我的天 宝贝 你没事吧
Oh, my God. Honey, are you okay?
库尔特 -爸爸 你没事吧
Kurt! -Dad, Dad, are you all right?
我没事 她只是打偏
I’m okay. She just winged me.
对不起 教父
I’m sorry, El Padre! I’m sorry.
没关系 孩子 我中弹的次数比这还多
That’s okay, kid. I’ve been shot worse than this plenty of times.
把围巾做成止血带
Make your scarf into a tourniquet.
绑在他的肩膀上
Wrap it around his shoulder.
抬起他的腿
Lift his legs!
你会没事的 甜心 -我要流血了
You’ll be fine, sweetheart. -I’m gonna bleed out.
哇
Wow.
三连发
Two for two.
值得一试
Makes getting shot worth it.
捡回火鸡 布拉德
Get the birds, Brad.
老天 我都不认识这孩子
God! I don’t know who this child is.
你去捡那只
You get that one.
别说 我知道
What? I know, okay?
全怪我 我是世界上最差劲的妈妈
It’s on me. I’m the worst mom in the world.
我把枪放在我女儿手里 她差点杀了人
I put a gun in my daughter’s hand, and then she nearly killed somebody.
她一辈子都会有阴影
She’s gonna be scarred for life.
嗨
Hi!
我刚射杀了一只火鸡和一个人
I just shot a turkey and a man.
猜猜谁死了
Guess which one’s dead.
也许她只是太天真了
Okay, fine, maybe she’s a little too unscarred.
老天
Jeez.
你没事吧 -没事
You all right? -Yeah, good.
好吧 听着 医生说一切都好
All right. So, listen, the doctor said everything is gonna be all right.
你得留院观察几个小时
He just wants to keep you for a couple of hours
测量你的血压
to watch your blood pressure.
我很好 我的裤子呢
I’m fine. Where’s my pants?
我忘了 没什么能伤害你
Hey. I forgot. Nothing ever hurts you.
干嘛不把护士叫来
Why don’t we just round up all the nurses?
我们可以把他们都叫来
We can bring them in here.
你可以做俯卧撑给他们看
You could do some pushups for them,
也许可以在沙发上做推举
maybe bench press the couch a little bit,
证明你还是个硬汉
prove you’re still a tough guy.
还可以轻松打败你 小子
Still tough enough to lick you, Junior.
你在嘲笑我 -我没有嘲笑
Was that a scoff? -I didn’t scoff.
我刚才听到你在嘲笑我
Yeah, I heard you scoff just then.
我是嘲笑 那又怎样
All right, I scoffed. So what?
因为你认为你能打败我
Why, because you think you can lick me, right?
我没说打败你 但我肯定能打败你
I never said I could lick you, but I could whoop you for sure.
现在说了
Now we’re talking!
快点 三个回合最好
Come on. Best out of three falls, come on.
别说了 我才不和一个老头摔跤
Hey, cut it out, okay? I’m not gonna wrestle an old man
屁♥股♥还露出医院的病号♥服
whose ass is hanging out of his hospital gown.
希腊罗马式摔跤 最佳方式
Greco-Roman style. Best way. Come on.
霹雳上校 我才不会那样做
Hey, Great Santini, I’m not gonna do this, all right?
省省吧 休息一下 -好吧
Cut it out. Get some rest. -All right.
嘿
Hey!
一回合 软蛋
That’s one, candy-ass.
你要挨鞭子了 老头子
Now you’re gonna get whipped, old man.
快点 放马过来
Come on. Bring it on.
认输 -不 我可以玩整晚
Tap out! -Nah. I can keep going all night, kid.
你听到我心跳 你可以见识一下
You hear that heart rate? You can set your watch to it.
是啊 冰水只以一种速度流动
Yeah. ‘Cause ice water only flows at one speed, huh?
没错 现在去睡觉
That’s right, pal. Now go to sleep.
我进来是想说些好话 现在你可以忘掉了
You know I came in to say something nice, but now you can forget it.
什么好话
What nice thing?
算了吧
No. Forget it.
当那枪响的时候
You know, when that gun went off,
我以为你完蛋了
I thought you were a goner.
有些事我们永远不会说
There’s something that we never say that
我们中有人应该说否则为时已晚
one of us should say before it’s too late.
