冒牌老爸

我爱你
I love you.
什么?
What?
不用担心 没什么
Don’t be scared. It’s all right.
我可没担心
I’m not scared.
如果得到Julian的抚养权 我就永远是他父亲了
If I get custody of Julian, I’ll be his father forever.
你担心我很可能失败
That scares you because you think there’s a good chance I’ll fail.
Sonny 不是可能 而是肯定
Sonny, it’s more than a chance. It’s a certainty.
你错了 老爸
You’re wrong, Dad.
如果我在治安不好的地方被偷了钱包
You can be scared that I might get pickpocketed in a bad neighbourhood…
或者滑雪时摔断了腿 你可以担心
…or break my legs skiing.
但是不要担心我当不好这个爸爸 因为我不可能失败
But don’t be scared about me being a dad, because I will not fail.
我太爱这孩子了
I love this kid too much.
我像你爱我一样爱他 老爸
I love him as much as you love me, Dad.
我会给他建议 引导他
I’m gonna give him advice and I’m gonna guide him…
在他需要我的时候帮他
…and I’ll be there whenever he needs me.
我会为了他的庭审飞到纽约
I’ll fly to New York to be at his court case…
哪怕我起初不认同他的做法
…even if I disagree with why he’s there.
但是 Sonny 你在收费站工作
But, Sonny, you work in a tollbooth.
别担心钱
Don’t worry about money.
我爱上了一个能赚不少钱的漂亮姑娘
I am in love with a beautiful girl who makes plenty of it.
她是我的小富婆
She’ll be my sugar mama.
我应该也找一个
I gotta get me one of those.
我认为这是我该做的 因为我可以为这孩子献出生命
I know this is the right thing because I would die for this kid…
只要他能过的快乐
…just so he won’t feel one ounce of sadness.
这也正是你来这里的原因 来保护我 来关心我
That’s why you’re here right now, to protect me, to be scared for me…
来当个好父亲
…to be a good father.
我也想像你一样
And that’s exactly what I’m gonna be.
你好 爸爸吗?
Hello, Dad?
对 我就是想说我爱你
Yeah, I just wanted to say I love you.
妈妈? 能让爸爸接一下电♥话♥吗?
Hi, Mom? Could you put Dad on the phone for a second?
你打完能借我吗?
Can I borrow that when you’re done?
法官大人
Your Honour…
我儿子应该得到抚养权
…my son deserves this kid.
我也爱你 长官
I love you too, sir.
Koufax先生
Mr. Koufax…
但事实是你绑♥架♥了这孩子
…the fact is you kidnapped this child.
你不仅不该得到抚养权
Not only shouldn’t you get custody…
而且由于你通过欺骗政♥府♥得到他
…but since you obtained him by defrauding the state…
你应该入狱
…you should be in jail.
法警 在我宣判之前先把他押下去
Bailiff, remand him until I can figure out the punishment.
等等 你不能带走他
Wait. You can’t take him away.
作为孩子的父亲 我拒绝起诉
As that boy’s father, I refuse to press charges.
噢 老天 Corinne 对不起
Oh, God. Corinne, I’m sorry.
6年前Joe Carter
Six years ago, Joe Carter….
Joe Carter?
Joe Carter?
多伦多对费城 职业棒球赛
Toronto and the Phillies. World Series.
Mitch Williams 我们那晚专程飞去看比赛
Mitch Williams– We flew up for the night.
有个女孩
There was a girl.
哦 老天
Oh, God.
我当时很傻很天真
I’m an idiot. I was so hammered.
美味的鸡翅 Molson队3:0获胜
Chicken wings, Molson 3-0.
加拿大啤酒又像月光一样醉人
You know. Canadian beer is like moonshine.
对极了
Hell, yes.
想起来了? 是在多伦多的Hooters餐厅
You remember? It was at that Toronto Hooters.
那时他还没遇见你Hooters餐厅只是个巧合
That was before he met you. That Hooters thing is a coincidence.
对不起 Corinne
I’m sorry, Corinne.
我知道这让会让一切都改变 但我现在必须这样做
I know this changes everything, but I had to do the right thing.
Castellucci先生
Mr. Castellucci.
看验血结果吧
Pending a blood test, l….
随便
Whatever.
本庭核准Kevin Gerrity的抚养权 取决于DNA检验结果
The court grants custody to Kevin Gerrity, pending the DNA test results.
我要你当我爸爸 Sonny
I want you to be my dad, Sonny.
我知道 我也是
I know. I do too, pal.
但我不能保证事情能像我们希望的那样
But I’m not sure that can happen exactly the way we want it.
因为你似乎已经有个爸爸了
Because it seems you already have a daddy.
不过我告诉你我的想法
But I’ll tell you what I can do.
我可以做你的朋友 无论发生什么 好吗?
