陵园路口（2010）

我不想在吃饭的时候看到丛林小妞
I do not want jungle tits at the table.
看啊 看英国有多小 去法国只要五个小时
Look. Look how tiny England is. France is only five hours away.
现在出发十二点半就能到巴黎
We could leave and by half past 12 we’d be in Paris.
-为什么 -去巴黎干什么
– Why? – Why go to Paris?
雷丁还有很多地方你没去过
There’s parts of Reading you haven’t seen.
-法国食物很难吃 -那是世界上公认最好的
– Food’s awful in France. – Supposed to be the best in the world.
-别开玩笑了 -马肉 蜗牛 青蛙腿
– You’re joking. – Horses, snails, frogs’ legs.
-他们什么都吃 -唯一不往嘴里放的是
– They’d eat anything. – Only thing they won’t put…
-牙刷 -臭死了
– in their mouth is a bloody toothbrush. – Stink.
法国猪们以口臭闻名
Yeah, famous for it, breathy French pigs.
非洲看起来很漂亮
Well, Africa looks beautiful.
非洲 你知道那里遍地黑人吧
Africa? You know it’s full of blacks.
对啊 那是黑人生活的地方
Yeah. That’s where black people live.
话虽如此
You say that,
但你不需要去非洲看黑人
but I tell you what, you won’t have to go there soon to see one
因为他们全在涌向这里
because they’re all coming here, boy.
懒惰 还和我们抢就业机会
Lazy, nicking our bleeding jobs.
那他们到底是懒惰还是在和我们抢工作
Are they lazy or are they nicking our jobs?
都是
Yeah.
付莱迪 你说话就像嬉皮士
You sound like a hippie, Freddie.
这可一点都不像学术讨论
Nothing like an intellectual debate.
你就像BBC台上那些娘们
Sound like one of them BBC queers.
你不会是同性恋吧
You’re not a crafty butcher, are you?
-同性恋 -喜欢从后面享受快♥感♥
– Crafty butcher? – Likes meat delivered round the back.
-他才不是 你说呢 -我不是同性恋
– He’s not. Are you? – No, shut up.
最好不是 至少在这家里别这样
Better not be. Better not be, not in this house.
难道你从来没有想过
Is it never occurred to any of you
生活不仅仅是工作
there might be more to life than working
吃饭还有看电视吗
eating and watching the telly?
阿♥拉♥伯有句古老的谚语
There’s an ancient Arab proverb that says:
“将自己的心与梦想抛向身前 冲上前去抓住它”
“Throw your heart out in front of you and run ahead to catch it. ”
没错 但那是他们发现石油之前
Yeah. That was before they got all the oil.
现在根本没有四下奔波的阿♥拉♥伯人
There’s no Arabs running around today. I’ll tell you that.
他们根本不追逐任何东西
They don’t chase anything.
他们有钱 让管家打理一切
They’re getting their butlers to do it with the money they got.
他们有钱得不得了 那些阿♥拉♥伯人 他们住在帐篷里
They’re so rich, the Arabs, they just live in tents, right…
住在永远装满食物的帐篷里
…full of food all the time.
因为有钱 他们吃食物只是为了享受
They eat food just for the sake of it because they’ve got so much money.
沃玲女士 最近好吗
Hello, Mrs. Waring. Are you all right?
我只是想说 感谢像你们一样的客户
I just wanted to say, thanks to customers such as yourself…
我终于通过了试用期
I’ve finally passed my probation
并拥有了自己的名片
and I’ve got my own business cards now.
-真不错 -所以 要是你需要任何帮助
– Well done. – So, if you need anything…
事实上 我的确需要你帮忙
Actually, I do need something.
真抱歉 我知道你非常忙
I’m really sorry to bother you. I’m sure you’re very busy,
但我要申请索赔
but I need to make a claim.
-关于什么 -我丈夫
– Oh, what’s that for? – My husband.
他最近怎样 又把车子撞凹了吗
Yeah? What’s he been up to? Dent the car again?
他去世了
He died.
我非常抱歉
I’m so sorry.
他在调整天线的时候滑倒了
He was moving the aerial, then he slipped…
然后摔在那里
…and he landed just there.
他把脖子摔断了 马上就断气了
He was dead instantly. He broke his neck.
真希望我们当初选择去度假
Wish we’d done that holiday now.
我们什么时候走
When are we leaving?
无聊吗
Bored?
你在干什么 你怎么上来的
What are you doing? How did you get up here?
我顺着藤子爬上来的
Well, I climbed up a vine.
爬藤 你是人猿泰山啊
Climbed up a vine? What are you, Tarzan?
-我是来说再见的 -你电♥话♥坏了吗
– I came to say goodbye. – Your phone not working?
我要离开了
I’m leaving. You inspired me.
你和你那阿♥拉♥伯谚语启发了我
You and your ancient Arab proverbs.
你什么意思
What do you mean?
明天一大早 九点钟 我们就走了
First thing tomorrow, 9 a.m., we’re gone.
