奇幻人生（2006）

我的老天爷 – 这到底怎么回事？
HoIy crapping heII. -What the heII is that?
停下起重机，停下 – 停下起重机！
Stop the crane. Stop it. -Stop the crane!
嘿 – 嘿，你们在干什么？
Hey. -Hey, what are you doing?
我们？你在干什么？
Us? What are you doing?
我在看电视
I was watching TV.
我们要铲平这片地方 – 你们疯了吗？我住在这！
WeII, we’re demoIishing this pIace. -Are you nuts? I Iive here!
这是电视吗？ – 是的，是电视，我的电视！
Is that a TV? -Yes, that’s a TV! It’s my TV!
你的电视怎么到这来了？ – 我说了，我住在这，笨蛋！
WeII, what’s your TV doing in there? -I said I Iive here, stupid!
我的家当都在这！
It’s where I keep my stuff!
我的名字在那蜂鸣器上面！ 哈罗德·克里克
My name’s on the goddamn buzzer! HaroId Crick.
麦卡锡大街1♥8♥9♥3号♥，2B座
Apartment 2-B, 1 893 McCarthy!
你说的是1♥8♥9♥3号♥？ – 是的！
Did you say 1 893? -Yes!
我不太肯定这就是情节
I’m not exactIy sure it was pIot.
我希望你说这只是个倒霉的巧合
I was hoping you’d say it was just a reaIIy bad coincidence.
你保单过期那天遇到个保险代理人是巧合
Meeting an insurance agent the day your poIicy runs out is coincidence.
接到国王的信说他要来拜访那是情节
Getting a Ietter from the emperor saying that he’s visiting is pIot.
公♥寓♥被起重机拆了…
Having your apartment eaten by a wrecking baII…
完全是另一回事
…is something eIse entireIy.
哈罗德，你没有掌握自己的命运
HaroId, you don’t controI your fate.
我知道 – 是吗？
I know. -You do?
好吧，跟我来
Okay. Come with me.
嘿，汤姆，能把这个留到明天吗？
Hey, Tom, can you Ieave that tiII tomorrow?
你是对的，这个叙述者很可能要杀死你…
You were right. This narrator might very weII kiII you…
所以我建议你把这些都忘了 过你的日子去吧
…so I humbIy suggest that you just forget aII this and go Iive your Iife.
我就在过我的日子 我很想接着过我的日子
I am Iiving my Iife. I’d Iike to continue to Iive my Iife.
我知道，当然，我是说所有这些事 不管你还剩下几天
I know. Of course. I mean aII of it. However Iong you have Ieft.
我是说，霍华德，用这些日子去冒险
You know, I mean, Howard, you couId use it to have an adventure.
比如发明点东西 或者仅仅是读完《罪与罚》
You know, invent something, or just finish reading Crime and Punishment.
见鬼，哈罗德 如果你想的话，你可以只吃煎饼
HeII, HaroId, you couId just eat nothing but pancakes if you wanted.
你怎么回事？
What’s wrong with you?
嘿，我不想只吃煎饼，我想活着
Hey. I don’t wanna eat nothing but pancakes. I wanna Iive.
谁会在煎饼和活着之间选择…
Who in their right mind in a choice between pancakes and Iiving…
煎饼？
…chooses pancakes?
哈罗德，如果你停下来想一想 我相信你能明白…
HaroId, if you’d pause to think I beIieve you’d reaIize…
答案不可避免地决定于
…that that answer’s inextricabIy contingent…
你所过的生活的类型
…upon the type of Iife being Ied…
当然，还有你吃的煎饼的质量
…and, of course, the quaIity of the pancakes.
你不明白我的意思
You don’t understand what I’m saying.
我明白
Yes, I do.
但是你要明白这不是哲学或是文学理论
But you have to understand that this isn’t a phiIosophy or a Iiterary theory…
或者是我的故事 这是我的人生
…or a story to me. It’s my Iife.
当然，那就去过你一直想要的生活吧
AbsoIuteIy. So just go make it the one you’ve aIways wanted.
我从没想过他们要吃…
I never expected that they wouId have–
1个还是2个？ – 1个
Do you want one, two? -I want one.
1个？ – 2个
One? -I want two.
好吧，这就是你的房♥间
AII right, so here’s your room.
或者我喜欢称之为睡仓2号♥
Or as I Iike to caII it, SIeep Pod Two.
谢谢，戴维
Thanks, Dave.
别客气，伙计 很高兴你到这来
No probIem, dude. It’II be nice having you around.
你打算待多久？ – 我也不知道
How Iong you pIanning on staying? -I’m not sure.
戴维，我能问个抽象、完全是假设的问题吗？
Dave, can I pose a somewhat abstract, pureIy hypotheticaI question?
当然
Sure.
如果你知道你会死去…
If you knew you were gonna die…
很快就死去…
…possibIy soon…
你会做什么呢？
…what wouId you do?
我不知道
Wow, I don’t know.
我是世界上最富有的人吗？
Am I the richest man in the worId?
不，你就是你
No, you’re you.
我有超能力吗？
Do I have a superpower?
不，你就是你
No, you’re you.
我知道我就是我，但我有超能力吗？
I know I’m me, but do I have a superpower?
不，你为什么会有超能力？
No, why wouId you have a superpower?
不知道，你说这是假设的
I don’t know, you said it was hypotheticaI.
