我和厄尔以及将死的女孩

整天乱想
like all the time.
大家看着我会想”拍电影的”
People look at me and think, “Filmmaker.”
要不然就是这么想…
When they’re not already thinking…
-“那个癌症女的男朋友” -这是什么玩意儿
-“Cancer girl’s boyfriend.” -The hell even is this?
味道就像臭狗屎一样
It tastes like a dog’s funky-ass butthole.
还有 我们答应拍的那部片子
Furthermore, we agreed to do a film
该拍成什么样 一点概念也没有…
that we have no idea what it should look like…
该怎么说 怎么拍
or sound like, or even be.
我是说 我们连拍什么类型的
I mean, what the hell sort of film
都不知道 怎么拍
should we even make? Huh?
我当时怎么想的
I mean, what was I thinking?
你在想那个美女麦迪森
You were thinking that girl Madison
咪♥咪♥不错
had nice titties.
我想说 我也喜欢大胸妹
I mean, I like the titties too,
但是该烦恼的是你
but now you got a problem.
因为我压根就没有同意
‘Cause I ain’t agreed to do this shit.
是你同意的
You did.
你不想来帮我拍吗
Are you not gonna help me make this?
我们拍什么啊 兄弟
The hell we gonna make, son?
他们需要新鲜的灵感
They want fresh inspiration.
我得跟你说 我得到过的
I must tell you, the richest inspiration
最丰富的灵感…
I have ever known was…
来自于我在亚马逊与世隔绝的日子
during my period of quarantine in the Amazon.
当时 我和其他六七个人…
Where I and a half dozen other…
视线所及之处全是…
unfortunates had nothing to watch…
浑身是毛体型巨大的狼蛛…
but the bristling, leviathan tarantula…
爬满腐烂破败的茅草屋…
bunched up on the rotting, flimsy thatch…
离我们的脸大概只有20厘米
perhaps eight feet above our faces.
蜘蛛有拳头那么大
Spiders the size of your fist.
它们尖牙上的毒液闪闪发光…
Their fangs glistening with venom and…
数千只黑色的复眼
their thousand-fold black eyes
在黑暗中眼神呆滞
shining dully in the gloom.
在黑暗中你会听见
In the darkness, you would hear
突如其来的嘶嘶声…
the sudden anguished hiss…
那是一只蜘蛛正被成年豹蜂攻击…
of a spider being struck by an adult leopard wasp…
它们垂死挣扎时
and in their mortal struggle,
会跌落到某人的床上…
they would plummet to one’s bed…
各种咬啊 叮啊 打啊…
biting and stinging and thrashing…
你知道黄蜂也可以熏着吃吗
You know that you can smoke a hornet?
这样 你回答问题的时候看着我就好了
Okay, so just look at me when you answer the questions.
不要管镜头 好吗
Don’t worry about the camera, all right?
好的 蒂尼斯
Okay, Denise.
跟我讲讲瑞秋出生的情形吧
Tell me a little about Rachel’s birth.
嗯 瑞秋的出生
Uh, Rachel’s birth.
那是多么那难熬的经历啊
What an ordeal that was.
格雷戈 我就…跟你说一件事
Greg, just… let me tell you one thing.
我真的是一个好母亲 知道吗
I was a really good mom to her, you know?
真的
I really was.
有些单身母亲 她们的孩子过早地成熟…
Some single moms, their kids grow up too fast…
而我总是极力避免让瑞秋早熟
but I always tried to protect Rachel from that.
我尽了最大的努力
I did my very best to protect her from…
让她成长得慢一些 明白吗
growing up too quickly, you know?
明白
Right.
但是现在 我懂得有些事情…
And now, I’m learning that there are…
是你根本保护不了孩子的 你知道吗
protect your kid from, you know?
不管你做什么 你就是不能…
No matter what you do, you just…
那 她有什么喜欢的玩具吗
So, did she have any favorite toys?
在回答这个问题之前 这话是认真的…
Before I answer that question, this is serious…
所以你得给我好好听着
so use your ears and listen to me.
我希望你能保证一件事
I want you to promise me something
因为我很关心你
as I care about you.
