I just had the strangest dream.
我做了个有生以来最怪的梦
It’s Friday.
那是一个星期五
We’re at the hospital.
我们都在医院
But it’s not a hospital, it’s a forest of sorts.
但又不是医院 还有森林什么的
And I know that because right next to you there’s a bear.
我这么说是因为你身边有只熊
A grizzly, cooling his feet in a stream.
一头灰熊 正用爪子拨着凉爽的溪水
And all of a sudden, you begin to deliver…
突然间 你就要分娩了
…and I can’t get to you.
我却到不了你身边
But the bear can.
但熊可以
And next thing I know…
下一件我记得的事
…he is holding our beautiful baby boy.
就是它抱着我们漂亮的儿子
And here’s where it gets odd. Uh….
事情变得很蹊跷
He chews the cord.
它咬着脐带
But, strangely, I’m okay with it.
更奇怪的是 我对此无动于衷
That’s gotta be a good sign.
希望这是个好兆头
Theodore. Loved it.
西奥多 非常喜欢
But remember that article I told you about
记得我跟你提过那篇
naming kids after famous people?
用名人的名字给孩子起名的文章吗
I don’t want Teddy to think
我不想泰迪觉得
he’s a failure if he doesn’t wind up
如果他的雕像最后没能登上拉什莫尔山
on Mount Rushmore.
他就是废物
Arthur. Oh!
亚瑟
This was tough, because Arthur is mythological.
这真是难 亚瑟是神话人物
Round Table, the whole deal.
那个圆桌骑士传奇
But “The Name Game.” Remember that?
名字游戏 还记得吗
“The Name Game”
名字游戏[儿歌♥游戏]
Brings us to Casey.
然后是凯西这名字
This whole next slew of names:
下面一串名字
Casey, Jordan, Dylan, Drew,
凯西 乔丹 迪兰 祖
Taylor, Tyler and probably mostly Skylar
托勒 泰勒 可能还有斯盖勒
are all names that could be girls’ names.
都可能是女孩的名字
Why don’t we just cut to the chase and call him Cindy?
我们何不省去麻烦直接叫他辛迪算了
Yeah, Atlanta. Trying to get out of this place.
我要离开亚特兰大这
Denver’s where it’s at, man.
丹佛才是我要去的地方
They got the whole underground
那里总有见不得光的
government conspiracy thing going on there.
政♥府♥阴谋丑闻
That so? I’m hearing a lot of chatter…
是吗 我在聊天室里看到
on the message boards the guys are talking about.
很多网友谈论的内容
Gotcha. I should grab this.
懂了 我得接下这个电♥话♥
Sorry. Hey, honey. Hey, sweety.
抱歉 嘿 甜心 嘿 乖乖
Did you get my message? I did.
收到我的短♥信♥没 收到了
I’m about halfway through it.
刚听了一半
I thought I’d take a little break.
我想先歇会儿
Haha, look, I didn’t want you to think
我不想让你觉得
I was arbitrarily dismissing any of those names.
我独断否定了那些名字
You considered them carefully.
你考虑得很周全
I just, it’s just such a big decision, you know?
只是 这是个重要的决定
I know. Clearly, you’re taking it very seriously.
我当然知道 你对此非常认真
But more importantly, what are you wearing?
先别说这个 你现在穿的什么
Armani Exchange.
Armani Exchange [阿玛尼旗下的副牌时装]
I’m talking to my… No, no, that’s just the driver, baby.
我是在和我…不 是司机在说话 宝贝
Okay, listen, I’m about to be dropped off. I should go.
好 我马上下车 得挂了
I love you, can’t wait to see you.
我爱你 非常想见你
I love you too. Safe flying.
我也爱你 一路顺风
Here you go. Perfect.
到了 很好
What in the eff?
搞什么
Goddamn it! We knocked it right off.
妈的 我们把门撞掉了
Hey, man! You just hit my car!
老兄 你刚撞到我的车了
You just knocked my door off, man. Oh, man. Sorry about that.
你刚把我的门撞掉了 抱歉
First things first, is everybody okay?
最重要的是 大家都没事吧
I’m in a Town Car! Don’t you know airport protocol?
我开的”林肯城市” 你不知道机场规定吗
Town Cars have the right of way always!
