冒牌天神（2003）

Get out of there!
出来!
“Are you blind?” No, but I’m late.
你是”瞎子”吗? 不 但我要迟到了
Is your child in dire jeopardy?
你的孩子正面临死亡的威迫吗?
Find out tonight after the game.
今晚比赛后告你
Promos are approved.
Ok 通过了
Jack? Shouldn’t we be focusing on Pete’s retirement?
杰克 我们不是应该关注多点皮特的退休吗?
This is his last week. Any word on the anchor position?
这星期以后他就不做了 对 他的职位会空出来
Evan, when I know something, you’ll know something.
埃文 我想到的事 你总能想到
Sorry I’m late.
对不起 我来迟了
Traffic was…
大塞车
Did you already play the spots?
你们看过我的报道了吗?
Nice story, but we’re going with Evan’s piece.
你的故事挺有趣 布鲁斯 但我们还是挑了埃文的
The sex scandal in the mayor’s office for sweeps.
市长内阁的性丑闻事件
Yeah. Sweeps.
噢 对 丑闻
And that’s the way the cookie crumbles.
曲奇是这样制成的
I’m just messing with you, Bruce.
我印象深刻 布鲁斯
See, you just gotta remember that the newsroom is like a big cookie.
你要记住 新闻就像一大块 曲奇
Do you like jazz, Evan? Let me play something for you.
埃文你喜欢爵士乐吗? 让我为你奏一曲
I can hold that note all day. Knock it off, guys.
我可以给你看一整天 伙计们 冷静点
We’ll keep your story in reserve.
布鲁斯 你的报道我会留着后备
Can we get back to the board so we’ll have something to put on the air today?
现在看着白板 看看今天应该播放什么
Great choice, Jack. The Cadillac of bolognas.
有眼光 杰克! 这些是最上等的
Jack, can I talk to you?
杰克 能谈几句吗?
Sure. What do you need? Sweeps.
当然 布鲁斯 说吧 是报道
Jack, hear me out. I’m starting to get desperate.
杰克 你一定要帮帮我
I’m pushing 40 and what have I got to show?
我已经40了 我以后怎么过?
I’ve hit a kind of ceiling.
我在这里已经变了一个傻瓜
There’s an anti-Bruce barrier I can’t get past.
我的前途有一个”反 布鲁斯”的牌子 不让我通过
And Evan is loving it.
但埃文呢 他受人崇拜
He gets the stories, he gets on sweeps… I should be more like Evan.
他有他的故事 有他的素材 我想我也应该有这样的待遇
Don’t be like Evan. Evan’s an asshole.
你想像埃文一样? 埃文是个混♥蛋♥
I can be an asshole. No, Bruce. You can’t.
我也可以做个混♥蛋♥ 不 布鲁斯 你不能
You going to pick that up? Yeah. I’m sorry.
还不给我捡起来? 对不起
This anchor thing opening up has got me nuts.
我太想成为台柱了
Hi, Susan. Hi, Jack.
嗨 苏珊 嗨 杰克
You’re a good reporter. You make people laugh.
布鲁斯 你是个好记者 你能让观众笑
All right. I’ll tell you what.
好了 这样吧今天是
Today is the 156th anniversary of the Maid Of The Mist.
“雾之少女”号♥的156岁纪念
I want you in Niagara Falls in an hour.
我要你到瀑布里呆一个小时 “雾之少女”号♥制♥造♥周年纪念?
The Maid Of The Mist is always live.
那就是直播了?
Evan always does the live feeds. Now you and Evan get the live feeds.
但我不是干直播的人 那你现在就是干直播的人
I’m going live? During sweeps?
我要直播新闻?
Watch your step. I’ve seen your out takes.
但小心点布鲁斯 这次可不能剪片的
Jack, you will not regret this.
杰克 你一定不会后悔的
And I won’t forget you when I go national.
我出名后一定不会忘记你的
Can you…?
能不能?
Thanks, pal.
谢谢
Can I have your wish now? I’ll put it in the wish jar.
你的愿望星好了吗? 放到这瓶里 谢谢
Put your wish in.
把愿望放到瓶子里
Me, too. Put your wish in.
我也有 放到这瓶里
That looks like a big wish.
看 这一定是个很大的愿望
No, Martin, don’t eat that.
噢 别! 别! 马克不要吃
Don’t put that in your mouth. That’s paste, honey.
这是浆糊 不要放到嘴里去
That must have tasted awful. Mommy!
一定是很难吃的 妈咪
Did you have a good time with Aunt Gracie today?
今天有没有听 格雷斯阿姨的话?
See how nice this is? Baby on the hip. It’s amazing. You’ve become Mom.
看着多棒 抱着一个宝宝 噢 太棒了
The transformation is complete.
你已经是”妈妈”了 成功转型了
I’ll get it.
我来听
Small Wonders Day Care. Grace?
小奇观托儿所 格雷斯?
It’s Debbie, the sister whose life you’re not wasting.
不 我是黛比 被你毁掉幸福的人的姐姐
OK. Bye, Debbie!
好了 我来听 你好 黛比!
Hi. Sorry.
你好!
Debbie forgot to take her meds today. Where are you?
不要怪黛比 你在哪?
A little place called the winner’s circle.
一个旅游胜地
I’m at the falls, doing a live report.
我在瀑布里 要做现场直播
Live? That’s great!
做现场直播? 那太好了!
Yeah! It’s happening, hon. I got sweeps and I’m live.
