失常（2015）

It’s good to splurge every now and again.
艾米莉和我在亚克朗为特斯曼工作
Emily and I work for tessman in akron.
我们只是客服代表而已
We’re only customer service reps,
所以我们的薪水 你懂的
so you can imagine our salaries.
-特斯曼吗 -特斯曼食品
-Tessman? -Tessman foods.
我们做袋装烘焙食品生意 销往整个中西部
We make packaged bakery items shipped all over the midwest.
迷你蛋糕
Nibble-o’s,
巧克力砖
choco-bricks,
苹果派 草莓蛋糕
apple-flats, strawberry trifles,
装饰甜品 蛋糕卷
knick-knacks, scroochies?
嗯嗯 很棒呢
Oh, yes. Yes. Splendid.
我很熟悉的
I’m familiar.
别忘了还有布朗尼球呢
Brownie balls, don’t forget.
布朗尼球 是的 是新品呢
Brownie balls. Yeah, they’re new.
又见到你了 有什么需要的吗
Hello again. What can I get you?
噢 你好
Oh, hi.
女士们想要点什么
Uh, do you ladies know what you want?
呃 请给我一杯苹果莫吉托
Um, I’ll have an apple mojito, please.
你能加点苹果杜松子酒吗
Can you make those with apple schnapps?
那可是很棒的
Yum. Yum. Yum.
可以的
I think probably.
那听起来真的很棒
That sounds really, really good.
我也要一杯
I’ll have the same.
那先生您呢
And for you, sir?
雪树伏特加马提尼
Belvedere Martini,
不要甜 不加冰 加柠檬皮卷
dry, straight-up, twist.
马上就来
I’ll be back in a minute.
那么 你们俩平时都有哪些娱乐活动呢
So, what do you ladies do for fun?
除了喝酒吗
Besides drinking?
-艾米莉 别说了 天哪 -嘿
-Emily, stop! God! -Hey!
呃 我挺喜欢喝酒的
Well, I like to drink.
我也是 但是我们还会干些别的事的
I do, too! But we do lots of other things.
-我们会徒步旅行 骑自行车什么的 -是的
-We hike and bike ride. -Yeah.
我喜欢读书 看电影
I love to read. Go to the movies.
我玩拼字游戏还挺拿手的
I’m pretty good at scrabble.
-脱衣扑克牌戏 -艾米莉
-Strip poker. Um… -Emily!
你们俩是老朋友了吗
Have you two been friends long?
从初中起就是了
Since junior high.
哦 我会一点犹太单簧口琴
Oh, I play the Jew’s harp a little.
我不喜欢说“犹太单簧口琴”这个词
I don’t like to say “Jew’s harp”
因为这会冒犯到犹太人
because it’s offensive to Jews.
总之我买♥♥了一个 呃 然后自教
Anyway, I bought one of those, um, self-teaching…
自教
Self-teaching?
是这样说的吗
Is that right?
还是叫自学
Or is it self-learning?
犹太单簧口琴是种被低估的乐器
The Jew’s harp is an underrated instrument.
我也觉得
I know!
大家都觉得它没什么可稀罕的 你知道吗
People think of it as just this thing, you know?
嗯嗯
Mmm-hmm.
酒来啦 大伙儿 两杯苹果莫吉托
Here we are, folks. Two apple mojitos.
-谢谢你 嗯 -谢谢
-Thank you. Mmm. -Thanks.
不客气 还有这位先生的雪树伏特加马提尼
You’re welcome. And one more Belvedere Martini for the gentleman.
谢谢
Thanks.
敬 我们自己
To us.
快点快点 我们要错过电梯了
Hurry, hurry. We’re gonna miss the elevator.
快快快
Go. Go, go, go!
别闹了 艾米莉
Emily, stop it.
我们在哪层楼来着
What floor are we, anyway?
十楼
Ten.
你确定吗 我觉得
Are you sure? I think…
不 我想按的 倒霉
No, I want to press it! Darn it.
抱歉啦 我的手快了一点
Sorry. My hand just jumped.
我喜欢按按钮
I love pressing the buttons.
很抱歉
I’m sorry.
总是你在按 丽萨 别那么贪心
You always get to press it, Lisa. Don’t be greedy.
我知道 因为我喜欢啊
I know. ‘Cause I love it.
那是多么 我也不知道
It’s so… I don’t know…
按钮啊 不 不是那样说的
Buttony. No, that’s not it.
呃 按钮钮的
Mmm, buttonish?
喜欢按按钮会不会很蠢
Is it stupid to like to press buttons?
别说了 丽萨
Shut up, Lisa.
按按钮是件很有趣的事情
Pressing buttons is good clean fun.
是的 就是那样的
Exactly! That’s exactly right.
听到了吗 小艾
See, em?
很高兴遇见你们两位女士
It was nice getting to meet you ladies.
哦 能和你一起喝酒也是我们的荣幸
Oh, it was an honor spending time with you.
谢谢你的莫吉托
Thank you for all those mojitos!
不客气
My pleasure.
嗯 真的很感谢你
Yes, thank you kindly.
莫吉托 莫吉托 多么有趣的名字啊
Mojitos. Mojitos. What a funny word.
不客气
You’re welcome.
莫吉托
Mojitos.
呃 我要朝这边走 所以晚安咯
Well, I go this way, so I’ll say good night.
噢 呸【】
Oh, pooh.
嗯 呸【】
Yeah, pooh on you.
呸呸呸【】
Pooh, pooh, pooh.
晚安 迈克尔
Good night, Michael.
说晚安 丽萨
Say good night, Lisa.
晚安 迈克尔
Good night, Michael.
呸
Pooh.
晚安
Good night.
呃
Uh…
噢 丽萨
Oh, Lisa?
嗯
Yes?
呃
Uh…
我在想你愿不愿意
I was wondering if maybe you’d want
来我的房♥间喝点睡前饮料
to come to my room for a little nightcap.
哦
Oh.
我知道当着你的面问有点奇怪 艾米莉
I feel odd asking in front of you, Emily.
但是我不知道还有什么方法
But I didn’t know how else…
不 不 没关系的
No, no. That’s okay.
我理解的
I understand.
你确定你不是要邀请艾米莉吗
You sure you don’t mean Emily?
大家都更喜欢艾米莉一些的
Everyone always likes Emily better.
呃
Uh…
呃 这真尴尬
Ugh. This is awkward.
我先回房♥间了 丽萨
I’m going to the room, Lisa.
到时候再见了 玩得开心
I’ll see you later maybe. Have fun.
小艾 我和你一起来的
Em, I came here with you.
我不能抛下你一个人
I’m not going to just abandon you.
喔 别傻了 丽萨
Oh, don’t be an idiot, Lisa.
他很棒
He’s gorgeous.
嗯 这没事吗
Yeah, it’s okay?
好好玩吧
Have fun.
晚安
Good night.
呃 我的房♥间在这边
So, I’m over this way.
好
Okay.
玩得开心 晚安
Have fun. Good night.
噢
Oh!
喔 天哪
Oh, Jesus!
你没事吧
Are you okay?
我没事 没事
I’m okay, I’m okay.
我总是这样
It happens all the time.
嗯
Mmm?
噢
Oh.
看看你的房♥间是多么整洁啊
Look how neat you left your room,
床边还放了一双拖鞋
with the little slippers laid out next to the bed
毯子也铺好就等着你去睡了
and the blanket turned down all ready for sleepy time.
不 这都是服务员整理的
No, the maid did that.
他们晚上来房♥间把东西都整理好
They come and fix it up at night.
这叫做夜床服务