憨豆先生的大灾难（1997）

I suppose we could just fire him.
我想我们干脆开除他
Of course, we’ll have to give him three months’ notice.
当然 我们得给他三个月的通知
Stuff and nonsense. Leave it to me.
少胡扯了 这事让我来办
I’ll talk to the chairman and insist on Mr Bean’s immediate dismissal.
我去跟馆长谈 要他立刻开除豆子先生
Now, then, back to the agenda.
下一个提案
The Grierson Gallery of California
加州的格利森美术馆
has recently received a private donation of $50 million
收到一笔五千万美金的私人捐款
to spend on buying Whistler’s portrait of his mother
要用来向巴黎的奥塞美术馆
from the Musee d’Orsay in Paris.
收♥购♥维瑟勒画的母亲画像
It is quite simply the most historic purchase made by an American gallery this century.
这是本世纪美国人最具历史价值的一次收♥购♥行动
It’s as simple as this.
就这么简单
The greatest painting ever by an American artist
美籍画家所绘史上最伟大的作品
is returning at last to America.
终于要回到美国了
From now on, Whistler’s Mother lives right here in Los Angeles,
从现在起”维瑟勒之母”将留在洛杉矶
where she belongs.
这幅画本就属于这里
When will we actually see her?
我们何时能见到这幅画
The unveiling will be in about two weeks, and you’re all invited.
揭幕仪式约在二周后举♥行♥ 各位都受到邀请
They’ve asked us to send a scholar of great weight and substance
他们要我们派一位重量级的学者
to preside over the ceremony and…
来主持仪式
stay on for a couple of months of lectures and seminars.
并且待上几个月 开设课程和研讨会
Dr Rosenblum,
罗森布鲁博士
Dr Cutler,
卡特勒博士
you both hold high claim on this great honour.
你们两位都有资格获选
The chairman is here, sir.
先生 馆长来了
Excellent, send him in.
太好了 叫他进来
Oh, and run and fetch Mr Bean, will you?
去叫豆子先生过来好吗?
We’re about to fire him.
我们要开除他
Marvellous.
太好了
Yes, Mr Bean is the worst employee in the gallery’s history.
对 豆子先生是本美术馆史上最烂的员工
Good afternoon, sir.
先生 你好
Sit down. Sit down.
就坐吧 请坐
Now, before we move on to the major business of the day,
在谈到今天的重要事项前
I should like to broach the question of Mr Bean.
我有个有关豆子先生的问题想请教您
Now, Mr Bean has worked for us for many years.
豆子先生已替我们服务多年
And will for many years to come.
将来也还会继续服务
I employed this splendid young man when I was doing your job, Charles,
查理 我在你这位置时就雇用了这位出色的年轻人
and you can have my resignation if you go anywhere near him.
如果你敢威胁他 我就辞职
He’s a fine young fellow.
他是个好青年
Absolutely. Quite right.
没错 完全正确
Very well, moving on.
很好 那继续
The Grierson Gallery of California
加州的格利森美术馆
needs a representative of our great gallery.
需要我们伟大的画廊派一位代表
They’re looking for a scholar of a very high standing.
他们要找一位地位崇高的学者
I have therefore decided to recommend for the post,
我因此决定推荐此职
and the threemonth sabbatical that goes with it,
以及附带的三个月假期
that splendid employee,
给这位出色的员工
Mr Bean.
豆子先生
All those in favour?
同意的举手
Yes!
好
Excellent. Carried.
太好了 都同意
Our loss is America’s gain.
我们的损失是美国的收获
David,
大卫
got a letter from the Royal National Gallery.
我收到皇家美术馆的来信
They’re recommending a guy called Bean to represent them.
他们要推荐一个叫豆子的人当代表
Bean?
豆子
I can’t say I’ve heard of him.
没听过这号♥人物
Well, the letter’s signed by Drs Rosenblum and Cutler.
这封信是由 罗森布鲁和卡特勒博士 联名签署的
Well, that’s impressive. They say,
真了不起 他们说
“He’s a man whose incontrovertible genius dwarfs our own meagre talents.”
“他无庸置疑的天赋 使我们微不足道的才能显得渺小”
Rosen blum and Cutler said that?
罗森布鲁和卡特勒这样说吗
Well, you asked for England’s top man.
你要英国的顶尖人物
I do believe I delivered him.
我相信我已经完成任务了
He certainly sounds like it.
他听来绝对像是那号♥人物
However, before we confirm,
不过在确定之前 我们的波妮丝
Bernice here still feels that we’d get more media attention
仍认为若能从娱乐界找个人来
if we had someone from, let’s say, the entertainment industry.
就会博得更多媒体注意
I genuinely believe that we could get Jon Bon Jovi.
我真心相信可以找乔恩·邦·乔飞来
Jon Bon Jovi?
乔恩·邦·乔飞
To unveil Whistler’s Mother? Yes.
