直到有一天…
Until one day…
理论上我是个艺术家，但我现在在当服务员
Artist, in theory. Waitress in practice.
然后现在，我在寻找
And now, [several voices] I’m looking for…
我在寻找
I’m looking for [repeats]
他们有四只眼睛
They have four eyes
两张嘴
They have two mouths
八根肢端
They have eight limbs
他们把自己包裹在自恋的自我崇拜中
that wrap around themselves in narcissistic self adoration.
真恶心
It’s disgusting,
但我真控制不了的嫉妒他们
and I can’t help but envy them.
【阿林和三个人上过床】
[Arin has had sex with 3 people]
时长实在好短，我都没来得及体会到什么感觉
It was really short, and not long enough for me to get anything out of it.
只是证实了我一直以来对自己的猜测
It just confirmed for me what I’ve really always known about myself.
我一直在跟我碰见的所有人抱怨
I was telling everyone I met that it was so sad
为什么我活这么久从来没人给我送过一朵百合花
how no one in my entire life had ever given me a lily
哎呀，他就在我门口放了一朵呢
Well, he left a lily on my doorstep
这…真的很温暖
which was… nice.
但我有个守则就是，如果跟人做♥爱♥
And I have this rule that if I have sex with somebody
唔…他们一定得给我口
well… they have to eat my pussy.
但他告诉我，他给他妈发了誓
And he tells me that he promised his mom
假如没有保护措施，他是不会跟人口♥交♥的
that he wouldn’t have oral sex without protection.
他坦白他起码三年都没跟人上过床了
He confessed that he hadn’t had sex in 3 years
这实在说明了很多咯
which explains a lot
我也不知道…
I don’t know…
哎呀这就是挺怪的
It was weird.
唔…
Well…
其实吧，嗯…
actually, uh…
他当时还是个处♥男♥呢
he was still a virgin
我猜啊，他是觉得跟一孕妇做♥爱♥怪恶心的
I guess he thought it was gross that I was pregnant
但我还是跟他说，我是真不知道我有没有怀孕
eventually I just told him that I didn’t even know if I was pregnant
我们就继续进行下去，基本就是他在那…
so, we went ahead… which actually consisted of him messing around with…
那啥…
uh…
鼓捣了五分钟避孕套
messing around with the condom for about 5 minutes
然后做了十五秒吧大概
and then it lasted maybe 15 seconds
大卫和约翰尼到现在还在否认萨拉可能是他俩的孩子
and David and Johnny were still denying that Sarah was their baby
我还在等肖恩退伍
and I was still waiting for Shawny to get out of the army
因为跟他都商量好了到时候住一起什么的…
because we had made all these plans to move in with each other…
反正现在就是这么个情况
so that’s what I did.
嗯…当时跟阿林住一起呢，就是因为
But… yeah… with Arin, I mean, that was it.
我被从我自己的公♥寓♥里赶出来
I just moved in with Arin because
所以就搬进来跟他住了
I had been kicked out of my apartment.
【猫猫愤怒打闹】我1米76，55公斤重
[cat fighting meows] I’m 5 foot 8, 123 pounds,
阿林发，蓝眼睛
blond hair, blue eyes
小学二年级的时候拿过个什么“斯塔尔之星”呢
I won the “Stahl Star” award in 2nd grade
五年级又拿了一次
and again in 5th grade.
七年级的时候成功说服了爸妈把我送去模特学校
By 7th grade I had convinced my parents to send me to modeling school
成功♥学♥到了模特的型和范
where I learned to look and feel like a model,
接着搞了个绘画的学位
I went on to get a BFA in painting,
然后就搬到了现在这个可爱的城市里来咯
and then I moved to this lovely city where I currently reside,
追寻我成为伟大艺术家的梦
pursuing an artist career.
来个烤奶酪加番茄
Grilled cheese with tomato
这还有烤奶酪哪
They have grilled cheese
我推荐芝士通心粉
I suggest mac and cheese
这里有面包吧 – 嗯呐
You have bread, right ? -Yup.
有芝士吗 – 有的 – 那不就得了？？
You have cheese ? -Yeah. -Well ?
【干我】
[ Fuck me ]
【口我】
[ Blow me ]
不好意思，你在工作吗
Sorry, working?
没，我搞完了
No, I’m finished.
几千块扔在艺术学校打水漂了
Thousands of dollars wasted on art school.
克里斯汀，我爱你！
Christine! I love you!
你温暖了我
Because your energy warms me,
我喜欢你的勇敢
you’re brave, I love your courage.
你让我看到了生活美丽的一面
Because you make me understand that things can be better in my life,
我们也能一起这样成长
and it’s something we can grow with.
我爱你因为你让我抑制不了的微笑
I love you because you make me smile,
因为你让我充满激♥情♥
because you make me passionate,
因为我也让你充满激♥情♥
because I make you passionate.
