Phoebe: Hey, you can do this. It’s just like pulling off a Band-aid. Okay, just do it really fast, and then the wound is exposed. Go! Go!
嘿，你能做到的。就像撕掉创可贴一样。只要快速一扯，然后伤口就露出来了。快去！快去！
Chandler: Janice. Hi, Janice. Okay, here we go. I don’t think we should go out anymore. Janice.
珍妮丝，嗨，珍妮丝。好吧，我说了，我想我们不该再交往下去了。珍妮丝。
Janice: All right. Well, there you go. Stop it, stop it, stop it.
好吧。我懂了…别，别，别….
Chandler: This isn’t about you.
这和你无关。
Janice: I know! This is not about me. This is totally about your fear of commitment.
我知道，这和我无关。这完全是因为你害怕承诺。
Chandler: I’m not afraid of commitment. I don’t have a fear commitment.
我一点也不怕承诺。我一点也不怕承诺。
Janice: Oh, please.
哦，得了吧。
Chandler: I don’t!
我不怕。
Janice: Oh, please.
哦，得了吧。
Chandler: I don’t! I’m ready to commit anytime.
我不怕！我准备好了随时都可以奉献承诺。
Janice: Really?
真的吗？
Rachel: Okay, I know this is gonna sound really stupid, …but I feel, I feel that if I can do this…You know, if I can actually do my own laundry…there isn’t anything I can’t do.
好，我知道这听起来很傻……但是我觉得如果我可以做这个…我想如果我可以自己洗衣服的话…我就没有办不到的事。
Ross: That does not sound stupid to me. The first time I had to make dinner for myself after Carol left me. I’m sorry, that’s all the time we have. Next on Ross….
我不觉得很傻。卡萝离开我之后我不得不第一次自己做晚饭。抱歉，时间到。接下来到我……
Ross: Uhoh.
啊哦。
Rachel: What uhoh?
怎么了？
Ross: Uhoh…. Uhoh, the laundry’s done.
啊哦……啊哦，衣服洗好了。
It’s a song. The laundry song that we sing. Uhoh! The laundry’s done.
这是一首歌。我们唱的一首洗衣歌。啊哦，衣服洗好了。
Ross: Uhoh!
啊哦！
Rachel: Ross, what’s the matter?
Ross， 到底怎么了？
Ross: Nothing, nothing. Leelo, the laundry’s done.
没事，没事。哩咯，衣服洗好咯。
Ross: All right, all right, it’s just that you left a red sock in with all your whites, and now, everything’s kinda pink.
好吧好吧，就是你掉了一只红色的短袜在白衣服堆里，现在所有的衣服都变成粉色了。
Rachel: Oh, everything’s pink?
哦，所有的衣服都变成粉色了？
Ross: Yeah, uh, except for the red sock, which is still red. I’m sorry, please don’t be upset, it could happen to anyone.
对，呃，除了那只红色的短袜，还是红色的。可怜，别难过，任何人都会发生这种事。
Rachel: Oh, but it didn’t. It happened to me. God, I’m gonna look like a big Marshmallow Peep! What am I doing? What am I doing? My father’s right! I can’t live on my own. I can’t even do laundry!
注释：marshmallow peep：一种一般在复活节吃的彩色糖果。
才不是呢，就我才会发生这种事。天呐， 我穿这些看来会像只巨大的复活节糖果！我在做什么啊？我在做什么啊？我爸说得对，我无法独立生活。我连洗衣服都不会。
Monica: Something went wrong with Underdog, and they couldn’t get his head to inflate. So anyway…um…his head is flopping down Broadway, right? And I’m just thinking…how inappropriate this is. Um, Okay, I’ve got something in my eye, uh, Joey, could we check it in the light, please? Oh, my God!
注释：flop：（笨拙地、不由自主地或松弛地）移动或落下。
超人狗气球出了点问题，它的头没办法充气鼓起来。所以……嗯……它的头好像快掉到百老汇大街上一样，然后我心想……实在太不像话了。恩，我眼睛进东西了，哦，乔伊，我们到灯光下看一下，好吗？我的天呀！
Joey: What?
怎么啦？
Monica: Hello! Were we at the same table? It’s like…cocktails in Appalachia.
注释：cocktails in Appalachia：Appalachia是美国东部的山区，比较保守，在那里出现鸡尾酒就像就像乱♥伦一样了，莫妮卡只是有点夸张的比喻那“兄妹”的行为。
喂！我们是坐在一桌吗？看起来就像……在阿巴拉契亚喝鸡尾酒一样。
Joey: Come on. They’re close.
算啦，他们感情很好。
Monica: Close? She’s got her tongue’s in his ear.
感情很好？她舌头都伸进了他耳朵里了。
Joey: Oh, like you’ve never gotten a little rambunctious with Ross.
注释：rambunctious：粗犷的，粗暴的。
哦，好像你就从来不对罗斯做点粗犷的小动作似的。
Monica: Joey, this is sick, it’s disgusting, it’s, it’s… not really true, is it?
乔伊，这太变态了，太恶心了，太……这不是真的，对不对？
Joey: Well, who’s to say what’s true? I mean…
好吧，谁说是真的？我是说……
Monica: Oh my god, what were you thinking?
哦，我的天，你在想些什么啊？
Joey: All right, look, l’m not proud of this, Okay? Well, maybe I am a little.
好吧，我也不想这样的，好吗？嗯，可能有一点。
Monica: l’m out of here!
我要走了。
Joey: Wait! Wait! Wait! Come on! You like him. I want her. He likes you.
