林中漫步（2015）

作为暖场礼物
As an ice-breaker.
你要在餐馆里给她这个 ?
You’re gonna give those to her in a restaurant?
是啊
Yeah.
除非你觉得这个主意很糟
Unless you think it’s a bad idea.
不 我觉得这个主意好极了
No. I think that’s a great idea.
很好
Good.
嘿
Hey.
– 你点了火鸡 对吧? – 是的
-You had the turkey, right? – Yes.
– 请享用 – 好的
-Enjoy. – All right.
我么走 我们走
We go. We go.
– 你在说什么? – 有个家伙在找我
-What are you talking about? -There’s some guy looking for me!
什么家伙?
Some guy?
比乌拉的丈夫
Beulah’s husband.
– 比乌拉有丈夫? – 是的
-Beulah’s got a husband? -Yeah.
整个地球上只有两个人
I mean, there’s only two guys
会和她上♥床♥
on the planet that would go to bed with ner,
而我俩就在这同一个镇上!
and here we are in the same damned town!
所以发生什么事了?
So what happened?
我按计划去了消防站前面
I’m standing in front of the fire station like we planned.
是的
Yeah.
然后从角落里
And then around the corner
冲出了一辆红色皮卡 然后一个急停
comes this red pickup and it screeches to a halt.
然后出来了一个 怒气冲冲的大家伙
And this big guy, he’s angry, he gets out,
他朝我走来 然后像这样
and he’s walking up towards me, and he’s going like this.
“我想和你聊聊”
“L want to talk to you.”
– 那你怎么做的 ? – 我跑了
-So what did you do? -I ran.
你跑了?
You ran?
嗯 如果有必要的话我速度还是很快的
Yeah. I can move like ajack-rabbit if I have to.
– 他没抓到你 ? – 没有 他可得有600磅
-So he didn’t catch you? -No, no. He’s 600 pounds.
他可不算什么运动健将
He’s not exactly a track star.
他现在正开着他的红色皮卡四处找我呢
He’s cruising around now in his red pickup truck looking for me.
我跑过了后院
I been running through back yards,
晾衣绳 穿过各种东西
clothes lines, all sorts of shit.
– 好吧 你现在安全了 – 这个家伙…
-Well, you’re safe now. -This guy is…
红色皮卡!
Red pickup!
不是那一辆!
And there’s another one!
拜托 布赖森 我们需要一个计划!
Come on, Bryson, we need a plan!
你为什么不出去和那个家伙谈谈
Why don’t you go out and talk to the guy,
他肯定讲道理的
huh? I’m sure he’s reasonable.
这就是你的计划?
That’s your plan?
我不需要计划 我又没有被追着跑
I don’t need a plan. I’m not being chased.
快 拜托 布赖森 我们得赶紧走了
Now, come on, Bryson, we gotta get outta here.
– 是啊 – 拜托 别跟我胡闹
-Yeah. -Come on, don’t mess around with me.
求你了?
Please?
– 快点! – 好 好
-Come on! -Yeah, yeah.
嘿 伙计 你在里面吗 ?
Hey buddy, you in there?
我是布巴·T·褔鲁巴 你在里面吗?
It’s Bubba T. Flubbal Are you in there,
伙计 ? 出来 你个懦夫 !
boy? Come out, you chicken shit!
拜托!别跟我胡闹!
Come on! Don’t mess around!
开门!
Open up!
我知道你在里面 你个狗♥娘♥养♥的!
I know you’re in there, you son of a bitch!
我♥操♥
Holy shit.
他来了!
He’s here!
我不管你在哪里
I don’t care where the hell you are,
我会把这里的每一扇门都撞开!
I’ll knock every one of these damned doors down!
快出来 我知道你就在这附近 你个狗♥娘♥养♥的！
Come on, I know you’re in here somewhere, you son of a bitch!
不管你在哪里 我都会找到你的!
I don’t care where you are, I’m gonna find you!
我倒要看看是谁在和我的比乌拉乱搞!
I want to know who’s been messing with my Beulah!
– 赶紧给我出来! – 拜托 布赖森!
-Bring your ass out here! -Come on, Bryson!
拉我一把!他就在门口了!
Pull me through! He’s at the door!
快他妈开门!
Open the goddamned door!
快点 快走!快走!
Come on, move it! Move it!
还记得巴塞尔吗?当我们偷了船之后?
