddy.
第六段
极限平板
146米
糟透了 我不想爬了
This sucks. I don’t wanna be here.
我不干了
I’m over it.
怎么了
What happened?
我在下面这块岩壁上歇着了
I cheated on the slab down there.
不妨对讲一下
Might as well radio it.
你想和他对话吗
Do you wanna talk to him?
我甚至不知道该说什么 有点尴尬
I don’t even know what to say, it’s, like, kind of embarrassing.
对讲机那边的 不管是谁 我是亚历克斯
Uh, hey, whoever’s on the radio, this is Alex.
我要放弃了
Um, I think I’m bailing.
等等 你能重复一遍吗
Wait, could you repeat?
他想从波特平台处放弃
I think he’s bailing from Heart.
从波特平台处放弃 没错
Bailing from Heart, that’s correct.
有点令人困扰
It’s kind of disturbing.
我想知道是怎么回事
Yeah, I wonder what it was.
我不知道我能不能在众目睽睽之下攀岩
I don’t know if I can try with everybody watching.
太可怕了
It’s too scary.
没法真正尝试冒险
Just can’t, like, try for real.
-哦天哪 -早上好
– Oh, my gosh. – Good morning.
你怎么了
What are you doing?
哦 我放弃了
Oh, I bailed.
放弃了
You bailed,
外面太冷了
Yeah, it’s chilly outside.
太冷了 好吧
It’s chilly, okay.
好
Okay.
怎么了
What’s going on?
没什么
Well, not much.
怎么了
What’s up?
我刚刚上到极限平板区 然后我
Oh, I just, I went up to Free Blast and I was, like, nah,
我没再继续了 但是
I’m not gonna’ do it. But…
挺好的
Good for you.
只是有点奇怪 知道吗
Yeah, well, it’s just a little weird, you know?
-嗯 -嗯 -不
– Yup. – Yeah. – No.
我是说那里有太多
Right, I mean there’s just too many random,
太多无关的人和工作人员 诸如此类