*Hold on*
*Just hold on*
*Sometimes loneliness*
*Is the only rest we get*
*Just hold on, just hold on*
*And the emptiness*
*Actually lets us forget*
*Just hold on, just hold on*
*Sometimes forgiveness*
*Is easiest in secret*
*Just hold on, just hold on*
*So just hold*
*On*
*Whoo*
*Let time be patient*
*You*
*Are still strong*
*Let pain be gracious*
*Love will soon come, baby*
*If you just hold on*
*Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on*
*Just let time be patient*
*Whoo*
*’Cause you’re still strong*
*I’m still strong*
*Just be gracious*
*Love will soon come*
*If you just hold on*
*Mm*
*Just hold on*
*Just be patient*
*Just be patient*
*Just hold on, you*
*Just hold on, you*
*Just hold on, just hold on, just hold on*
谢谢
Thank you.
我听到了 谢谢
I heard you. Thanks.
*You could’ve had it all*
接下来
Coming up next…
*Rolling in the deep*
你在这个阶段结束之时
All the therapy you’ve done, you know
完成了全部疗法
that certainly at this stage
你现在可以掌控一切
that you end up, until you can get it right–
我会告诫在学校里的姑娘
this is what I say to all my girls in school–
你人生中最大的创伤来源于你的父母
that whatever the biggest wound of your life is
你终会接受这段关系
from your parents, that you end up choosing relationships
以弥补创伤
to try to heal those wounds.
是的 -你认为在成长过程中
Yeah. -So what do you think the deep wound
所受的伤
from the past, from you as a little girl
你长大后是否
growing up, you’re trying to heal as you
尝试着修补它们
reach for your relationships as an adult woman?
我父亲的形象在我心目中是缺失的
My dad’s absolute lack of presence and effort with me.
等我大一点
But you know, as I got older,
我明白到是因为酗酒
I definitely understood that it was the alcohol.
我猜他也是无可奈何
It wasn’t a choice that he was necessarily making in himself
他也想支持我
that he didn’t want to step up for me.
但小时候你不懂这些
But when you’re little, you don’t know that.
尤其他不想让我知道他的事 -是的
Especially when he’s like, “I’m drinking juice.” -Yes.
那我也不想你知道我的事
So I’m like, “Well, I drink juice.”
你不懂会产生什么影响
Like, you know, you don’t know the sort of effects of it.
就像你很爱一个人
But yeah, like, when someone that you
如果你越觉得他不爱你
love so much, and the more that you feel like
你会愈加讨好他
they don’t love you, you love them even more…
我试着填补这段空白
Like, I was definitely always trying to fill that void.
同时我在想 反正我最后都会受伤的
But at the same time, I would expect it to hurt at some point.
那我♥干♥脆先伤害他们了
So I would hurt them first.
不是我有意的
You know, not in a malicious way.
是自我防御机制
It wasn’t malicious, it was just like I had
我缺少对别人的信心
absolutely zero expectations of anybody.
因为我父亲
Because I never– I learned
没有给过我信心 -因为你已经失望过很多次
not to have them from my dad. -Because you’d been let down so many times.
是啊 一如既往
Yeah, so by having, you know, zero expectations,
我不会依赖他们
I wouldn’t arrive for them either.
我会把这种情绪转化为动力
Like, you know, and I would feed off this energy
就像…
so they’d be like, well, why would I, like…
我想做得比你好
like, make– go beyond and make that effort with you
因为你见不得我好
when A] you don’t seem to want me to;
而且你也做得不好
and B] you’re not doing it. Like, you know?
绝对是这样的
Um, so it was definitely… definitely that.
然后
And then during the-the, you know,
在最近的几年
the sort of the last two, three years of my life,
我的父亲得了重病
my dad got really sick.
当我离婚后不久
And it was interesting that that…
开始去了解自己
happened during– after, just after having left
尝试搞清楚一些问题的时候
my marriage when I had already made the conscious decision
一件有趣的事情发生了
to get to know myself and figure some things out.
就在没多久之前
And… not-not-not that long ago,
四月份吧
it was, um, back in April.