But what about Basel? When we stole the boat?
我们没有偷船 我们只是借用一下
We didn’t steal the boat, we borrowed the boat.
是啊 但她那个拿着猎枪的叔叔
Yes, well, the girl’s uncle
可不这么认为
with the shotgun, he saw it differently.
他当然不这么认为
He sure did.
你知道吗 你错过了希腊
You know, you missed out in Greece.
那时候我感觉已经看够了
rd kind of had my fill by that point.
当你说你要去英格兰的时候 我以为你最多
When you said you were gonna go to England, I thought you’d last,
只会呆一星期
one week. Tops.
– 好吧 我遇见了盖尔 – 是啊
-Well, I meta gal. -Yeah.
就是这么回事
And that was that.
好吧…谢谢
Well… Yeah, thank you.
凯茜确实是个好姑娘 但很显然你肯定还有过其他女人
Cathy seems great. But obviously you’ve been with other women.
从没有过?
Never?
在过去的40年里 ?
In the last 40 years?
没有
Nope.
扯淡 你个混♥蛋♥
Bullshit, you son of a bitch.
我看见你在星期天就和老板娘勾搭了6次
I saw you undress that proprietress six ways to Sunday.
– 你别告诉我你没有 – 好吧…
-You can’t tell me you didn’t. -Well…
这些年就这么一个女人?
One woman all these years?
是的
Yep.
这对你来说可不好
That can’t be good for you.
你上一次…是什么时候
I mean, when was the last time that you even got a, uh…
好吧 无所谓了 我知道结了婚的女人是什么样子
Well, never mind. I know how married women are.
真的 ? 是么 ?
Really? Is that so?
是啊 相信我 我相处过的
Yeah. Trust me. I’ve been
已婚妇女可比你多得多
with way more married women than you have.
嘿 卡茨 你醒着吗 ?
Hey, Katz, you awake?
没有
-katzz no.
什么声音 ?
What was that?
我怎么知道?
How the hell should I know?
听起来是个大家伙
It sounded big.
森林里任何声音都像大家伙 布赖森
Everything sounds big in the woods, Bryson.
有可能只是臭鼬罢了 睡觉吧
It’s probably just a skunk. Go to bed.
你包里有刀吗?
Did you pack a knife?
没有
No.
锋利的东西呢?
Nothing sharp?
指甲钳
Nail clippers.
该死
Swell.
别管它了 布赖森 它会自己走掉的
Just leave it alone, Bryson. It will go away.
是吗 如果是头熊正在向你走来
Oh, yeah, well if it is a bear and it comes toward you,
那你怎么办? 给它修修脚?
what are you going to do? Give it a pedicure?
我的天 两头大野熊正看着我呢
Jesus! Two fucking bears staring right at me.
见鬼 布莱森 赶紧睡觉行么
Oh, god dammit, Bryson, get some sleep.
我♥操♥
Holy shit.
如果它们过来了 就装死
If they come for us, play dead.
如果它们过来了 我们就真死了
If they come for us, we are dead.
不 等等 等等 等等
No, wait, wait, wait.
那是灰熊 等等
That’s grizzlies. Wait a minute.
见鬼 它们把所有东西都撕烂了
IVIotherfuck They’re tearing everything apart.
好了 “尽可能站高一点吓退灰熊”
Okay. “Stand up as tall as you can to intimidate the bear.”
吓退灰熊? 它们可是熊啊!
Intimidate the bear? They’re fucking bears!
我们得把它们吓走
We’ve got to scare them off.
走开!滚开!
Get! Scat!
你得把这一段写进书里
You gotta put this in the book.
– 我他妈没有在写书 – 哦
-There’s not going to be a goddamned book. -Oh.
见鬼 该死
Jeez_ Damn.
拜托 这不是玩得很开心么
Come on, we’re having fun.
真见鬼
Holy shit.
– 看这个 – 什么?
-Look at this. -What?
这就是路线
This is the trail.
我们在这里 一半还没到
Here we are. We’re not even halfway there.
– 这不可能 – 混♥蛋♥
-This can’t be right. -Son of a bitch.
比例尺有问题
No way that’s to scale.
上面说的是 “按比例绘制的地图”
It says, “Map to Scale”.
够了 新计划
That’s it. New plan.
真见鬼
God damn it.
我给你说 布赖森 世界上有很多种冒险
I’m telling you, Bryson, there’s a lot of advantages.