改编剧本（2002）

It’s like a brain factory in here.
今早我也有了新点子
I got some ideas too this morning.
他的新点子真的很棒很棒
He got really, really good ones.
你知道 唐诺式的
You know, in a Donald sort of way.
我要加 嘿!什么?
I’m putting… Hey! What?
我要增加一段追逐的戏 杀手…
I’m putting in a chase sequence. So the killer flees on horseback with the girl.
骑马带着女孩逃走 警♥察♥骑摩托车追赶
Cop’s after them on a motorcycle.
就像是机器和马匹的战争
And it’s like a battle between motors and horses.
科技对自然
Like technology versus horse.
那他们也还都是同一个人?
And they’re still all one person, right?
啊呀 那是最大的代价
Well, that’s the big payoff.
听起来很刺♥激♥ -谢了 老兄
It sounds exciting. -Thanks, man.
谢谢 -看吧 我说他一定会喜欢
Thanks. -See, I told you he was gonna like it.
你是我的灵感女神 真的
You’re my muse. You are.
我喜欢当你的缪斯
I love being your muse.
我太高兴了
I’m so happy about that.
我来替考夫曼取件
I’m picking up an order for Kaufman.
薇拉 -嗨 查理
Valerie. -Hi, Charlie.
真巧啊 刚好碰到你
It’s quite a coincidence bumping into you.
抱歉我没有回你电♥话♥ 上礼拜我不在
I’m sorry I didn’t call you back. I was away last week.
没关系 -本来要打的…
That’s okay. -I meant to because
因为情况顺利多了 我想让你知道
things are going well, and I wanted you to know.
那太好了 我很想看些成果
That’s great. I’m anxious to see something.
跟我们坐一下 我正在和苏丝吃饭
You should sit because I’m here with Susan right now.
她好想见见你 碰到你真太巧了
She’s dying to meet you, so it’s funny bumping into you.
来坐一下 -苏丝欧琳也在这里?
Have a seat. -Susan Orlean’s here?
是啊 她正来城里有事 她正在打电♥话♥
Yeah, she’s here in town for a reading or something. She’s just on the phone.
坐一下嘛 她好想见你
Sit down. Have a seat. She’s dying to meet you.
我还是走吧…
Well I should probably go because…
其实我也很想见她
Well, I’d love to meet her too,
但我不想欠她情 而且
but I don’t want to be beholden. And, well…
一旦见过你正在描写的人
Once you meet somebody that you’ve been writing about,
就会失去客观判断…
it becomes very hard to separate. So…
好了 我改天再和你联络 我快写好了
Well, okay, I’ll speak to you soon. And I’m almost done.
就快好了
I’m almost done.
跟苏丝说我很乐意 在以后和她见面
Tell Susan that I would love to meet with her at a future date.
只要她方便 -好吧
As she sees fit. -Okay.
我在骗谁啊? -这又不是在写苏丝欧琳
Who am I kidding? -This isn’t Susan Orlean’s story.
跟她毫无瓜葛 我却不敢见她
I have no connection with her. I can’t even meet her.
除了自乱阵脚和自我憎恨以外
I have no understanding of anything but my own panic,
我啥也不懂…
self-loathing…
还有可悲和小家子气
and pathetic, little existence.
我只够格写我自己 只能写自己
The only thing I’m qualified to write about is myself and my own self…
查理考夫曼上场
We open on Charlie Kaufman.
肥胖的秃老 面目可憎
Fat, old, bald, repulsive,
坐在好莱坞的一家餐厅…
sitting in a Hollywood restaurant
面对着薇拉汤玛丝 端庄美丽的执行制♥作♥
across from Valerie Thomas, a lovely, statuesque film executive.
考夫曼想要争取一件 编剧工作…
Kaufman, trying to get a writing assignment,
黄汗直冒地设法博取她的好感
wanting to impress her, sweats profusely.
秃肥的考夫曼在卧室 气急败坏的踯躅着
Fat, bald Kaufman paces furiously in his bedroom.
对着手提录音机 说道
He speaks into his hand-held tape recorder, and he says,
“查理考夫曼”
“Charlie Kaufman, ”
“肥胖的秃老 面目可憎…”
“fat, bald, repulsive, old,”
“和薇拉汤玛丝 坐在老莱坞一家餐厅”
sits at a Hollywood restaurant with Valerie Thomas.”
考夫曼 貌不登样 滑稽…
Kaufman, repugnant, ridiculous,
对着苏丝的书皮照片 打着手♥枪♥
jerks off to the book jacket photo of Susan Or…
什么事?
What do you want?
我的剧本写好了
I’ve finished my script.
我完工了
I’m done.
可以请你的经纪人看吗?
So would you show it to your agent?
名叫”3″
It’s called The Three.
谢了 也要谢谢你的点子
Thanks. I also want to thank you for your idea.
帮了大忙 我稍微修改了
It was very helpful. I changed it a little.
