也许是真的
Maybe we are.
我从2016到2019就一直寄履历
They never saw the, like, 9 billion resumes I sent from 2016 to 2019.
或是2009大学毕业后寄的履历
Or in 2009, right after I graduated college.
当时他们忙着应付“股市崩♥盘♥”
I guess they were busy with that whole “market crash” thing then.
♪ Send it to a rich nigga… ♪
该死的!
Fuck!
♪ Stack it– ♪
凯文,你这混♥蛋♥
Kevin, you son of a bitch!
你不能抱着小宝宝跑
You can’t run with a baby. You can’t run with a baby!
别偷开我的车 – 我弄脏座椅
Don’t take my car, man! – I fucked up your seat!
没油了
There’s no gas left.
我知道
I know.
– ♪ You in the zone ♪ – ♪ I can be a better man… ♪
“德州大学奥斯汀分校”
那好吃吗?
How did that taste?
我能穿上裤子吗?
Hey-oh, can I put my pants back on?
不行!
No!
挑个玩家,用手摸对方内♥裤♥一分钟
“Choose a player and put your hand down their panties for a whole minute.”
谁有穿内♥裤♥?
Panties, who’s got panties?
不玩就罚喝两杯
“Two shots if they refuse.”
“哈蒙妮威廉斯 负债$186,541”
我有穿内♥裤♥
I mean, I got some panties.
– Ew!
兄弟
Bro.
“芮芮派瑞索”
好吧
Hello. – All right.
“负债$145,182”
好吧 – 妹子
All right. – Hey, girl.
你说罚喝两杯
You said two shots, right?
拜托
Oh, c’mon.
来吧
Fuck, all good.
开始计时 – 没问题
Can someone start the timer? – I got you. I got you.
手直接伸进去…好吧
Should I just…? Okay. – Get in there.
你确定? – 确定
You sure? – Yeah.
好吧
Whoa. Okay…
嗨
Hi.
嗨
Hi.
你好吗?
How are you?
给我闭嘴!
Can you shut the fuck up?
滚啦!
Fuck off!
你今天做了什么?
So what’d you do today?
我参加了一个网络研讨会
Well, I attended a Zoom seminar
结果我看了两小时抖音
during which I watched two hours of TikTok.
– Oh!
我买♥♥了三股股票
I, um, purchased three shares of stock.
哪支股票?
Okay, what stock?
游戏驿站 – 哟,咆哮小猫!
GameStop. – Yo, Roaring Kitty!
拜托,是的,詹姆士
C’mon. Yes, James.
我能穿上裤子吗? – 不行!
Can I please put some pants back on? – No
坐下来 – 我玩了三天
! – Sit down. I’m three days into that shit.
这只是今天买♥♥的,我才不在乎
Look it. That’s just, that’s only from today. I don’t care.
我完全不清楚,只知道赚到钱
I don’t know what the fuck I’m doing. I just know I’m making money.
我不是很信
I’m not sold on that.
从暑假就涨了两倍
It’s doubled since summer.
买♥♥家越多,股价就越高
And the more people who buy in, the higher it’ll go.
听起来就是金字塔骗局
That sounds like the literal definition of a pyramid scheme.
时间到 – 真棒
That’s time. – Bravo!
“迈阿密 佛州”
♪ You make me wanna You make me wanna ♪
♪ You make me wanna You make me wanna ♪
♪ You make me wanna ♪
♪ You make me wanna You make me wanna ♪
♪ You make me wanna… ♪
抱歉,我严重过敏,头也很痛
Sorry, I have terrible allergies. And a killer headache.
可能是因为隔壁的音乐太吵
Could just be the music coming from next door though.
有看到肯持有570亿空头部位吗?
You see your buddy Ken’s up to 57 billion in short positions?
他很聪明,经济暴跌
Yeah, smart. The economy’s in free fall.
– Mmm.
我听不出那是你或罗密欧
I honestly can’t tell if that was you or Romeo.
很好笑
Very funny.
我警告你,他们要杀鸡儆猴了
I’m telling you. This is when they drag out the guillotines.
你太在乎他了 – 他是个混球
You’re obsessed with him. – The man is an asshole.
抢走我五名分♥析♥师,全都很弱
He stole five analysts from me. All mediocre by the way.
还有两幅画
Oh, and two paintings.
什么画? – 毕加索和德库宁
What paintings? – A Picasso and a de Kooning.
他多付了五亿
He overpaid 500 million.
那是我去年的开支
That is my entire nut from last year.
那家伙是个混球
The man is an asshole. Just admit it.
