美剧《风骚律师》

天哪 吉米
For Christ’s sakes, Jimmy!
只能倒着来 明白吗
Backwards only — solo backward-o, yeah?
因为这样才有吸力 杠杆原理啥的
Because, uh, you’ve got suction that way, leverage.
这是物理 物理
It’s physics — el physico!
克利福德先生希望地板干干净净
Oh, Don Clifford wants his floors clean —
清洁干净
limpio, limpiar.
明白吗[以上对话夹杂西语]
Uh. Comprende?
老兄 我是密歇根人
Dude, I’m from Michigan.
所以我刚才说的你一个字都听不懂
So you don’t understand a word I’ve been saying.
那好吧
Well…
晚安
Good night.
来 你试一下 倒着吸
No, you try. Backwards.
不好意思
Excuse me.
请大家注意一下
Can I have everyone’s attention, please?
都能听见吗 很好
Everyone can hear me? Good.
坦白说 我从没想到
Frankly, this is not a conversation
在自己的职业生涯中要进行这种讲话
I ever thought I would have in my professional career,
但我注意到
but it’s been brought to my attention
洗手间出了状况
that we have an ongoing situation in the washroom.
有人上完不冲水
Someone is not flushing.
一次是意外 两次也是
Once is an accident — maybe even twice.
三次就形成模式了
Three times — no, that’s a pattern.
而且还不是小便
And we’re not talking about a number one.
是的 谢谢你 艾琳
Yes. Thank you, Erin.
我不是来给谁难堪的
Now, I’m not here to shame anyone —
我都不想知道是谁干的 但是…
Nor do I even want to know who did it, but —
克利福德 是我♥干♥的
Uh, Cliff, it was me.
吉米 我说了我不想知道
Jimmy, I just said I didn’t want to know.
我们要节约水
Hey, we need the water.
我了解到圣达菲的水位
I read somewhere that the Santa Fe watershed
今年下降了五厘米
is down u202dtwo full inches this year.
每冲一次水
Every time you flush a toilet,
都会浪费一加仑水 一加仑呢
you waste a gallon of water — a gallon!
还有比不冲水更好的节约方法吗
What could be greater than this?
那些都是低流马桶 吉米
They’re low-flow toilets, Jimmy.
从现在开始 你要冲水
From now on, flush.
低流 不错啊
Low-flow — that’s good.
好主意
Good thinking.
什么声音
What is that?
吉米 里面怎么回事
Jimmy, u202dwhat’s goin’ on in there?
吉米
Jimmy!
你隔着门也能听见吗
Oh, you could hear this through the door?
我没注意到 抱歉
I didn’t realize. I’m sorry.
你在干什么
What do you think you’re doing?
我接受了你的建议
Uh, I took your advice.
释放压力
I’m blowing off steam.
释放压力
Blowing off steam?
是啊 就像你弹吉他一样
Yeah, yeah, like you and your guitar, you know?
不得不说 你说得没错
Um, I got to say — you’re right.
这非常有助于缓解压力
I mean, u202dit really helps with stress.
声音不怎么好听 但我刚学
I know I don’t sound very good, but I’m just learning.
我听说关键是要一直让这个气囊充气
I heard that the key is you have to keep this bag inflated.
够了
Enough!
赶紧给我放下来
Put that down. Now.
你来我办公室一趟
I want you in my office.
你赢了
You win.
我赢了什么
What do I win?
你被炒了
You’re fired.
什么 克利福德 如果是因为那个风笛
What? Cliff, if this is about the bagpipes —
不是因为那个风笛
It’s not about the bagpipes.
当然是因为风笛了
Well, of course it’s the bagpipes.
是因为风笛 是因为不冲水
It’s the bagpipes, u202dand it’s the not flushing
还因为你这身…扎眼的所谓西裝
And this — this optical migraine you call a business suit.
是因为…是因为你想保住你的奖金
It’s about — it’s about you keeping your bonus.
都是因为这个
That’s what this is about.
