谢谢
Thanks.
九月二十四日,我给了演员们重写稿,他们都很高兴
September 24. I gave the cast the rewrites. Everyone seemed pleased.
这太出色了!哦! – 确实
These are brilliant! Oh! – They are.
现在西尔维娅不再被动了
Now Sylvia’s not so passive.
她用她的诡计来诱骗中尉,就是这引起了她的内疚!
She uses her wiles to trap the Lieutenant, and that’s what causes her guilt!
整件事都有动机了,它一直发展着,太好了
The whole thing is motivated. It drives on. Wonderful.
你意思是我又要背过这些新台词? – 它们太棒了!
You mean I gotta memorize all new lines? – They’re wonderful!
你怎么想到这些点子的? – 它们其实不算是我的…
How did you come up with such divine changes? – They’re not really mine…
不是吗?还能是谁的,上帝的?
Oh, no? Whose are they, God’s?
呃,只能说某种意义上它们是我的… – 你太谦逊了
Well, they are mine in the sense that they’re mine… – Your modesty becomes you.
但还是承认了吧,你真的是天才
But let’s face it; you are a major talent.
一位在戏剧界冉冉升起的巨匠
A major new voice in the theater.
天才这个词在这行当里经常被滥用…
The word genius gets thrown around so frequently in this business…
但亲爱的,如果你天赋异禀… – 恭喜
but, darling, if the shoe fits… – Congratulations.
这一天总会来的 – 现在,如果我们能为《第三幕》做点什么…
It finally has balls. – Now, if we can do something about Act Ill…
我们现在手上终于有了资本
we got a big, fat hit on our hands.
为作家欢呼吧! – 好极了
Three cheers for the writer! Hip-hip… – Hooray!
我花了整晚改写第三幕
I stayed up all night working on the third act.
我承认写起来很困难…
I admit it came rather hard…
所以在交稿子之前,我把它们先给了奇契
and before I handed in the pages, I sent them over to Cheech to read.
他读过后让我到他办公室
He suggested I come down to his office.
你没抓住重点 – 我没有?
You missed the idea. – I did?
嗯,你没有,另外,没人会那样说话
Yeah, you did. Plus, nobody talks like that.
你有这毛病,你的台词不像人话 – 我可是有诗人证的人
You got that problem. You don’t write like people talk. – I take poetic license.
诗人证,狗屁,只有演员对话生动时观众才会相信剧情
Poetic license, bullshit. People believe what they see when the actors sound real.
过来,我教你 – 你要干嘛?
Come here. Let me show you. – What are you doing?
我像在干嘛? – 你要写?
What does it look like I’m doin’? – You’re gonna write it?
你当我傻瓜吗?我烧学校前学过写作
What am l? A fuckin’ idiot? They taught me how to write in school before I burned it down.
你把你学校烧了? – 嗯,那天是林肯生日,学校里没人
You burned down your school? – Yeah, it was Lincoln’s birthday. There was nobody there.
你如果真的写… – 听着,我知道人们怎么说话,懂吗?
If you actually write… – Look, I know how people talk, all right?
去玩上一把,让我来干这个
Go shoot a rack, and let me do this.
但如果你真要写,那我就不…
But if you actually write it, then I’m not…
别担心,我不告诉别人 – 你不会?
Don’t worry about it. I ain’t gonna tell anybody. – No?
不会,你是老大,我知道排戏是怎么回事
No. I saw you playin’ the big shot. I know what it’s all about.
再说了,我没告密的习惯
Where I come from, nobody squeals.
去玩一把
Go shoot a rack.
别老瞪着我
Stop starin’ at me.
这对话!比尤金·奥尼尔还好!
What dialogue! This is better than O’Neill!
马克斯威尔·安德森永远都比不上你!
Max Anderson will never touch you!
那么说你喜欢它
So you liked it.
它充满了激♥情♥!它充满了生命!
It’s so full of passion! It’s so full of life!
我希望它把整个故事升华了 – 这跟第一稿相比有多大的进步!
I hoped it would lift the story. – What a difference between this and your first draft.