我觉得咱俩完全能够拥有一段圆♥满♥的婚姻
I think you and I have what it takes to make a success of this,
所以我今天在这里跟你求婚
so that’s what I propose to you,
我现在就要大声告诉你:
that’s what I want to put on the table.
克里斯汀，你愿意嫁给我吗？
Christine, will you marry me?
克里斯汀，你愿意嫁给我吗？
Christine, will you marry me?
克里斯汀，我爱你，我爱你，我爱你
I love you Christine, I love you Christine, I love you Christine,
嫁给我吧，克里斯汀
Christine, marry me.
克里斯汀，请你嫁给我！
Christine! Will you marry me!
你好啊，我叫卡拉邦德，我想请你来给我的婚礼录像
Hi there, my name is Carla Bond, and I was interested in you perhaps filming my wedding,
唔我跟你讲，我有个朋友在做一个小项目，那种小短片
uhm listen I have a friend who is doing a little project, a video project,
唔那个，这是我爸妈的四十周年结婚纪念日
uhm, it’s my parents 40th wedding anniversary,
我打算给我的宝贝小狗准备一个生日派对
I am throwing a birthday party, for my little baby, my doggy,
一个影像计划，想把它弄成个碟
a video project, I want to get a DVD,
所以嘞，重点是你想想那些会看到你作品的观众啊，别净考虑钱
so it’s more about who is going to see you and your work than it is about the money,
– 我号♥码是912859 – 记得打91730403 给我回电♥话♥
call me back at nine one seven, three, zero, four, zero, three, 91285,
谢谢
Thanks.
这啥玩意？
What’s that?
我在弄的一个小东西
Just something I’m trying to work on.
这谁的腿啊
Whose legs are those?
从一个朋友那借的
I borrowed them from a friend.
我以为你剪婚礼录像呢
I thought you were working on wedding videos.
歇会不行吗
I’m on a break.
都失焦啦
It’s out of focus.
其实这是个变焦
It’s actually a rack focus.
啥啊 – 变焦
A what? -A rack focus.
噢好，给你穿这个
Oh. Wear that,
这是我的战服
that’s my pussy shirt.
【哈喽】
[ What’s up ]
【你看上去挺好，我想知道你住哪呢，愿意和我换点别的照片看看嘛，我觉得你挺性感的，阿林】
[You seem to have a good attitude, where do you live, lets exchange a few more pics if you have any, I think i might find you hot, Arin]
[random female voices speaking]
【已发送：112】
[ SENT : 112 ]
【收件箱：0】
[ IN BOX : 0 ]
你看上去挺好，我想知道你住哪呢
You seem to have a good attitude, where do you live,
愿意和我换点别的照片看看嘛，我觉得你挺性感的
let’s exchange a few more pics if you have any, I think I might find you hot.
我没有别的照片能给你看的
I don’t have any other pictures I can send,
而且说真的，我再也不想浪费一大堆时间跟网上的人扯闲谈
Besides, i don’t want to waste a bunch of time getting to know people through the Internet anymore.
压根没用的
It doesn’t work.
我在一个叫膪的餐馆上夜班
I work the overnight in a restaurant called Tri
有空可以上那看看我
You should just stop by
嗨！
Hey!
有什么可以帮您的吗？
Can I help you?
我是网上的那个家伙
I’m that guy from the Internet
还是算了…
No…
嗯呐…
No…
唔，反正感谢你过来看我
Well, thanks for stopping by.
嗯哪，下次有机会再见
Yeah I’ll see you around sometime.
嗯，好的
Yeah, okay
【亲爱的女儿，你现在有没有一个事业计划呢】
[ Dear Daughter, do you have a career plan yet, ]
【要去读研吗？】
[ are you going to go to Grad school?? ]
【回家待会？？？】
[ Move home for a bit??!! ]
【爸妈新养的猫猫会开心死的，如果多个人陪它】
[ Our new kitten would be thrilled for more company! ]
【爱你的，爹妈】
[ Love, Mom and Dad ]
【亲爱的艺术家们，欢迎来到佛蒙特工作室】
[ DEAR ARTIST, COME TO STUDIO VERMONT, ]
【播放录像】
[ PLAY VIDEO ]
这里是佛蒙特工作室
Studio Vermont Residency.
我朋友的爱人去世了，留下了这个大农舍
My friends lover died and left him this farmhouse
之后我们把它拆掉了，就变成了现在的大厅，我们当时就觉得
which we have since knocked down and we created the main hall and we decided
嗨，我们为什么不直接做个给人们逃离混乱城市的避难所
hey, lets create a home where people could create outside of all the chaos of the city
好多人都觉得他们每天朝九晚五上班
a lot of people think that they can go to work and work their 9 to 5
回来之后往画布上甩点颜料就是艺术了
and come home and throw some paint on a canvas and that’s art,
根本不是啊
it’s not.
车喇叭，噪音，各种各样的声音，静电，混乱
Car horns, noise, sounds, static, chaos,
没法在这样的环境下创造呀