科学怪狗

Look, I don’t know what you think I know,
但我不知道
but I don’t know it.
你的狗活过来了
Your dog is alive!
-那怎么可能 -我知道
– That’s impossible. – I know.
我知道这很不可思议 但你做到了
I know it is so impossible, but you did it.
你做到了
You did it!
所以告诉我怎么做 不然我就告诉别人
So, show me how, or I’ll tell everyone.
弗兰肯斯坦太太
Oh, Mrs. Frankenstein!
我可以要块饼干吗
May I have a cookie, please?
当然可以
Oh. Yes, of course.
好吧 跟我来
All right, come on.
我觉得风和闪电是有联♥系♥的
I think the wind and the lightning are part of the same thing,
都是一种神秘的力量
some kind of strange force.
但只有风还不够
But the wind isn’t strong
不足以让动物复活
enough to bring an animal back from the dead.
还得靠闪电
For that, you need lightning.
什么时候让我试试
So when can I do it?
不行 这不是实验 是为了我的狗
You can’t. This isn’t an experiment. It’s my dog.
演和说 维克多
Show-and-tell, Victor.
你演示给我 我就不说出去
You show me, and I won’t tell.
要什么吗 孩子
Can I help you, young man?
我想买♥♥条鱼
I’d like to buy a fish.
好的 要哪条
Certainly. Which one?
这条
This one.
我们现在做什么
What do we do now?
它怎么了 你做了什么
What happened to it? What did you do?
我不知道 应该管用的
I don’t know. It should have worked.
它变透明了 这是条隐形金鱼
It’s invisible. It’s an invisible goldfish.
-怎么会变透明呢 -我也不知道
– Why is it invisible? – I have no idea.
你不能告诉别人 知道吧
You can’t tell anyone. You understand that, right?
在我们弄清楚怎么回事之前都不能说
Not until we figure out how it works.
好 好
Okay, Okay.
-保证吗 -保证
– Promise? – Promise.
我们怎么可能看得见一条隐形的鱼
How are we supposed to see an invisible goldfish?
放只手指进去 你能摸到它的
Put your finger in. You can feel it.
它咬我
Ah! It bit me!
让我看看
Let me see it.
这是我的科学项目 这可是高级机密
It’s my science project, and it’s top secret!
是吗 我们的科技节项目比你的帅多了
Yeah? Well, our science fair project is even cooler.
-你做的什么 -双重高级机密
– What is it? – Double top secret.
海猴子
Sea-Monkeys?
我们得想个更棒的项目
We got to come up with something better.
-更大的项目 -我知道
– Bigger. – I know.
还有两天就是科技节了
The science fair is in two days.
我知道
I know.
-咱俩就你聪明 -我知道
– You’re the smart one! – I know.
好了 安静地坐好
Okay, okay. Sit still. Shh.
斯巴克 不行 不行
Sparky, no! Shh. No! Shh!
抱歉 小家伙 不能再冒险让别人看到你
Sorry, boy, but we can’t risk anyone seeing you again.
年明说你有条隐形鱼
Toshiaki says you have an invisible fish.
-不 他没说 -那你没有咯
– No, he didn’t. – So, you don’t?
我可没这么说 谁说我有的
I didn’t say that. Who said I did?
年明说那是你科技节的参展项目
Toshiaki says it’s your science fair project.
就算是 我也不能告诉你
If it was, I couldn’t tell you.
到底是假的
So it isn’t,
还是真的
or it is?
不是 是
No. Yes.
我糊涂了
I’m confused.
你有没有一条隐形鱼
Do you have an invisible fish?
好吧
Okay.
但你一定得保密
But you have to keep it a secret.
手指伸进来 你能摸到它
Swish your finger around. You can feel it.
就是水罢了 什么都没有
It’s just water. There’s nothing there.
不不 鱼是隐形的
No, it’s invisible.
我不知道你和维克多耍的是什么把戏
I don’t know what kind of game you and Victor are playing,
但我肯定会赢得奖杯的
but that trophy will be mine.
维克多
Victor.
我的鱼出问题了
Something’s wrong with my fish!
