比尔和泰德历险记（1989）

好吧
OK.
戴着木头假牙 追过大白鲸
Had wooden teeth, chased Moby Dick.
坊间传闻乔治·华盛顿的假牙是木质的
那是亚哈船长《白鲸》 老兄
That’s Captain Ahab, dude.
等等 还记得迪士尼乐园里的总统大厅吗
Oh, wait. Remember Disney World, the Hall of Presidents?
记得 不错 他说了什么
Yeah, good, what’d he say?
“欢迎来到总统大厅”
“Welcome to the Hall of Presidents.”
你们好呀 我给你们拿了点吃的来
Hi, I brought you guys some food.
她是你妈 老兄
It’s your mom, dude!
怎么样了 伙计们
How’s it going, guys?
不妙
Bad!
我们明天一定会挂得很惨
We are destined to flunk most egregiously tomorrow.
而我一定会被送去奥茨军校了
And I am destined to end up at Oates Military Academy.
我们永远都组不成乐队了
And then we will never start our band.
很好
Good.
-你们在学什么 -历史
– What are you guys studying anyway? – History.
瑞恩老师吗
Mr. Ryan?
代我向他问好
Tell him, “Hi.”
要不你们去吃个晚饭休息一下吧
Why don’t you guys take a dinner break?
谢了 爸
Thanks, Dad.
你♥爸♥居然现在就要来一发 还是在你房♥间里
Now your dad’s going for it… in your own room!
闭嘴吧 泰德
Shut up, Ted.
-你继母确实很可爱 -闭嘴吧 泰德
– Your stepmom is cute, though. – Shut up, Ted.
你记得我还邀请过她去舞会吗
Remember when I asked her to the prom?
闭嘴吧 泰德
Shut up, Ted!
Twelve-seventy-five, twelve-seventy-five, twelve-seventy-five…
好了 车里那个女士说
OK, the lady in that car over there said
马可·波罗在1275年
that Marco Polo was in the year 1275.
我就知道波罗不只是水上运动
So it’s not just a water sport, I knew it.
Polo亦指水球
打扰一下 蒙古人什么时候统治了中国
Excuse me, when did the MongoIs rule China?
我可不知道 我只是来上班而已
I don’t know. I just work here.
要不去平价市场试试
Well, you wanna try the Thrifty Mart?
好啊
Sure.
不错啊
Not bad.
我出色的朋友们 你们好
Greetings, my excellent friends.
你知道蒙古人什么时候统治了中国吗
Do you know when the MongoIs ruled China?
这个嘛 不如我们去问问他们本人吧
Well… perhaps we could ask them.
比尔·S·普雷斯顿先生
Bill S. Preston, Esquire…
还有泰德·”西奥多”·洛根
and Ted “Theodore” Logan.
先生们 我是来帮你们完成历史报告的
Gentlemen, I’m here to help you with your history report.
什么
What?
怎么帮
How?
我讨厌这个环节
l hate that part.
-比尔 -干嘛
– Bill? – What?
OK便利店发生了诡异的事
Strange things are afoot at the Circle K.
老兄 你们要穿越时空了
Dudes, you guys are gonna go back in time.
没错
Yeah!
你们即将步入史上最精彩的探险之旅
You are going to have a most excellent adventure through history.
-你们是谁 -我们就是你们啊 老兄
– Who are you guys? – We’re you, dude!
不可能 不可能
No way. No way!
非常可能 泰德
Yes way, Ted!
听着 我们知道你们怎么想
Look, we know how you feel.
我们还是你们时也不敢相信
We didn’t believe it either when we were you
而那时的我们也说了现在的你们说过的话
and we-us said what we-us are saying right now.
慢着 如果你们真的是我们…
OK wait, if you guys are really us…
我们心里在想什么数
what number are we thinking of?
69 老兄
Sixty-nine, dudes!
听着 我们得走了
Look, we’ve gotta go.
没错 我们要去完成报告了
Yeah, we gotta get back to the report.
鲁弗斯
Rufus!
好好听这家伙的话 鲁弗斯 他很在行
Listen to this dude, Rufus. He knows what he’s talking about.
没错 还有泰德 代我向公主们问好
Right. Oh, and Ted, give my love to the princesses.
-谁 -你一会就知道了
– Who? – You’ll see.
先生们 一切都好吗
Gentleman… is everything all right?
