恰恰丝滑（2022）

她在家
She’s at home.
她没事吧？
Is she okay?
没事 她只是今晚不想来参加派对
Yeah, she just didn’t feel like coming to a party tonight.
你为什么说话这么含糊？
Why are you so fucking vague, man?
什么？ -她是病了 还是怎么了？
What? -Is she, like, sick or what?
听着 辛德勒先生在往这边看 他好像想让你回去工作
Look, Mr. Schindler’s looking over here like he wants you to get back to your job.
我让你回去工作 我去和萝拉坐一起
I’m going to let you do that. I’m gonna go sit with Lola.
你能帮我个忙吗？ 你能不能给我来一杯纯水？
Could you do me a solid? Could you pour me, like, a straight water?
我说的是水是指伏特加
And by water I mean vodka.
继父格雷格
Stepdad Greg.
嘿 我和你妈妈、你弟弟刚到
Hey. I just showed up with your mom and brother.
我想你不会独自来参加
Well, I didn’t think you were showing up alone
本杰明辛德勒的成人礼派对
to Benjamin Schindler’s bar mitzvah party.
我听说你要搭我们的车回家 因为你是搭优步来的？
I hear we’re driving you home because you Ubered. Is that right?
对 是这样
That’s right. Yes.
虽然我觉得花在优步上的钱是值得的
Although I feel like all that Uber money might be worth it
不用闻你车里的鱼味
to not smell that fish in your car.
什么鱼？ -我不知道
What fish? -I have no idea.
我猜你的车里放过很多鱼
I assumed you had many fish in your car.
你在我的车里放鱼了吗？ -没有 你的车就是臭
Did you put fish in my car? -No, man, your car just reeks.
够了 安德鲁
All right, Andrew.
今晚一切顺利 确保让大家开心
Have a nice night making certain people feel happy.
今晚祝你痛恨你的生活
Have a nice night hating your life.
孩子 你喝醉了吗？
Are you drunk right now, son?
是的 先生…
I am. Yes. Sir, yes, sir.
嘿…
Hey, hey, hey.
辛德勒先生早就想让你开始了 你去哪了？
Mr. Schindler wanted you to start a while ago. Where have you been?
吸毒 告诉他他儿子的派对将会很精彩
Doping. Tell him his kid’s party’s gonna be lit.
是 我会告诉他 他儿子的派对发起人吸了毒
Yeah, I’m going to tell him his kid’s party starter was doping.
怎么搞的？你很臭
What? You stink.
不会 你才臭
Nah, you stink.
你很臭 你现在有工作要做
You stink. You have a job to do right now.
辛德勒先生穿着小丑服装
Well, Mr. Schindler’s wearing a clown costume, so.
你现在赶快开始 我告诉他你去大便了 好吗？
You start now and I’ll tell him you were just pooping. Okay?
好吧 很好 你随便说什么都行 妈妈
Okay, great. Tell him whatever you want, Mom.
你的工作
Job.
好 知道了
Okay, got it.
老天啊
Jesus Christ.
嘿 -怎么了？
Hey. -What?
关于昨晚我很抱歉 我需要建议 我很紧张
I’m really sorry about last night. I need advice. I’m really nervous.
每个人都会紧张 你没问题 我得走了
Everybody’s nervous. You got it. I got to go.
大家好啊 你们想看马戏团吗？
Hello, everybody. Are you guys ready for a circus?
你们想听音乐吗？好的
You ready for some music? All right.
我知道要让你们当中 有些人走进舞池是很难的
I know how hard it is for some of you to get on the dance floor,
但是我们今天晚上开始的方式
but the way we’re going to start tonight
是每个人都来跳恰恰滑步
is everybody is gonna do the Cha Cha Slide.
每一个人 无一例外
Every single person. No exceptions.
我要等到每个人都到舞池里来
I’m literally not going to start the song
才开始播放歌♥曲
until every single person is on the dance floor.
嘿 你想和我走到饮水机去吗？
Hey. Do you want to walk with me to the water fountain
在其他人跳恰恰滑步的时候
while everybody’s dancing to the Cha Cha Slide?
好
Yeah.
我们只是去喝水 还是应该在这里聊聊天？
Are we just getting water, or should we hang out back here?
我们可以在这里聊聊天
We can hang out back here.
你的足球比赛怎么样？
How was your soccer game?
很好 我们赢了
Good. We won.
祝贺你
Congratulations.
我为你进了一个球
I scored a goal for you.
那真好
That’s nice.
那条项链真漂亮 -那是谁的魔方？
That’s a really nice necklace. -Whose cube is that?
你想…
Do you want to…
接吻吗？
Kiss?
那是我刚收到的礼物
I just got it as a gift.
快点 给我 -不
Come on. Give it. -No.
你在看什么？
What are you looking at?
嘿
Hey.
我马上回来 -好吧
I’ll be right back. -All right.