“林肯城市” 路上老大
That right there is some serious damage.
我的车损坏很严重
That ain’t shit!
你那算个毛
My brotherinlaw is gonna kill me. I’m through!
我姐夫会杀了我的 明白
You okay?
你没事吧
Sorry about my friend. I think he’s been drinking.
抱歉 我朋友就那样 估计他喝高了
You smell a little boozy too.
你也有点酒味
You guys drinking and driving together?
你俩一起喝酒开车?
Well, we haven’t been drinking.
其实 我们没喝
I mean, we had, we split a six-pack. Of 40s. But….
我们 我们只灌了半打 啤酒 不过…
You know what?
知道吗
My father always had a saying:
我父亲总说一句老话
When a day starts like this,
最开始倒霉
it’s all uphill from here.
以后会一直走运
That’s actually incorrect.
这话其实错了
No, my dad used to say it.
不会 我爹总这样说的
Uphill? No, it’s all downhill from here.
走运? 不对 是一直霉运
But everybody wants to be up.
但大家都想走好运
Nobody wants to be down. So it’s all uphill from here.
没人想走霉运 所以是走运
But it’s easier as you go down hell.
倒霉总是要容易
So your dad didn’t know what the fuck he was talking about.
你♥爸♥说的是就是破烂儿
Hey, Shelby? We good? We’re cool, man. I’ll take care of it.
舍尔比 没事吧 没事 我会搞定的
Okay. Go get them, Hollywood!
好 出发 好莱坞巨星
Excuse me. Sir?
对不起 先生
You mind picking these up?
介意把这些捡起来吗
I can’t. You’re not supposed to
不行
touch other people’s luggage at an airport.
机场不允许碰他人行李
Handle your own luggage.
自己搞定
Bag check!
检查包
This your bag, sir? Is there a problem?
这是你的包? 先生 有问题?
I’m gonna have to search it real quick, sir. OK. Yeah. Feel free.
我得检查下 很快的 好 随意
Mad magazine? That’s cute.
搞笑大王 有意思
That’s not mine.
这不是我的
This is your bag? That’s not…
这不是你的包? 那不是
Jackpot!
找到了
That’s definitely not mine. My bag got switched with this…
这绝对不是我的 我的包被一个
You packed your bag yourself, sir? But not that.
你自己装的包吗 但没装这个
I’ve never done drugs in my life.
我从没吸过毒
This is absolutely…This is crazy.
这绝对 这不可能
Maybe you a drug mule.
你可能是毒骡[偷运毒品的人]
Do I look like a drug mule?
我看着像毒骡吗
I don’t know, how do drug mules look?
不知道 那毒骡什么样
You’re the expert. What, like me?
你可是专家 你指像我这样?
Who said that? Your eyes.
谁说的 你的眼睛
My eyes said something? Did my mouth say anything?
我的眼睛说了? 我嘴巴说了吗
Your eyes just said it to me.
你眼神就这意思
I don’t think you look like a…
我觉得你不像
Do you mind not tossing it up so much?
别这样乱翻行吗
Funky motherfucker, ain’t you?
你是什么鸟人啊
You are so inappropriate, it’s crazy.
你太无礼了
I been called a lot of things, but “Inappropriate”?
什么称呼我都听过 “无礼”
That’s some fucked-up shit, yo.
真♥他♥妈♥的没劲儿
Oh, my goodness.
老天
Look at this, Sonny.
看看 索尼
Fancy.
真豪华
Died and gone to heaven.
天上人间啊
Sir, are you not aware that there’s a person here?
先生 这有人你没瞧见
Sorry.
抱歉
Well, hello!
是你呀
How you doing?
还好吗
What brings you up to first class?
你怎么来头等舱的
The seat that I procured
想方设法买♥♥的票
Oh, sorry. Excuse me.
抱歉 对不起
I was in uh, low class,
我本来是在普通舱的
and my seat belt didn’t work,
但我的 安全带坏了
and they bumped me up to the first class.
他们就把我提到头等舱了
It’s called economy.
这叫经济舱
Lucky day. Nice to see you.
幸运日 见到你很高兴
Sorry how we met, but, you know….
刚才那会儿对不起呀