你最近一直在温习合同法吧
Been brushing up on u202dyour contract law, haven’t you?
你显然想离开这里
You want outta here, clearly,
但你不能辞职 否则奖金不保
But you can’t just up and quit and expect to keep your bonus.
如果我因为你的不当行为解雇你
And if I fire you for cause —
在你拍广♥告♥时我就应该炒了你…
Like I should have done for the TV commercial —
奖金也没有
Again, no bonus.
但是
However,
如果无缘无故 就因为你是个混♥蛋♥而解雇你
if I fire you not for cause but for being an all-around jackass…
你就得逞了
Yeah.. u202dHurray for you.
如果你认为我有什么渎职行为…
If you think there’s been some malfeasance here —
省省吧
Oh, save it.
我可以和你争 但我不想浪费时间
I could fight you on this, but you’re not worth my time.
你最好赶紧走人
I’d rather just have you gone.
你这么想我很抱歉
I’m sorry you feel that way.
我去…收拾东西
I’ll just, uh… pack up.
首先…行行好
First… Do me the favor
不要把我当傻子
of not treating me like a fool for once.
告诉我 我到底对你哪里不好了
Tell me — u202dhow exactly did I mistreat you?
我到底做了什么让你这样对我
What did I do to deserve is kind of behavior?
我们给了你机会 鼓励你发展
We gave you opportunities, encouraged you to excel.
给你配了车 配了房♥
We got you a car, an apartment.
还有黄檀木办公桌
Hell, that cocobolo desk.
你在这儿看到过那样的桌子吗
Do you see a desk like that in here?
你根本没有认真考虑
You never gave this a chance.
为什么
Why?
我努力想要适应 真的
I tried to make it work — really, I-I did.
我只是…不适合这里
I’m just… a square peg.
如果你早就知道 为什么还要接受这份工作
If you knew that, why did you take the job?
我很抱歉
I’m sorry.
那张桌子多少钱
How much was the desk?
七千
$7,000.
我会给你开张支票
I’ll write you a check.
随便 虽然不知道有什么用
Fine, u202dfor whatever good that does.
带上你的桌子离开这里
Take your desk and get out.
克利福德 不管怎样 我觉得你是一个好人
Hey, Cliff, for what it’s worth, I think you’re a good guy.
不管怎样 我觉得你是一个混♥蛋♥
For what it’s worth, I think you’re an asshole.
哈姆林先生
抱歉通知你 我将辞去
门开着
Uh, yeah, it’s open.
-吉米 -我能和你谈谈吗
– Jimmy. u202d- Hey. Can I talk to you for a minute?
霍华德知道你来吗
Does Howard know you’re here?
当然不知道 我溜进来的
God, no. I snuck in.
好吧 但是快点
Well, uh, yeah, but make it quick.
其实 我们能不能去会议室谈
Actually, can we, uh, talk in the conference room?
为什么
Why?
这样更正式
It’s just more appropriate.
四点之前没人要开会 我看过了
Um, no one’s gonna need it till 4:00 — I checked.
行吗
Please?
最多十分钟
10 minutes, tops.
你先请
After you.
坐吧
u202dHave a seat.
怎么…怎么回事
What — what is going on?
说吧
Spill it.
好吧
Okay.
斯韦卡特考科利会帮你付清欠哈姆林麦吉尔的债务
Schweikart and Cokely will pay your debt to HHM
并在两年之后将你提拔为合伙人吧
and make you a partner in two years, correct?
显然是的
Apparently.
是这么约定的 怎么了
That’s the deal, yes. Why?
要不要考虑一个更好的工作机会
Would you entertain a better offer?
谁给的 哈姆林麦吉尔联合律所吗
From whom — HHM?
我
From me.
我明天就让你成为合伙人
I’ll make you a partner tomorrow.
以此为证
Consider that proof of concept —
韦克斯勒麦吉尔联合律所
Wexler-Mcgill, partners at law.
你和我一起
You and me, together.
斯韦卡特可以帮你偿还债务 我也可以
If Schweikart can pay your debt, so can I.