单亲度假村

脱掉它
Ok, take it off
不
No
看 这格的衣服甚至还都有价格标签
Look, this whole rack still has a price tag on
严格来说 她还没有真正拥有这些衣服
Technically she hasn’t taken the ownership yet
此外 她还在网球俱乐部
Besides she is at the tennis club
现在试试这个
Now try this on
这件衣服 能把被男人骗的女人变成
This dress can change a woman from the type of man she is on
诱惑男人的女人
To the type of man she is with
我要去小便
I am gonna go pee
贵的 贵的
Expensive, expensive
最贵的
Most expensive
我不知道你穿上会那么漂亮
I did not know you are gonna look that good in it
宝贝 怎么了
Honey, what’s wrong?
我本应该更努力的
I should have tried harder
我本应该穿得更性感点
I should have dressed sexier
你没有做错 马可就是一头猪
You did’t do anything wrong, Mark is a pig
孩子们不知道
Children do not know that
他们只是
They just…
他们想要我们重新在一起
They want us to get back together
我不知道怎么向他们解释
I do not know how to explain it to them
是时候让他们知道他们的爸爸是废物
It’s time for them to know that their dad is a big pie of crap
太郁闷了
I get depressed
我必须穿性感高跟鞋
I need to wear high sexy heels
别跑步了 -它有帮助
-Stop jogging -It helps
你要吓坏我了
It’s freaking me out
看
Look
我太滑稽了
I’m ridiculous
过来
Come here
我支持你
Jen got you
现在我明白了人们为什么叫你衣橱女王
Now I see why they call you closet queens
-晒照片 -发微博
-Instagram -Facebook
太棒了
Yes!
真是个烂借口 哥们 完全是八竿子打不着啊
It was horrible, man, there was no connection at all
我很高兴 你想到了雪崩
I was so happy when you came up with the Avalanche thing
你救了我的命
That saved my life
她穿得像个副校长
And the way she dressed was like an assistant principal or something
搞得我觉得放学后会被留堂似的
I thought I was in detention
我有个女人介绍给你 –是吗
I got a girl for you -Yes?
我舞蹈班上的金发女郎
A blond lady, from the belly dancing class
有点微胖
A little bit on the process
但是当她动起来 那个波涛汹涌啊
But when she gets to move all flapping can make it happen
这个大块头的女人让你感觉飓风来了那样在动
That big girl hit that floor like a hurricane
我落伍了 兄弟 我再也不约会了
I am out , man. No more dates for me
我应该把时间和金钱花在女儿身上
It is time and money that be spending with my daughters
看 谁来了
Look who it is
嘿 拉里 我的大明星
Hey Lary！ My own star！
-来 击个掌 –希拉里 爸爸 已经够糟了
Give me some -Hilary! dad !Which is bad enough
你打算让我一直把手悬着吗
Are you going to leave me hanging?
猜猜 有什么好消息 新的科迪亚克帐篷到了
Guess what, the new Kodiak tents just arrived
正好春假时候
In time for Spring break
我们今年又要去后院露营吗
We are going camping in our backyard again this year?
怎么了 你长大了不想玩了吗
Why? , Are you too old for that?
不 我班上的同学
No, it’s some guys in my class
去弗罗里达或科罗拉多 甚至是瑞士
are going to Florida or Colorado or even Switzerland
好吧 你们的同学都是高富帅白富美
Ok, you got a lot of rich kids in your school
我还能怎样 我们没有那么多钱
What do you want from me? We do not have that kind of money
我知道 能去别的地方就好了
I know, but just be nice go some place
你知道带她去哪里不会很贵吗
You know where you can take them and is cheap?
我的肚皮舞班
My belly dacing class
收起来吧 我说真的
Put that away, seriously
打扰了 先生
Excuse me sir
我是来拿我的篮球校服的
I’m here to pick up my basketball uniform
你刚才是不是叫我”先生”
Did you just call me “Sir”?