改成凶手强迫受害人 吃掉从身上切下的肉
Now the killer cuts off body pieces and makes his victims eat them.
凯琳有个蛇的刺青 吞食着自己的尾巴
Caroline has this tattoo of a snake swallowing its own tail, and…
饿伯蛇 -我不懂它的意思
Ouroboros. -I don’t know what that means.
那条蛇 叫做饿伯蛇
The snake. It’s called Ouroboros.
我不知道 但我凶手的”工法”真酷…
Don’t think so. It’s cool for my killer to have this modus operandi.
他强迫那女人吃她自己的肉
When he forces the woman…
而那女人其实是他自己…
who’s him to eat herself
他是在自己咬死自己
he’s eating himself to death.
我疯了
I’m insane.
我是饿伯蛇 -我不懂那个字的意思
I’m Ouroboros. -I don’t know what that word means.
我把自己写进剧本了
I’ve written myself into my screenplay.
那样有点诡异吧?
That’s kind of weird huh?
这是自我放纵 是一种自我陶醉
It’s self-indulgent. It’s narcissistic.
那是唯我论 那是可悲
It’s solipsistic. It’s pathetic.
我真可悲 我又肥又可悲
I’m pathetic. I’m fat and pathetic.
你一定有你的道理 查理 你是艺术家
I’m sure you had good reasons, Charles. You’re an artist.
是因为我太窝囊 不敢面对写那本书的女人
It’s because I’m too timid to speak to the woman who wrote the book.
因为我可悲
Because I’m pathetic.
因为我写不出来 因为我种不出美丽的花
Because I have no idea how to write. I can’t make flowers fascinating.
因为我烂
Because I suck.
嘿 有没有写我啊? -我要去纽约
Hey, am I in the script? -I’m going to New York.
我去见她 我决定了 我必须这样做
I’ll meet her. That’s it. That’s what I have to do.
你可别生气…
Don’t get mad at me for saying,
但这个周末 劳勃正好在纽约办讲习
but Bob’s having a seminar in New York this weekend.
如果你写不下去…
So if you’re stuck…
她说 “老许真是滑稽”
And she said, “Laroche is such a fun character.”
不是盖的 我是滑稽角色
No shit, I’m a fun character.
谁来演我?
Who’s gonna play me?
我得先写完书
Well, I’ve gotta write the book first, John.
然后他们会找人编剧
Then, you know, they get somebody to write the screenplay.
嘿 我觉得应该由我来演自己
Hey, I think I should play me. Ha, ha, ha.
多数人渴望卓越事物
Most people yearn for something exceptional,
渴望心灵的启发…
something so inspiring
愿意为热情牺牲一切 一点都不作做
they’d want to risk everything for that passion, but few would act on it.
是一种强烈的力量…
It was very powerful,
和这种生意昂然的人相处 简直令人陶醉
and it’s intoxicating to be around someone so alive.
跟着我来吧 就在不远
Come on, just follow me. They’re right nearby.
好
Okay.
我可以问个私人问题吗?
Can I ask you a personal question?
放心 我们没有迷路
Look, we’re not lost.
我来过千百次了
I’ve done this a million times.
凡事不顺的时候我就说
When everything is killing me, I just say,
“去它的” 然后继续努力
“Screw it,” and go straight ahead.
噢 糟了…
Oh, fuck…
日晷
Sundial.
我把它竖起来 等上几分锺…
I’ll just set this up, we’ll wait a few minutes,
就可以知道 太阳移♥动♥的方向
and then we’ll be able to tell which way the sun’s moving.
我们应该向东南方走
We should be headed southeast.
你也收集东西吗?
So you collect anything?
也不尽然
Not really, no.
是啊 你知道…
Yeah, well, you know,
其实不是为了收集东西
it’s not really about collecting the thing.
而是想要去完成…
It’s about being able…
就像对计算机 我所喜欢的…
The thing about computers, the thing I like,
是能沉浸其中
is that I’m immersed in them,
而它们没有生命 不会死去或别离
but it’s not like a living thing that’s gonna leave or die or something.
对不起 我只是 -没事
John, I’m sorry. I just… -Okay.
我不是 -嘿 没事
I don’t… -Hey. Okay.
去它的日晷
Fuck the sundial.
我知道怎么走出去 我知道怎么走出去
I know how to get out of here. I know how to get out of here.
这个泥淖 我早就了如指掌
I know this swamp like the back of my goddamn hand.
你和别人一模一样 吸血水蛭
You’re just like everybody else. Fucking leeches.
尽管扒在我身上 吸干我的血 再吐掉
You just attach yourself to me and suck me dry, spit me out.
为什么不去过你自己的日子?
Why don’t you get your own life?
把玩你自己的喜好?
Your own fucking interests?
养尊处优的臭婆娘
Fucking spoiled bitch.
人生似乎充满了 类似鬼兰的事物
Life seemed to be filled with things that were just like the ghost orchid.
美好的憧憬 轻易的产生感情…