I can be your friend, no matter what. All right?
我永远是你的朋友
I’ll always be your friend.
永远是你的家人 永远在你身边
I’ll always be your family. I’ll always be around.
我保证
I promise.
这孩子系鞋带还不赖
The kid’s good at tying his shoes.
但还不算太好 得好好教他
He’s not great at it, so work with him.
-我会教他打蝴蝶结 -什么蝴蝶结?
-I’ll teach him bunny ears. -What’s bunny ears?
蝴蝶结啊 交叉 然后拉过去
Make bunny ears, cross and pull them through.
我教的是绕 穿 拉 他喜欢那样
I go with this loop, swoop and pull thing. He likes that.
-我不知道 -还是绕 穿 拉吧
-I don’t know that. -Go with the loop, swoop and pull.
我发誓那样好
I swear to God it’s working.
好吧
All right.
还是打蝴蝶结吧 你才是他爸爸 对吧 对不起
Go with the bunny ears thing. You’re his dad, right? I’m sorry.
这很重要 你在我的餐馆吃饭的时候
It’s important, when you eat at my restaurant…
绝不要点BLT
…you never order BLT.
你要相信我 别点BLT 好吗?
You must trust me. Stay away from BLT, okay?
嘿 你们好
Hey, guys.
要把你交给你♥爸♥爸了 Julian
I’m gonna leave you with your dad now, Julian.
他是个好人 是我一辈子的朋友
He’s a good man. I’ve known him my whole life.
你们俩好好玩 我们明天早上一起吃早饭
So you two have fun and I’ll see you in the morning.
好吧?
All right?
-别再吓唬孩子了 -我吓唬谁了?
-Quit scaring the kid for a minute. -Who am I scaring?
再见 伙计
Bye, pal.
我之前去了中国 你知道是哪里吗?
I went to China. Do you know where that is?
他在亚洲 靠着
It’s in Asia, which is…
欧洲 我买♥♥回来一些很酷的东西
…by Europe. I brought some cool stuff back.
是你动了椅子吗?
Did you move the bench?
很有趣吧
That’s pretty funny.
知道我带了什么? 摔炮 看
You know what I got? Some noisemakers. Check this out.
要试试吗?
Wanna try one?
我的脚
That’s my foot!
你是好人
You’re nice man.
我订了个新频道 挺聒噪 但还不错
I’ve got Spice Channel. It’s blurry but it’s nice.
我们快点 我还得上班呢
Let’s make this quick. I gotta get to work.
见鬼了 Sonny Koufax宁可工作也不吃饭了
Holy shit. Sonny Koufax would rather work than eat.
在忙一个大案子 我要告你们带我来这儿
I’m working on a big case. I gotta sue you for making me come here.
惊喜
Surprise!
你们是不是又把好惊喜浪费在我身上了?
Did you just waste the good surprise on me again?
嗨 Corinne
Hi, Corinne.
-生日快乐 -谢谢 各位
-Happy birthday. -Thanks, everybody.
嘿 你们好啊
Hey, you guys. How are you?
生日快乐 老爸
Happy birthday, Daddy.
你好吗 小可爱?
How you doing, cutie?
Sonny 昨天打篮球我可赢了你
Sonny, I beat you so bad in basketball yesterday.
从现在起 我不会让你赢了
From now on, I have to stop letting you win.
几个月前我就不想让他赢了 他还是赢
I stopped that months ago. He still wins.
那是因为你太菜
That’s because you suck.
Corinne 看在以前的份上 穿上那小背心吧
Corinne, put a tank top on for old time’s sake.
-他在说什么 妈妈? -没什么
-What is he talking about, Mommy? -Nothing.
-生日快乐 Sonny -谢谢
-Happy birthday, Sonny. -Thank you.
是个闹钟收音机
It’s a clock radio.
-谢谢告诉我 -我得走了
-Thanks for telling me. -I have to split.
还有外卖♥♥要送
I got deliveries.
和我们玩吧 会很开心的
Hang out with us. We’ll have fun.
不 我不能呆在这儿 我还是呆一会儿吧
No, I can’t stay. I’ll hang for a little bit.
随你 来吧 用餐吧 各位
There you go. Come on, let’s eat, everybody.
嘿 是你 还想念那颗牙吧?
Hey, you! Still missing that tooth, huh?
给我们些炸鸡好吗?
Can we get some fries?
Vanessa
Vanessa.
你现在是个舞♥女♥?
You’re a Hooters girl?
Sid的5年计划怎么样了?
What happened to Sid’s five-year plan?
你怎么样?
How you doing?
-或许是个10年计划 -是那个长老蛋蛋的家伙吗?
-Maybe it’s a 1 0-year plan. -Is that the guy with the old balls?
我想是的
I think it is.