我父亲去世的时候
When he– when my dad died
我们一起为他守灵
and we had our peace together, I felt that…
然后我感觉心里空掉的一块被填满了
that huge gaping hole fill, like, you know?
真的吗 -我们宽恕了对方
Really? -Just, we-we-we forgave each other.
因为我说了过分的话
‘Cause, you know, I said hurtful things.
虽然不像他那样过分
I did– I did nothing as bad as what he did though,
就是 如果你
to be honest with you. Like, you know, if you add it
把我做过的事情作对比的话
all up throughout my whole life.
正如媒体对他做过的事
But I definitely, like, snapped in the press
进行批判
and stuff like that at him,
那肯定会伤了他的心
which definitely hurt his feelings, of course.
到最后我们不再计较对方了
Um, but we found our peace together.
然后
And then…
你给他播了张专辑
You played the album for him.
对 通过网络电♥话♥
Played the album too, on Zoom, yeah. Yeah.
这个举动治愈了你们吗
Was that healing for both of you?
是的 -你从中学到什么了
Yeah. -What did you learn from that?
我听说他病了 我去看他
When we met up and when I heard he was ill,
我去威尔士看他的时候
um, I went to go and see him in Wales,
给他听了”To Be Love”
and I wanted to play him “To Be Loved.”
我人生目标就是被爱和去爱
My main goal in life is to be loved and love,
所以我想让我父亲明白
you know, and so I wanted to play it to my dad
“你也是我未完成人生目标的原因”
being like, “You’re the reason I haven’t done that yet.”
他绝对是原因
‘Cause he definitely was the reason.
他令我至今还没成为…
He was the reason I haven’t fully accessed what it is
被爱着 与某人相爱的人
to be, like, in a loving, loving relationship with somebody.
就是 无顾虑地爱
Like, 360, like, you know.
他没听过
And he couldn’t.
他说”我只听过’Hometown Glory'”
He was like, “I’ve only ever heard ‘Hometown Glory.'”
我在想 什么 那是我第一首写的歌♥
So I’m like, what? That’s the first song I ever wrote
当时我才16岁
when I was, like, 16.
他说”听其它歌♥太煎熬了”
And he was like, “It’s too painful,” like, you know.
他从没听过其它歌♥ -他不会听的
He’s never heard anything other than “Hometown…” -He would never listen.
他听到我其它歌♥就会关掉
He would switch it off and he never ever
他说的
played any of my other music, he said.
于是我强迫他听
So I forced him to listen
然后我们都哭了
and it’s like we both cried and stuff like that,
他通过我的歌♥真正明白到
and then, um, so that– him sort of really
我孩子正在承受的伤害
understanding my child wound through my song
这结果挺好的
was amazing for me.
他愿意听我唱出来
And again, I think he could listen to me sing it
而不是说出来 这点我们很像
but not say it. Yeah, we’re very similar like that.
我给他播完新专
And then when I played him the album,
接着把”19″
it was just, by then he’d listened to all of 19,
“21””25″整张放完
all of 21,all of 25, and my mum was helping to look
我的母亲一直照顾他到最后
after him towards the end as well.
我们的喜好相同
And his favorites were all of my favorites,
我认为这很好
you know, which I thought was amazing and…
他希望他能完成我未竟的事
he wished that he’d done what I had been doing.
为了我 比如旅行
For myself, you know? Like, the journey.
自己去旅行 -他希望他能做到
Working on himself. Yeah. The journey. -Yeah. He wished he’d done it.
是的 -他为我做的事感到骄傲
Yeah. -Yeah. And he was proud of me for doing it, so it was,
这真的治愈了我
it was very, very healing. But when he died,
他去世时 好像真正地
it was just, it was, it literally, it was…
将我的伤疤缝合了
it was like the wound closed up.
所以我看开了
And I’ve been so open, you know.
你的治疗师不是说
Didn’t your therapist at one point
你需要跟七岁的阿黛儿聊聊吗
say you need to sit with a seven-year-old Adele?
是的 -当你真的这么做
Yeah. -And when you did that, sat with
跟七岁的阿黛儿聊
the seven-year-old Adele…
是的 -你发现了什么

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