来为”维瑟勒之母”揭幕 对
I’ve nothing against Jon Bon Jovi.
我倒不是反对乔恩·邦·乔飞
The man has had two great hairstyles in the last 10 years,
他过去十年内出现两次漂亮发型
which is an achievement not to be sniffed at,
这已是不容小觑的成就了
but so far as I know,
但就我所知
Mr Jovi knows absolutely nothing about 19thcentury Impressionism.
乔飞先生对十九世纪印象派画作 一窍不通
He certainly hasn’t mentioned it in any of his recent songs.
他最近的歌♥曲里也完全没提
No, but David… This is not a rock video.
可是大卫… 这又不是摇滚乐电视节目
This is a great and serious work of art,
这是伟大而严肃的艺术作品
and Dr Bean will give the occasion depth and dignity.
豆子先生会让该场合增加深度和尊严
You’re right. We go with Bean. George…
你说的没错 我们就用豆子先生 乔治…
No, no, no, no, David’s our curator.
不不不 大卫是我们评议员
This is David’s call. It’s his decision, his responsibility,
应该由大卫来说 这是他的决定 他的责任
ultimately, his neck.
如果要砍也是砍他的头
And where do you want him to stay?
你要他住哪里?
I have a rather interesting idea.
我有个妙主意
Here?
这里
In our house for two months?
在我们家住两个月
David, what, suddenly there’s no hotels in Los Angeles?
怎么 洛杉矶突然没旅馆了吗?
Okay, there’s no need to get excited here. I just thought, you know,
喂 不要那么紧张 我只是想
this is the Royal National Gallery of England’s top man.
他是英国皇家美术馆的顶尖人物
I thought he’d be very exciting to have around,
我想有他相伴一定很有趣
to learn from and talk to and…
可以向他学习 聊天 还有…
So do we know anything about our new best friend?
这位新来的好朋友 我们对他知道多少
No, but I think they might have mentioned it if he was a notorious serial killer.
如果他是恶名昭彰的连环杀手 他们一定会提
Are you feeling lucky, punk?
庞克 你觉得走运吗
David, you know, we have an expression in this country.
大卫 我们国家有句俗谚
It says, “Over my dead body.” Ali.
就是”死也不准” 艾莉
I’d like to put it on the table right here and now.
我此时此刻就要这么说
This is a onceinalifetime opportunity, and it could be seriously great for the kids.
这次良机难逢 对孩子们绝对是好事
You’re kidding. Come on, it’s gonna be great!
开什么玩笑 拜托 会很愉快的啦
Let’s say there is a chart
假设这里有张表
of the most intelligent people you’ve ever met in your life.
上面是你这辈子遇过最聪明的人
Well, at number one with a bullet is Dr Bean.
那么占首位的无庸置疑是豆子先生
Kevin, you know how sometimes you ask me questions that I can’t answer?
凯文 记得你有时候会问我一些无法回答的问题吗
Like, “What is an intrauterine device?”
就像”子♥宫♥圈是什么”
Well, I think more like, “What’s the meaning of life?”
我比较常思考”生命有何意义”
I never asked you that. That’s fine. It doesn’t matter.
这我可从没问过 随便啦
What I am saying here is that Dr Bean is a very remarkable man.
我只是说豆子先生是非常杰出的人
Hey, for all you know, he could be very cute.
更何况他说不定很可爱呢
Oh, come on, the guy is gonna be a creep.
拜托 他绝对会是怪咖
All Englishmen are ugly.
所有英国人都是丑八怪
I just look at Prince Charles and weep.
我光看查理王子就想哭
Okay, so he’s gonna look like Meat Loaf’s butt.
好 所以他看来像肉块先生的屁♥股♥
Yeah, and that’s if we get lucky.
对 那样还算我们走运
Jennifer, no one is asking you to marry him.
珍妮佛 又没有人要你嫁给他
You know, I don’t know why we have these family conferences
我不知道我们干嘛开家庭会议
if Dad’s already made up his mind.
老爸根本就已做了决定
Perceptive child. Hey, what’s wrong with Meat Loaf’s butt?
善解人意的孩子 肉块的屁♥股♥又怎样
Oh, come on, everybody, it’s gonna be great!
好了啦 会很好玩的
Dr Bean is a genius of the very highest order.
豆子先生是最超级的天才
Good evening.
晚安
No, sir, you’re in fact in first class.
不 先生 您是坐头等舱的
Good evening.
晚安
Good evening, sir. May I take your coat?
晚安 先生 我替你拿外套好吗
Thank you.
谢谢
Good. Simple poster, nice and big.
好 简单的海报 又漂亮又大
It’s actual size. A bargain at $9.99.
这是实际尺寸 特♥价♥9.99美金
Spencer? Yes, sir.
史宝瑟? 是 先生
Bath towel.
浴巾
Yeah, pushing your luck a little here, Walter.
华特 你有点过了
It’ll sell.
会大卖♥♥的