-怎么了 -它不在了
– What is it? – It’s not there any more.
说不定就是跳出去了 你盖好盖子了吗
Maybe it just hopped out. Did you have the lid on it?
盖了 从
Yes, ever since
从你家走之后都盖着呢
since I left your house.
我昨天睡觉时它还在呢
I mean, it was there when I went to bed.
我觉得可能它们都不能持久存在
I’m thinking maybe they don’t last.
只能复活一段时间 然后就消失了
They’re only there for a little bit and then they’re gone.
不要 斯巴克
No! Sparky!
斯巴克
Sparky!
别担心 这个我也能修好
Don’t worry. I can fix that, too.
晚安 小家伙
Good night, boy.
你确定这个管用
Are you sure this is going to work?
不确定 所以才叫实验
No. That’s why it’s called an “Experiment.”
我们得收集数据
We have to collect data.
非得用我来收集吗
Do we have to collect it on me?
-准备好了吗 -没有
– Ready? – No.
10 9 8
Ten, nine, eight,
我们可以用试验假人什么的
We could use a test dummy or something.
7 6 5
seven, six, five,
电脑模拟也行
Computer simulation.
4 3 2
four, three, two,
-我想尿尿 -1
– I have to pee! – one.
成功了 成功了
It’s working! It’s working!
新荷兰救护车
你们在房♥顶搞什么鬼呢
What were you boys doing on the roof?
-科学 -科学
– Science. – Science.
新荷兰联合学区
今晚7:00召开家长会 欢迎参加
作为新荷兰的市长
As mayor of New Holland,
我肩负保障大家安全的责任
you have entrusted me with your safety.
因此不能坐视不理某教师危害我们的孩子
So I can’t sit idly while a teacher endangers our children.
他是个毒瘤
The man is a menace!
她说得对 那人是个疯子
She’s right! He’s crazy!
你们看过他们现在的科学课本吗
Have you looked through this science book they’re using?
貌似冥王星都不再是行星了呢
Apparently Pluto isn’t good enough to be a planet any more.
我小时候 冥王星好得很呢
When I was a kid, Pluto was a great planet.
这家伙忽然冒出来 乱改规矩
This guy comes along and rewrites the rules!
说句公道话 课本不是他写的
In fairness, he didn’t write the textbook.
市长先生 我是爱德华·弗兰肯斯坦
Mr. Mayor, Edward Frankenstein.
你的邻居 不用说了
Your neighbor, of course.
我只想说 我们的儿子维克多
I just would like to say that our son Victor
对这位新教师非常崇拜
is just crazy about the new teacher.
认为他很棒
Thinks he’s great.
我的辛西娅总是问一些
My Cynthia has been asking
稀奇古怪的东西
all sorts of strange questions
那些东西我连听都没听过
about things I’ve never even heard of.
我们至少该给他个解释的机会吧
Shouldn’t we at least give the man a chance to explain himself?
是的
Yes.
请上台 毒瘤先生
Please come up, Mr. Menace.
女士们 先生们
Ladies, gentlemen.
产生这种困惑的原因是你们都太无知了
I think the confusion here is that you are all very ignorant.
这个词没用错吧 无知
Is that right word, “Ignorant”?
意思是 愚蠢 落后 未开化
I mean “Stupid,” “Primitive,” “Unenlightened.”
你们不懂科学 所以心生恐惧
You do not understand science, so you are afraid of it.
就像狗害怕雷电或气球一样
Like a dog is afraid of thunder or balloons.
对你们来说 科学就是魔法和巫术
To you, science is magic and witchcraft
因为你们的才智实在 实在太有限
because you have such, such small minds.
我无法拓展你们的才智
I cannot make your heads bigger,
但你们的孩子 我可以用力撬开他们的脑壳
but your children’s heads, I can take them and crack them open.
这就是我要做的 发掘他们的头脑
This is what I try to do, to get at their brains!
天哪
Oh, my.
谢谢
Thank you.
老天啊
Oh, jeez.
快点 小家伙 他们随时都会回来
Be quick, boy. They’ll be home any minute.