向左 现在回来 所有人
To the left Take it back now, y’all
这次跳一下 右脚 我们来跺脚
One hop this time Right foot, let’s stomp
向左 我们来跺脚 恰恰非常顺滑
Left foot, let’s stomp Cha cha real smooth
向左 现在回来 所有人 该尽情跳舞了…
Cha cha now, y’all Now it’s time to get funky…
把我的魔方还给我 给我 -你个子够高
Give my cube back. Give it. -You’re tall enough.
把她的东西还给她 -滚开
Give her her stuff back. -Get off.
该死 罗德里戈
Oh, shit, Rodrigo.
混♥蛋♥
Fuck head.
孩子们…
Guys, guys, guys.
你没事吧？ -嘿
Are you okay? -Hey!
别急…
Relax, relax. Relax.
嘿 -该死
Hey! -Goddamn it.
嘿 别推我妈
Hey, don’t push my mom.
喂 怎么回事？
Yo, what the hell?
嘿
Hey.
厉害
Damn.
安德鲁 每一份专业工作都有界限
Andrew, there are boundaries that come with a professional gig.
每一种职业都有那些界限
Every profession has those boundaries.
好吧 可是你把那个家伙打昏了 继父格雷格
Okay, but the way you put that man to sleep, stepdad Greg.
安德鲁 这不好笑
Andrew, this isn’t funny.
妈妈 我很抱歉你挨了打
Mom, I’m sorry that you got slugged,
可罗德里戈和大卫打的那些小孩是混♥蛋♥
but those kids that Rodrigo and David were fighting are pricks.
他们年级的每个小孩今晚都能睡好了
Every kid in their grade is going to sleep very well tonight,
知道那些家伙被揍了 还有那个混♥蛋♥爸爸
knowing they got their asses kicked. Along with that prick dad.
现在他们不敢欺负人了 -注意语言
Now they won’t fuck with people. -The language.
对 妈妈和格雷格 打架是值得的
Yeah. It was worth it, Mom and Greg.
我等着揍他们已经等了三年了
Yeah, I’ve been waiting to kick their asses for three years now.
难以置信
Unbelievable.
格雷格 那是我见过的 最厉害的右勾拳 朋友
And, Greg, that was the meanest right hook I’ve ever seen, my boy.
对 格雷格 我以前不知道你身手这么敏捷
Yeah, Greg. I did not know you could move like that.
你是谁 杰克保罗吗？
What are you, Jake Paul?
我就知道你喜欢那个笑话 小子 他直接昏倒了
I knew you would like that one, dog. He literally fell asleep.
没人胆敢打你妈妈
Well, no one hits your mother.
妈妈 它不在桌子上
Mom, it’s not on the table.
你在我的包里找了吗？ -找了 不在包里
Did you look in my bag? -Yes, it’s not there.
我不知道 也许在我床头柜上
I don’t know. Maybe it’s on my bedside table.
好吧
Okay.
听着 我真的不希望你现在开车
Look, I really don’t want you to drive right now.
格雷格 我只喝了一杯 -你要去哪？
Greg, I had one drink. -Where are you going?
我去一个朋友家 因为她生病了
I’m going to my friend’s house because she’s sick
我想去看看她 -你干嘛这么着急？
and I want to go check on her. -Why are you in such a hurry?
我不着急 你得用冰敷 看起来很严重
I’m not in a hurry. You need to put ice on that. It looks horrible.
大卫 你能跟我上楼吗？
David, can you come upstairs with me?
还有 你们得冰敷你们的手
And, you guys, ice your fists.
因为你们打人了
‘Cause of your punches.
是 先生 -是 先生
Yes, sir. -Yes, sir.
大卫 上来
David, come up here.
我很抱歉 我过去24小时过得很糟糕
I’m really sorry. I was having a bad 24 hours.
没关系 -有关系 可是我很抱歉
It’s okay. -It’s not okay, but I’m really sorry.
你今晚第一次接吻了吗？ -没有
Did you have your first kiss tonight? -No.
你没有？那很好
You didn’t? That’s good.
那其实非常非常好 因为我意识到
That’s actually really, really good because I realized something.
我教你的根本没用
My lessons sucked.
它们极具误导性
They were, like, super misleading.
我一直告诉你这和玛格丽特有关
I kept telling you that it was all about Margaret
还有 让你全心全意地关注她
and about, like, giving her all your attention,
但我忘记说你也必须关注你自己
but I forgot to say that you have to pay attention to yourself too.
这不容易 就像我们说过的 其实很难
It’s not easy, like we were saying. It’s actually really hard.
因为你也必须争取你想要的
Because you’ve got to go for what you want, too.
接吻是让两个人愉快的事
Kissing is for two people to enjoy.
我得走了
I got to go.
今晚过得真的太棒了
Really awesome shit tonight.
做你的哥哥我深感自豪
I’m so proud to be your big brother.