寻找薇薇安·迈尔

I think she really wanted to be brought in
加入我们这个家庭 但是
to be a member of our family, but that…
那跟我想的并不一样
wasn’t really what I had bargained for.
到了
So there it is.
在这栋小屋 迈尔小姐住楼上
In this little house, Miss Maiers lived upstairs.
我父亲把他的办公室上面的房♥间给她住
My father did provide a room for her above his office.
我只看过一次
I only had a chance to see it once,
有一次我偷偷跟随她
back when I snuck up behind her,
因为她一直禁止别人进去
’cause she kept a padlock on it.
现在完全不一样了
So, yeah, this is totally different.
这是当时的禁区
This was the forbidden zone.
谁都不准看迈尔小姐住的地方
No one was allowed to see where Miss Maiers lived.
迈尔小姐走进去
Miss Maier went in there,
她打开门时我看得到
and she left the door open enough for me to see,
房♥间堆的满满 从地板到天花板
and the room was literally filled, floor to ceiling,
全是报纸
with newspapers.
看到地板怎么是倾斜的
See how the floor is sloped?
我告诉我爸 他说
I told my dad, and he said,
“为什么地板会斜这么大”
“That’s why the floor is sagging so much.”
他最后只好弄了个工字钢梁
He ended up having to put a steel Ibeam post
在他办公室顶着 因为地板倾斜了
in his office because the floor was sagging.
他不知道为什么
He didn’t know why.
真的是太满了
It was just totally full.
这层楼是薇薇的领域
This floor was Viv’s domain.
我就想也许趁她不在家时
It occurred to me that maybe I would need to go up there
应该上去看看
when she wasn’t home,
她不情愿地给了我钥匙 所以我就进去了
so she grudgingly gave me a key, and so I went in.
你可以看到她走的路径
You can tell where she had been walking,
只有这么窄的小通路
and it was just this narrow path
只能这样横着过
that you could just barely traverse like this.
床会放在哪里呢
And where would the bed have been?
就这里
Right here.
报纸几乎堆到天花板了
Stacks of newspapers almost to the ceiling.
你或许以为我夸大其词
You may think I’m exaggerating.
绝对没有
No, I am not.
就是堆啊 堆啊 堆啊 堆啊 堆啊
Just stacked, stacked, stacked, stacked, stacked,
堆得到处都是
stacked everywhere.
报纸堆得很高
High you know, high stacks of paper.
她是怎么取得报纸的…
How she even could get to the paper…
我实在不知道那些报纸她看过多少
I don’t even know how much she even looked at the paper.
我也发现她在房♥子外头 别的地方
I began to see that she was stacking newspaper
的地下室也堆了许多报纸
elsewhere in the house in the basement,
后边 我们后边有个小通路
and in the back, we have a little back entryway,
她也把报纸堆在那外头
and she would stack newspaper out there.
她常常会想到
Now, the idea was always
把她那天收集到的文章
that there were articles she wanted to save
剪下来
for the day when she did get around
并保存下来
to cutting out the parts that she wanted to keep.
这让我很烦恼 但是
It concerned me, but…
我也想 “算了吧 算了吧”
I thought, “Whatever. Whatever.”
我载她去她上班的地方
I gave her a ride to her place of employment.
我看到她的桌上堆积成山
I looked at her desk and piles of stuff there.
她知道雇主
She was certain that her employers
会进去她房♥间
were coming into the room she had
查看她的东西
and going through her items.
她会把书或别的东西放在桌上
She would rig the books and so forth on her desk
所以书一旦被动过
so that if they were moved half an inch,
她回来时就会发现
she would know that when she got back.
这大约就是薇薇安的故事
Or so that was Vivian’s story.
她也常常认为
And she was also certain
有些人拿望远镜看
that people were looking through binoculars
会从她房♥间窗户看进去
and could see through the window of her room.
她变得越来越孤独
She was progressively getting more and more reclusive,
越来越像隐士
more and more of a hoarder.
大家都在说 “我的天呐
Everybody was saying resoundingly, “My God.
