不要抬头（2021）

装载核弹
loaded with nuclear explosives.
我们将会 把迪比亚斯基彗星撞离原有轨道…
We will blow Comet Dibiasky off her course…
但我们需要一位英雄
But we’re gonna need a hero.
我们需要一位飞行员 真枪实弹…
We’re gonna need a pilot, real guns and…
这项任务不该使用远程技术完成吗？
Shouldn’t this mission be accomplished using remote technology?
华盛顿永远需要英雄
Washington’s always gotta have a hero.
我邀请
I have asked
自♥由♥勋章获得者、心直口快的爱国者 本尼迪克特德拉斯克
Medal of Freedom recipient and outspoken patriot, Benedict Drask,
承担这项艰难而…
to undertake this difficult and…
不好意思 这不是那个
I’m sorry. Isn’t he the mercenary gentleman
在白宫草坪上吼小孩的雇佣兵吗？
that was screaming at all those children on the White House lawn?
对 他曾有幸执行总统发起的
Yeah. He was given the honor of leading
让儿童锻炼身体的活动
the presidential initiative in getting kids to exercise.
跳高一点 你们这些胖子…
Get a little air into it, you lard-ass…
你们就像一群胆小鬼
You look like a goddamn bunch of pussies.
-抱歉 -我觉得他是上一代人的思维
I’m sorry. He’s just of another generation.
我以前和他谈过恋爱
You know, I used to date him.
知道以前我在战斗中 遇到的最后一个懦夫怎么样了吗？
Know what happened to the last pussy I worked with in combat?
看过人体内部是什么样吗？
You ever see inside a man’s torso?
本尼迪克特德拉斯克前来报到
Benedict Drask reporting for duty.
-感谢你… -他很棒的
-Thank you for the… He’s gonna be fantastic.
他声音很好听
He’s got a great voice.
-我们要让他发表一份声明 -有人说这是一个…
-We’re gonna let him make a statement. Some are saying this is a…
他身材也很好
He’s got a great body too.
-真的 -是啊
He does. Yeah.
…自杀任务
…suicide mission.
我唯一的要求是
Well, all I ask is,
如果我死了
if I get snuffed,
你们都能因我的牺牲而活得更久
that you all earn the extra living my sacrifice gives you.
因我的牺牲让他们活得更久
The extra living my sacrifice gives them.
-对吧？ -这是我写的
-Right? I wrote that.
这不是《拯救大兵瑞恩》的台词吗？
Isn’t that from Saving Private Ryan?
-是的 -不 那里面的台词完全不一样
-Yes. No, that’s something totally different.
特别感谢我身后的科学家团队…
And special thanks should also go to this team of scientists behind me…
这次任务 我们需要所有人的帮助
We’re gonna need everybody’s help on this.
-所有人 -…关于这场迫在眉睫的威胁
Everybody.
所有人都应行动起来 把这条消息传播出去
All have to pitch in and push out this message.
…非裔美籍科学家
…African-American scientist.
迪比亚斯基小姐 她…
Miss Dibiasky, she…
彗星就是以她命名的 凯特迪比亚斯基
And we have Kate Dibiasky, who the comet is named after,
但不要责怪她
but don’t blame her.
…和不满的年轻人、精神疾病
…connects with the disaffected youth and the mentally ill.
-以及其他边缘群体产生共鸣 -谢谢
-And other marginal groups. Thank you.
-我们会尽己所能 -只要你们采取正确的行动
We’ll do whatever we can. As long as you do the right thing.
-我们会支持你们的 -好
We’re there for you.
特别是你 明迪博士 因为你的民调结果远高于你的同事们
Especially you, Dr. Mindy, because you poll so much higher
很疯狂
than your colleagues. It’s wild.
他会帮助我们 摧毁我们共同的敌人 迪比亚斯基
He will help us destroy our common enemy, Dibiasky.
真棒 我想我们的工作结束了
Wonderful. Well, I think we’re done.
是的 好 我们走吧
Yep, okay. Let’s go.
-我能说句话吗？ -凯特…
Can I say something?
我们等不及想听你的发言呢
We’ve been dying to hear what you gotta say.
我没有投票给你
I didn’t vote for you.
但这件事比我对你的怀疑重要很多
But this is obviously much bigger than my misgivings.
我会全力支持的
So I will be 100% behind this effort.
无论我觉得你有多无礼
No matter how offensive I may find you.
哇 太棒了
Hmm. Wow. That’s great.
是啊 真好
Yeah. That’s really nice.
是我让联邦调查局的人套住你的头
You know, I did have the FBI put that bag over your head.
他们一般不那么做 中情局才会这样 但我要求他们做了
They don’t do that. The CIA does, but I made them do it.
我其实猜到了 真的
You know, I had a feeling. I really did.
猜得很准 这就是我的行事风格
It’s a good feeling ’cause that is what I did.
-很有趣 很酷 -好的
-And it was very funny and cool. Okay.
