黑麦巷 Rye Lane（2023）

Me too.
大家来买♥♥辣椒吧，朋友们
Hey, guys! I’ve got chillies here, guys.
红辣椒、黄金辣椒、青辣椒
Chillies red, chillies gold, chillies green.
我叫它们辣椒红绿灯
And I call them the traffic lights of the chilli scene.
你好，叔叔
Hey, Uncle.
她来了，我寒冷早晨的热可可
Ah! Here she is. My hot cup of cocoa on a frosty mornin’.
I’ll see you soon, okay?
待会儿见，好吗？
我会开始计时
-I’ll be counting the seconds.
我有新鲜的辣椒…
I’ve got chillies fresh…
你叫唐，对吧？
It’s Dom, right?
我叫雅丝
I’m Yas.
很高兴认识妳
Nice to meet you.
好的
Eh? Okay.
所以你要去哪儿？
So, where you off to?
你妈让你跑腿帮她做什麽？
What errands has your mum got you out here runnin’?
奈森说你不用付帐单 所以我想你还住在家裡
Oh, Nathan mentioned you don’t pay bills, so I figured you still live at home?
我回去了，回家了
I’m back. Back at home.
「回」这个字很重要 否则就好像我从未离开过，但我有
“Back” is important, otherwise it sounds like I never left, and I did.
好的，有道理
Okay. Fair.
我要从这裡穿过去
I’m actually cutting through.
黑麦巷市场？
Rye Lane Market?
对，没错
-Yeah. Yeah.
算你好运，我正好也要走这边
Lucky for you, I’m going this way anyway.
那逃离肯德基爷爷之后，你现在做什麽？
So, what do you do now you’ve escaped the clutches of the Colonel?
快餐店之后的生活？
Like, with your post-KFC life.
我是会计
Oh, I’m an accountant.
真无聊
Boring.
好的
Okay.
吃不到免费的鸡米花了 但那算是一份体面的工作
No free popcorn chicken, but still, that’s like a proper job.
那并不是特别吸引人的工作
Yeah, it’s not particularly glamorous.
-没错 -但我其实很喜欢我的工作
– No. -But I actually kinda love it.
所以那是你梦寐以求的工作？
So, is that what you’ve always wanted to do,
还是你内心有极度渴望达成 但又受挫的志向？
or have you got yourself some thwarted ambition burning away in ya gut?
-妳知道妳非常… -迷人？
-You know, you’re very– -Peng?
有清新的亲切感？
Refreshingly disarming?
-妳问了很多问题 -我对别人的烦恼感兴趣
-You ask a lot of questions. -I’m interested in people’s messes.
-妳怎麽会认为我有烦恼？ -每个人都有烦恼
-What makes you think I’ve got a mess? -Everyone has a mess.
妳好
Hi.
好吧
Okay. Um…
妳知道吗？我觉得我一直都很想当会计
You know, I– I think I did always wanna be an accountant.
这…很奇怪吗？
Is that– Is that weird?
别问我，我小时候想成为歌♥手王子
Don’t ask me. I wanted to be Prince when I was little.
特别是《紫雨》中的王子
Specifically, Purple Rain Prince.
-真的吗？ -真的
-Yeah? -Yeah.
我还为自己做了一套服装之类的
I made myself a little costume and everything.
所以你是你们朋友中唯一想当会计的人？
So, are you the only wannabe accountant in your crew?
我的每个死党都以为 自己会成为足球员或网红
All my mates thought they were gonna be footballers or YouTube sensations,
在私人飞机上放鬆，过着非凡的人生…
chilling on private jets, living extraordinary lives…
你不喜欢私人飞机喔？
Oh, private jets not your ting, no?
妳知道维护费要多少钱吗？糟透了的投资
Do you know how much they cost to run? Terrible investment.
那妳呢？
-So, what about you?
妳是做什麽的？
What do you do anyway?
我？我是网红
Me? Well, I’m a YouTube sensation.
不是啦，我在服装界
Nah, I work in fashion.
所以有王子服装
Hence the Prince costume.
没错
-Exactly!
所以妳是设计师还是…
So you’re like a designer or–
你是说我当不了模特儿？
Oh, you saying I couldn’t be a model?
不是，我只是…以爲，因为妳…
-No. I just– assumed ’cause you– -Uh– Uh–
我是在逗你的啦
-I’m fuckin’ with you. -Oh.
我是一个你没听过的网路品牌的买♥♥手
I am a buyer for an online brand that you wouldn’t have heard of.
但我想做服装设计，那是我的最终目标
But I wanna design costumes. That’s, like, the end game.
-服装？ -对
– Costumes? -Yeah.
电视、电影、音乐影片 舞会礼服到异形母后诸如此类的
TV, films, music videos, ball gowns to alien queens to anything the fuck else.
但你知道这些黑心老闆想付我多少钱
But do you know how much these thieves wanna pay me
去当他们最基层的服装助理吗？
to be a bottom-level costume assistant?
应该不会很多吧
I’m guessing not a lot.