真让人激动
That’s exciting.
出来玩吧 今晚是我们的离别晚会
Come out, it’s our last night, it’s our leaving party.
我们去莫扎迪斯夜♥总♥会♥
We’re going to the Majestic.
那是世界上最好的夜♥总♥会♥ 它
It’s the best club in the world. It’s, like, so…
棒极了
Majestic?
你永远不会相信我见到了谁 丹尼克·雷瑟
You’ll never guess who I saw. Danny Cresser.
-不会吧 -没错 就在宠物店外
– No way. – Yeah, outside the pet shop.
诡异极了
It was so weird.
我当时正要进去 他刚好出门
I was, like, just going in, and he was coming out.
你还记得当时在学校他可安静了
And you remember he used to be so quiet in school?
现在却侃侃而谈
He was, like, talking and…
-布鲁斯 -亲爱的
– Hi, Bruce. – Hi, darling.
来吧 司诺克 跟我们一块
Come on Snork. Come with us.
不行 我明天无论如何不能走
No, there’s no way I can go tomorrow.
-为什么 -我要帮我爸的忙
– Why not? – I’ve gotta help my Dad.
-司诺克 我们在讨论你剩下的人生 -不去
– Snork, it’s the rest of your life we’re talking about. – No.
听着 假如说世界上还有其他聚会
Look, what if the world’s having another party
而我们却因为被困在这里不能脱身
…and we’re missing it cuz we’re stuck here?
我可不想工作四十年挣不到几个钱
Look, I don’t wanna work for 40 years for no money
在睡梦中离开这个世界
and die in sleep…
然后在葬礼上 他们唯一能说的就是
…and at the funeral, all they say is:
他支持雷丁俱乐部 腌制洋葱是他的最爱
“He supported Reading Football Club and he liked pickled onions. ”
-你最近一次看雷丁比赛是啥时候 -什么
– When’s the last time you went to a Reading game? – What?
谁会在你的葬礼上说那些鬼话
Who’s gonna say that at the funeral?
至少我不会 我会说你去看了单数局
I wouldn’t say that. I’d say you went to the odd game.
我不是这个意思
That’s not the point.
你老的时候难道不想有故事讲吗
Don’t you want stories to tell when you’re an old man?
我有故事了
Oh, I’ve got stories.
没错 他和面包不得不说的故事
Yeah, he’s got one about some bread.
来吧 司诺克 你得和我们一起走
Come on, Snork. You’ve got to come.
这对大家有好处 再说你是不可或缺的一员
It’s one for all and all for one.
为什么我们明天就要走
Why we gotta go tomorrow?
因为不那样我们会打退堂鼓的
Cus otherwise we’ll talk ourselves out of it.
你不会错过任何东西
You won’t miss anything.
再说了 司诺克 想想美女们
Plus, Snork, think of the birds.
你在这里每次一开口就碰壁 对吧
I mean, you ruin it every time you open your mouth, don’t you?
但国外的美女根本不知道你在说什么
But foreign birds aren’t gonna understand a word you say.
全靠你长相吃饭
You can rely on your looks.
好吧
Well…
我只去不需要接种疫苗的地方
I’m not going anywhere where we need injections.
-太棒了 -太棒了 司诺克
– Yeah! – Yeah, Snork. Yeah.
不行不行 再来再来 别动
No, no. Again, again, again. Hold on.
不不 再来一张
No, again, again, again.
你怎么想 我们也去跳舞吧
What do you reckon? Should we do it?
我不知道
I don’t know.
兄弟
Oi, mate.
你怎么跑去和猴子跳舞
What are you dancing with a monkey for?
兄弟 被你说中了
Yeah, good one, mate.
朱莉 我们走 快
Let’s go. Julie, come on.
这可不是我平时呆的房♥间
Not my usual suite.
你有牙刷可以借给我吗
You got a toothbrush I can borrow?
对了 你是没有牙刷的
Oh, no, you don’t own a toothbrush, do you?
今晚很有意思 谢谢你了
Thanks for an interesting night.
我们应该多出来玩玩的 像今天一样
We should have done this more often.
我不应该和一个陌生人跳舞
I shouldn’t be in dance halls with a strange man.
那应该把司诺克留在车里
We could’ve left Snork in the car.
那祝你旅途愉快 你什么时候回来
So have a good trip. When are you coming back?
不知道
Don’t know.
-那再见了 -再见
– Bye, then. – Bye.
-我们应该把照片洗出来 -当然
– We should develop those pictures. – Definitely.
-要不 -我就看不到了
– Otherwise – I won’t get to see them.
这步要非常小心
We need this to be perfect.
-弄皱了怎么办 -那你就麻烦大了
– What happens if you crease it? – You get into big trouble.
好了 快把照片放进来 这是定影液
Okay, quick, put it in here. This is called the stop bath.
为什么要这么小声说话
Why are we whispering?
-为了防止被你老公抓到吗 -不是
– Is it so we don’t get caught in here? – No.