你得向我保证 在你找到真爱之前…
You gotta promise me you’re not gonna have a baby…
千万别生孩子
unless you’re ready to love
除非你能爱她一辈子…
that baby’s mother your whole life…
我是认真的
and this is serious.
其他人不会像我这样告诉你
I’m telling you something that nobody’s gonna tell you.
不要找那些若即若离的女孩 听见没
Don’t pick a girl who’s push-pull, you know?
你得找一个全心全意爱你的…
You wanna pick somebody who’s gonna love you…
永远不会忘记你的…
and not forget you, and not…
不会为了某个大屁♥股♥贱♥人♥抛弃你的
leave you for someone with a big, fat ass.
这么说她没有最喜欢的玩具
So, no favorite toy.
嗯…
Um…
哦 你想知道的话 这里有一个
Oh, you want to know what? Here’s a favorite toy.
剪刀
Scissors.
瑞秋的爸爸先离开的时候…
When Rachel’s father first left…
她收集了他所有的书
she gathered up all his books,
把它们捆在一起 然后把它们都剪了
and she rounded ’em up and she cut them right up.
千万别跟她说是我告诉你的
Please, don’t tell her I’m telling you,
她会杀了我
she would chop my head off.
但她就这么…
But she just…
我当时想”干得好 闺女”
And I was, like, “Atta girl.”
喀嚓 喀嚓 喀嚓 她当时很生气
Snip, snip, snip. She was very mad.
我们能不能休息一下 喝点小酒
Can we take a little break and have a little taste?
你们应该到了可以喝酒的年纪吧
You boys are old enough to have a little taste, right?
我们就休息一小会 喝点小酒吧
Can we take a teeny break, just have a little taste?
好的 好孩子
Oh, yeah, that’s a good boy.
格雷戈 来一杯吗
Greg, will you join us?
哦 不用了
Oh, I’m okay.
来嘛 别扫我的兴嘛
Oh, come on, don’t be a party pooper!
那好吧
Alright, alright!
那我们接着采访吧
Now we can get back to our interview.
所以 基本上就是这么拍
So, basically, this whole setup
就这样 懂吧…
is so that, you know…
我能跟你说话 你也能跟我说话…
I can talk to you, you can talk to me…
我能看见你 你也能看见我
and I can see you, and you can see me.
只不过对面不是真正的我 是个手♥机♥
Except it’s not really me, it’s a phone.
我知道这听起来有点怪
And I know that sounds kind of weird,
但其实不怪
but it’s not.
反正就把它当成慰问卡
So, anyway, just treat it like a get-well card,
你们可以对着镜头
you can look into the lens.
然后…
And, uh…
就是个小视频嘛…
yeah, it’s a video, so you know…
别把它想得太难
don’t think about it too hard,
好好说就行
but just make it good.
准备好了就开始吧
Start whenever you’re ready.
嗨 瑞秋
Hi, Rachel.
我跟你虽然不是太熟…
I guess I don’t really know you that well…
但是我对你有信心 你会康复的
but I believe in you. You can do it.
说得挺好的
That’s real nice, yo.
你男朋友为你拍这个
It’s so sweet that your boyfriend
真是太甜蜜了
is doing this for you.
他一定很爱你
He must really love you.
妹子 那不是她男友
Girl, that ain’t her boyfriend.
哦
Oh.
我知道你是犹太人 但我还是想告诉你
I know you’re Jewish, but I just wanted you to know
上帝自有安排
that God has a plan for you.
你看着真的挺酷的
You seem like a really cool person.
我知道我们没说过几句话
I know we don’t really talk.
但你朋友很多 而且…
But you’ve got a lot of friends. And, uh…
在学校的这些人里头
out of all the people in this school,
我并不讨厌你
I don’t hate you.
我对你有信心 你会康复的
I believe in you and you can do it.
你会康复的
You can do it.
我对你有信心
I believe in you.
你会康复的
You can do it.
该死
Damn.
每个人都在对我说话
Everybody’s talking at me
我却一个字也听不进去
I don’t hear a word they’re saying
只有我的心思在回荡
Only the echoes of my mind
所以再次地
So again,