你只是不爽他抢走你的人
You’re just bitter he stole those analysts.
看到城♥堡♥的预估营收吗?
You seen Citadel’s projected revenue?
70亿美元
$7 billion.
去年的两倍
That’s, uh, double last year.
把紧急财政援助款吸干抹净
Hoovering up all the stimulus checks.
钱都从散户手上
They go straight from the retail traders – Thank you.
直接进了肯的口袋
right into Kenny boy’s pockets.
他就算杀人也没事,你看看
The man just gets away with murder. Look at what I just sent you.
这家伙因为股价狂飙喝自己的尿?
Is this a video of a man drinking his own urine because a stock went up?
观看人数第一名
#1 post on the site.
你在哪找到的?
Where did you get this?
我的分♥析♥师传给我
My analysts sent it to me.
他们自称猩猩和智障,可以那么说吗?
They call themselves apes and r-words. Retard, can they say that?
很有自知之明,莫名迷上游戏驿站
Remarkably self-aware. They’ve hooked into GameStop for whatever reason.
他们觉得很好笑吧
They think it’s funny, it seems.
我觉得很好笑
I think it’s funny.
我想他们觉得是好投资
I think they think it’s a good investment.
股市散户永远都会输
Retail traders always lose.
我们从2014就做空游戏驿站
We’ve actually been short GameStop since 2014.
那家公♥司♥经营不善,两年换六个首席执行官
The company is a complete disaster. They’ve had six CEOs in two years.
“我智障?”
这些人不管市场趋势
Guess these guys are ignoring obvious secular market trends.
或者是…地表最笨的蠢蛋
Or they’re… the stupidest people on earth.
你又在做空,对吧?
You’re shorting more right now, aren’t you?
60万股,也许吧
600,000 shares, maybe.
这是笨钱
Dumb money, man.
何乐而不为
I’m happy to take it.
Mmm! Mmm-mmm-mmm!
Mmm-mmm-mmm!
听好了,智障们
Listen up, retards,
梅尔文资本继续做空,向游戏驿站宣战
Melvin Capital has declared war on GME by shorting the stock even more.
我要呼吁各位勇士使出钻石手坚持不卖♥♥
This is our call to activate diamond hands, my fellow warriors.
我们不会被空军击败,我们要飞向月球
We will not let the gay bears defeat us. We are on a mission to the fucking moon.
这件事比赚钱更重要
This is one that is bigger than your personal gains.
比买♥♥全新超跑更重要
More than just tendies for a new Lambo.
我们要揭竿起义,扳倒华尔街大咖
This is our chance to rise up together. To stick it to the big man.
散户小咖要伸出钻石手
Squeezing Melvin by the fucking balls
捏爆梅尔文的蛋蛋
with the collective power of diamond handing autists.
我以为网络股民只是为了好玩
Wall Street Bets I thought were a bunch of idiots just throwing money at a stock
才会狂买♥♥这支股票
because they thought it was funny.
我错了
I was wrong.
现在我知道这是什么
Now I see what Wall Street Bets really is.
这是一场革命 – 这很罕见
It is a revolution. – This is one of those rare moments
华尔街被散户整惨
where Wall Street are the ones getting screwed over.
我们决定要反击,就一定会打趴…
And when we decide we’re hungry, there is very little the rich can do to stop us
有钱人 – 游戏驿站反转游戏规则
from beating them. – It’s a GameStop to stop the game.
权力属于人♥民♥ – 我正在打手♥枪♥
Power to the people. – I’m jerking off right now.
爽歪歪
Jerking off right now.
欢迎进场,拿了钱,快加入我们的行列
So welcome aboard, grab your peanuts, and get the fuck in,
智障
retard.
Ho, ho, ho!
大家好,圣诞快乐、新年快乐
What up, everybody? Merry Christmas, Happy New Year’s, happy holidays. Uh…
2020年…再见了
2020… See ya.
我们家在2020年也是愁云惨雾
2020 has been a very rough year for my family too.
游戏驿站股价狂飙算是拨云见日
So this GameStop news has been a bit of a bright spot.
看看现在的股价
Uh, look at this, I mean, where it’s at.
从去年夏天翻了五倍
It’s a five bagger from where it was over the summer.
很少看到投资理论能真正实现
You don’t often see a thesis play out like this.
不能视为理所当然,要懂得惜福
So we gotta– We can’t take it for granted, right? We gotta appreciate it.
“GME飞向月球”
多谢圣诞老人
Thank you, Santa. Right.
“你是我的偶像”
我想向大家致敬
Uh, I wanted to say cheers all of you.