愿耶稣基♥督♥保佑你们每个人
May Jesus Christ bless every single one of you,
特别是我党光荣的成员们
especially the honorable members of my own party.
我们会胜利的
We will prevail.
我们都会死！
-We’re all gonna die!
各位 这颗彗星让我压力好大
Guys, this comet is seriously stressing me out.
它要来了 人们应该挖防御沟渠
Well, it’s coming. People gotta dig in.
已经有人在线上市场找我买♥♥铁铲
I already got buyers for these shovels on e-market.
奥尔林总统在中期选举中 取得压倒性胜利
Clean sweep for President Orlean in these midterm elections.
（奥尔林支持率99. 1%）
-说到他的性感 -一张照片一千块
…how hot he is. Thousand bucks a pop.
（天文女巫 谴责凯特）
（彗星是场骗局吗？）
-我们突然就要完蛋了！ -“…履行我即将承担的职责”
…discharge the duties on which I am about to enter.
“向上帝起誓”
“So help you God. ”
-向上帝起誓 -祝贺
-So help me God. Congratulations.
（股票市场暴涨！）
办公室在严肃讨论颁出诺♥贝♥尔♥和♥平♥奖♥
We have talk of a Nobel Peace Prize in the offing.
他不性感啊
He’s not hot.
（股票市场下跌 一日破纪录！）
（末日将近 还会有超级碗吗？）
你好 胡麻
Hello, Sammy.
你真的是个博士吗？
Are you really a doctor?
算是吧 我是个天文学家
Well, sort of. I’m an astronomer.
天文学家是什么？
Oh. What is an astronomer?
明迪博士 很多人非常恐惧
Dr. Mindy, there is a lot of fear out there,
在美国 乃至全世界
uh, in America, around the world.
家长们不知道该怎么和孩子们说
Parents don’t know what to say to their kids.
你有什么话可以 帮助他们理解现在的处境吗？
What would you say to them to help them understand?
我知道现在很多人一定很害怕
Well, I’m sure many of us are frightened right now.
但我向大家保证 最优秀、最聪明的人正在着手解决
But I can assure you, our best and our brightest, they’re on the job.
我看过这个计划的科学论证 非常可靠
I’ve seen the science on this plan and it is sound.
我知道你的话一定能 安慰到我们所有观众 兰德尔博士
I know your words are a great comfort to all our viewers, Dr. Randall,
我们感谢你的勇气和贡献
and we thank you for your courage and your service.
我想说
I’d just like to say
每当我感到害怕或孤独 我…
that whenever I feel afraid or alone in this, I…
只要想到你 我就会好受些 谢谢
I think of you and I just… I feel better.
这是我的工作
So thank you. That’s my job.
-给我说我们都会死 -什么？
-Tell me we’re all gonna die. What?
-说吧 我们都会死 快 -我们都会死
-Tell me we’re all gonna die, do it. We’re all gonna die.
哦 天啊
Oh, boy.
所以这两个马♥克♥思♥主义者 挥舞着“科学”二字
So, these two Marxists wave around the word “science”
我们就应该照他们说的做？
and we’re all supposed to do whatever they say?
我们怎么知道是不是真的有彗星？
Yeah, how do we know there even is a comet?
众议员帕凯蒂先生 这份数据已经由
Mr. Pawketty, Congressman, this data has been proven
数百名世界知名科学家证实和审校过
and has been peer-reviewed by hundreds of world-renowned scientists.
我们应该相信你？ 彗星可是用你的名字命名的
And we’re supposed to trust you? The comet’s got your name.
我不明白这有什么关联
I don’t… I don’t see the relevancy.
那为什么不回答一下问题？
Why won’t you answer the question?
-回答问题 -问题是什么？
-Answer the question. What’s the question?
成熟一点 可以吗？
Grow up here, okay?
太荒唐了
This is ridiculous.
我刚意识到 我们一点都不了解彼此 是不是？
I’ve just realized, we don’t really know anything about each other. Do we?
是的
True.
每次我试着问关于你生活的问题
Well, every time I try to ask you about your life,
你好像只会告诉我你喜欢的餐厅
you seem to just tell me about your favorite restaurants.
我…你懂的…
Well, I… You know…
我不喜欢感情中
I just despise the, you know,
互相了解这个步骤 所以…
getting-to-know-you part of relationships, so…
好吧 我理解
Oh, okay. I understand.
好吧 那么我们速战速决
Okay, let’s just get it over and done with.
好的
Okay, uh…
对…
Right, so, uh…
我祖父发明了速冻技术
My grandfather invented the flash-freezing process.
所以我家境非常好
So I come from grotesque money,
但我远离家业 拿了三个硕士学位
but I got away from it by getting three masters degrees.
我离过两次婚
Uh, I’ve been divorced twice.
一次是和一个国务卿 另一次是和一个游钓运动员
Uh, one was a Secretary of State, and the other one was a sport fisherman.
我睡过两个前总统
Uh, I have slept with two former presidents.
我会说四种语言 有两幅莫奈的画
I speak four languages, and I own two Monets.
哇
Wow.