爱在日落黄昏时

Vous pouvez me laisser au metro…au metro Chateau d’Eau.
– [法语]好吗？ – [法语]好的，没问题
– Ca ira tres bien. – Entendu!
[法语]谢谢
Merci!
你把你的住址什么的都告诉他了？
You told him where you are and all that?
是的
Yeah.
– 他知道他要去哪了？ – 是的
– He knows where he’s going? – Yes.
太好了
Glad somebody does.
– 这比搭地铁好，对吧？ – 当然
– But this is better than the Metro, right? – Definitely.
我在想，对我来说，还是不要把事情想得太浪漫比较好
I was thinking, for me it’s better I don’t romanticize things as much anymore.
我一直都吃这个亏
I was suffering so much all the time.
我仍旧有很多梦想，但它们都与我的感情生活无关
I still have lots of dreams,but they’re not in regard to my love life.
这样并不会让我不开心，因为事情本来就是这样的
It doesn’t make me sad,it’s just the way it is.
这就是你为什么要和一个不常见面的人发生感情吗？
Is that why you’re in a relationship with somebody who’s never around?
当然，我应付不了那种天天见面的感情
Yes, obviously I can’t deal with the day-to-day life of a relationship.
我们相聚的时候可以充满激♥情♥
Yeah, we have this exciting time together…
…然后他离去了，我会很想他，不过我起码不会痛不欲生
…and he leaves and I miss him,but at least I’m not dying inside.
如果有人一直在我身边，我会觉得窒息！
When someone’s always around me,I’m suffocating.
等等，可是你刚说你想要爱和被爱
No, wait, you just said that you need to love and be loved.
没错，但是当我的确这么做时，这马上会让我恶心！
Yeah, but when I do,it quickly makes me nauseous.
真是个灾难
It’s a disaster.
我是说，我只有一个人独处的时候才会真正开心
I mean, I’m really happy only when I’m on my own.
即使是一个人，也比坐在情人边上却心不在焉要来的好
Even being alone, it’s better than sitting next to a lover and feeling lonely.
浪漫对我来说并不是一件容易的事
It’s not so easy for me to be a romantic.
你开始的时候可能会这么做，不过当你受过几次伤以后…
You start off that way, and after you’ve been screwed over a few times…
…你就会拒绝那些虚幻的想法，接受生活中的现实
…you forget about your delusional ideas and you take what comes into your life.
其实这也不见得对，我并没受过几次伤…
That’s not even true.I haven’t been screwed over…
…我只是有太多平庸的感情了
…I’ve just had too many blah relationships.
他们不是对我不好，他们都很关心我…
They weren’t mean,they cared for me…
…但是我们却没有那种心灵上的沟通，或是发自心底的兴奋
…but there were no real connection or excitement.
起码我这边是这么感觉的
At least, not from my side.
天哪，真遗憾，有这么糟糕吗？
God, I’m sorry, is it really that bad?
没有吧，对吗？
It’s not, right?
你知道吗，其实也不是这样的，我…
You know, it’s not even that.I was….
我本来是好好的，直到我读到你那本该死的书
I was fine until I read your fucking book.
它把陈年往事又翻起来了，你知道吗？
It stirred shit up, you know?
它让我想起了，我曾经真正的浪漫过
It reminded me how genuinely romantic I was…
…我对于世界有过多少希望…
…how I had so much hope in things…
…而我现在已经完全不相信任何爱情了
…and now it’s like I don’t believe in anything that relates to love.
我已经感觉不到人之间的感情了
I don’t feel things for people anymore.
从某种意义上来说，我所有的浪漫都在一夜之间消耗光了…
In a way, I put all my romanticism into that one night…
…而我将永远不可能再有那种感觉了
…and I was never able to feel all this again.
就好像，那一夜不知道怎么，引发了我的全部感情…
Like, somehow this night took things away from me…
…而我把这些感情都向你倾诉出来，而你却把它们都从我身边带走了
…and I expressed them to you,and you took them with you.
这让我感到孤独！好像爱情再也不属于我一样！
It made me feel cold,like love wasn’t for me.