没有很多再除以零
Not a lot divided by fuck all.
再加上你的算法，10的平方根是…
Plus with your ting, the square root of ten is always, like, what–
大概3.16
3.16-ish.
好吧，我相信你
Okay. I’ll take your word for it.
但我没办法一觉醒来 就决定要成为服装设计师
But I can’t just wake up and decide to be a costume designer.
我还得付出努力
I’ve gotta pay my dues.
付出努力是指不付房♥租
And paying my dues means not paying my rent
或负担不起好喝的调酒
or being able to afford cute cocktails.
而我喜欢付房♥租 也很爱好喝的调酒，所以…
And I like paying my rent, and I love cute cocktails, so…
我知道，我懂
Yeah, I know. I get that.
但我会实现梦想的
But I’ll get there
总有一天
eventually.
-Oh. Oh.
把脚抬起来
Just put your feet up.
-不用，我可以 -好吧
-No. I’m okay. -Okay.
– Oh!
他们向前漫步
Onwards they stroll.
踏出的每一步 都让他们更靠近神祕的目的地
Each step bringing them closer to their mystery destination.
好吧，但不可以批评我，行吗？
Okay. But no judgments, yeah?
听起来有隐情喔
Mmm, sounds juicy.
-我不是在跑腿办事 -我早知道了，宝贝
-I’m not running errands. -Yeah, we’re past that, babe.
我要跟我的前女友见面，分手后的第一次
I’m gonna meet my ex for the first time since the break-up.
不会吧，但你还在说「分手」 所以是不久前的事？
Shit. And you’re still calling it “the” break-up, meaning it’s fresh?
三个月，但我们在一起六年
Three months. But we were goin’ out for six years.
六年？
Six years?
六年时间都能让你成为 完全合格的建筑师了
You could’ve become a fully qualified architect in that time.
是啊，真的很糟糕
Yeah. It was pretty bad.
糟透了
It is pretty bad.
我在不久前也经历了这种事
I went through the same sort of thing not too long ago.
是吗？
Yeah?
但我们交往只有一年多一点…
We were only together for a year and a bit though–
妳会每天醒来躺在床上 努力集中精力呼吸吗？
Did you wake up every day and lie there trying to muster the energy to breathe?
没有，因为是我提分手的
No. ‘Cause I finished with him,
所以我只感觉鬆了一口气 然后变得更强大，懂吗？
so I just felt kind of relieved and empowered afterwards, you know?
他想要改变我，而我的想法是 「想都别想，撒旦」
He was tryin’ to dilute my squash,
and I was like, “Not today, Satan.”
对不起，抱歉
I’m sorry. Sorry.
不用道歉，我替妳感到高兴
No, no, no, no. I’m happy for you.
提分手的那一方感觉一定很不错 但我永远都不会知道
Must be nice being on that side of it, not that I’ll ever know.
听我说，我相信有一天 你会有能力彻底毁掉某个人的人生
Hey, hey, I believe in your ability to completely destroy someone’s life one day.
谢谢
-Thanks. -Mmm.
所以是她跟你提分手的 我就只知道这麽多
Aight, so, she broke up with you. I know that much already.
其实要聊细节还是很困难，所以…
Actually, it’s still pretty hard to talk about the details, so…
好吧，抱歉，我们其实不…
Oh, okay, sorry. We don’t actually–
最让我受伤的是我以为我们很好
The bit that really hurts, I thought we were fine.
比很好还要好，我们都同居了
We were better than fine. We moved in together.
还有《汉密尔顿》前座的门票
We had Hamilton tickets. Stalls!
你们是很认真的
It’s a serious commitment.
就是嘛
Right?
那继续吧，都说出来吧，是怎麽回事？
So go on. Spill the tea! What happened?
当时我们要去看电影
So we were goin’ to the cinema.
Oh?
跟平时一样，我先到了，然后去买♥♥零食
I get there first, as usual, and I go buy the snacks.
卖♥♥弄自己很体贴
Mmm, stuntin’ on ’em.
妳根本不知道这女生有多挑剔
You don’t even understand how picky this girl is.
你好，我要3号♥套餐，中的焦糖咸爆米花
Hello. Hey. Um, can I get a number three with a medium sweet and salt popcorn
和一杯健怡可乐，谢谢
and, um, a diet cola please?
能把甜的放下面吗？这样吃起来像布丁
Um, uh, but can the sweet be on bottom? So it’s like pudding.
我已经快要暴怒了
I’m already ragin’.
对了，抱歉，饮料的冰块少一点
Oh, sorry. Uh, not too much ice in the drink.
一寸左右就好，要刚好一寸
Like an inch. Specifically, uh, an inch.
还有妳必须明白，我很重视电影院的礼仪
And you gotta understand, I take cinema etiquette seriously.
只要电影开始了，我就不会进去了
Like, I won’t go in once the film’s started.
你得尊重规则嘛
You gotta respect the code.
所以我就打给吉雅
-So, I call Gia.
喂，妳好…