漂亮男孩

but this is… this is a personal matter.
-私事 -对 抱歉
– A personal matter? – Yes. I’m sorry.
-可以吗 -当然了
– Is that okay? – Uh, no, it’s absolutely okay.
我能问一下是关于什么事吗
May I ask what-what this is regarding?
是我儿子的事
Uh, it’s about my son.
好的
Okay.
他一直在摄入各种毒品
He’s been doing all sorts of drugs,
但他现在对冰♥毒♥上瘾
but he’s addicted to crystal meth,
那是毒品里最糟糕的一种
which seems, uh, to be the worst of all of them.
我来这里
And I guess I’m here
是因为我想知道我可以
because I just want to know all that I can
对此做些什么
about all of it.
冰♥毒♥
So, uh, crystal meth, uh,
会让吸食者产生即刻的欣快♥感♥
gives the user a feeling of instant euphoria–
至少在摄入的时候是这样
at least, when he takes it.
但当毒品在体内耗尽时
You know, but when it wears off,
会消耗人体内高达60%的多巴胺
with a depletion of as much as 60% of the dopamine
吸食者就必须加大剂量
the user has to up the doses.
他必须用双倍 三倍的剂量才能有一点感觉
He has to double it, triple it just to feel something,
这会造成更多神经损伤
causing even more nerve damage,
使得吸食者有更强烈的冲动继续吸食
which, uh, increases the compulsion to use.
可怕的恶性循环
Horrible cycle.
在干什么
What’s up?
查点东西
Just doing some research.
你好
Hi.
你饿了吗
Are you hungry?
想吃点东西吗
You want to get something?
大多数男人只会让我给他们口
Most guys just ask me for a blow job.
不 不 我想给你弄点东西吃
Oh, no. No, I’m just offering something to eat.
如果你愿意的话 我们可以聊一会儿
Maybe talk a little, if you’re up to it.
安♥非♥他♥命♥会对大脑造成实质性的伤害
Meth changes the brain physically.
现在我们看到的是摄入冰♥毒♥的人
Here we see the loss of dopamine receptors
大脑中缺失的多巴胺受体
in a meth user’s brain.
我给你看看别的
Now, I’m gonna show you something else here.
看到了吗 这边有两个红色的
Do you see, uh, right here there are these two red, uh…
-很大的斑点 -看到了
– large, red spots right here? – Yeah.
这表明大脑中的杏仁体过度活跃
Okay, what that shows is hyperactivity in the amygdala.
杏仁体是大脑中的一个
And the amygdala is a region of the brain
与焦虑和恐惧有关的区域
that is linked with anxiety and fear.
这里的杏仁体在尖叫
Here the amygdala is screaming.
这告诉我们
What this shows us
从生物学角度出发
is that there is a biological basis,
摄入冰♥毒♥的人可能无法
uh, that meth users may be unable–
不是不愿意 而是无法
not unwilling, but unable–
参与正常的治疗计划
to participate in normal treatment programs.
我也戒过毒
I was in rehab, too.
三次
Three times.
每次最后都逃走了
Ran away every time.
为什么
Why?
那里就是地狱
It was hell.
我想死
Wanted to die.
为什么觉得那里是地狱
Why was it hell?
都整天扯什么上帝的鬼话
All that God shit.
你根本不知道毒品上头的时候
Also, you just don’t know how good it gets
是多美妙的感觉
when it gets good.
很难解释
It’s hard to explain.
感觉像可♥卡♥因♥
Feels like cocaine
但是刺♥激♥程度强一千倍
but multiplied by, like, a thousand.
一百万倍
Or, like, a million.
这对尼克来说意味着什么
What does this mean for Nic?
听着 谢菲先生 我…
Look, Mr. Sheff, I…
我不知道到别人对你承诺过多少希望
I don’t know who promised you what,
但是戒掉冰♥毒♥的成功率是个位数
but the success percentage is in the single digits.
好吧
Okay.
那你父母呢
What about your parents?
他们怎么了
What about them?
你不觉得他们会担心你吗
Don’t you think they’re worried about you?
你不应该
Shouldn’t you…
告诉他们…
let them know that…
他们不在乎
They don’t care.
我觉得他们在乎
Well, I think they do.
你♥他♥妈♥怎么知道
What the fuck do you know?
我走了
I gotta go.
好吧
Oh. Okay.
谢了
Thanks.
老天
God.
我要跟你说克林贡语I’m gonna try some Klingon on you.
出自《星际迷航》
准备好了吗
Ready?
-你知道我说了什么吗 -我可以喝可乐吗
– You know what I said? – May I have a Coca-Cola?
没错
Exactly.
就是这个
That’s it.
我问的就是这个
That’s exactly what I asked.
我可以喝可乐吗
Can I have a Coca-Cola?
好吧 如果你用克林贡语问我
All right. If you ask me in Klingon,
我可能会给你买♥♥一杯
maybe I’ll get you a Coke.
这里一点都没变
This hasn’t changed at all.
这个地方
This place.
你过得怎么样
So, how you doing?
我过得很好
I’m doing great.
就是
You know, just, um…
做些该做的事
just doing what needs to be done.
什么意思
What does that mean?
对自己负责 还有…
Just being responsible for myself and…
我自己在戒毒
I’ve quit on my own, you know, so…
已经五天了
I got five days now.
我感觉很好 只是我
I feel like I’m doing well, but I just need, um…
我需要几百块
I just need a few hundred bucks, though.
尼克 我不能给你钱
Nic, I can’t give you any money.
好
Yeah.
好吧
Okay.
我只要两百块
It’s just 200 bucks. I just need, um…
我得整理整理
I just need to get some shit together.
我想去纽约
I want to go to New York.
-纽约 -对
– New York? – Yeah.
我得离开旧金山
I need to get out of San Francisco.
这里有太多…
There’s too many…
总会给我带来不好的影响
All these fucking bad vibes here all the time.
我只要几百块钱
Yeah, I just need a few hundred bucks.
我们不如吃点午餐一起聊聊
Why don’t we just have lunch and talk?
-这样好吗 -嗯
– We can do that, right? – Mm.
凯伦和孩子们 他们怎么样
How… how’s Karen and, uh… and the kids?
还好 他们一直在问你的事
Okay. They ask about you.
他们下周要升学了 他们肯定很希望你…
It’s their step-up next week, and I know they’d love you…
爸 你又想利用我的负罪感了 对吧
Dad, you’re, uh… you’re guilt-tripping me, all right?
没有 我只是说
No, I’m just saying…
我应该厌恶自己
I should feel horrible about myself.
我知道他们想让你在场而已
I know they wanted you to be there, that’s all.
对不起 爸
I’m sorry, Dad.
我只是想要点钱 行吗
Um… I just need some fucking money, all right?
所以拜托你给我那该死的钱
So please just give me some fucking money.
然后呢 什么时候才是个头
And then what? Where does this end?
这是…我得试一次
This is… I got to see this one through.
现在看来是有效果的
This is kind of working out for me right now.
-我已经五天不吸了 -这看起来
– I got five days sober. – It doesn’t look
不会成功的 尼克
like it’s working out, Nic.
看起来不会成功
Oh, it doesn’t look like it’s working out?
-那然后呢 去治疗 -不
– So what, then, therapy? Huh? – No.
-你可以回家 -不
– You can come home. – No.
-那不… -我们可以的 求你了
– That wouldn’t… – We’ll make it work. Please.
尼克
Nic.
求你了