等等，等等，等等！好啦！你喜欢他，我想要她，他喜欢你。
Monica: Really?
真的？
Joey: Yeah. Listen, I’m thinking, if we put our heads together, between the two of us……we can break them up.
是啊。听着，我想，就我们两个知道哈，如果我们一起想办法……就能拆散他们。
Monica: I’m so sorry. I can’t believe I did this. I just couldn’t stop laughing at your Norman Mailer story.
真是抱歉，没想到我会这样。你那个诺曼·梅勒的故事让我都笑喷了。
Joey: Uh, waiter, one more plate of chicken wings over here.
呃，服务生，这边再来一盘鸡翅。
Chandler: Here’s the thing, Janice. You know, I mean, it’s like we’re different. You know, I’m like the bing, bing, bing. You’re like the boom, boom, boom. Oh, my God! I’m so sorry! Are you okay?
事情是这样的，珍妮丝。要知道，我的意思是，好像我们不是一类人。你懂的，我就像乒，乒，乒，你就像乓、乓、乓。天呐，太对不起了，你没事吧？
Janice: Ow. Um, it’s just my lens. It’s just my lens. I’ll be right… I’ll be right back. OW…
噢，嗯，只是我的隐形眼镜，只是我的隐形眼镜。我马上……我马上回来。哎呦……
Chandler: I hit her in the eye! I hit her in the eye! This is the worst breakup in the history of the world.
我打到她的眼睛了！我打到她的眼睛了！这是有史以来最差劲的分手了。
Phoebe: Oh my god. Hey, how many of those have you had?
哦，我的天。你已经喝了多少杯了？
Chandler: Oh, I don’t know, a million?
哦，我不知道，一百万杯？
Phoebe: Chandler, easy, easy. Go to your happy place. La la la la la la la.
钱德勒，放松，放松。想点高兴的事。啦啦啦啦。
Chandler: I’m fine, I’m fine.
我没事的。
Phoebe: All right.
好吧。
Chandler: I’m not fine. Here she comes.
不妙，她回来了。
Phoebe: Wait here, Okay? Breathe.
在这儿等着。深呼吸。
Chandler: How do you do that?
你是怎么办到的？
Phoebe: It’s like a gift.
天生的。
Chandler: We should always always break up together.
我们应该回♥回分手都一起。
Phoebe: Oh, I’d like that.
哦，乐意之极。
Ross: You got the clothes clean. Now that’s the important part.
你把衣服洗干净了，这才是重点。
Rachel: Oh, I guess. Except everything looks like jammies now. Whoa, I’m sorry. Excuse me. We had this cart.
注释：jammies：睡衣裤。
哦，我想是吧。只是现在每件衣服都像睡衣一样了。哇，对不起，抱歉，这推车是我们的。
Woman: Yeah, well, I had a 24inch waist. You lose things. Now, come on. Get out of my way.
好吧，我的腰围也曾是24寸。但你总会失去些东西。让开，别挡道。
Rachel: I’m sorry, you know, maybe I wasn’t being clear. Uh, this is our cart.
抱歉，可能我说得不够清楚。呃，这是我们的推车。
Woman: Hey, hey, hey, there weren’t any clothes in it!
嗨，嗨，嗨，里面都没有衣服。
Rachel: Hey, hey, hey, hey, quit making up rules!
嗨，嗨，嗨，嗨，别再乱编规矩了！
Woman: Let go! Come on, it’s my cart. –
放手，车是我的。
Rachel: All right, all right, listen, Missy. If you want this cart, you’re gonna have to take me with it!
好吧，好吧，听着，女士。如果你想要这辆推车，就必须把我一起推走！
Rachel: Yes! Did you see that?
太好了，你看见没？
Ross: You were incredible! A brand new woman, ladies and gentlemen. I could not have done this without you.
你太棒了！女士们先生们，一位脱胎换骨的新女性诞生了。没有你我做不到。
Ross: Okay, um, uh, more clothes in the dryer? I’m fine. I’m fine.
好，恩，呃，干衣机里还有衣服吗？我没事，我没事。
Rachel: Are you sure you’re okay?
你确定你没事？
Ross: Yeah.
是的。
Rachel: Does it still hurt?
还疼吗？
Ross: Yeah.
是的。
Phoebe: What a neat idea. All your clothes match. I’m gonna do this.
这方法真好，你现在衣服颜色都一个色系，回头我也这么干。
Monica: Hi!
嗨。
Phoebe: Hey, how’d it go?
嘿，怎么样啦？
Joey: Excellent!
太棒了！
Monica: We ripped that couple apart, and kept the pieces for ourselves.
我们把那对儿拆了，然后一人分了一个。
Ross: What a beautiful story. Hey, I’m fine, by the way.
真是个美丽动人的故事。嗨，顺便说一句，我很好。
Monica: Oh, I’m sorry.
哦，对不起。
Rachel: Where’s Chandler?
Chandler哪去了？
Phoebe: Oh, he needed some time to grieve.
他需要一点时间哀伤一下。
Chandler: I’m free! I’m free!
我自由了！我自由了！
Phoebe: That oughta do it.
他应该这样做。

老友记.本章节注释

marshmallow peep：一种一般在复活节吃的彩色糖果。
flop：（笨拙地、不由自主地或松弛地）移动或落下。
cocktails in Appalachia：Appalachia是美国东部的山区，比较保守，在那里出现鸡尾酒就像就像乱伦一样了，莫妮卡只是有点夸张的比喻那“兄妹”的行为。
rambunctious：粗犷的，粗暴的。
jammies：睡衣裤。