22对决地球（2021）

生之来处
在乔伊·高纳到来之前
不 等等 尼普顿 相信我 别去地球 不值得
No, wait, Neptune, trust me. Do not go to Earth. It’s not worth it.
那地方肮脏 潮湿 孤独
That place is dirty and wet and lonely and…
拜托 尼普顿 还记得我们的即兴舞会吗
Come on, Neptune, remember our, our spontaneous dance party.
还记得吗 想快乐地起舞 就跟我留在这儿吧
What? Stay here with me if you wanna get funky!
但我现在可以去地球了
But I can go to Earth now.
没错 你可以去了 祝贺你
Yes, you can. Congratulations.
你获得了地球通行证
You completed your Earth Pass.
22没拿到 -暂时还没
And 22 did not. – Not yet.
她没有获得人生的理由
She has no reason to live.
她在努力了
She’s working on it.
你有什么了不起的 浮在空中的笨石头
Oh, what makes you so great, you stupid floating rock?
偷走了我所有的朋友
Stealin’ all my friends.
我倒要让你见识见识 如果我
How would you like it if I…
如果我阻止灵魂去往你那里
If I stopped souls from visiting you?
那他们就得跟我留在这儿了
Then they would have to stay here with me.
22对抗地球
你们是没有思想的白纸
You are mindless blank slates.
我们是没有思想的白纸
We are mindless blank slates.
你们漫无目的
You have no purpose.
我们漫无目的
We have no purpose.
直到现在
Until right now.
恭喜你们 你们五个灵魂被选中
Congratulations. You five souls have been chosen…
恭喜你们 你们五个灵魂
Congratulations, you five souls…
不 停下 别重复这部分 停下
No, stop it. Don’t repeat that part. Stop it.
别重复这部分 停下
Don’t repeat that part. Stop it.
你们被选中加入一个特别的秘密组织
You have been selected to be members of an exclusive, secret organization
这个组织的唯一目标就是阻止灵魂
whose only purpose is to prevent souls
前往那个无聊星球
from going to the dumb planet
地球上去
known as Earth.
我们这个无人可挡的组织有没有一个超酷的名字
Does our unstoppable gang have a really cool name?
当然有了
Yes, it does.
我们就叫地球毁灭
We shall be known as The Apocalypse.
这个你们可以重复一遍
You can repeat that.
地球废灭
Amock-a-trips!
地球灰灭
A-pick-a-fizz!
地球毁灭
Apocalypse.
阻止朋友去往傻帽地球的
Anonymous Provocateurs and Other Culprits
匿名反叛者构成的犯罪组织
that are Against Leaving Your friends to go to Pathetic Stupid Earth.
可是我喜欢地球
But I like Earth.
不 你不喜欢 你讨厌地球
No, you don’t. You hate Earth.
我讨厌地球
I hate Earth.
我也是 我讨厌地球
Me, too. I hate Earth.
我讨厌地球
I hate Earth!
我讨厌地球 我讨厌地球 -很好
I hate Earth! I hate Earth! – Yes!
地球毁灭来了
The Apocalypse is now.
跟我来 -地球毁灭来了
Follow me. – Apocalypse now!
我们的任务是阻止灵魂找到他们的火花
Our mission, stop souls from discovering their inspiration.
没有火花 他们就拿不到地球通行证
Without inspiration, they can’t complete their Earth Pass.
答对了 通心粉
Bingo, Macaroni.
那样他们就得跟我们留在这儿了
And then they have to stay here with us.
哦对了 我给我们起了很酷的代号♥
Oh, by the way, I gave us all cool codenames.
通心粉 小齐米 小花生 小豆子 小月光
Macaroni, Zimmy, Peanut, D-pac, Moonbeam,
小奶酪和小饼干
Cheese, and Crackers.
我们是地球毁灭
We are The Apocalypse!
地球废灭 -地球灰灭
Amock-a-trips! – A-pic-a-fizz!
尽管偷别心软
Steal everything you can.
很好 继续前进
Nice job. Keep going.
我们是地球毁咩
We are The Apollo-Miss!
很好
Yes!
快去快去
Go! Go!
干得漂亮 小花生
Nice, Peanut.
开车真好玩
Driving is fun!
我要去地球啦
I’m goin’ to Earth!
不行 我让你去偷东西 不是找火花
No! I told you to steal, not be inspired!
等等 小花生 停下
Wait! Peanut, stop!
地球可差劲了
Earth is bad!
行吧 我们才不需要小花生呢
Fine. We don’t need Peanut.
我以为我叫小花生
I thought I was Peanut.
说实话这也挺好
In fact, this is good.
我很高兴小花生离开了
I’m glad Peanut left.
我也是
Me, too.
你同意我说的每一句话吗
You always agree with everything I say?
我同意
I agree!
你没有自己的想法 我喜欢
You have no original thoughts and I like that.
小齐米是个追随者
Zimmy’s a follower.
我是追随者
I’m a follower!
别啊
No!
又来了 小齐米 回来
Not again. Zimmy, come back! Ugh!
嘿 22 真巧啊
Hey, 22. What a coincidence.
什么都别承认
Deny everything.
真高兴看到你结交新朋友
It’s so nice to see you making new friends.
他们不是我朋友 我从没见过他们
These aren’t my friends. I’ve never seen them before.
我喜欢22
I love 22.
你不认识我
You don’t know me.
我不认识22
I don’t know 22.
我喜欢说谎话
I love lying!
地球上的政♥治♥家还不够多吗
Ugh! As if Earth needs another politician.
你们阻止不了我们的
You can’t stop us.
我们是地球吠灭
We’re The Acapulco-lisp.
嘿 松口 好痒
Whoa, there. Stop it. Tickles.
和强权抗争到底 小月光
Fight the power, Moonbeam.
哦 不是吧 -我是只狗狗
Oh, come on! – I’m a doggie!
我可不想当这孩子的父母
I’d hate to be that soul’s parents.
我们失败了
We failed.
我失败了
I failed.
我的朋友都长久不了
None of my friends stay my friends.
他们都离开了我
They all leave me.
除了你 通心粉
Except for you, Macaroni.
这轮算你赢 你个傻帽星球
You’ve won this round, ya dumb planet.
你可以把所有对我有意义的人都带走
You can take everyone that ever meant anything to me,
但你永远也得不到我这个灵魂
but you’ll never get this soul.
我以我不存在的身体起誓
I swear over my nonexistent body,
我永远都不会去地球的
I will never go to Earth…
或许终有一天22会去往地球 领悟人生的意义
Maybe someday 22 will finally go to Earth and learn what the meaning of life is.
仔细想来 人生的意义是什么呢
Come to think of it, what is the meaning of life?
你不知道吗 -没人告诉过我
You don’t know? – Nobody told me.
其实很简单 我们活着都是为了
Oh, it’s simple, really. We’re all here for the purpose of…
就这样吗
Is that it?
这么一说感觉很平庸啊
Sounds so banal when it’s said out loud.
真挺无聊的
Too bad, really.