好吧，你有，你对数学很在行
Fine. Yes. You’re reaIIy good at math.
那不算超能力，那是技巧
That’s not a power, that’s a skiII.
好吧，你对数学在行，而且你是隐形的
Okay, you’re good at math and you’re invisibIe.
你知道你会死去 – 好的，好的
And you know you’re gonna die. -Okay, okay.
很简单，我要去空间夏令营
That’s easy, I’d go to space camp.
空间夏令营？
Space camp?
是的，是在阿♥拉♥巴马 在那里孩子们学怎样成为宇航员
Yeah, it’s in AIabama. It’s where kids go to Iearn how to become astronauts.
我9岁开始就一直想去
I’ve aIways wanted to go since I was 9.
你隐形而且要去空间夏令营？
You’re invisibIe and you’d go to space camp?
我没提隐形，你提的
I didn’t pick invisibIe, you picked invisibIe.
你去夏令营是不是岁数太大了？
Aren’t you too oId to go to space camp?
永远不嫌老，伙计
You’re never too oId to go to space camp, dude.
空间夏令营
Space camp.
122把吉他
One hundred and twenty-two guitars.
732根弦
Seven hundred and thirty-two strings.
257块治音器
Two hundred and fifty-seven pickups.
1♥8♥9♥把音量旋钮
One hundred and eighty-nine volume knobs.
哈罗德站在那，面对着他最古老的渴望
Here Harold stood, face to face with his oldest desire.
站着几乎是哈罗德唯一做的事情
And stand is almost all Harold did.
不只是找一把吉他
lt wasn’t just about finding a guitar.
是找一把能对哈罗德说点什么的吉他
lt was about finding a guitar that said something about Harold.
很不幸，这把吉他说：
Unfortunately, this guitar said:
“当我回到佐治亚的时候 那个女人会感受到我的痛苦的”
”When l get back to Georgia, that woman gonna feel my pain. ”
这排里的这把说：
This one said something along the lines of:
“为什么，是的，这些裤头是合成纤维的”
”Why, yes, these pants are Lycra. ”
这几把说“我很敏感，很有同情心…
These said, ”l’m very sensitive, very caring…
我一点也不知道怎样弹吉他”
…and l have absolutely no idea how to play the guitar. ”
“我要补偿点什么，猜猜是什么”
”l’m compensating for something. Guess what. ”
然后哈罗德看到了这把
And then Harold saw it.
一把受过严重虐待而损坏的 海绿色泡沫芬达吉他…
A damaged and terribly mistreated sea-foam-green Fender…
望着他
…staring back at him.
尽管有明显的损坏
Despite its obvious maladies…
这把吉他语气里带着自信和自傲
…the guitar spoke with conviction and swagger.
实际上，它平静地望着哈罗德的眼睛，说
ln fact, it looked Harold directly in the eye and very plainly stated:
“我摇起来”
”l rock. ”
深呼吸，注意点！
Just breathe. Watch it!
我们这有一位21岁男性胸部受到枪伤
We’ve got a 2 1 -year-oId maIe with a gunshot wound to the chest.
没错
There you go.
群殴时中枪了？ 哈罗德不是什么帮派的
Shot in a gang fight? HaroId’s not in a gang.
那个穿粗花呢衣服的人？
Man in tweed?
他没什么毛病 他只是看着病人
There’s nothing wrong with him, he just Iikes Iooking at sick peopIe.
不屑地说怪话
OddIy spoken with disdain.
这样不行
This isn’t working.
我不知道我们为何到这来
WeII– I don’t even know why we’re here.
我认为我们不该来这
I don’t think we’re supposed to be here.
你说我需要视觉刺♥激♥ – 我是说博物馆
You said I needed visuaI stimuIi. -I meant a museum.
我不需要见鬼的博物馆 我需要衰弱的人
I don’t need a goddamn museum. I need the infirm.
你就是
You are the infirm.
没错，问题是这些人没死
You’re right. The probIem is these peopIe aren’t dead…
他们只是受了重伤
…they’re just severeIy injured.
抱歉，快死了的人在哪？
Excuse me, where are the dying peopIe?
这些人♥大♥多数是病了或受伤了…
Most of these peopIe are sick or injured–
这很好，别误会我
Which is great, don’t get me wrong.
他们会好起来的，但这对我没用
but they’re gonna get better, which doesn’t reaIIy heIp me.
有什么办法去看看再也好不起来的人吗？
Is there any way to see the peopIe who aren’t going to get better?
什么？
Excuse me?
我想去看看，如果可能的话 那些挺不过去的人
I’d Iike to see, if at aII possibIe, the ones who aren’t gonna make it.
就是那些肯定快死了的人
You know, the dead-for-sure ones.
对不起，你是不是受了什么刺♥激♥？
I’m sorry, are you suffering from anything?
仅仅是写作障碍
Just writer’s bIock.
通过每次笨拙的弹奏
With every awkward strum…
哈罗德·克里克越来越坚信自我…
…Harold Crick became stronger in who he was…
树立自己的目标，明确活着的意义
…what he wanted, and why he was alive.
哈罗德不再独自吃饭
Harold no longer ate alone.
不再数笔画
He no longer counted brushstrokes.
哈罗德，回见 – 他不再打领带
HaroId, I’II see you. -He no longer wore neckties.
再见，戴维
Bye, Dave.