还好 但为什么…
Yeah, except, how come…
泰德 别忘记给表上发条
Ted, don’t forget to wind your watch!
谢谢 鲁弗斯
Thanks, Rufus.
回见 比尔和泰德
Catch ya later, Bill and Ted.
老兄 你确定我们该这么做吗
Dude, are you sure we should be doing this?
泰德 我俩经历过风风雨雨
Ted, you and I have witnessed many things,
可什么都没刚才这事更大胆刺♥激♥
but nothing as bodacious as what just happened.
再说 我们自己让我们听这家伙的话
Besides we told ourselves to listen to this guy.
万一我们在撒谎呢
What if we were lying?
我们为什么要对自己撒谎
Why would we lie to ourselves?
你要怎么帮我们
How are you gonna help us?
是啊 你要打电♥话♥问别人要答案吗
Yeah, are you gonna call someone and get the answers?
先生们 我们要做的比这多得多
Gentlemen, we’re gonna do a lot more than that.
棒呆了
Excellent.
打起精神来 朋友们
Brace yourselves, amigos.
先生们
Gentlemen…
我们就是历史
we’re history.
鲁弗斯 我们在哪里 老兄
Rufus, where are we, dude?
这些是历史电路 先生们
These are the circuits of history, gentlemen.
它们能带我们去往想去的任何时间点
They’ll take us to any point in time we wish.
怎么做到的
How?
现代科技 威廉
Modern technology, William.
-这真是绝无仅有的体验 鲁弗斯 -没错
– That was most unprecedented, Rufus. – Yeah.
不过我们在哪里 鲁弗斯
But where are we, Rufus?
1805年的奥地利 法国人刚刚入侵
Austria, 1805, the French have just invaded.
比尔 快看
Bill, check it out!
我们在战争里呢 老兄
We’re in the middle of a war, dude!
朋友们 该走了
Amigos, time to depart.
怎么样啊 老兄
How’s it going, dude?
炸死他们
快去啊
现在是在哪里 老兄
Now where are we, dude?
是我家啊
Oh, it’s my house.
鲁弗斯 我们真的能随时去往任何地方吗
Rufus, can we go anywhere we want, at any time?
先生们 你们可以随心所欲
Gentlemen, you can do anything you want,
只要记住一点
as long as you remember this:
不论发生什么 你们必须要完成报告
no matter what happens, you must get to that report.
记住了吗
Got it?
好了 朋友们 不管你们想去哪里
All right, amigos, that book will give you the number
《历史电路号♥码簿》
历史就在指间
都能这本书里找到相应的编码
of any place you want to go.
最重要的是
Now, most important,
不管你做什么 不管你去哪里
no matter what you do, no matter where you go,
那只手表 圣迪马斯的手表
that clock, the clock in San Dimas,
绝对不能停走 清楚了吗
is always running. Got it?
-清楚了 -好吧 我该走了
– Yeah. – All right, time for me to go.
你什么意思 鲁弗斯
What do you mean, Rufus?
是啊 你不和我们一起吗
Yeah, aren’t you coming with us?
先生们 你们只能靠自己了
Gentlemen, you’re on your own.
-泰德 -干嘛
– Ted? – What?
今天真是非同寻常的一天
This has been a most unusual day.
-泰德 这是拿破仑 -谁
– Ted, it’s Napoleon. – Who?
历史复习课里那个矮小死了的哥们
The short, dead dude from our history review.
泰德 我有个大胆的想法
Ted, I have a most excellent idea.
你抬他腿 我们得把他弄进屋子里
Grab his legs, we gotta get him inside.
我想到完成报告的办法了
I think I’ve figured out a way to pass our report.
什么办法
How?
我们已经有了一个历史人物
Well, we’ve got one historical figure here.
也许我们可以重回历史多找几个来
Maybe we can go back and get some more.
是啊
Yeah!
迪肯 你必须看好这个人
Deacon, you have to watch this guy.
他叫拿破仑 是个很有名的法国人
His name is Napoleon. He’s a very famous French dude.
我们决定要回到历史 找几个大人物
We have decided to collect other important figures from history
好完成我们的口头报告
for an oral report we are doing.
我们不在的时候 你不能让他离开你的视线
While we are gone, you are not to let him out of your sight.
给你点钱
Here is some money.
带他看看电影什么的
Take him to the movies or something.
拿破仑 我是比尔