那时候你还没找到自我,创意已经有了,但是还未成形
You hadn’t found yourself yet. The idea was there, but it hadn’t crystallized.
你需要它们来召唤你,现在它们来了
You needed to hear it on its feet, and now this.
这再也不是不温不火,卖♥♥弄辞藻的剧本了
It’s no longer tepid and cerebral.
它充满生命!充满激♥情♥!
It’s full of life! It’s full of passion!
它泛着性♥爱♥的湿气!它终于有了力量
It reeks with humid sexuality! It’s carnivorous at last!
你觉得我的第一稿是卖♥♥弄辞藻不温不火的? – 我只是说剧情和对白
You thought my first draft was cerebral and tepid? – Only the plot and dialogue.
可是这… – 那…那…难道在第一稿里就没有任何东西…
But this… – Was-Was-Was there nothing in the original draft…
让你觉得可取?
that you feel is worth saving?
舞台调度是清晰的,是我见过最好的
The stage directions were lucid. Best I’ve ever seen.
还有封面的颜色,好品位 – 谢谢
And the color of the binder. Good choice. – Thank you.
我在舞台调度这方面一直挺有心得
I always had a flare for stage directions.
我回顾重读了你的前作,它们都有着同样的问题
I went back and reread your earlier plays. They suffered from the same problem.
创意不错,但是太做作了,缺乏胆识
Good ideas, but too contrived, no real guts.
看来你终于开窍了
It’s like you finally happened.
海伦,我要向你坦白 – 什么?
Helen, I have a confession to make. – Yes?
我… – 不要说!
I… – Don’t speak!
不,不,不要说,我知道你想要反驳
No, no, don’t speak. I know you wanna deprecate yourself.
我知道,但是你就要像风暴一样接管这座城了
I know you do, but you’re going to take this town by storm.
我并没有…
I didn’t…
意识到你给我的写作…
realize what an inspiration…
带来了多大灵感
you’ve been to my writing.
哦,戴维
Oh, David.
亲爱的,亲爱的戴维
Dear, dear David.
尖锐的,愤怒的艺术家
Pungent, seething artist.
终于破茧而出
The cocoon has opened.
我愿意把我的身体毫无保留地献给,写出那些对白的男人
I would give my body freely to the man who wrote those words.
那些辉煌的,强烈的对白
Those glorious, powerful words.
海伦… – 不,不要说话
Helen… – No, don’t speak.
不要说,不要说,不要,沉默,沉默
Don’t speak. Don’t speak. No. Silence. Silence.
不要说 – 求你了
Don’t speak. – Please.
九月二十八日,工作变得顺利许多
September 28. The play is working much better now.
海伦和伊甸相处的越来越好,我相信她开始喜欢那条狗了
Helen has been getting on more pleasantly with Eden, and I believe she likes Mr. Woofles.
退后!退后!退后!退后!
Back! Back! Back! Back!
似乎华纳·普赛尔和奥利芙,一直在互送秋波
Warner Purcell and Olive seem to always be exchanging coy glances.
我不知道我是否多疑,但华纳好像重了几斤
I don’t know if it’s my imagination, but he seems to have put on a little weight.
可能是快要到来的波士顿首演给了他压力,让他又开始偷吃
Perhaps the tension of our upcoming Boston opening has caused him to cheat on his diet.
我们能从“父辈的神明”那里开始了吗?
Can we go from “God of our fathers”?
从那儿开始
Take it from “God of our fathers.”
哦!父辈的神明!救救我!救救我!
Oh! God of our fathers, help me! Help me!
我在考虑当西尔维娅,在那个疯子住的地方时…
I was thinkin’ about when Sylvia’s in the crazy house…
疗养院 – 对,对
Sanitarium. – Yeah, yeah, yeah.
她酗酒过量,然后她看到些东西 – 她出现了幻觉
She gets the D.T.s, and she sees things. – She hallucinates.
不,她看见些东西,你知道,一些幻影 – 什么样的幻影?
No, she sees things. You know, like visions. – Like what kind of visions?
比如说她的亡夫,这样他们就能进行那场对话了 – 在第三幕的那场?