“你必须辞掉你的保姆”
“You’ve got to get rid of your nanny.”
我不认为爸妈能意识到
I don’t think that Mom and Dad really realized
她的精神疾病有多糟糕
the extent to which she was living with mental illness,
因为很糟糕
’cause she was.
很糟糕 很糟糕
She was. She was.
她…她…
She… she, um…
是有点古怪
Yeah, it was a little past eccentric.
我的邻居过来
My neighbor came over.
他说”我在粉刷浴室
He said, “I’m painting the bathroom.
“你有没有一堆报纸”
“Do you have a stack of newspaper?”
我说 “有啊”
I said, “Sure.”
后门正好有一大堆
There was a huge stack right by the back door.
我给他大概有这么多
I gave him a big chunk like this.
我说 “尽管拿吧”
I said, “Sure. Go ahead.”
当薇薇安回到家
Well, when Viv came home, she saw
看到报纸变少了
that that stack of newspaper was shorter
差不多有两三英尺
by three feet or two feet or whatever,
她既震惊也愤怒
and she was angry and horrified.
“谁拿了我的报纸 谁拿了我的报纸”
“Who took my papers? Who took my papers?”
然后她开始变得狂躁
And she just went berserk.
我是说开始抓狂
I mean, she went crazy.
我记得她有大喊大叫
I remember an outside scene with screaming and yelling
她对着那人叫喊 要他把报纸还回来
where she’s yelling at this guy, telling him to bring them back,
可是有的被刷过或扯破了
but some already had paint on them and were ripped.
“它们都被涂刷过了
“Now they’re all covered with paint!
“这下都没用了
“Now I can’t use those papers.
“上面都是油漆
“They’re covered with paint now.
“你怎么可以把我的报纸给他”
“How could you give him my papers?”
我只说 “薇薇 这些可不是你的报纸
So I said l just said, “Viv, those aren’t your papers.
“而是我的
“Those are my papers,
“这屋子里报纸过于多了”
“and there are too many papers in this house.”
我记得我父母跟我说过
I remember my parents telling me,
“薇薇不能再和我们住了
“Viv’s not gonna be with us anymore.
“她变得太疯狂了”
“She’s gotten too crazy.”
其实不是真的发疯
Like, not that she wasn’t already crazy
但是抓狂越来越严重
but that the craziness has increased
到了我们无法容忍♥的地步
to a level that we can’t tolerate anymore.
我清楚记得我跟她说 “薇薇
I remember so clearly having to say to her, “Viv”,
“我觉得你该去找别的工作了”
“I think you’re going to have to look for another job.”
跟她讲这个真是很为难
How hard it was to say that to her.
但你知道吗
But you know what?
我没想到她一点都不讶异
I don’t think she was even surprised.
她回头看着我说
She looked back at me, and she said,
“你确定” 她说
“Do you?” she said.
“你确定” 她说
“Do you?” she said.
“那我想要两个月的补贴
“Well, then, what I want is two months’ notice
“和两个月的薪水” 大概就这样
“and two months’ pay” or something like that.
她开出她的条件
She gave me hersort of what she wanted
就像早就计划好了一样
as if she had it on the tip of her tongue
然后说出来
and she’d figured it out.
我不知道她这么做是否因为
And I didn’t know whether that was because
她常常被解雇
she had been dismissed from positions often enough
所以知道该说些什么
that she knew what to say
或者她已多多少少预感到
or whether she had, in a way, anticipated it.
我丈夫和我跟孩子
My husband and I and our children,
在她离开之后 就马上跳上汽车
after she was gone, do you know we just jumped in the car
开往密西根
and drove up to Michigan,
这是我们不曾做过的
which is something we never used to do,
正因为这是件令人动情的事情
just because it was a huge emotional thing
没有了她
not to have her
这仍然会让我想哭
you know, see, I’m still weepy about it,
因为我真的很在意薇薇安
because I really cared about Viv,
我也觉得她在意我们
and I think she cared about us,
这是她和我们
and it was just one of those things
相处得不是很好的众多原因中的一个
where she was a person who didn’t fit in very well.
她有许多优点