我不相信，我不相信
I don’t believe that.I don’t believe that.
你知道吗？对我来说，现实和爱基本就是矛盾的
You know what? Reality and love are almost contradictory for me.
非常可笑，我每一个以前的男友，他们都结婚了
It’s funny, every single of my exes,they’re now married.
男人约我出去，然后我们分手，然后他们就结婚了
Men go out with me, we break up,and then they get married.
之后之后他们打电♥话♥感谢我，教会了他们什么是爱
And later they call me to thank me for teaching them what love is…
…教会了他们去关心跟尊重女人！
…and that I taught them to care and respect women.
– 我想我也是那些男人中的一个 – 你知道吗，我真想杀了他们！
– I think I’m one of those. – I want to kill them!
他们为什么不向我求婚？我也许会拒绝，但至少他们也应该问我啊！
Why didn’t they ask me? I would have said no, but they could have asked!
但我知道这是我的错，因为我总觉得他们不是我的如意郎君
I know it’s my fault because I never felt it was the right man.
从来没有，但如意的人又是什么呢？你的真爱？
Never. But what does it mean,the right man, the love of your life?
这种想法简直可笑，说什么我们只有找到了另一半人生才是完整的
The concept is absurd. We can only be complete with another person.
– 这太可恶了，不是吗？ – 我能说两句吗？
– It’s evil, right? – Can I talk?
我想我是伤心过太多次了，然后又恢复了
I guess I’ve been heartbroken too many times and then I recovered.
于是现在，从一开始，我就不愿意付出努力
So now, you know, from the starts,I make no effort.
– 因为我知道一定不能成功 – 你不能这样
– I know it’s not gonna work out. – You can’t do that.
你不可以只是为了避免受伤害
You can’t live trying to avoid pain…
– 就付出… – 好啦，我决定了
– …at the expense… – Those are words.
我要离你远远的
I’ve gotta get away from you.
– 停车，我要下车！ – 不，别下车
– Stop the car, I wanna get out. – No, don’t…
– 你知道在你身边… – 请继续讲…
– Keep talking. – It’s being around you.
别碰我！你知道吗，我要叫辆计程车…
Don’t touch me, you know.I want to get on a cab.
[法语]请停车，先生
Monsieur, aretes vous!
[法语]过了红绿灯您就停，我去坐地铁
Non, non, c’est bon, aux feux-la!
别，别停，继续开…
No, don’t. No, no, keep going.
听我说，我真的很高兴…谢谢你，请继续开…
Listen, I’m just so happy…Thank you, just keep going.
好啦
All right.
听我说，我真得很高兴能跟你在一起
Look, I’m just so happy,all right, to be with you.
我真得很高兴你没有忘记我
I am. I’m so glad you didn’t forget about me, okay?
是的，我没有，而这吓坏我了，知道吗？
No, I didn’t.And it pisses me off, okay?
你到巴黎来，给我带来浪漫，但却结了婚
You come here to Paris,all romantic, and married.
去死吧你！
Okay? Screw you.
不要误会我，我并没有想要占有你
Don’t get me wrong,I’m not trying to get you.
我只不过想把自己嫁出去
I mean, all I need is a married man.
这个问题很复杂，这甚至不仅仅是关于你
There’s been so much water under the bridge, it’s not even about you.
还有那段过去的时光，那段永远不会再回来的时光！
It’s about that moment in time that’s forever gone.
你说了这么多，但你却根本不记得我们做过爱
You say that, but you didn’t even remember having sex, so….
我当然记得
Of course I remembered.
– 你记得？ – 没错！
– You did? – Yes.
– 女人总喜欢这么掩饰自己 – 是吗？
– Women pretend things like that. – They do?
我应该说什么呢？说我记得公园里的红酒…
What was I supposed to say?That I remember the wine in the park…
…说我们我们一起看着星星落下太阳升起！
…and us looking up at the stars fading away as the sun came up?
我们做了两次爱，你这混♥蛋♥！
We had sex twice, you idiot!
好啦，你知道吗，我真得很高兴看到你
All right, you know what,I’m just happy to see you.