Like her dead husband, and then they have that talk. – The one in the third act?
没错,在他活着时她不敢面对他
That’s right. She couldn’t face up to him when he was alive.
这太棒了,太棒了,太棒了
That’s great. That’s great. That’s great.
是不错 – 我怎么就没想到呢?
It is great. – Why didn’t I think of that?
乔,来杯啤酒
Joe, gimme a beer.
太棒了,全都太棒了
That’s great. It’s all great.
怎么了?
What’s the matter?
没事,我得休息一会
Nothin’. I just gotta take a break for a minute.
你要休息会? – 嗯
You wanna take a break? – Yeah.
好吧 – 抽筋了
All right. – Got a cramp.

Man.
这地方…这地方不错
It’s a nice…nice spot.
我在这呆很久了 – 是吗?
Come here a long time. – Yeah?
嗯 – 你在这出生的?在附近住?
Yeah. – You from around here? You live around here?
生在纽约,长在纽约,西四十五大街 – 嗯
New York, born and raised. West 45th Street. – Mmm.
家里人多吗? – 不多
Got a big family? – No.
有个姐姐住在新泽西
Got a sister who lives in Jersey.
我有过一个哥哥,但他被杀了
I had a brother, but he got killed.
抱歉 – 没什么
I’m sorry. – It’s all right.
卡纳西:位于布鲁克林
他欠了高♥利♥贷♥,债主把他带到卡纳西,在他头上开了窟窿
He welshed on some Shylocks. They took him out to Canarsie, shot him through the head.
你哥哥?
Your brother?
你是怎么进这行的?
How’d you get into your line of work?
我这行? – 对
My line of work? – Yeah.
因为我父亲,他真是很顽强
My father. Was he tough.
你想过要转行吗?
You ever think about doin’ anything else?
转到哪行? – 比如写作这行
Like what? – Like writing.
写作 – 对
Writing. – Yeah.
得了,我十六岁就开始替黑帮收保护费了 – 你很有天赋
Come on, I’ve been collecting for the Mob since I was 16. – You have a huge gift.
呵呵 – 不,我说真的,真的,它是…这天赋是不可思议的
Yeah. – No, I’m serious. Really, it’s…it’s uncanny.
我是说,你的直觉,惊人的直觉 – 听我说
I mean, your instincts. Dramatic instincts. – Listen to me.
真的很让我眼红 – 你的剧本很不错,你的剧本很不错
Your play was very good. Your play was very good. – Really enviable.
你只是不动脑思考,有时候人们就是不愿动脑子
You just didn’t use your head. Sometimes people don’t think.
哦,当然了,对你来说都很简单,你知道吗?
Well, sure, for you it’s simple, you know?
对一个天才来说一切都是自然而然的,可对一个平庸的人…
To someone who can draw, it all seems logical, but for someone who can’t…
我跟所有老师学过写作,我读过每一本书
I studied playwriting with every teacher. I read every book.
让我跟你说说老师,我恨老师
Let me tell you about teachers. I hate teachers.
那帮蓝眼婊♥子♥整天拿尺子打我们,别提老师了
Those blue-haired bitches used to whack us with rulers. Forget teachers.
我小时候认识个男孩,他会弹手风琴 – 是吗?
There was a boy I knew when I was growing up, and he played accordion. – Yeah?
我爱手风琴,我练来练去,终于练得流畅了
I loved accordion. And I practiced and practiced, and I got fluent.
但他只要奏出一个音符,那声音就能让你感动到流泪
Yet he would squeeze one single note, and the sound of it would make you cry.
我曾经想要跳舞,你懂吗? – 感动到流泪
I used to want to dance. You know that? – Make you cry.
我说真的,你见过乔治·拉夫特跳舞吗? – 哦,当然
I mean it. You ever see George Raft dance? – Oh, yeah.
嗯… – 怎么?
So… – What?
马克斯先生说你,呃,说你“清理”过一些人,真的吗?
Mr. Marx says that you, uh, actually rubbed a few people out. Is that true?
这算什么,你要定我罪? – 根本不是

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