录取通知（2006）

再见
Bye!
我们现在干什么？
So what do we do now?
我的朋友，我们现在念大学了
Well，my friend，we’re in college now.
我们想干嘛就干嘛
We can do whatever we want.
真有你的，B
Gotta hand it to you，B.
其他伙计们在教室里受煎熬
Kids everywhere are busting their ass in the classroom,
而我们却在这里杀外星人
and we’re killing aliens，dude.
这比学习好多了 – 我们就是在学习，伙计
This is way better than learning. We are learning here，pal.
我们在学习当外交失败以后 通向文明的代价将会多么惨重
We’re learning the dire cost to civilization when diplomacy fails.
我们正在学习政♥治♥学
We’re learning political science right now.
怎么… 怎么回事？
What the… What the hell is that?
是谁？
Who is it?
阿波纳斯·达尔文·杜兰普，先生
ABERNATHY: Abernathy Darwin Dunlap，sir.
你好！
Hi，there!
你叫什么名字？?
What’s your name?
我叫阿波纳斯·达尔文·杜兰普
My name’s Abernathy Darwin Dunlap.
但你可以叫我A.D.D.
But you could call me A.D.D.,
其实我的确有A.D.D.
on account of the fact that I have A.D.D.,
也就是“注意力涣散失调症”
which is Attention Deficit Disorder and you know,
我六岁的时候，大家以为这只是因为我太爱吃糖了
everyone used to think it was just an addiction to sugar when I was six,
我老妈经常哭，因为她认为我不可能
and my mom used to cry because she thought I would never be,
成为一个有健全社会能力的人
Iike，a fully functioning member of society,
就像我的邻居，他有退役军人综合症
Iike my neighbor who has Legionnaire’s Disease.
哦…
Oh…
这里已经不再是精神病院了
This is no longer a mental health facility.
抱歉帮不上忙
I’m so sorry we can’t help you.
祝你好运，伙计 – 我不需要医院！
Good luck to you，pal. I don’t need a hospital!
好，好吧，那你在这里干嘛？
Okay，okay，wh-wh-what are you doing here，then?
除非我看错网站了
Well，unless I misread the website,
我是来报道的！
I’m here for orientation!
哦，你差点吓着我了，还不止一点点
Oh，you scared me for a second. In more ways than one.
你是在找哈蒙学院
Uh，you’re looking for Harmon College,
就在那个坡下面
it’s just right on up the hill.
祝你好运，过得愉快
But good luck，have fun. Go，Harmon.
不，我是在找南哈蒙理工学院
No! I’m looking for South Harmon lnstitute of Technology
因为只有这所学校收我
because，well，it’s the only place I got accepted
我是来念我的英语语言学位的
and I’m looking to pursue my degree in English
或者法律，或者动物管理 随便什么！
or law or animal husbandry or anything really!
你刚刚说你被这里录取了？
Did you just say you got accepted here?
是的，没错，我们都被录取了
Well，yeah，yeah，yeah，we all did.
什么？
What?
#看看这些孤单的人们
# Look at all the lonely people
非常感谢你
Thank you so much!
# 看看这些孤单的人们
# Look at all the lonely people #
天哪，好大的派对
Oh，God. Holy balls.
我很抱歉
I’m sorry.
BOY: Move，fool.
哦，看，那是我以前的女朋友萨拉·帕尔芬
Oh，look，there’s my old girlfriend，Sara Pelfan.
你伤透了我的心！
You broke my heart!
求你了
Please.
哦，对不起，家长只能送到这里
Oh，uh，sorry，sorry. No parents allowed past this point.
这是咱们学校的规矩
It’s part of our philosophy here at South Harmon.
我们要让你们的孩子独♥立♥
We need to mold your kids into individuals,
第一步就是
and the first step is to
切断家长- 孩子这层关系
sever the ties of the parent-child relationship.
带他走吧
Take him.
我们很高兴拉里能被某个地方收留
We’re just glad Larry got in someplace.
现在我们的麻烦没了
He’s your problem now.
再见，宝贝，别咬人！
Bye，hon. No biting!
嗨，拉里
Hey，Larry.
很高兴见到你，进去吧
Okay，good talk. Go on in there.
你会习惯的，拉里，但愿别
You’re gonna fit right in，Larry. Unfortunately.
我们怎么办？
What are we gonna do?
这本来应该是个秘密
This is supposed to be a secret.
是啊，我看已经被揭穿了
Yeah，well，I guess the secret’s out.
你去查查看邮箱到底怎么回事 我去找施瑞德，好吗？
You go check the P.O. box，I’m gonna go find Schrader，okay?
嘿，会员朋友，欢迎来到B.K.E.之家
Hey，pledge guy，welcome to B.K.E. House.
我能为你拿一下西装吗？
Can I take your blazer for you?