是吗 什么话
Yeah? Like… Like what?
我现在不想说 也许你想说点什么
No, I’m not gonna say it now, but maybe you want to say something.
我不知道你在说什么 -是吗
I don’t know what you’re talking about. -Oh, yeah?
看起来你有心里话要说
Seems like you might want to get something off your chest.
什么也想不起来了
No. Nothing comes to mind.
如果你想说什么
But if you want to say something,
我不会阻止你的
I’m not gonna stop you or anything.
不 我很好
No, I’m good.
你可能想卸下自己的负担
But you might wanna unburden yourself
在你撑爆那台机器之前
before you bust that frickin’ machine.
如果有我会说 但我没有
Yeah. Well, if I was gonna say something, and I’m not…
你想说什么
What are you gonna say?
如果我有 我可能会告诉你
But if I was, I might want to tell you that I…
你好
Hello?
是布拉德 别出声
Wait, it’s Brad! Don’t… Don’t say it! Don’t say it.
敲敲门
Knock, knock!
数到三就松开 一二三
Time out on three, okay? One, two, three.
布拉德
Hey, Brad.
怎么了
What’s going on?
我打扰了什么吗
Hey. Am I interrupting something?
什么 没有 -我们很好
What? No, nothing. -No, we’re fine.
你怎么这么奇怪
Why are you being so weird, Brad?
这里看起来有点尴尬
Just seems a little awkward in here.
天哪 闻起来像斗牛
Oh, gosh. It smells like a bullfight.
好吧 两位
So, look, guys,
我不是来告诉你们我说过的
I’m not here to tell you I told you so,
尽管我已经说过
even though I did.
我一直在想
I’ve just been thinking that
我们最近关系很紧张 我想
we’ve had a lot of tensions as of late, and I thought
也许我们可以利用爸爸之夜
maybe we could use a Dads’ Night Out. Right?
那我们要去哪儿
Yeah. So what are we thinking, Brad?
脱衣舞俱乐部
Strip club?
甚至更好
Even better.
你背上有一只可爱的小猴子
Look, it’s a cute tiny monkey on your back.
把抽屉里的钱和棒棒糖都给我们
Give us all the money in the drawers and all the lollipops.
我跟不上了
Guys, I can’t keep up.
我要去趟厕所
I’m gonna hit the head.
我再去拿点饮料 -好
I’ll get us a couple more drinks. -Sure.
我没看错吧 你们玩得很开心
Hey, am I crazy or are you guys having a good time?
我不知道 我想有点
I don’t know. I think we kind of are.
太棒了 达斯蒂 -谢谢
That’s wonderful, Dusty! -Thanks, Don.
我们会好好照顾你们
I told you we’d rub off on you two.
在这个房♥间里
In this room right now,
有一个人 尽管年事已高
there’s a man who, despite his advancing years,
似乎是个即兴忍♥者
is apparently an improv ninja.
布拉德 不会吧
Brad, you didn’t.
是的
I did. I so did!
唐·惠特克 女士们先生们
Don Whitaker, ladies and gentlemen!
好吧
All right. All right.
你是最棒的
You are the greatest.
我们为唐鼓掌
Don! Let’s hear it for Don!
我们来玩个“双手叉腰”
We’re gonna play a little “Arms Akimbo.”
你知道怎么玩吗
Do you know that one?
当然知道 -太棒了
Of course I do! -Awesome.
他们会喜欢的
They’re gonna love this.
谁帮我弄一下搭扣 -好
Can somebody do my Velcro? -Yes.
他的手臂是小女孩的
He’s got tiny little girl arms!
我们要拍一个场景 需要一些建议
Okay. We’re gonna do a scene, and we need some suggestions.
可以推荐一种动物
Can you suggest an animal?
浣熊 -熊猫
Raccoon! -A panda!
浣熊 好的
Raccoon, good! All right.
先生 你的职业是什么
And, sir, what is your profession?
我是皮肤科医生
I’m a dermatologist.
最后 我们需要一种人际关系
And finally we need a human relationship.
父亲和儿子
Oh! Father and son!
一种健康的父子关系
A healthy father and son relationship.
或者离婚关系
Or how about a divorce?