对! 就是这样 亲爱的 像埃文一样有机会
They’re seeing if I can think on my feet.
知道这是什么意思吗? 我不用再靠人了
Like I might have to do in a live anchor situation.
我快要成为主持人了
Oh, my gosh.
我的天
Yeah! Jack practically came out and told me.
对! ! 实际上 杰克 要让我上位
Practically?
实际上?
He didn’t spell it out. Legally, he can’t.
对 他没有说出来 因为在程序上他不能说
This is what happened to Susan Ortega
但现在就像苏珊·奥尔特加成为真正主持人前
before they bumped her up to the desk.
所经历的一样
It’s good.
太好了 太好了
Well, honey, I just don’t want you to get too ahead of yourself.
太好了 但亲爱的 现在还不应该太高兴
Bruce. I got to go!
布鲁斯 我要开始了
They’re calling me in. OK, honey. Good luck. I love you.
他们在叫我了 好的 亲爱的 好运 我爱你!
Let’s do it.
来吧
They want you close to the falls. I’m going to get soaked.
他们向你接近瀑布 真的? 那不就要湿了
That’s the point. They want you to put this on.
正是这样 他们要你戴上这个
Part of the condition of us getting the exclusive.
保持你一向的形象
You know what? Nothing can bother me today. Nothing.
知道吗? 今天我什么都不介意
Now remember, it’s their 156th-year anniversary.
好了记住 是156岁
149 capacity. They cater to tourists, honeymooners…
有149个旅客 他们有的来度假 有的来度蜜月
And people who are insanely thirsty. I get it.
还有想来喝水的人 明白了
You’re going to interview Irene Dansfield.
还有你要采访艾琳
Irene, a pleasure to meet you. You look beautiful.
艾琳! 很高兴见到你 真的 你看上去好漂亮
Irene’s mother rode on the maiden voyage.
艾琳的母亲参加过这船的处♥女♥行
Rub that in my face! 90 seconds!
哇! 那可真令人吃惊 90秒? 天啊
Holy hell.
90秒? 呼…
Because of the fast response,
由于快速行动 所有有毒物质
the chemicals were cleaned up without incident. Susan?
在事故发生前已经撤走 苏珊
Bruce Nolan is at Niagara Falls.
布鲁斯·诺兰 现在正在尼加拉瓜大瀑布前
But before we go live to Bruce, we have an announcement.
但在布鲁斯的直播前 我们有一则重要新闻
As everyone knows, after 33 years,
大家都知道 我们敬爱的皮特
our beloved Pete Fineman is retiring.
在工作33年后宣布退休
Pete’s shoes are virtually impossible to fill, but the show must go on.
皮特已经不会再工作了 但他的节目还会继续下去
And we could think of no one better than our very own Evan Baxter.
没人能代替他的地位 除了埃文·巴克斯特
Oh, boy!
噢 老天
Congratulations. I’m thrilled and honored.
恭喜你 埃文 谢谢
As you said, no one can replace Pete, but I will do my best.
像你所说的 没人能代替伟大的皮特 但我会尽力的
I am so proud to be a part of our local community of Buffalo.
我必须说 能成为水牛镇的市民很荣幸
I think, in a lot of ways, a great city is like a great recipe, really.
而我相信 一个伟大的城市就像一张伟大的菜谱
You take hard-working citizens, add some care-givers,
放点勤劳 加点团结
maybe a few nuts!
或许加几片”傻瓜”
All sprinkled with the love and support of our good families.
所有这些再加上来自家庭的爱与鼓励
Ultimately, that makes one sweet place to live.
就炒成一道 甜蜜之家
That was amazing. I wish I’d written something.
说的很好 没什么 只是有感而发
And now let’s go live to that wacky
现在让我们回到报道现场
Bruce Nolan at Niagara Falls.
怪人布鲁斯·诺兰 在尼加拉瓜大瀑布报道
Hey, wacky Bruce!
嘿 怪人 布鲁斯
Talk, Bruce. Hello. Talk, honey.
布鲁斯? 说话啊 布鲁斯 喂? 说话啊 亲爱的
What’s going on? A Walt Disney.
怎么回事? 那个怪人
It’s frozen solid. Check the feed.
他定格了 可能是没声音 检查信♥号♥♥
We may be having technical difficulty.
我们遇到一点技术问题
The feed’s good, Jack. Come on.
信♥号♥♥没问题 杰克 说话啊 布鲁斯!
Talk, Bruce, damn it. Get ready to pull the plug.
该死的! 做好最坏打算
Come on, baby. Say something!
亲爱的 说话啊 说话啊
Bruce, talk.
布鲁斯 说话!
Hi, Susan. Thank you, God.
嗨 苏珊! 谢天谢地
Bruce Nolan here,
这里是布鲁斯·诺兰
aboard the Maid Of The Mist in fabulous Niagara Falls, New York.
我在”雾之少女”号♥上 身后是纽约美丽的尼加拉瓜大瀑布
First, let me just add another congratulations to Evan Backstabber.
首先 让我恭喜 埃文·巴克斯特
Pardon me, Bastard… Baxter.
应该是埃文大混♥蛋♥
It is good to see what someone with real talent can do
让我们看看他有没有能耐
when great opportunities are given to them instead of me.
应付本来应该给我的好机会
Anyway, I’m here with Katharine Hepburn’s mom.
无论如何 我身边的是凯瑟琳的母亲
Why did you throw the Heart of the Ocean jewel over the railing of the Titanic ?
告诉我 为什么你要把海洋之心带上泰坦尼克号♥?