好 我要你深呼吸
Okay,I’m going to ask you to take a deep breath in.
然后呼气
And you can let it go.
再继续吸气吗
Should I do it again?
不用 一次就够了
No,one is good.
知道为什么生气吗 上个星期二 有个筹款人
upset about? Apparently last tuesday we had this fundraiser
带的是棒棒糖蛋糕 而我带的是纸杯蛋糕
…and I brought cupcakes,she brought cake pops.
她的意思 好像是干吗跟我带一样的
And she’s like,”That’s too similar.”
我说 哪里 纸杯蛋糕就是纸杯蛋糕
I’m like,”No,a cupcake is a cupcake.
棒棒糖蛋糕是有跟棍子插住的
A cake pop is cake with a stick in it.”
辛西娅 你要挪一下
Cynthia? I’m going to ask you to scooch down the table now…
嗯 嗯 再翻下身
Mmm-hmm….and turn over,please.
我们都是成年人了 还在为蛋糕争个你死我活的
We are grown women and we’re fighting about cake pops.
你懂我的意思 这也没什么好说的 不过问题是
You know I mean let’s get over it already! But the real issue is…
她女儿艾丽西亚是个好孩子
…her daughter Alicia is a very nice girl,
虽然不聪明 可是我的女儿安娜
but not very smart,whereas my daughter Anna…
你好啊 伊娃 见到你真好
Hey,Eva. Nice to see you.
嘿 上来吧
Hey. Come on up.
还好吗
How’s everything?
-不错 -那就好
-Great. -Alright.
让一下
Excuse me.
嘿 妈妈
Hey,Mom.
你去哪
Where are you going?
陪莎拉和威尔去个派对
To a party with Sarah and Will,
他们就不会无聊了
so they don’t have to be alone.
你想去吗
You wanna come?
为什么
Why?
因为你快走了 我想陪你啊
Because you’re leaving soon,and I want to be with you.
我很好 谢谢
I’m good,thanks.
-玩的开心 -谢谢 亲爱的
-Have fun. -Thanks,honey.
我们快疯了
She’s driving us totally crazy.
东西永远不知道在哪
We can’t find anything.
她都放在乱七八糟的地方
She puts things in the weirdest places.
就好像 我放在厨房♥的手镯
Like,if I leave my bracelet in the kitchen,
她就会帮我扔到柜子里去
she’ll put it in a kitchen drawer!
你为什么不能狠点心呢
Why can’t you just do it?
我经常做 我炒了园丁 你这么说太不公平了
I always do it. I fired the gardener. It’s not fair.
我想要炒了她 他不愿意
We want to fire her,and he won’t do it.
对你来说轻而易举 干吗要求公平
It’s not hard for you. Why does it have to be fair?
你觉得难为情你就去做
You should do it because it’s hard for you.
噢 别扯了
Oh,please.
莎拉 你是个成年人了 我看好你
Come on,Sarah. You’re a grownup. You can fire a maid.
成熟对你来说
That’s the definition of maturity?
就是炒了你那该死的仆人咯
Being able to fire your friggin’ maid?
莎拉 这颜色怎么样
Sarah,is this color good on me?
很好 很配你
You look good. You look pretty.
很好看 看上去不错
That’s good. That’s a nice look.
话说谁举办的这个派对
Whose party is this,anyway?
他是个编辑 她是室内设计师 他们人缘很好
He’s a book editor and she’s an interior designer. They know everybody.
-也许有黄金单身汉哦 -做梦吧
-Maybe some single men are here. -No.
哦 糟糕 有个病号♥
Oh,shit,I see a patient.
-你想干吗 -指给我看看
-Oh,what you gonna do? -Will you show me?
-别想了 -给我看看是哪个
-No way. -Will you show me which one is it.
-给我介绍介绍 -不 别看了
-Come on,introduce me. -Stop looking. No.
天啊 你太扫兴了
God,you’re such a wet blanket.
哦 看 我的客户在那 太巧了
Oh,look it! There’s that lady from my gym. What is…
-再见 -拜拜
-Okay,bye. -Bye.
她叫什么来的?
What is her name?
想起来了 希拉里
Oh,it’s Hilary.
希拉里 你好啊
Hilary? Hilary!
伊娃 好啊
Eva! Hi.
你怎么会在这
It’s so weird to see you here.
伊娃 她是玛丽安妮 玛丽安妮 她叫伊娃
Eva,this is Marianne. Marianne,Eva.