即使你已变得易怒和神经质
Even if you’ve become an angry,manic-depressive activist…
我还是很喜欢你，我还是愿意跟你待在一起！
…I still like you,I still enjoy being around you.
我也是，对不起，我不知道怎么了，我只是…
And I feel the same. I’m sorry.I don’t know what happened, I just….
– 我需要发泄，我… – 没事
– I had to let it all out. – Don’t worry about it.
我的感情生活太不顺利了
I’m so miserable in my love life,in my relationship.
所以我总是装作…好像我不在意它
I always act as…Like, you know, I’m detached.
但我真得痛不欲生，因为麻木而痛不欲生
But I’m dying inside.I’m dying because I’m so numb.
我不能感受到伤心和兴奋，我也不会感到苦涩，我只是…
I don’t feel pain or excitement,I’m not even bitter, I’m just….
你以为只有你痛不欲生吗？
You think you’re the one dying inside?
我的生活每时每刻全像是地狱
My life is 24/7 bad.
– 对不起… – 不要…
– I’m sorry. – No, no.
我唯一的快乐就是跟我儿子出去
I mean, the only happiness I get is when I’m out with my son.
我去找了婚姻咨♥询♥
I’ve been to marriage counseling…
我做了我从来没想过我会做的事
…I’ve done things I never thought I would have to do.
我点了蜡烛，买♥♥了自助读物，女性内衣…
I’ve lit candles,bought self-help books, lingerie.
– 蜡烛有用吗？ – 有个鬼用！
– Did the candles help? – Hell, no.
我没法用她想要的方式爱她
I don’t love her the way she needs to be loved…
…我甚至根本看不到我们的未来，但当我看到我的小儿子
…and I don’t even see a future for us,but then I look at my little boy…
…坐在桌子的对面，我就觉得我愿意承受一切折磨…
…sitting across from me,and I think I’d suffer any torture…
…只要能跟他一起度过他生命中的每一刻
…to be with him for all the minutes of his life.
我一刻也不想缺
I don’t want to miss out on one.
但是我的家里没有欢笑，没有快乐
But then, there’s no joy or laughter in my home, you know?
– 我不希望他在这样的环境中长大 – 没有欢笑？那可太糟了
– I don’t want him growing up in that. – No laughter? That’s terrible.
我的父母在一起已经有三十五年了
My parents have been together 35 years…
而即使他们吵架之后，他们还会笑得一样开心
…and even when they fight they end up laughing.
我不想变成那种人，在五十二岁时离了婚…
I don’t want to be one of those people who are getting divorced at 52…
…落着泪，承认从来就没有爱过自己的伴侣…
…and falling down into tears, admitting they never really loved their spouse…
…感觉自己的生活好像完全被吸尘器吸走一样，一片空虚
…and they feel their life has been sucked up into a vacuum cleaner.
我也想拥有美好的生活，我也希望她拥有美好的生活
You know, I want a great life.I want her to have a great life…
这是她应得的！
…she deserves that.
但现在我们只是假装维系着婚姻，责任
But we’re just living in the pretense of a marriage, responsibility…
…过着那种人们觉得你该过的日子
…you know, all these ideas of how people are supposed to live.
然后，我…我做了一个梦
But then I… I have these dreams….
什么梦？
What dreams?
我做了一个梦
I have these dreams,you know, that…
…梦见我站在月台上
…I’m standing on a platform…
…而你不停的坐火车经过
…and you keep going by on a train…
…你就是不停的经过，经过，经过
…and you go by, and you go by,and you go by, you go by.
然后我被吓醒，浑身冷汗
And I wake up with the fucking sweats.
然后我又做了一个梦…
And then I have this other dream…
…梦见你怀孕了，在床上躺在我身边，一♥丝♥不♥挂♥…
…where you’re pregnant in bed beside me naked…
…而我非常非常想要抚摸你，但你跟我说不要，然后你就把头别过去
…and I want so badly to touch you, but you tell me not to and you look away.
然后我…我还是抚摸了你…
And I… And I touch you anyway…
…摸你的脚踝那里，你的皮肤是那样的柔软，使得我在哭泣中醒来