憨豆先生的大灾难（1997）

Well, Doctor, it’s good to meet you.
博士 很高兴见到你
It’s a complex experience.
真是一次复杂的经验
Enjoy your stay with David.
好好享受和大卫在一起的时光
They’re simple people but warm.
他们很平凡却很热情
David, if I may have just a private word? Okay.
大卫 可否跟你私下谈谈 好
I tell you, why don’t you wait for me back at the new acquisitions?
对了 到新货区那里等我如何
I’ll join you shortly. Yeah.
我马上就来 对
Yes, sir?
先生
He’s a genius, right? Yeah, he’s eccentric, but…
他是天才对吧 对 他有点怪 不过…
Yes. Yeah.
对 对
The unveiling of Whistler’s Mother is the most important thing
为”维瑟勒之母”揭幕 是本美术馆史上
to ever happen to this gallery,
最重要的事
and Dr Bean was your choice.
豆子博士是你选的
Yes, I understand that.
这我懂
Thank you, sir.
谢谢
Dr Bean, when we get home, I wonder…
豆子博士 我在想到家以后…
When we get home, I wonder if you would mind
到家以后 不知道你是否介意
giving me a private moment with my wife.
让我跟我太太独处一阵子
There’s a little something we need to work out.
我们需要解决一点小事
No problem.
没问题
Yeah, I think… Just wait in here would be good.
嗯 我想… 你在这等就好了
Oh, just ignore that. Her mother gave it to us.
噢 别理它 她妈妈给我们的
Huge sentimental value, you know, so…
感情价值很高 所以…
Just make yourself at home.
把这里当自己家
I’ll be just a couple of minutes with Alison.
我跟艾莉森稍微谈谈
Oh, Doctor. I would actually not do that.
噢 博士 我可不会那么做
That’s a limited edition. It’s that it’s delicate, so if you…
那是限♥量♥版本 非常珍贵 所以…
Or, yeah, if… Put it there would be good. Yeah.
或者… 把它放下就好 对
Okay, that’s… All right.
好 那样…很好
Hi. Hi.
嗨 嗨
No Dr Bean?
豆子博士不在
Well, actually, no, he is still here, but let me…
其实他还在 不过就让我…
Jennifer! Kevin! I just want us… I just want us…
珍妮佛 凯文 我只是要我们… 要我们…
Plan B!
B计划
You have luggage packed? What is Plan B?
你行李都打好包了? 什么B计划?
Plan B is,
B计划就是
if you haven’t gotten rid of Dr Bean,
如果你没撵走豆子博士
we go straight to Grandma’s.
我们就直接去住外婆家
I can’t believe you… Screwed up again, huh, Dad?
真不敢相信你竟然… 老爸你又搞砸了
Oh, come on, there was no time to raise the subject!
拜托 现在没时间提这个了
Kevin, start the car, would you, sweetie?
凯文甜心 去发动车子好吗
Oh, Ali, wait a second and look.
艾莉 等一下 听我说
No, you look, David, my darling,
不 你听我说 亲爱的大卫
I have asked very little from you,
我对你的要求向来不多
but I did ask you to get rid of Dr Bean,
但我要你撵走豆子博士
and you have made your choice,
现在你做出不撵他走的决定
so you two can stay here
你们两个就留下来
and really come to grips with postmodernism,
好好研讨后现代主义吧
but I am taking our children to my mother’s.
我要带孩子们去我妈那里
Just give him one last chance.
再给他一次机会嘛
Oh, David… Just one.
噢 大卫… 一次就好
Please?
好吗
Okay. Okay.
好吧
Thank you. All right.
谢谢 好吧
Thanks. Once you get to know him,
谢谢 等你认识他
I think you’re gonna… David, don’t.
相信你就会… 大卫 别说了
Hello, Doctor. Hello.
嗨 博士 嗨
No, no, no, no, Doctor, that’s not for the TV. That’s for the…
不 博士 那不是电视遥控器 那是…
Yeah, well, there they go.
好 就这样走了
Well, Doctor, we’ve got the whole weekend together.
博士 周末就只剩下我们啦
Yeah, get to know each other and…
好好认识彼此
I was thinking tomorrow we might really do LA.
我在想明天可以玩遍洛杉矶
There’s the Gallery of American Indian Art.
有美国印地安人艺术馆
There’s the California State Gallery.
还有加州州立美术馆
There’s actually this new place, the Rabowitz,
还有个叫洛波威兹的新馆
which is kind of the place for abstract expressionism.