-你好 -你好吗
-Hello -How are you?
-很好 -很高兴见到你
-I’m good. -Nice to meet you.
我也是
Nice to meet you.
伊娃的按♥摩♥技术太棒了
Eva is an incredible,incredible masseuse.
-太好了 -谢谢
-Wonderful. -Thank you very much.
抱歉 我得 我得去找个厕所
Excuse me a second. I have,I have to find a bathroom.
她太唐突了
That was abrupt.
哦 天啊 看看你的鞋子和衣服
Oh,my goodness! Look at those shoes and that outfit.
还有包包 简直绝配啊
You got the purse and everything? It looks so nice.
谢谢 我带你逛逛吧
Thank you. I should bring you everywhere.
-你的衣服也很好看啊 -谢谢
-I love your outfit,too. -Oh.
你是按♥摩♥师吗
So you’re a masseuse?
是的
I am,yeah.
哦
Yeah?
你做什么的?
And what is it you do?
我是个诗人
I’m a poet.
哦 我也是空想家
Oh. And I’m a dreamer.
我说真的
No,really.
你真的是诗人啊
You’re really a poet?
对啊
I am.
用来谋生吗
You do it for a living?
-是啊 -太不可思议了
-I do. -Wow!
你用来赚钱 我用来空想 你是个诗人 我懂了
You do,I don’t. You’re a poet,now I know it.
很好
Good one.
想要点子 找我啊
Feel free to steal it.
能帮我拿着吗 谢谢
Can I give that to you? Thank you.
猜猜怎么了
Hi. Guess what?
-怎么了 -我搞到一个新客户
-What? -I think I just got a new client.
是吗 在哪?
Yeah? Where?
哦 那边
Ah,right there.
-她看起来不错 -嗯
-She looks clean. -Yeah
她很幽默风趣 品味不错
She’s really nice and funny,she’s got great taste.
-很迷人 -是的
-And very attractive. -Yeah
你觉得这里的女人都很迷人吧
You probably think all the women here are attractive.
差不多
Pretty much.
帮我拿着 这里没一个能入我法眼的
Hold this. There’s not one man at this party I’m attracted to.
威尔
Will.
嘿 詹森 你好
Hey! Jason! How you doing?
-这是艾伯特 -你好
-This is Albert. -Hi.
-你好 -你好 嘿
-How’s it going? -How are you? Hi.
那么多白色灯泡点缀的派对太棒了
So,this is a nice party. Got all the nice white balls hanging down.
伊娃刚刚说这里没有
Eva was just telling me that there are
一个男人她看得上的
no men at the party she’s attracted to.
好吧
Okay.
我不明白你干吗要说出来 但是
I don’t know why you would make that announcement,but…
真的吗 以前没有过吗
Really? Is that unusual?
不 实际上我一直这样认为 无意冒犯
No,actually,it’s not unusual. No offense.
不 没事 我也是这样觉得的
No,that’s okay. There’s no one here I’m attracted to,either.
嗯 人还挺多的 真的
Yeah,it’s kind of an ugly crowd,really.
詹森 你有个小孩在读大学 对吗
Jason,you have a kid in college,right?
两个 嗯
Two. Yeah.
我的小孩秋天就去上大学了
I have one leaving in the fall.
我的也是
I do,too!
-舍不得啊 -我也是
-That’s all I have. -Me,too.
好吧 你们应该让他们出去闯闯 这样对他们比较好
Come on. Your kids are supposed to go away. That’s healthy.
不要 闭嘴
No. Shut up.
对 闭嘴
Yeah,shut up.
-没有人会有反应吗 -不会
-Do the guys get boners? -No.
-天啊 你还有完没完 -对啊
-Oh god. Haven’t we been over this? -Yes.
一想到按♥摩♥我就紧张
I get so nervous with massages.
一直担心我会勃起
I’m always afraid that I’m going to get a boner.
-你会吗 -绝对 绝对啊
-You are? -Absolutely. Absolutely.
他们会挑逗你吗
Do they hit on you?
好了 你让我恶心了
Okay,you’re starting to depress me.
不 他们不会挑逗我 也不会勃起
No,they don’t hit on me. They don’t get boners,either.
只是有一个人从来不帮我提按♥摩♥椅
I do have one guy who has like a hundred stairs going up to his house…
可是上去他家有一百多个台阶
…and he never helps me carry my massage table.
你有叫他吗
Did you ever ask him to?