进去吧，你的未来就在前方
Get in there，your future is right in there.
谢谢你 – 不用客气
Thank you. All right.
哦，该死
BARTLEBY: Oh，shit.
哦，老天 我真的很抱歉
GlRL: Oh，my gosh. I’m so sorry. Sorry.
巴特比，你好吗？ 嗨，你好
Bartleby. Hey，how are you? Hey，how you doing?
真对不起，把你的外套♥弄♥脏了
Good. I’m so sorry about your jacket.
别担心，这…这不是我的衣服
Dude，don’t worry about it. It’s– It’s not even my jacket.
太好了，那么，你怎么会在这里？
Perfect. So，what are you doing here?
我在找施瑞德，你有没有看见他？
I’m，I’m looking for Schrader，actually. Have you seen him?
呃，没有
Uh，no，I haven’t.
嗨，我是谢尔曼·施瑞德.
Hey，I’m Sherman Schrader.
待会儿见
I’ll catch up with you.
嗨
Hey.
我是谢尔曼·施瑞德 好吧
I’m Sherman Schrader. Okay.
太有意思了，我在一旁看你们
This is fun. I’m just gonna hang back
打桌球吧
while you guys shoot around and stuff，you know.
哦，该死
Oh，shit.
我来处理
I got it.
哦，这是，呃，这是G号♥杆
Oh. That’s a.. It’s a G chord.
我曾经才卡百利桌球队呆过
I used to play in a Cranberries tribute band.
呃，后来解散了
Uh，we disbanded.
嗨！你是谢尔曼·施瑞德 是的
Hey，you’re Sherman Schrader. Yeah.
霍伊特·安布罗斯 – 没错，我知道
Hoyt Ambrose. Yes，right. I know.
对，你是男生联谊会的主席
Yes. You are the president of this whole fraternity.
没错 – 你和莫妮卡·摩兰德交往
That’s right. Right. You date Monica Moreland.
的确如此 – 对
That I do. Right.
我打手♥枪♥的时候会想她
I think about her when I masturbate.
什么？ – 什么？
What? What?
我不是故意说的
I didn’t mean to say that.
呃，谢尔曼的父亲和我父亲以前就是联谊会的会友
Yeah. So，uh，Sherman’s father pledged alongside my father back in the day.
哦，你是世袭家里的传统
Oh，so you’re the legacy.
没错，传统！
That’s right. Legacy!
你可能…你打球的时候可能需要这个
You need… You probably need this to play，actually.
原来在这里吗？
Was it here?
呃，还是在这里？那里？
Uh，was it there? Was it…
那你现在在这里念书吗？还是…
So–So do you go to school here now，or…
哦，不是 我在南哈蒙念书
I don’t. Uh，I go to South Harmon.
你说南哈蒙?
Did you say South Harmon?
是的
Yes，I did.
哦，那是什么学校？ – 呃…
Oh，what’s that? Hmm?
南哈蒙是什么学校？
Wha-What’s South Harmon?
南哈蒙是…是一所大学
South Harmon is… It’s a college,
规模比较小的大学，非常，非常小
just a very small college. Teeny，tiny college.
那太棒了，祝贺你 – 谢谢
That’s great. Well，congratulations to you. Thank you.
嗨，宝贝 – 嗨
Hey，sweetie. Hey!
哦，天哪，我真高兴…
Oh，my gosh，I was so excited for you…
给我一分钟时间，好吗？谢谢
Actually，can you just give me just one sec，okay? Thanks.
嗨，老兄，我是霍伊特·安布罗斯
Hey，winner，Hoyt Ambrose.
弗洛伊德·潘布罗斯
Floyd Pambrose.
太奇怪了，我们的名字很押韵
That’s weird. Our names rhyme.
是啊，这奇怪
Yeah，that is pretty weird.
真有趣，欢迎到B.K.E.
That’s kind of crazy. Welcome to B.K.E.
多谢.这不错，我喜欢这
Thanks. It’s great. I love it here.
压抑的异性关系 – 噢
All the sexually repressed energy. Oh.
我喜欢这，很多秘密的反犹太主义 你也知道
I love it. A lot of anti-Semitism，but under the rug，you know.
我喜欢你的处事方式
I like it，I like the way you handle your business.
谢谢，非常感谢
Thanks. Thanks a lot.
好了，为什么不到处走走认识下新朋友
Well，hey，why don’t you just hang around and meet some guys?
不了，谢谢 我们不一样
Oh，no，thanks，man，I’m not into guys.
我完全尊重你的生活选择 好运
I totally respect your lifestyle choice，though. And good luck with it.
你父母也许不同意 但我会
Your parents probably don’t get it，but I do.
下次见，莫妮卡 – 很高兴见到你
I’ll see you later，Monica. Bye. It was good to see you.
再见，托尔 还是德克？