BJ单身日记2：理性边缘

Mr. And Mrs. Darcy.
达西勋爵和夫人
Lord and Lady Darcy.
不知道马克·达西当父亲会是个什么样子
Wonder what Mark Darcy would be like as a father.
对他的孩子而言 不是对我
To his children, I mean, not to me.
那就有些诡异了 恋父情结的想法
That would be a weird, Oedipus-like thought.
终于 生活走上了正轨
At last, life is on track.
布丽姬特·琼斯 未婚妻 妻子…
Bridget Jones: Fiance, wife…
母亲
mother.
糟糕
Bugger.
幻想过在黑暗中和一个陌生人做♥爱♥吗
Ever fancied doing it in the dark with a total stranger?
好吧 或许不完全是陌生人
All right, perhaps not a total stranger.
走开 克利弗
Back off, Cleaver,
不然我向性骚扰委员会举报你
or I’ll report you to a sexual harassment tribunal.
我是个正经记者
I’m a serious journalist.
这是你最正经的一条裙子吗 琼斯
Is that your most serious skirt, Jones?
你喜欢吗
Do you like it?
我以为你讨厌电视
I thought you hated television.
我讨厌看电视 但上电视…你好
I hate watching television. Being on it is… Hello there.
…又是另外一回事了
…an entirely different proposition.
丹尼尔 马德里的那段太棒了
Daniel, thought the Madrid piece was outstanding.
见解独到 角度新颖
Full of insight, really original.
谢谢 杰里米 十分感谢
Cheers, Jeremy. Thanks, mate. I really appreciate that.
那段我们花了很多心思
We had to work really hard on that one.
混♥蛋♥ 说到混♥蛋♥ 马克·达西还好吗
Tosser. Talking of which, how is Mark Darcy?
-你还跟他… -是的 我们还在一起
– You still…? – Yes, I am.
而且我们准备长♥期♥发展下去
And I intend to be for a very very long time.
很好 你知道我对任何
Good, excellent. You know what a fan
嫁给马克·达西的女人都充满兴趣
I am of any woman married to Mark Darcy.
-这个玩笑不好笑 -不过说真的 琼斯
– That’s not funny. – Seriously, though, Jones,
说句真心话 我很担心你
speaking purely unselfishly, I worry about you.
你知道一个公认的事实是
You do know that it’s an acknowledged fact
大多数律师的太太是死于无聊吧
that most lawyer’s wives die of boredom?
那你呢 还在到处找人上♥床♥吗
And what about you? Still shagging anything that moves?
实际上 没有 完全没有找人上♥床♥
As a matter of fact, no. No shagging whatsoever.
我在看这方面的医生
I’m in shag therapy.
原来我生病了
It turns out I have a problem.
我参加互助会 谈论我的感受
I go to meetings, talk about my feelings.
拥抱臭烘烘的人
Hug people who smell.
-我不相信 -我在努力…
– I don’t believe you. – I’m trying…
…做一个更好的人 布丽姬
…to be a better man, Bridge,
这样遇到下一位更优秀的女人的时候
so that the next time a better woman comes along,
我就不会再搞砸了
I won’t make a pig’s ear of it.
丹尼尔 到时间开会了
Daniel. Meeting?
好的 谢谢
Yeah, yeah. Thanks.
头发很好看 琼斯
Very good hair, Jones.
顺便问下 你今晚有空一起吃晚餐吗
By the way, um, you’re not free for dinner tonight, are you?
没空 我要去参加法律委员会晚宴
No, I’m not. I’m going to the Law Council Dinner.
是个很重要的晚宴
It’s a very important evening.
我穿不了这件
I can’t wear that.
布丽姬特 你想结婚吗
Bridge, do you want to get married
想在绝经之前生宝宝吗
and have babies before you become barren?
相信我…
Trust me…
麦珂 我唯一的成年朋友 嫁给了马克的合伙人
Mac, my only grown-up friend. Married to Mark’s partner.
她就是在法律委员会晚宴上订婚的
She actually got engaged on the night of the Law Council Dinner.
穿上它试裙子
Try it with the dress.
我的天啊
Oh, my God!
记住 我们尝试让你小两码
Remember, we are trying to reduce your body size by 15 per cent.
你拉住前面 我拉后面 一二三…
You hold the front, I’ll hold the back. One, two, three…
里面是什么情况
What’s going on in there?
看起来其实还不错
Not too bad, actually.
好看吗
Tra-la!
太美了
Fantastic.
好的 我们开始吧
Right, let us begin.
我会把你打造成公主
I am going to make you into a princess.
我美翻了
太好了
Goody.