是的
Yeah
我是女生
I am a girl
那是个相当丑的女生
That’s a rather ugly girl
嘿 朋友 那是他女儿
Hey man, it’s his daughter
嘿 宝贝 你的数学作业怎么样了
Hey sweetie, how is your math homework coming?
补习老师有作用吗
Is any of the tutor shortcuts helping?
你约会了吗
You went out on a date?
约会 谁告你我约会了
A date? Who told you I went on a date?
你该换邮箱密♥码♥了
You should change your email password
072099小姐
Miss 072 099
这是我最后一次用你的生日做密♥码♥了
That’s the last time I use your birthday as key
我不敢相信你竟然偷看我的邮件
I can not believe you read my post
布兰登 我爱你
Brendan, I love you
但我们得学会尊重彼此的隐私
But we have to learn to respect privacy in this house another
吉姆是谁
Who is Jim?
他谁也不是 亲爱的
No, honey
他只是个逗乐小丑
A jester
相信我
Believe
什么事情都没有
It was nothing
-你发誓 -我发誓
Promise? -I promise
嘿 不能在家里玩滑轮
Hey no wheels at home
我说过的
Like I said
抓住他 妈妈
balo mom, dale
你和你♥爸♥爸是不是在回家路上去吃了冰淇淋
Your dad took you for ice cream back home?
-打他屁♥股♥ -巧克力雪糕上海撒了薄荷巧克力碎片
Give a spanking -Chocolate chip
-打趴他 -我站在了世界之巅 噢耶
Throw it down! -I’m on top of the world!
-哈哈 -你死定了
Yes! -You’re dead!
不要再捏乳♥头♥了 你俩调皮鬼
Stop twisting the nipples
人身上就两个乳♥头♥
Only have two for the rest of their lives
你们得尊重好爱惜好它们
They have to learn to love and respect them
我一直都这样
I always did
我告诉你多少次了
How many times have I told you
在你送他回来不要给他吃高糖分的东西
Do not fill it with sugar before you drop him off?
别这样 跟爸爸出去吃冰淇淋蛋卷
Come on, out with dad for an ice cream cone
可以让孩子回味很久呢
It is a durable memory for a child
哦 好啊
Oh, ok good if
如果爸爸能花多点时间陪他
Dad spent more time with him
他就不用去一直回味这个了
The memories would not have to be as “Durable”
又被抓到了 和你呆在一起的时间真愉快 劳伦
Got me again, it’s so nice spending time with Lauren
包不是放在那的
That’s not their place
我们该怎么办
What do we do?
哦 糟了 它要爆♥炸♥了 三 二 谢天谢地
It will explode in 3, 2…thank God
太危险了
It was close
将近一分钟的混乱状态
Almost was disorganized for one minute
-你好 -你最近过得怎么样
Hello -How are you?
挺好的 泰勒星期六有比赛你要去吗
Well, are you going to party Tyler on Saturday?
去啊 当然要去
Yes!, Of course!
太棒了 我要把你放下来
Great, I’ll write down
你最在行了
It’s what you do best
我是说放在板上 马克 在板上
Mark on the Board, on the Board
劳伦 孩子不需要黑板 不需要你列清单
Lauren kids do not need a blackboard, need a list
他们知道可以指望我 就这样
They know they can count on me, that’s all
爸爸 你可以帮我完成作业吗
Dad, can you help me with my homework?
噢 我不行 哥们 对不起 我有事要做
Oh, sorry I can’t. I have to go to a “Thing”
问你妈妈吧 这并不能证明什么
Ask your mother, this does not prove my behavior
你走了吗
Is he gone?
-拉里 你想要去打篮球吗 -爸
Hilary? Want to go to…? -Dad!
出去
Get out
你干嘛不敲门
Why wouldn’t you knock?
对不起 宝贝 我什么都没看到
Sorry, did not see anything
噢 真是谢谢你
Thank you very much
不 不 不
No, no, no
有大把好看的
There was plenty to see
我只是没看见什么胶体的东西
I just do not see anything weird
-碰个拳怎么样 -不要
What if bumped fists? -No
拉里 我们都需要来一个
Both need
我们没事了
We are good