小屁孩日记2：罗德里克法则

-给我传纸条 -不 我没有
-Is passing me notes. -No, I wasn’t.
“你是怎么使你的秀发闻上去如此芬芳”
“How do you get your hair to smell so beautiful?”
好吧 纸条事件以失败告终
Okay, the note was a minor setback.
但至少我和罗德里克处得很好
But at least things are still going well with Rodrick.
真是匪夷所思 而且
It’s amazing, but I’m actually
我很喜欢看”尿不湿”乐队为参加达人秀做的彩排
enjoying watching Loded Diper rehearse for the talent show.
比尔把乐队水平提升到了一个新的高度
Bill’s taken the band to a whole new level.
有人放屁
Somebody farted.
我来 我来 我来一个
I got one. I got one. I got a good one. I got a good one.
有人放屁
Somebody farted.
看到我和罗德里克一起混 我老爸应该开心才对
My Dad should be happy that I’m hanging out with Rodrick.
但是我觉得他其实不喜欢比尔
But I don’t think he really likes Bill.
他好像担心我会变得像罗德里克
I think what he is worried about is I’ll turn out like Rodrick,
曼尼变得像我 最后我们都变得像比尔
Manny’ll turn out like me, and, eventually, we’ll all turn out like Bill.
摇滚起来
Rock ‘n’ Roll!
屌♥丝聚集地
摇滚万岁
Rock on. Yeah.
亲爱的格雷格 午餐前到美术室来找我
Dear Greg, meet me in the art room before lunch.
我有些话想问你 亲亲 霍莉
There is something I want to ask you. Kiss, kiss, Holly.
嗨 霍莉 收到你的纸条 我很开心
Hi, Holly! I was glad to get your note.
我一直都想找个机会和你说话
I’ve been wanting a chance to talk to you.
嘿 你喜欢画画
And, hey, you like to paint.
我自己也算个画家了 霍莉
I am kind of an artist myself. Holly?
-齐拉格 -你现在可以看见我了
-Chirag? -You see me now, don’t you?
比赛结束 我赢了 哈哈
Game, set and match to Chirag Gupta!
-嗨 霍莉 -嘿 弗莱戈利
-Hi, Holly. -Hi, Fregley.
她认为我是弗莱戈利
She thinks I am Fregley?
很伤心吧
That’s got to hurt.
你们想看我的秘密雀斑吗
Want to see my secret freckle?
写字条给女孩那事没成吗
So the note to the girl didn’t work out?
好吧 走 老弟 我带你出去玩玩
All right, let’s go, little bro. I am taking you out.
这是我家另外两个男子汉
And here are my other men.
格雷格 罗德里克
Greg, Rodrick,
这是我的编辑 赛尔兹先生和科汉夫人
I’d like you to meet my editors, Mr. Salz and Mrs. Kohan.
-嗨 -很高兴认识你
-Hey. Hello. -Hello. Nice to meet you.
你们要去干什么
Where you boys off to?
今晚我带老弟出去
Just taking the little brother out
他需要开心地玩一下
for the evening. He could use a good time.
好的 注意安全 九点回家
Okay, well, be safe, and be home by nine o’clock.
-好的 回头见 -拜拜
-Yeah, see you! -Bye.
-拜拜 玩得开心 -晚上过得愉快
-Bye. Have fun. -Good night.
这真是令人印象深刻
Now that is impressive.
我的大儿子根本就不愿跟他弟弟做任何事
My older boy wants nothing to do with his younger brothers.
你真是言传身教啊
You certainly practice what you preach.
我觉得镇上的每个妈妈都应该读你的专栏
I think every mother in town should read your column.
老妈如果知道我们这么吃 一定会杀了我们的
Mom would kill us if she saw us eating this.
冰到脑子了
Brain freeze!
我要说的是 准备好来点刺♥激♥的
All I can say is, get ready to have your mind blown.
我们将度过史诗般难忘的一夜
We are going to have an epic night.
你没事吧
Are you okay?
假呕吐物 经典笑话百试不爽啊
Fake vomit. You can’t beat the classics.
黑喂狗 黑喂狗 他来了
Here we go. Here we go. Here he comes.
好啊 很有趣啊 真有趣啊
Okay. Very funny! Very funny.
屌♥爆了
This is sweet.
我就说嘛
I told you.
你知道我写字条给她的那个女孩…
So you know that girl who I sent the note to…
怎么
Yeah?
她以为我是弗莱戈利
She thinks I am Fregley.
噢 小兄弟 我的意思是 别太难过
Oh, man. I mean, hey, don’t take it hard.
当女生喜欢你的时候 她们都会假装不喜欢
Girls act like they are not into you when they really are.
我指女生们总是表现地好像不喜欢我
I mean, tons of girls act like they’re not into me,
但是她们其实是喜欢的
but they are.