有天才发型师打理简直太靠谱了
Nothing like being in the hands of a total genius.
我完蛋了
-无论你想做什么… -见鬼
– Whatever you do… – Bugger it.
…别熨你头发就成
…don’t iron your hair.
比我预想的糟糕得多
It’s a lot worse than I thought.
可以试试用发胶弄平
We could flatten it with Brylcream.
假发怎么样 律师都爱假发
What about a wig? Lawyers love wigs.
我觉得你金发比较好看
I preferred you in the gold.
不 什么颜色都好 千万别选金色
No, whatever you do, definitely not the gold.
这下好了 我顶着一头疯子样的头发迟到
Great. I’m late with mad hair
塑身内衣还勒得我几乎无法呼吸
and can barely breathe in scary knickers.
天哪 我好担心
Oh, God. I’m very worried.
要是有人说”布丽姬特·琼斯
What if someone says “Bridget Jones,
滚出去 你太可笑了”怎么办
get out of here, you are ridiculous”?
别想了
Stop it.
当然最重要的事
The most important thing, of course,
是看起来美丽动人
is to look absolutely wonderful
惊艳登场
and make a magnificent entrance.
♪ I just can’t get you out of my head… ♪
不好意思 我来晚了
Hi. Sorry I’m late.
大家好
Hello.
布丽姬特 我觉得你应该去一趟洗手间
Bridget, I think you should go to the ladies.
我出门之前去过了
But I went before I left home.
相信我
Trust me on this one.
糟糕
Not good.
没事 小小的化妆失误
All right, tiny make-up mistake,
但我总能凭借幽默风趣赢回场子
but I always have wit and conversation to fall back on.
谢谢
Thank you.
-布丽姬特 -你好
– Bridget. – Hello.
德瑞克 霍雷肖 卡米拉
Derek, Horatio, Camilla.
-霍雷肖 -是的 霍雷肖
– Horatio? – Yes, Horatio.
霍雷肖刚刚还说他极力反对慈善捐助
Horatio was just saying he’s totally against charitable giving.
-怎么了 -你明显是在开玩笑
– What? – Well, obviously you don’t mean it.
我没开玩笑 比如你在街上遇到乞讨者
Absolutely. You take a beggar on street.
你觉得施舍50便士有什么用吗
Do you think it’s helpful to give fifty pence?
-或许他只是饿了 -别那么天真
– Maybe he’s just hungry. – Don’t be so naive.
你每天在地铁站外看到的那些人
The people you see outside the tube every day
是主动选择过这种生活的
are there by choice.
-就是这样 -不是这样的
– End of story. – Oh, no, it’s not.
有些人是有严重的个人问题
Some people have terrible personal problems,
其他人可能
and other people might have
在某场悲剧的渡轮事故中失去了家人
lost their family in some, you know, tragic ferry disaster.
而有些人不过是对生活绝望了
And some people are just plain hopeless.
说实话 这种鬼话正是
Honestly, this is the sort of rubbish
来自伦敦附近地区
you’d expect from fat, balding
秃顶的中上阶层保守党白♥痴♥会说的话
Tory, Home Counties, upper-middle-class twits.
我表现得怎么样
How did I do?
你似乎给大家留下了深刻印象
You seem to have made quite an impression.
我安排你坐在吉尔斯·本威克旁边
Listen, I’ve put you next to Giles Benwick.
-我不挨着你坐吗 -不 他人很好
– Oh, I’m not sitting next to you? – No. He’s terribly nice,
但他的妻子刚跟我们一位合伙人跑了
but his wife’s just run off with one of the partners.
他大概不会提起这事 但你最好能知情
He probably won’t mention it, but you should know.
我一直都明白自己配不上她
I always knew she was out of my league.
你看 有些人是佼佼者
You see, there’s the high-fliers,
比如安娜贝尔和马克·达西
like Annabel and Mark Darcy
有些人生得漂亮 比如瑞贝卡
and there’s the gorgeous girls, like Rebecca there
剩下的就是普通人了
and there’s the rest of us.
比如你我是吗
Like you and me, you mean?
正是如此
Absolutely.
看看我俩这鬼样子
I mean, look at the state of us.
如果你和我跌跌撞撞错进了贵宾室
You and me stumbled into the VIP room by mistake
用不了多久 他们就会让我们走人
and it’s only a matter of moments before they show us the door.
阁下们 女士们 先生们
My lords, ladies and gentlemen,
我们开始问答赛吧
let the quiz begin.
太好了 我喜欢问答赛
Oh, goody. I love quizzes.
玩了这么多年的全民猜谜大挑战 终于派上用场了
All those years of playing Trivial Pursuits are about to pay off.