鲶鱼（2010）

不定的 我的第一反应是多少就是多少
It just varied. Whatever came off the top of my head.
这也是我的问题
And it was part of my problem,
因为我从不写下来
too, ’cause I never wrote that down.
他会问我收了多少钱
So he’s like, “How much did you charge for that?”
我会说我不记得了
I’ll be like, “I don’t remember.”
他就以为我突然间重度失忆了
So, he thinks I’m just terribly forgetful all of a sudden.
我俩间的交流真不错
I mean, it was an amazing correspondence.
-是啊 -你知道吗
– Yeah. – You know?
-这是段真实的友情 -是的
– It was a real, you know, friendship… – Yeah.
是我自己正在找寻的友情
…that I was also looking for, myself.
我不想失去这段友谊
And I didn’t want to lose the friendship.
有些时候觉得自己做的事超出了限度
And there was times where I felt like I was really overstepping,
就尽量退一步
and I’d try to pull it back by being like,
我跟自己说 我不想失去这份友谊
“I don’t want to lose the friendship. ”
对
Right.
无论如何 我不想失去它 但我又想
No matter what. I didn’t want to lose that, but then I was like,
这并不是段真实的友谊 假如我在说谎
“If I’m lying, it’s not really a friendship anyway.”
只会越来越艰难
So, it just got harder.
我觉得最终你会恨我
And I really thought you’d just end up hating me.
你能够让我看到我没法接触的东西
You were able to show me things that I don’t have access to.
我们没法接触到那样的舞蹈
We don’t have access to dance like that.
所以 真的很棒
So, it’s really been nice.
在我年轻的时候
Dancing was an important part of my life
跳舞是我生活重要组成部分
when I was younger,
我一直想当一位职业舞者
and I always wanted to be a professional dancer.
我只是放弃了
I just threw it away, really.
错过了机会
Threw it away to have a good time.
所以我的一些性格特质
So, a lot of the personalities
是源于各种不同的我
that came out were just fragments of myself.
过去的我 梦想的我和不可能的我
Fragments of things I used to be. Wanted to be, never could be.
关于这点 我想说的就是这些
That’s all I ever want to say about that.
我一看到这两孩子
You know, when I met the boys,
就料到自己要做出牺牲
I knew I was making a sacrifice with my life,
对那些我即将放弃的东西
but I didn’t count the cost of things
我没有去权衡得失
that I was going to be giving up.
为了我的余生 我选择放弃
I’m sort of resigning for the rest of my life.
今年 我辞去了工作
And this year, when I resigned my career,
我不知道 我放弃了很多自己的东西
I don’t know, it’s like I gave up a lot of myself.
大部分时间我都不知道自己是谁
And I don’t know most days who I am.
她表达了稍许
She did express some
或许是被压抑的失望情感
maybe suppressed disappointment, in a small way,
她没法追寻在她心中生根发芽的梦想
at not being able to pursue some of the
对此她感到失望
dreams that she may have had growing up.
你有和她谈过这点吗
Did you ever talk about that with her?
她有向你表达过这种情感吗
Did she ever express that to you?
恩 她跟我说过
Yeah, she says things like that to me.
然后我提醒她 一而再地
Yes, and then I remind her, again,
你想要的是什么 你不可能得到所有
“What is it you want in life? Because you can’t have it all.”
她回来后说 她想要这个家庭
And then she comes back, “I want to be with this family.
我想要我的房♥子 我想要安定
“I want my house, I want security,
这就是我想要的
and that’s what I want.”
那么 你就得为此而努力
Then, that’s what you shoot for.
因为如果你想要其他的
Because if there’s something else you want,
那你就得去追寻
then you need to go looking for that.
我想让安琪拉
I mean, I wanted to ask Angela to
模仿梅根的语气跟我说会儿话
speak to me as Megan for a little while.
天 我不知道自己行不行
Oh, gosh. I don’t know if I can.
我觉得你行
I think you can.
我需要手♥机♥做道具
拿去 你用这个吧
Here, you can use this.
我觉得很傻
像梅根那样跟你说话
我不知道自己能否模仿得像
这很酷
That’s cool.
是吗
我要告诉你我有多想见你吗
我确实很想见你
让你以这种方式听我说话
我几乎可以看到从你眼神流露出的痛苦
我不喜欢这样
不看我说话的时候你的眼睛更漂亮
漂亮的令人难以置信
好困难
你在想什么呢
我不知道
I don’t know.
准备回家了
-是吗 -是的
旅途漫漫啊
It’s been a long trip.
痛苦吗
Painful?
我为你感到难过
为我的所作所为感到难过
我会没事的
这是我有生以来最难画的一幅画
This has been the hardest drawing I’ve ever done in my life,
基于很多原因
for so many reasons.
那一定要画好
Well, it better be good.
一定
Better be.
就这样了
That’s that.
重新开始
Start over.
这…你想要我…
It’s… What do you want me…
告诉我你觉得里面是什么
-我知道里面是什么 -是什么
– know what’s inside. – What’s inside?
里面是什么 为什么不打开看看呢
What’s inside? Why don’t we just open it and see?
人们过去把鳕鱼一路从阿♥拉♥斯加运到中国
They used to tank cod from Alaska all the way to China.
他们把鳕鱼养在船上的大桶里
They’d keep them in vats in the ship.
当鳕鱼送达中国的时候
By the time the codfish reached China,
肉都结块了而且失去了鲜味
the flesh was mush and tasteless.
因此送鱼人想出了一个办法
So this guy came up with the
把鳕鱼放到大桶里
idea that if you put these cods in these big vats,
同时再加几条鲶鱼
put some catfish in with them,
鲶鱼让鳕鱼保持灵活敏捷
and the catfish will keep the cod agile.
生活中有些人就扮演着鲶鱼的角色
And there are those people who are catfish in life,
他们使你保持警觉
and they keep you on your toes.
使你猜个不停
They keep you guessing,
使你一直思考下去
they keep you thinking,
使你生龙活虎
they keep you fresh.
这很不错
It’s really good.
感谢上帝赋予我们”鲶鱼”
And I thank God for the catfish,
因为如果没有他们的时刻提醒
because we’d be droll,
我们的生活将会变得可笑单调而令人生厌
boring and dull if we didn’t have somebody nipping at our fin.
安琪拉并没有患癌症
曙光农场里并没有梅根
安琪拉并不认识照片中的女孩
你能过来和我在窗边聊聊吗
不太想
Don’t really feel like it.
历史9个月的通信
安琪拉和尼夫互发了大约1500条短♥信♥
照片中的女孩叫埃米·冈萨雷斯
她是职业模特兼摄影师
她和丈夫 两个孩子
住在温哥华 华盛顿州
2008年10月11日
罗纳德·文森的双胞胎儿子之一过世了
安琪拉停用了其他15个相册
把Facebook的头像照改成了自己的照片
尼夫仍然活跃于Facebook
目前他有732位好友
包括安琪拉