四个房间（1995）

我在托潘加的家的电♥话♥号♥码
My number in Topanga.
给我打电♥话♥？
Call me?
我当然会找你
Sure, baby. I’ll call you.
– 这有什么用？
– 这个……嗯……这是桦树枝
– What’s that used for?
– This is, um… It’s a birch branch.
它代表永恒的生命
It symbolizes eternal life.
– 现在我是女人了
– 妙极了
– I’m a woman now.
– Marvelous.
在星界旅行时我用这个树皮来煎茶
I use this bark for a tea which assists in astral travel.
哦，天啊，哦，天啊，我要当女巫
Oh, my God. Oh, my God. I wanna be a witch.
– 好极了
– 好
– 你是了
– Great.
– Okay.
– You are.
我们就在这大锅里做的
We did it right there in the big cauldron.
好，太好了
Great. Great.
雅典娜
Athena.
黛安娜女神，我献上……
Goddess Diana, I offer to you…
我努力得来的精♥液♥……
the jism of the one I wooed for you,
你再不用困在这儿……
so you may live and know such bliss…
可再获鱼水之欢
as getting laid by a guy like this.
[ Women Moaning ]
天灵灵，地灵灵
So mote it be.
三乘三乘三
[ All ] Three times three times three.
Ah.
[ Chuckling ]
[ Chuckling ]
[ Ethereal Breathing, Moaning ]
等一分钟！对！
– [ Buzzing ]
– [ Man On Phone ] Just a minute! Yeah!
– 门房♥部
– 等等，哪……哪间房♥？
– Room service.
– Wait. W-W-What room is this?
这里是前台，先生
-[ Disco ]
– This is the front desk, sir.
– 我们在哪？
– 我也不知道，伙计，我刚到这里
– W-What room we in?
– I don’t know, man. I just got here.
我想是四零四号♥房♥
404. It’s room 404, I think.
– 我觉得我们是在五楼
– 对了！是409房♥，对
– Look, I thought we were on the fifth floor.
– All right! 409. Yeah.
嗯，先生？
[ Ted ] Hmm, sir?
嘿，他在跟我说话吗？
Hey, is he talkin’ to me?
– 听着，我们是在404号♥房♥
– 好的
– Look, 404. We’re in room 404.
– Yeah.
– 有什么需要？先生
– 我们要什么？
– What do you need, sir?
– What do we need? What do we need?
– 冰，冰
– 冰
– Ice. Ice.
– Ice.
– 冰？
– 冰，对，冰！
– Ice?
– Ice. Yeah, ice!
好的，先生，404，先生，冰块，先生
Right, sir. 404, sir. Ice, sir.
冰很快便送上
I’ll be with you momentarily.
喔，迪斯科
Ooh. Disco.
四零四号♥房♥~找错人
喂？
[ Knocks On Door ] Hello.
有人吗？
– [ Door Creaks Shut ]
– Anybody there?
你期待的是什么，西奥多……
[ Man ] What’d you expect, Theodore,
一场操蛋的地板表演？
a fuckin’ floor show?
啊！
– [ Pistol Cocks ]
– Aah!
嗯……
Um,
这是四零四号♥房♥吗？
is this room 404?
很明显，我来得很不是时候
– [ Chomping Pills ]
– Obviously I’ve come at a very bad time.
咱们就别在你没有时间概念这个事实上争论了
Let’s not beleaguer the fact that you have no sense of timing.
事实是……你来了……
The fact is, you’re here,
而且我想不出对你来说，还有什么比除夕……
and I couldn’t think of a better time for you…
to introduce me to your beau than on New Year’s Eve.
更好的时机给我介绍你的情郎了
这明显是搞错了
There’s obviously been a big mistake.
我的名字是西奥多，不错
My name is Theodore. Yes.
我是门房♥
– I’m the bellhop.
– [ Smack ]
[ Baby Crying ]
[ Crying Continues ]
Yoo-hoo. Lover boy.
哟嗬，情郎
废话少说，好吗？
Let’s cut to the chase, okay?
是不是认错了人还是怎么的？
Is this about another man or something?
– [ Choking ]
– Let’s get our ABC’s right here, Theodore.
我们把话说清楚，西奥多
你是西奥多，对吗？
– Theodore, right?
– [ Chokes ]
叫我泰德吧[“泰德”是“西奥多”的昵称]
[ Croaking ] Ted’s better.
泰德……好吧
Ted. Okay.
你是说我太太背叛我了吗？
Are you saying my wife cheats on me?
[ Wheezes ]
Come here.
过来
西奥多
Theodore.
这大概是我们三人所能达到的最亲密的情境：
This is about as intimate a situation as you can get:
你……
you,
我，和安洁拉
me, Angela here.
真是密切，对吧？
Pretty cozy, isn’t it?
现在……
Now,
我要求你道歉
I demand an apology.
哦，操！
– [ Phone Rings ]
– Oh, shit!
[ Rings ]
怎么了？
What?
[ Muffled Muttering ]
– 呣呣，呣呣
– 我们这里没有针筒，孩子……
– Mm-mmm. Mm-mmm.
– We ain’t got no needles here, kid,
只有一支要命的大枪
just a big fuckin’ gun.
– 这有没有吓着你？
– 嘘
– How’s that grab ya?
– Shh.
再见，婴儿
– Ciao, bambino.
– [ Hangs Up Phone ]
现在……
Now…
我说到那里了？
where was I?
啊，啊，对了
Ah. Ah, yeah.
我想起来了
I remember.
[ Man Clears Throat ]
现在……
Now…
这个……
this…
给我那个，给我那个
Gimme that. Gimme that.
不，这是坏主意。跟着我说
No. Bad idea. Say the following.
过来，过来
Come here. Come here.
“我……”
“I…”
– “我……”
– 我……
– “I,”
– I,
– “西奥多……”
– 西奥多……
– “Theodore,”
– Theodore,
– “必须谦卑地……”
– 谦卑……
– must humbly…
– humbleh…
– 谦卑地！谦卑地！
– 谦卑地，谦卑地
– Humbly! Humbly!
– Humbleh. Humbly.
– “和诚挚地……”
– 诚挚地……
– “And sincerely…”
– And sincerely…
– 道歉……
– 歉……
– apologize…
– polgize…
– 道歉！
– 歉……
– Apologize!
– Polgi…
– 道歉，道歉
– 道歉，道歉
– Apologize.
– Apologize. Apologize.
– “为说了……”
– 说了……
– “For saying…”
– Saying…
说我♥操♥了另一个人
saying that I fucked another man.
– 我……
– 说我♥操♥了另一个人！
– That…
– Saying that I fucked another man!
说我♥操♥了另一个人
Saying that I fucked another man.
对了
Great.
满意了吗？
Satisfied?
呃，你接受这道歉吗？
Uh, do you accept the fuckin’ apology?
哦
[ Sighs ] Oh.