展出抽象表现主义作品
Does that sound good to you?
你觉得怎样?
Maybe you have something else in mind?
还是你有其它想法?
Incredible.
了不起
You set?
好了吗
Thank you for taking the Ride of Doom.
感谢您搭乘毁灭帝国之旅
Why don’t you get another ticket? Could be more fun second time round.
怎么不再试一次? 说不定会更好玩
Okay.
好
Brace yourself.
准备罗
He’s a genius, huh?
他是天才?
That’s what they tell me.
他们这么跟我说的
Well, he looks like a fruitcake to me.
我看他根本就是个大草包
Are you willing to take responsibility for his actions?
你愿意为他的行为负责吗
Well, you’re a braver man than me,
你比我还勇敢
and I singlehandedly take on gangs armed with AK47 s.
我单手就能对抗 持有AK47枪♥械♥的混混
Get him out of here. Tell him his is a butt I would dearly love to kick,
带他出去 告诉他 我非常愿意揍他一顿
and the next time, I will.
下次就会动手
Doctor, there is something we have to talk about,
博士 有件事情我们得谈谈
and I don’t quite know how to put this.
我不知道该怎么开口
What I am concerned about is…
我担心的是…
Whoever that is, I am getting rid of them.
不管是谁来 我都要把他赶走
There he is.
他来了
David, sorry we’re late.
大卫 抱歉我们迟到了
The traffic! Oh, terrible Oh, that’s beautiful!
塞车太严重了 噢 太棒了
You couldn’t believe. Every day, it gets worse and worse.
真不敢相信 每天变得愈来愈糟
It’s just the way she. It’s the green. And why? Because nobody’s in control.
她就那样 是绿色的关系 为什么? 因为没人在管
No, it’s the yellow. It’s just. It’s the yellow. She is a…
不 是黄色有问题 是黄色 她实在…
Well, where is Alison?
艾莉森呢?
Well, I’ve got some bad news and some good news.
我有坏消息和好消息
The bad news is that Alison has had to go visit her mum,
坏消息是艾莉森一定要去看她妈
who, well, is not well. That’s too bad.
因为她生病了 太糟了
Gee, the poor thing. Sorry to hear that, David.
天啊 真可怜 大卫 我真遗憾
The good news is that Dr Bean and I will be cooking.
好消息是豆子博士和我要下厨做菜
You sure that’s good news? Well, of course it is.
你确定那是好消息吗 当然啦
All the greatest chefs in the world are men.
世界上最棒的厨子都是男人
So what’s on the menu, maestro?
那都有什么菜呢 大♥师♥
How could I forget?
我怎么会忘掉
What the hell are we going to give them?
我们到底要给他们吃什么
Yes, I think they may be expecting something slightly more formal.
我想他们可能想吃得正式一点
An onion? Just on its own?
洋葱? 就洋葱?
No, no, don’t be ridiculous.
不 少呆了
That’s for Thanksgiving. Alison would kill me.
那是感恩节的菜 艾莉森会杀了我的
No, no, there must be something else.
不 一定还有别的
Have you ever cooked one of these before?
你以前做过这种菜吗?
Oh, yes.
做过
But anyway, it would take like five hours, right?
但无论如何都需要五个小时 对吧
Not necessarily.
也不一定啦
What do you think? Twenty minutes?
你说呢? 二十分钟吗?
I don’t know.
我不知道
You’re sure this is gonna work?
你确定这样可以
Okay, you’re the chef.
好 就听你的
Just put on some vegetables and come and say hello.
炉上放点蔬菜 然后过来打招呼
Maestro!
大♥师♥
My taste buds are positively tingling with anticipation.
我的味蕾正热切期待着美味哦
No. No, thanks.
不 谢了
I think we’ll pass on the appetiser.
我想还是跳过前菜吧
So, Bean, big day Tuesday,
豆子 星期二是大日子
your big day, my big day.
你的大日子 我的大日子
I have a question for you.
我有个问题想问
He’s very attentive to detail.
他非常重视细节
Everything must be just so.
每件事都要做到精确
Bean, I think we need to be honest with each other.
豆子 我想我们该开诚布公地谈
I cannot deny that, over the last days,
我无法否认 过去几天以来
some suspicions have begun to gather in my mind,
我脑中浮现不少疑问
and I would just like to ask you some direct questions,
我只是想直率地问你几个问题