我知道她们喜欢我 我敢说那女孩也喜欢你
I know they are. I bet she really likes you.
切克闹 切克闹
Check it out. Check it out.
尼玛
Whoa!
-谁在那里 -不可能吧
-Who’s out there? -No way.
-马龙教练 -尼玛很有趣是吗 好啊
-Coach Malone? -Really funny, yeah? Oh, yeah!
你们这下挑错人了 老子尼玛是运动员
Well, you just messed with the wrong athlete!
快跑 快跑
Move, move.
有种出来啊
Show yourself.
你想搞我是吗 是吗 你想搞我是吗
You want to take me on? Yeah? You want to take me on?
你最好把菊花保护好 我是不会客气的
You better bring your a game, ’cause I am a competitor!
-快来 -你最好给我出来
-Come on! -You will come out!
不然让我抓到你 你就蛋疼了
You know I’m going to find you!
帮帮我
Help.
-来 -有点痒啊
-Come on. -Something tickles.
快 快 快
Come on. Come on. Come on.
你们是逃不掉的
You can’t outrun me!
我是光腚总菊
I’m a superstar!
不管你们逃到哪里 我都能追上
Everywhere you go, it’s me.
该死的太肥了
Stupid carbs.
那是购物中心 快
There’s the mall. Come on.
我跑不动了
I can’t go much further.
抓住你们了
Got you.
马龙教练
Coach Malone?
“你们是逃不掉的 我是光腚总菊”
“You can’t outrun me! I’m a superstar!”
“不管你们逃到哪里 我都能追上”
“Everywhere you go, it’s me.”
你们早了五分钟回来 玩得开心吗
You boys are five minutes early. Did you have a good time?
-过得非常开心 -那真是再好不过
-A great time. -That’s so sweet.
我真不敢相信你们的儿子处得这么好
I just can’t get over how well your boys get along.
哦 拉里 我们家组织严密 纪律森严
Well, Larry, we run a pretty tight ship around here.
人♥民♥当家做主什么的最有爱了
It’s all about boundaries, rules.
我给你看些你上次说到的
Anyway, let me show you some of those Civil War
内战演练照片吧
re-enactment photos l was telling you about.
-儿子 你们干了什么 -就在商场逛了逛
-So what did you boys do? -Just hung out at the mall.
谈谈人生什么的
And talked about life.
没什么特别的
Nothing special.
噢 天哪
Oh, my God.
罗德里克
Rodrick?
你能解释下这张照片里 你在干什么吗
Can you explain what you are doing in this photo?
那不是我
That’s not me.
-不是你 -不是
-That’s not you? -Nope.
好吧 那这些呢
Okay. How about these?
我真不敢相信你们开了个派对
I can’t believe that you had a party!
格雷格 你和我说只有几个孩子 是一次乐队彩排啊
Greg, you told me it was a couple of kids. A band rehearsal.
等等 苏珊 你知道这件事
Wait, Susan, you knew about this?
是的 是的 我知道
Yes. Yes. I knew.
什么 你告诉妈妈了
What! You told Mom?
我就知道他们开了个派对
I knew they had a party.
我不小心说漏嘴了 但是我补救了
It slipped out, but I took it back.
我就觉得你撒谎
My instincts told me you weren’t being honest,
我该相信我的直觉的
I should’ve trusted my instincts.
等等 你知道这件事 却没告诉我
Wait! You knew about this, but you did not tell me about it?
我还偏袒你了 我转移了妈妈的注意
I still protected you. I threw Mom off your scent.
干得好 她真是一无所知啊
Great job. She has no idea!
我们该是同一队的 一起对抗他们啊
We are supposed to be a team against them.
他们相处这么好 我就盲目地相信他们了
They are getting along so well, I let it blind me to the truth!
为什么你要拍照片
Why were you taking pictures?
那天早上这么忙 我忘记我们拍照片了
It was so crazy that morning, I forgot we took the pictures.
我很抱歉 我没深究这事
So I let it slide. And I am so sorry.
能把这件事说出来真是太好了
Oh, God. It feels so good to get that out.
这两星期来我都没有锁浴室门…
I haven’t been able to lock at that bathroom door for two weeks…
我就知道那扇门上有把锁
I knew that door had a lock on it.
你们差点让我以为是我脑残了
And everybody was trying to make me feel like I was losing my mind.
我们就自己从外面把门带上了哈
We’re just gonna let ourselves out.
放心 我不会给这事写专栏的
I wouldn’t write a column about this.
我要上楼去…
I’m going upstairs…
去一间有锁的卫生间
To a bathroom that has a lock on it,
谁也别告诉我那扇门上没锁
and no one can tell me that it doesn’t.
我要去和你♥爸♥爸谈谈
I have to go, talk to your father.