一周不死，全额退款（2018）

Have a good death.
你在干嘛？
What are you doing?
干！
Cock.
好像停了
I think it’s stopped.
你不谢谢我吗？
Aren’t you going to thank me?
为什么？
For what?
我刚救你一命
I just saved your life.
我感觉很复杂
I’m having mixed feelings about that.
天哪，可怜的布莱恩
Jesus.
Poor Brian.
你觉得他死了？
Do you think he’s dead?
他半张脸都不见了
Half his face was missing.
我也别想出书了
There goes my book deal.
你抽烟？
You smoke?
我都以为没人抽烟了
I didn’t think anyone smoked any more.
你知道这里是无烟餐厅
You know this is a non-smoking restaurant.
没人会在乎的
I don’t think they’ll care.
雷斯利？
Leslie?
哈啰
Hello, love.
怎么了？
What is it?
没什么
Oh, it’s nothing.
跟你结婚36年
After 36 years of marriage
我看得出有什么不对劲
I think I know something when I see it.
我工作时犯了个大错
Well I,
I made a terrible mistake at work.
雷斯，别担心
Oh Les, don’t worry.
人都会犯错
Everyone makes mistakes.
不该是我
Not me.
不该这样
Not like this.
哈维会杀了我
Harvey’s going to kill me.
我想他会谅解的
Oh, I’m sure he’ll understand.
又不是谁家死人了，对吧？
I mean, it’s not like anyone died, is it?
我去烧水
I’ll put the kettle on.
你绝对想不到
You’ll never guess who else is entered
谁也报名南郡靠垫大赛
her cushion into the Southern Counties.
谁？
Who?
摩芮布莉丝黛
Only Morag effing Bleasdale.
– 她是谁？ – 她是谁？
Who’s Morag Bleasdale?
Who’s Morag Bleasdale?
她是伦敦各郡最强的女红
She’s only the best needlecrafter in the home counties!
拿过所有大奖，我绝对赢不了她
She’s won everything!
There’s no way I’ll beat her.
你会赢的
Yes, you will.
我就知道不该绣靠垫
I knew I shouldn’t have done a cushion.
没绣我最轻松拿手的
I’m out of my comfort zone.
我想靠垫能让人更放松
I would have thought a cushion
我可不是开玩笑
would make it more comfortable.
This is not a joke, Leslie!
摩芮布莉丝黛
Morag Bleasdale!
更别提还有苏希门
Not to mention Sue Simmons, and Clive!
还有克莱，别忘了他
Don’t forget Clive.
去年两次他都打败我
He beat me twice last year and that was just local,
那是本地赛，这可是郡赛
去年两次他都打败我
He beat me twice last year and that was just local,
this is the Southern Counties.
那是本地赛，这可是郡赛
this is the Southern Counties.
我说了，输赢没关系
As I say, it’s not about winning.
我也说了，输赢有关系
And like I say, it is about winning.
花30小时绣个十字绣靠垫
I’m not cross-stitching a cushion
怎么能不拿名次！
for 30 hours to come unplaced!
你比摩芮布莉丝黛、苏希门
You are better than Morag Bleasdale,
和克莱都强
Sue Simmons and Clive.
他们很厉害的
They’re really good.
你更厉害
But you are better.
谢谢
Thank you.
你在干嘛？
What are you doing?
检查一下
I’m just checking something.
告诉我工作发生什么事
Now tell me what happened at work
我能帮你什么
and what I can do to help.
没关系，亲爱的
No, that’s all right, love.
我自己能解决
I’ll sort it myself.
失手一次算倒霉
To miss once was unlucky, to miss again, unthinkable.
再度失手简直荒谬
失手一次算倒霉
To miss once was unlucky, to miss again, unthinkable.
再度失手简直荒谬
自从签了合约
Since signing the contract,
他的问题没有更糟
his problems hadn’t seemed so bad,
除了一件事
except one.
那可能在任何时候发生
And that could happen at any moment.
嗨
Hey.
你怎么知道我住这？
How do you know where I live?
你的原稿上有写
It was on your manuscript.
Running into one another
Outside a cafe in Paris
我们可以开始弄你的书了
I thought we could start work on your book.
我以为…
But I thought…
反正我没别的事
I’ve got nothing else on.
我在放特别假
I’m on compassionate leave.
那个意外创伤
You know, for the trauma.
可以抽一支吗？
Can I have one?
你有吗？
And are you?
什么？
What?
心理受创？
Traumatized?
喔，当然
Oh yeah.
当然
Totally.
某人在我们眼前被枪杀
Yeah, a man was shot right in front of us.
那会…当然是…
That’s gonna, obviously it’s…
但往好处看，我可能会升职
But I probably will get promoted now, so,
他是个混♥蛋♥
well, he was a total dick!
就像我跟警方说的
And I mean, as I said to the police,
很多人希望他死
loads of people wanted him dead.
你在写新东西？
Are you working on something new?
别看
No, that’s…
我有个朋友搞新写作剧场聚会
Your know my friend does these new writing nights.
你应该来
You should come.
有音乐、啤酒
There’s music, beer,
和一些鬼玩意
other fuck ups.
你想要怎么做？
So how do you want this to work?
我对架构有些想法了
I’ve had some ideas on the structure.
我们应该每隔几天见一次
I think we should meet every couple of days…
听起来很棒
That sounds great, but I told you, I can’t.
但我跟你说过我不行
听起来很棒
That sounds great, but I told you, I can’t.
但我跟你说过我不行
你可以啊
Of course you can.
抱歉，我不行
No, I’m sorry.
你真的想一辈子关在这公♥寓♥？
Do you really want to be stuck in this flat
your whole life?
难怪你想自杀
Look at it.
– 你不懂 – 我懂
It’s no wonder you want to kill yourself.
You don’t get it.
I get that I connected with your book
我跟你的书能连结
I get that I connected with your book
我想其他人也可以
and I think other people will too.
我跟你的书能连结
我想其他人也可以
and I think other people will too.
这不就是你想找的？
Isn’t that what you’re looking for?
让你少一点…
Something to feel less, what did you say?
你怎么说的？茫然
让你少一点…
Something to feel less, what did you say?
你怎么说的？茫然
Adrift?
你怎么说的？茫然
Adrift?
可是我…
But I…
什么？
What?
我要告诉你一件事
I have something to tell you.
我雇了杀布莱恩的人
I employed the guy who killed Brian.
你干嘛雇人杀布莱恩？
Why would you employ someone to kill Brian?
不是，我雇他来杀我
No, I employed him to kill me.
但他失手，错杀了布莱恩
But he missed and killed Brian.
什么？